Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > Lighthouse of northwest florida (fka VCA )/ Rebekah / Roloff )
Lester Roloffs Rebekah Home for Girls Survivors-Cult-mindcon
Anonymous:
lies? it's not us telling the lies here.
wrathfulhoof1:
NO SHE DOESNT LIE!!!! I TOO AM A SURVIVOR OF THE ROLOFF HOMES!!! I am a former roloff attendee. I can vouch for most of the stories that have happened and can add many more since i was a particpant from anchrtraz from 82-85
eric
hoof to those that know me
notworking:
--- Quote ---On 2004-04-06 14:58:00, Melanie wrote:
Memories from children, true or false? Who's to know?
--- End quote ---
This thinking has led to a tremendous amount of harm in the world. Children abused by teachers, priests, ministers, youth counselors because "children don't know what they're saying, they can't distinguish fantasy from reality." It's a crock. Stories of being abused are inherently humiliating to tell. Why would SO MANY people bring this up if it didn't happen? People who didn't see it might have done just that -- NOT SEEN IT. Or they may have an agenda -- look at the poster who wanted to know someone's name so she could REPORT them, for heaven's sake.
--- Quote ---Well, one thing is for sure, I would have hated it till the end had I not accepted the LORD to live inside my heart. It made ALL the difference in the world.
--- End quote ---
The Lord gives us the strength to get through anything if we open ourselves to Him. The fact that you experienced His grace at Rebekah doesn't meant that it was a good place. Many people experienced God's grace in concentration camps -- Corrie TenBoom made a living writing and speaking about it. That doesn't mean they weren't evil.
--- Quote ---It IS nessasary to start over fresh every day. It feels good to wipe the slate clean before going to bed at night.
The same is true to let the past stay where it is, in the past.
--- End quote ---
NO. You do not wipe the slate clean every night. Confession and forgiveness are necessary, but not sufficient to salvation. You must SIN NO MORE. Abusing children is a sin. Although I don't agree with him about everything, Pope John Paul II was right when he said it was one of the most grievous sins a person could commit. It doesn't matter how many times you confess and beg for forgiveness, even mean it, if you go back to that sin again and again and again. Intimidating other people, trying to avoid the consequences of your actions, those are sins, too. Even if you stop abusing children, you have an obligation to admit what you did so that the people you abused can get the help and closure they need.
--- Quote ---
First of all, I too didn't have a period for the entire year I lived at the Rebekah Home. I think this happened because our life styles had changed so dramatically and our hormones where affected from this. Also, most of the food that was prepared for us to consume, were very healthy and good for us. Though, I do remember a lot of starchy foods as well, which is full of carbs, and explains why so many of us gained tons of weight. Too much weight gain or loss, can affect a womans/girls cycle. I for one was quite happy for not having to deal with having a period for a year. Who wouldn't be?
--- End quote ---
Well, an OB/Gyn wouldn't be, for starters. What you're describing is called amenorrhea, a medical condition. Weight gain or loss can cause you to skip a period or two, but not for a whole year. That's a sign of something more troubling. Either you were being fed hormones OR you were stressed to the point that your bodies were constantly flooded with adrenalin. Women fleeing war or living in refugee camps often don't have periods because losing blood/carrying a baby could kill them. Otherwise, if you go to the doctor and say "I haven't had a period in a year," s/he's gonna be concerned.
--- Quote ---
YES, THERE WAS A LOCK UP ROOM.
I spent a week in lock up and I had wackings on my be-hind a few times. Of course it hurt. I think that was the point, but I did not bleed or bruise. I pay attention to detail. Knowing this, it is hard for me to imagine true "abuse" exsisting in that Home. I think I would've noticed. Others would have told me. Wouldn't they?
--- End quote ---
Striking a child with an object is abuse, period. Do it more than once and your child will be removed from your home in most states. Striking teenagers is not only abusive physically, but mentally as well. Plus it's stupid. Teenagers may be motivated by humiliation and pain in the short term, but in the long run you get resentment. If you couldn't recognize that you were being abused, why would you have recognized it happening to someone else?
--- Quote ---< The tub didn't work, and I wanted to bathe. That was gross in itself. And, I heard later, that roaches lived in the room and came out at night where we'd sleep on the floor with a single mattress. Yuck. Yuck...There were no windows either. And, when I would sing out loud, (cause I do), "worldly" things, such as singing popular songs, the lights would be turned off. I had no control over the lights at all.
--- End quote ---
Again, this is abuse. Do it to your kids and you'll lose them and (hopefully) go to jail. Even in the 80s, if you locked your kid in a filthy room with no windows on a single mattress and turned out the lights when the kid tried to comfort himself by singing, you would have had to explain it to a judge.
It is good that you've made peace with your experience. But others can't. And when you invalidate their experiences -- waxing rhapsodic about fresh oranges and tanning -- you turn them away. Did you ever think that maybe some girls from Rebekah came to associate their treatment there with God and decided to have nothing more to do with Him? Do you think Christ would have approved of these methods? Anything that stands between people and salvation is just plain wrong, no matter how well intentioned it may be.
Melanie:
Hello "Familiar Face",
I wish to respond to the post above.....
Thank you for your acknowledgment and your comments regarding my posting~
You must first know, I am NOT an advocate of child abuse, or abuse of any kind. It is in my nature to protect those who are suffering. It is a passion that lives deep inside of me, and it will never leave me~
Though, you have made me aware, that I too, lived through a form of abuse. I am becoming more and more aware of the abuse and suffering, of others, particularly, those from the Roloff Homes. I myself do not come from a physically abusive home. I apologize that I am slow to learn in this area. I do, however, come from a mental abusive up bringing. So, at least I can try to comprehend the "mind" part of all of this. Bare with me as I learn more, please.
My way of "thinking", as I posted, "God knows", was an attempt to help bring others peace in their mind, to remind them that they are not alone. Another words, He knows the whole truth(s). He will bring out in the light, which was once in the dark.
I NEVER implied that people are/were lying. I believe everyones story. Why wouldn't I? The Homes were in operation for thirty-something years. Many different people ran the Homes over the span of many years. Some "good", some, "bad", so how could I or you, ever not believe what others proclaim? Most of us only lived there for a few years, or less. It would be nonsense to try to speak on behalf of others who lived at the Homes in different times. And, once again, this is common sense.
Furthermore, I never said it was a "good place", nor a "bad place". It was neither to me. But, that was MY experience, not necessarily yours. And, I respect that~ Also, it would be nice if those who were "abused", could find it in thier hearts, to respect those who do not have the same awfull memories. For, neither the abused nor the non abused, are to blame... We were children, remember that~
You have said good and interesting things in your posting, I am glad that you spoke up. That is what this is all about, after all~
I too admire the teachings of Corrie Ten Boom. I have a wonderful devotional book by her. It is called, "Each New Day",in case you would like to check it out. We can never begin to understand, the sufferings that she had to endure, or all of the souls murdered in the Holocaust. Now that is an issue that really pisses me off.
YES. I do wipe the slate clean every night, and, I always will. There isn't any reason to get so deep in this area. It is a generalization. Haven't you ever heard that saying about the sun going down? ( I can't remember it right now), however what you do before you go to bed each night, is your own business. I will respect that too~
You are right! Every one has the "obligation', to ask forgiveness to those they've/we've harmed, and closure is VERY important. Everyday~
I stand corrected on the OB/GYN issue. Though, as an adult, when ever I had gained extra weight in the past, this would happen to me, like it did in the Home. I assumed it was "the" cause. I was wrong, and "thank you", for that info. I wonder if "Amenorrhea", has something to do with the fact that my husband and I haven't conceived a baby yet. But, thats another sad issue that perhaps, I'll have to overcome too~
I do wonder if any of the abused people are doing anything about there past abuse now. Who would one go to talk to? Do you have any sugestions???Have any of you pressed charges? I probably would have, (if I personally had a reason to), but, I would have done it a long time ago~ then again, thats just me~
I can assure you, that if I had ever witnessed anything alarming, anything at all, I would not have kept it to myself. No way man~
Others CAN make peace with their past experiences, and they must, or else, they will fade away for sure, and wake up to be little old men and women with a scrunched up grumpy face. Not good~~
All through the ages, people of "faith", have had to suffer greatly. I don't know why, do you? But, there must be a reason for it. Once we get over "this" thing, there will be another "thing"...Thats LIFE....THATS LIFE..Most of our answers, are right in front of us sometimes, and we don't choose to recognize them~At least, that has been my experience.
By the way, I still love oranges, swings, sunshine, and rock and roll~ and for these simple pleasures that God gave me to "survive with", I do not feel the need to apologize~
Thanks again Familar face. You have so much passion, perhaps you can do a lot of good in the world with it~ You go girl!
Melanie
[ This Message was edited by: Melanie on 2004-04-26 05:20 ][ This Message was edited by: Melanie on 2004-04-27 12:20 ]
nett:
i was there in 79 -80 and seen none of what you are saying
Any Irishman who doubts the reality of selective enforcement ought to take just a moment to comtemplate the etymology of the term "paddy waggon".
--Antigen
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