Author Topic: Pure aka http://www.helpyourteens.com? Good idea or bad idea  (Read 4860 times)

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Offline FaceKhan

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Pure aka http://www.helpyourteens.com? Good idea or bad idea
« on: October 27, 2002, 06:00:00 PM »
I recently began seeing a lot of activist links to http://www.helpyourteens.com



Supposedly it is a free consultant service to help refer parents to legitimate programs for teens. They are rabidly anti-wwasp which I take as a good sign. My only questions about them come because they use a lot of the same language as other pro-program sites and they use the same kinds of vague criteria for assessing whether a teen needs  "treatment". They also seem to regard "behavior modification" as treatment. Now there is some confusion over the use of this term, since it has become rather generic but behavior modification originally came from methods of brainwashing that are completely repugnant to mental health. I can't remember the "inventors" name but I do remember that his own daughter killed herself after being subjected to his idea of parenting.



So the question becomes is PURE a good idea or not. Is there a place for a kinder gentler teen treatment industry? Or is this just a group of parents who despite recognizing the dangers of this kind of involuntary "treatment" will not let go of the assumption that they, the parents, have some kind of moral highground in settling family problems by having their teen kidnapped and sent to some kind of program whether good or bad.

[ This Message was edited by: FaceKhan on 2002-10-27 15:03 ]
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Offline Anonymous

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Pure aka http://www.helpyourteens.com? Good idea or bad idea
« Reply #1 on: October 27, 2002, 09:48:00 PM »
This section is really cause for concern... especially that quiz thing that is supposed to evaluate your child's "danger level".

Look at some of the criteria on that quiz... "Has rejected family values... no longer takes interest in family activites..." etc. Those are absolutely normal and healthy signs of a teenager beginning to assert his/her own identity--"I'm a person in my own right" as opposed to "I'm my mom and dad's kid". And if you look at the sheer percentages, at least 90% of teens have tried tobacco at some time or other, 60% illegal drugs, the majority have had sex... does that mean that they should all be in residential treatment programs? I don't think so!!!

I'm a perfectly normal young adult now, 19 and in college, making normal-ish grades. Thankfully I was never subjected to a residential program, but my parents threatened it several times. Just for fun, I put in the answers my parents would have, when I was a teen. The result? 67%... High Risk... "A treatment program is highly recommended." I was a normal teen, and I'm a normal adult!
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Offline FaceKhan

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Pure aka http://www.helpyourteens.com? Good idea or bad idea
« Reply #2 on: October 28, 2002, 03:00:00 AM »
Yeah I had the same issue with that quiz. I was depressed at a teen and although I never was never sent anywhere several people I know have been sent to wildnerness programs and I am pretty sure that a kid I was friends with in 6th grade was sent because he went to some boarding school after around 9th or tenth grade and came back for senior year and in general people do not switch schools senior year and I knew his parents were insane.








I went through and answered yes on just the questions that "you suspect or have reason to beleive or fear drug use, sex etc." and it comes up as 40% or moderate risk with just those with no actual negative behavior checked just the parents concerns checked. How is it that if a parent is afraid of drug use or sexual promiscuity or does not approve of the kid's friends does that translate into mental illness on the part of the teen? Still after reviewing other parts of the site I think they are on the right track and I would much rather a parent go to that site than one of WWASPS's.



I am 19 and in college too, heh funny how things work out fine when your not kidnapped to a prison complex and the kids who went to these programs still don't get along with their parents and often still don't lead normalish lives. I know that if I ended up in a place like tranquility bay at 15 I would have probably gone completely insane and either killed myself or killed some staff members. One of my lifelong convictions has been the right of self-defense so I would have faced no ethical dilemma in killing my captors since anyone who works for these people deserves to be burned at the stake. I actually found about these teen concentration camps a few months after I had started unschooling as a solution to my depression which was mostly school and anxiety related.

The programs definitely become an addiction for the parents. When their kid comes home and goes things go back to the way they were before the program (even a safe and professional one) a few months later because the family is the problem and not just the teen the parents go find another program. One of my friends who was kidnapped to a wildnerness program 2 summers ago, a few months before he turned 18, has now been forced (under penalty of being cut off and kicked out) to go to an 18+ program. Of course the 18+ program is basically a joke according to him because it just gives him the distance from his parents that he wanted anyways and he can pretty much do whatever he wants, he just lives with the program.

I just feel that in many ways the residential treatment industry as a whole is a fraud and we need legislation that requires a hearing before children and teens can be committed because there is just too much potential for abuse in any system that allows parents to commit their children without any proof of actual need.


 

[ This Message was edited by: FaceKhan on 2002-10-28 00:19 ]
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Offline Antigen

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Pure aka http://www.helpyourteens.com? Good idea or bad idea
« Reply #3 on: October 28, 2002, 02:04:00 PM »
I spoke with Sue briefly a week or two ago. She couldn't exactly tell me how she goes about qualifying good or legitimate programs and had no response at all, I mean like confused silence, to my suggestion that a parent should start with college admissions departments when looking for boarding school recomendations.

Here's where she's coming from:
http://www.helpyourteens.com/true_story.html

I think this woman is severely misguided. A lot of Straight survivors sort of land up in the same mindset. They think that some things about the Program were bad, but overall it's a good thing. The seek out a kinder, gentler Program. What they wind up with is SAFE. Turns out, when you take out the most effective aspects of the thought reform regimen, all you wind up with is an ineffective and therefore needlessly long program. Some of these places now take in excess of 2 years to properly break their charges. At least in the days of The Seed, most people got in and out after only about 8 - 12 months.

It would be interesting to get ahold of the daughter and see what she has to say about it all. Weston, btw, doesn't have a bad neighborhood. It's a Westinghouse planned community to the west of Ft. Lauderdale. Totally Stepford!
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Offline GregFL

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Pure aka http://www.helpyourteens.com? Good idea or bad idea
« Reply #4 on: October 28, 2002, 07:41:00 PM »
You an me ginger, we think alike. As a matter of fact, we just had this conversation last week!

Have I told you lately how much I admire you?
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Offline Antigen

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« Reply #5 on: October 31, 2002, 10:22:00 AM »
:smile:
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Offline FaceKhan

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« Reply #6 on: October 31, 2002, 03:26:00 PM »
I think also you are forgetting that the primary impetus for the people running most of these programs is money and in some cases power over others. Therefore it does not matter whether they break the person in 1 day or 2 years they still will insist that they are not cured until the money runs out. When the parents have blown the college fund, taken out a 3rd mortgage and have a hefty tax debt and they can't pay anymore then their kids are elevated up the program ladder as quickly as possible and encouraged to leave.
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All of the darkness of the world cannot put out the light of one small candle.\"

Offline Leah

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Pure aka http://www.helpyourteens.com? Good idea or bad idea
« Reply #7 on: March 05, 2003, 04:30:00 PM »
When searching for a program for my child, I contacted PURE.  What I found out was that yes, the service is free.  
The catch~~  They ONLY refer to programs that pay them $$ for each kid that admits.  I found out anywhere from $400 to $2000 per kid.  
How can they make impartial suggestions, with the child and family in mind, if they only send them to a paying program.  Seems warped to me.
After checking into the programs they told me about, only 1 seemed even remotely close to helping my son.  I did NOT choose any of their programs.
There has got to be someplace (Ed Con. or referral service) where the fee is inexpensive, service is good and the suggestions impartial.  
Since my neighbors and friends know that my son went to a wilderness program, I keep getting calls from folks that want help.  I don't have anywhere to send them too.  Any suggestions? :question:  :question:
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Offline FaceKhan

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« Reply #8 on: March 06, 2003, 01:56:00 PM »
Unfortunately few if any of these fad programs are anything more than frauds, scams and cults. None of them are proven effective, and most are mainly in it for the money. Non-profit does not mean that no one is profiting from it.

If someone asks just tell them that these programs are useless at best and dangerously abusive at worst, and that they should stick to traditional therapy.

When it comes to educational consultants, I don't think they should accept money from anyone but the parents themselves. If the parents can't afford to pay for the consultant, I doubt they can afford any of these high priced programs either. When they take referral fees or have specific program affiliations then that is a conflict of interest that is just not acceptable.


PURE, while it may be rabidly anti-WWASP which is certainly a plus for them, is disconcerting to me and represents yet another attempt for a kinder gentler abusive program industry.

The problem is that parents and facility operators, almost none of which have the qualification to diagnose addiction, or psychological problems can just lock a kid up indefinitely. What really needs to change is that juveniles need the right to a committment hearing before being forced into any mental health facility or long term "therapy".
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
All of the darkness of the world cannot put out the light of one small candle.\"

Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #9 on: March 06, 2003, 03:10:00 PM »
I spent about 18 months in one of these "boot-camps" ages 13-15, outside of Palestine Tx. Out in the friggin' middle of the woods! Same principle, a back to basics theme, 'Behavior Modification' for troubled teens. No privacy. At night when we were confined to our tents after dark, we shared 1 pot on a stump for #1 and #2.(shitting and pissing) We had chore charts, and we all rotated daily so everyone got a chance to clean those.  What's with these places? I believe this one is still open, almost 20 years later. The intakes were sectioned off into tribes( age grouping). There was more expectation of hard labor ie; cutting down and scinning trees to build the structures we lived in, digging a 6ft. hole in the ground then building a toilet on top and supplying us with lie powder to dump down after we went to kill the maggots!!! Long hikes, carrying loads of laundry or supplies...for 18 months. We would be taken by buses back home for 2 days a month. In between my stay there, my mom found out my step- brother had been raping me. I stayed. My step dad became termially ill with cancer. I stayed. You didn't go in phases you were just recognized by time. He died shortly after I was released. My real dad died about 9 months before I was sent there, in 1984. Before then is another post altogether.
After that one failed with me, my mom sent me to Straight inc. I turned 16 and 17 in there. I missed all the fundamental and school years, I didnt have the confidence to even try college after Straight. The mental dammage is the worst, by the time you are telling anyone you're nuts. Embarking apon years of therapy can be frustrating and fruitless, it's up to me to find what works now. That's a blessing alone.
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Offline ehm

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« Reply #10 on: March 06, 2003, 03:19:00 PM »
I posted, BOOT CAMPS. Forgot to sign in. :smile:
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Offline kel78

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« Reply #11 on: May 21, 2003, 04:33:00 PM »
Has to agree with Khan on that one.  I could go through and even though I'm not a teenager anymore, I recognized lots of those things in me.  It's kind of frustrating that kids can't just be, that everything has to be a problem that needs fixed.  Sometimes, it just seems like another excuse to try and make a profit off someone else's problems.  

My first post... has been just reading for a while... this just struck me as sort of how I got in my situation, and so many others that I know and have spoken to
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #12 on: August 06, 2003, 08:53:00 PM »
Got this off the Teen Help Industry Site;  FYI - VERY, VERY interesting reading.  Parents Beware - read this before calling this place!

http://www.purerebuttal.com/
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