I don't know why our numbers of drugs-, booze-, DUI- related deaths and even teenage pregnacies are so low, but I think that it has something to do with that it is very difficult to live a secret life in Denmark.
Every child is watched by the authorities from day one. Because more than 90 percent of the children have attended either nusery of kindergarten and home schooling is very rare, so you can say that we in fact parent each other.
If I spot a drunken co-worker on his way to his car, his carkeys will be missing in a instant and I could be to blame. I would properly even drive him down to the bus- or train-station, because I know that all the works done in my firm is important for me. With no salespersons or people in the accounting there is no work for me.
If a person in my department do have a problem with drugs or alcohol, I will put my foot in and ask them to take care of their problem, if they want to continue to work in my department. My bosses will do the same with me. When we had a serious illness in my household, they asked me to go home and sleep when I looked too tired. They know that I am a workaholic and that I would not change it, so they live with it and steps in from time to time, so I stay alive.
And it is easy to get help. In my country every person can go down to the city hall and get help. But they have ask. None will use good taxpayers money to help a person, who doesn't want help.
The same goes for our teenagers. They are educated to solve conflicts from day one. A kind of rap-groups are conducted in public schools. One hour every week is called "the hour of the class". During this hour they speak about issues that could prevent the class to function in the best possible way as a team. If there are conflict
we use a Norwegian system to descale conflicts. It is called Step-by-step where every student from grade 0 are taught how to make the conflict step up and step down from the degree of violence.
This work started 10 years ago where we had our sofar only shooting at a school by a student shut out from the common community. There are no a single public school, which have anti-bullying programs. There are not a single class, which have not rules about respecting each other and our differences.
Alcohol consumption also has it unwritten rules. Once they are 16 they can buy alcohol on their own. Until then we have made rules among the parents. No parties with alcohol unless all the parents agree and then all are informed where and when they take place, so they can drop in and educate their children in the use of alcohol. It is our culture. It is not just emptying a bottle of whiskey. Certain food goes with certain alcohol and it can be quite a quantity people can consume during a evening, but it is done over a lot of hours.
We want to be a part of our childrens lives and if it means to get to a party zone all night without drinking alcohol because we are in duty as a
Night Owl or just commonly concerned about our off-spring, that is what we have to do.
It is somehow a matter about what you will pay taxes to: If I want to I can ask for a Supernanny to coach me in parenting. If you feel that I can not connect to my child, I can ask for an educated senior citizen to become mentor for my child. All that I get acces to because I pay my taxes (40 percent of my income).
As a part of my job I met with such a mentor last week. She was happy about one of her clients quitting her smoking habbits, but she hoped that she also could achieve that her client also would quit the use of pot one day. There is no force involved, only talk and listening. As the bold guy said: "You can only change, what you acknowledge as a problem".
I hope that explains a little more about our in some way odd country.
