Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > The Ridge Creek School / Hidden Lake Academy
Sex occurs on campus
PostGradParent:
--- Quote from: ""Guest"" ---
--- Quote from: ""Guest"" --- Do you have a problem with kids telling an authority figure that their friend is in a sexual relationship or is doing drugs?
--- End quote ---
damn i just came to realize we have some genuinely conservative confomative backwards-thinking nieve people on this site. then again this country is full of this scum. i dont understand, why must your children suffer locked up in an institution? why must your child be punished for your own mistakes and bigotry? did it ever come to you that maybe SEX AND DRUGS ARE NOT THE PROBLEM! you are the problem. they are an intrinsic part of humanity as a whole, and their opression only brings about grief. a kid who is doing drugs is not a bad kid, they are just curious. but, it is up to you as a parent to know where to draw the line, and understand the difference between various patterns and habits.
some HLAesque examples you might be able to relate to:
a kid who smokes weed every day but gets good grades. He doesnt get along with his parents, but has stable freindships. He doesnt get into trouble, although his freinds seem shady. his parents are worried.
this kid is a pothead. yet, is that a bad thing? although he partakes in questionably legal activity, he is still fullfilling his responsibilities. maybe he doesnt get along with his parents becouse they dont approve of their lifestyle. so, there starts "the war that never was". maybe a simple blind eye here or there by the parents will IMPROVE the relationship, and keep him from making stupid desicions.
a kid smokes weed every day, sits around, does nothing, skips school, etc. also does hard drugs like cocaine, heroin, or methamphetamine.
this is where you must draw the line. it is at THIS point that kids need help.
a girl is 15 years old and is dating a 17 year old. they have sex regularly. the parents of the girl dont approve of the relationship, regardless of reasoning, even though they seem to be in love.
the parents need to grow up. and maybe change their church or something.
a girl is 14 and sleeps around. she dates guys up to a decade older. she gets drunk alot, and lets anyone take advantage of her.
when this happens 90% of the time it's becouse the parents are in a dysfunctional relationship themselves. the other 10% is becouse the girl is hitting puberty and her raging horomones are making her too horny to control. hey, some people are meant to be pornstars!
bigots, take a fucking look at yourselves and grow a backbone. and some self honesty would help, since i cant give you people the harder truth. i can only estimate.
--- End quote ---
Your inappropriate foul language and name calling turn me off. I think you're full of yourself.
Troll Control:
Tell him again! Maybe the FOURTH time will be a charm.
Seriously, lady, you need to be able to sort through the rhetoric and see the points for what they're worth. It is this type of blanket dismissal of this kid based on how he expresses himself that shows where parents need to improve. 90% of what this kid says is accurate, yet you dismiss it because of your being uptight about language.
It's not okay to lock up an otherwise normal kid in an institution just because he says "fuck you" to you a lot. Yet this is exactly the profile of most of HLA's institutionalized population and it's due to parents' getting their panties in a bunch over relatively minor things...
Anonymous:
Guest wrote:
--- Quote ---some HLAesque examples you might be able to relate to:
a kid who smokes weed every day but gets good grades. He doesnt get along with his parents, but has stable freindships. He doesnt get into trouble, although his freinds seem shady. his parents are worried.
this kid is a pothead. yet, is that a bad thing? although he partakes in questionably legal activity, he is still fullfilling his responsibilities. maybe he doesnt get along with his parents becouse they dont approve of their lifestyle. so, there starts "the war that never was". maybe a simple blind eye here or there by the parents will IMPROVE the relationship, and keep him from making stupid desicions.
a kid smokes weed every day, sits around, does nothing, skips school, etc. also does hard drugs like cocaine, heroin, or methamphetamine.
this is where you must draw the line. it is at THIS point that kids need help.
--- End quote ---
Okay -- let's take that second kid. What do parents do? The kid needs help, as you say. Assume further that some unsuccessful attempt has been made to provide help at home. Are parents to wait until the kid further harms him or herself and requires a locked facility, is targeted as a truant, and/or is picked up by the juvenile officials for drug use, drug sale, or criminal activity to support drug purchase?
The assumption that parents send their kids to a therapeutic boarding school to get rid of them and their rudeness doesn't seem to apply here. Perhaps there are indeed parents who will spend huge sums of money to get peace and quiet at home. For most parents, however, that's money that needs to be borrowed or diverted from other things that they would much rather do. I just have to believe that people are going to be pretty desperate for help before they take this kind of step. And Guest, at least, agreed that the second kid mentioned really does need help -- it's not just a situation of someone involved in recreational drug use who is otherwise functioning well.
Without offering any defense of HLA, which has its flaws, I'd like to know what those who condemn parents for taking these steps would suggest?
Troll Control:
This topic has been parsed again and again here. Obviously, local solutions are available. If the kid requires institutionalization, then s/he must meet the following criteria:
1. Is an imminent danger to self (will kill self).
2. Is an imminent danger to others (will kill others).
3. Is unable mentally to function in any other environment.
It's really that simple.
There's a thread in the Troubled Teen Industry forum called "What quality care looks like". I suggest you read that.
Institutionalization of your kid is not a solution.
Anonymous:
Quote:
I am glad that there were some students that were willing to do the more difficult thing and tell on their freinds who were making bad choices. I think it is a sign of true friendship. Do you have a problem with kids telling an authority figure that their friend is in a sexual relationship or is doing drugs?
My child was forced to do the Fall-out book. My child did as told. For
that, my child was threatened by two other violent children. My child lived in fear. Yet when something was reported such as suicidal thoughts or my child stayed up night after night counseling other children to prevent them from sliting their wrists, it was upon deaf ears. A chronic Bulemic child was also counseled by my child and my childs' concerns were ignored. Those instances should be reported. However, their is a code of ethics that hopefully most children were brought up with. THerefore, if one is in fear for someone's well being, then seek help. Otherwise,
work on oneself before casting stones or judgement. What HLA has done,
is to create retaliation and break any bond that the children may have with each other...including honour.
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