Why was Mansfield's Family Eating on Campus?

[Anonymous]

Regarding HLA, I think parents perspective and outlooks were formed by how they were treated by HLA along with their children. I have said before that I believe the parents that have a good outlook and perspective of HLA were the ones with fairly compliant children whose parents just nodded yes to every piece of information and recommendation they were given by HLA. Some of us really wanted to believe in HLA and have a positive outlook, but were jerked around by the HLA administration and promised so many things that never happened. It is hard to have a positive outlook when you are paying out that kind of money and at the same time being treated like crap by HLA. Bad treatment and bad experience by HLA equals bad outlook and perspective.

[RobertBruce]

It doesn't need justifying.  HLA does not have to run every policy by the parents.  The parents are not share holders, they are customers.  If HLA wants to allow families to eat on campus that is their business.  On the occasions that I ran into HLA parents in the dining hall and had my family there, the parents thought it was wonderful that my family was there.  That is one of the interesting things about working in a place like HLA.  What some families see as a great thing, other families see as a bad thing.  I guess it depends on your perspective and outlook.

Parents very very seldom ever ate in the lodge. Youre painting a picture that would suggest that not only does this occur often, but when it does parents are always okay with it. Nothing could be further from the truth. As to not needing justifying, so it's your argument that even though the parents are the ones who are paying for the food to be placed on the table, they have no say so in how things are done? Gee, with such solid business practices its a wonder you guys are having so many problems over there. This of course the same mentality we saw with the strip searching policy. HLA staff never actively disclosed that little factoid to parents because apparently paying six grand a month doesnt garruntee being told what it is your paying for.

So again lap dog, justify this policy for me.

[HLA Truth]

All I can say is that in MY experience I never had a parent express anything but pleasure over the fact that me or my family were on campus eating, or doing anything else, that was interacting with the students.  You are right that it was rare that parents ate in the dining hall, but there were often parents coming through there on tours while we ate.  The admission people would often point out that families come on campus to eat with the student body as a selling point to the parents.  I am actually surprised that folks on this site are not saying that HLA allowed it to happen in order to manipulate families into thinking it was a family atmosphere.

[Troll Control]

So, was it a manipulation?

[Anonymous]

Screw the eating in the Lodge thing. Are you trying to say that HLA administration members that lead those "parent workshop brainwashing sessions" and not master manipulators? Please do no insult our intelligence here. They tell you that your child will regress if you pull them out of HLA early to try and manipulate parents into keeping their children there. Parents believe what they want to believe based on their level of denial and fear.  HLA talks about the "Harder Truth". Any parent with any analytical skills can see straight through that Con job and see the real Harder truth. People with psychology backgrounds should know that you will not get a positive outcome with a student by keeping them in such a negative and very unhealthy environment all the time.

[Anonymous]

Screw the eating in the Lodge thing. Are you trying to say that HLA administration members that lead those "parent workshop brainwashing sessions" and not master manipulators? Please do no insult our intelligence here. They tell you that your child will regress if you pull them out of HLA early to try and manipulate parents into keeping their children there. Parents believe what they want to believe based on their level of denial and fear.  HLA talks about the "Harder Truth". Any parent with any analytical skills can see straight through that Con job and see the real Harder truth. People with psychology backgrounds should know that you will not get a positive outcome with a student by keeping them in such a negative and very unhealthy environment all the time.

The workshops are carefully scripted to project the message that Len Wants to get out there, which is STAY STAY STAY.  Jeff worked very hard to twist the workshops and make them consistantly tug on the heartstrings of the parents.  Any diverson from the script was handled very harshly from either a staff or a parent.

Cates routninely was crucified by Len for deviating.

Cates was not allowed to make any decisions, we remember the time he tried to solve a problem around a student leaving the program and granting grades. Len wanted to fire him on the spot but did not trust that JEFF could handle the role.


as far as for staff eating , it was proposed several times to charge staff, especially after the retreat brainstorming sessions. HE always said no but then would run up personal catering charges with SAGE of tens of thousands of dollars.  Those private christmas parties in Atlanta catered by SAGE were very expensive, especially for the GAY PARTY!!.

[Anonymous]

I agree about the whole Parent Workshop Voodoo Sessions. They truly played on parents' fears and vunerabilities.

On another note - how many other parents had to send down basic school supplies to their child because HLA didn't provide pens, pencils, hi-liters, etc? Couldn't you cough up a lousy #2 leaded pencil for $6K a month?

[Anonymous]

Amen to that. I had to buy school supplies over and over. My kid did not even have her own textbook in some classes. They had to borrow a textbook to do some work. For that price, every child should have their own supplies and textbook for every class.

[PostGradParent]

It is one of the perks that HLA affords to its employees.  Staff bring there families to eat and at the same time interact with the HLA kids.  My kids enjoyed eating on campus and getting to know the HLA students.  In turn, the HLA kids enjoyed playing with my children.

It infuriates me to learn that HLA feeds not only its staff, but its staffs' families, at the expense of the parents.  If you're reading this, imagine YOUR employer feeding YOU everyday, AND your family members, at no expense to you.  Absurd.

[Anonymous]

Just a difference of opinion I guess.  I think it is a good thing that staff who live on campus eat with their families in the dining hall at times.  I think it is great that staff would want to intergrate their families into the lives of the students.  I have no problem with it.  I would not want staff members who see their job as strictly nine to five, eight hours a day.  The reality is that their have been  many staff who pour thier heart into the job.  If they eat a few meals with their families while hanging out with the students, then fine by me.

[PostGradParent]

It doesn't need justifying.  HLA does not have to run every policy by the parents.  The parents are not share holders, they are customers.  If HLA wants to allow families to eat on campus that is their business.  On the occasions that I ran into HLA parents in the dining hall and had my family there, the parents thought it was wonderful that my family was there.  That is one of the interesting things about working in a place like HLA.  What some families see as a great thing, other families see as a bad thing.  I guess it depends on your perspective and outlook.

If you were a PARENT paying tuition for YOUR child's recovery, I venture to guess you would feel much differently about a portion of YOUR hard earned dollar being spent feeding staff members' families.

[Anonymous]

No, I wouldn't.  I would be glad that staff were there cultivating relationships with my child.  I would be glad that they care enough about my child to include their family in my child's life.  I would glad they saw their position as more than just a job.  I would actually be asking why more staff members don't spend time eating with my kid.

[Anonymous]

That is right. If you want to bring your family to HLA for dinner to mingle with the students, than pay for you and your families meals and then mingle away!

[Anonymous]

No, I wouldn't.  I would be glad that staff were there cultivating relationships with my child.  I would be glad that they care enough about my child to include their family in my child's life.  I would glad they saw their position as more than just a job.  I would actually be asking why more staff members don't spend time eating with my kid.

You are obviously a STAFF member and NOT a parent paying tuition.

You should have been sitting with our children and eating a meal with our children because you actually CARED about our children and it should have been part of your job to be CARING and NUTURING. HLA is supposed to be a "Therapeutic Boaring School", right? I don't give a damn if your family eats their, but not on my dime.

[Anonymous]

Wow.  You are upset about a staff member who cares enough to bring his family to the dining hall to spend time with your child.  You are upset that it is on "your dime".  Wow.  Maybe if you cared as much about raising your child appropriately as you do about "your dime" your child would not be in a therapeutic boarding school.  

I'm done with this subject.  Get in your last word.  I won't respond.