Perhaps 'tis me, perhaps 'tis not,
but it fits in so well with the tall tale told,
that it assuredly begs for inclusion!
Ye can call me:
O Chef of the Future
A petrified Ralph watches Norton breeze through a can opening demonstration.Ralph believes he finally has found his perfect get-rich-quick scheme. He bought a product from someone at the Bus Depot, which is an all-in-one kitchen utensil: it slices, it dices, it opens cans. Actually, he didn't buy just one - he bought the whole box the man was selling, a 1,000 of them. His plan is to go on Late Night TV, place an ad for the utensils, and get rich from the profits. Alice, as usual, is very skeptical and refuses to have any part of this whatsoever, but Ralph is determined to prove her wrong.
Teaming up with Norton, Ralph and Norton go over the commercial they're going to make themselves. Norton would greet everyone "out there in TV land", and complain about needing so much time to do simple tasks. Ralph would then come in from a side door, announcing himself as "The chef of the future." Ralph would show how the same tasks Norton does can be done so much quicker with their utensil.
Norton: Tell me, O Chef of the Future, can it core a [sic] apple?
Ralph: Ooh, it can core an apple.
Norton: I wish that someone would invent a household utensil that would do the work of all of these... am I coming through out there?
Ralph: $2,000, Alice, that's big, big, big! This is probably the biggest thing I ever got into.
Alice: The biggest thing you ever got into was your pants.
Norton: If my wife Trixie is watching this and when I come home she says, "I told you so," I'm gonna belt her right in the mouth!
Ralph: (to Norton) I wish you'd stop talking like that, nervous. You're gonna get yourself all Norton.
Ralph: Nobody's 100%, Alice.
Alice: You are. You've been wrong every time.[/list]
