Author Topic: Requesting Parents' Assessment of Hyde School  (Read 32187 times)

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Offline Anonymous

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Requesting Parents' Assessment of Hyde School
« Reply #15 on: January 18, 2007, 07:13:25 AM »
Quote from: ""Guest""
You can e mail me ([email protected]) or google THE JEKYLL SIDE OF HYDE to find the report I wrote on my experience at Hyde.

Gary


  hey,

 Robert Louis Stevenson reference.  Original. You are a gifted writer, seriously,  Joe may be right about you though.  Have you ever concidered that?  Just because you hear something about yourself from a bi-polar meglomaniac does not mean it is not true.
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Offline Anonymous

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Requesting Parents' Assessment of Hyde School
« Reply #16 on: January 18, 2007, 07:54:44 AM »
Quote from: ""Guest""
Quote from: ""Guest""
You can e mail me ([email protected]) or google THE JEKYLL SIDE OF HYDE to find the report I wrote on my experience at Hyde.

Gary

  hey,

 Robert Louis Stevenson reference.  Original. You are a gifted writer, seriously,  Joe may be right about you though.  Have you ever concidered that?  Just because you hear something about yourself from a bi-polar meglomaniac does not mean it is not true.


Thoughtful comment and absolutely true.  Joe clearly has insight on some issues, and his snapshot judgments about me were scoured for truth, no doubt- and I've continued to grow, and change, since writing this piece.  No problem with head on challenges!  In my judgment, however, there is absolutely no excuse for bad behavior, or throwing people out of a program they've paid for in advance- not even being right.

garyeskow.com
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Offline Anonymous

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Requesting Parents' Assessment of Hyde School
« Reply #17 on: January 18, 2007, 01:41:13 PM »
Gary, I just want to say how much I appreciate your having the independent spirit, not to mention the balls, for posting your story on ISAC as well as coming onto this site and posting your thoughts and commentary.  I have read your posts in the past and have always enjoyed them.  Thank you, from someone who sadly feels they must still stay anon...
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Offline Anonymous

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Requesting Parents' Assessment of Hyde School
« Reply #18 on: January 18, 2007, 02:28:12 PM »
Quote from: ""Guest""
Quote from: ""Guest""
Quote from: ""Guest""
You can e mail me ([email protected]) or google THE JEKYLL SIDE OF HYDE to find the report I wrote on my experience at Hyde.

Gary

  hey,

 Robert Louis Stevenson reference.  Original. You are a gifted writer, seriously,  Joe may be right about you though.  Have you ever concidered that?  Just because you hear something about yourself from a bi-polar meglomaniac does not mean it is not true.

Thoughtful comment and absolutely true.  Joe clearly has insight on some issues, and his snapshot judgments about me were scoured for truth, no doubt- and I've continued to grow, and change, since writing this piece.  No problem with head on challenges!  In my judgment, however, there is absolutely no excuse for bad behavior, or throwing people out of a program they've paid for in advance- not even being right.

garyeskow.com


Gary: I too deeply appreciate your willingness to share your observations about your Hyde experiences.  I especially appreciate your willingness to post your "story" on the ISAC website.  This is likely to be very helpful to lots of us, especially parents who are considering Hyde.

I am troubled by the comment that someone else posted here in response to your message: "Robert Louis Stevenson reference.  Original. You are a gifted writer, seriously,  Joe may be right about you though.  Have you ever concidered that?  Just because you hear something about yourself from a bi-polar meglomaniac does not mean it is not true."

The person who posted this certainly has a right to raise the issue about the possibilty that there's some "truth" embedded in Hyde administrators' feedback to you.  However, I find the tone of this comment to be unnecessarily sanctimonious and provocative, qualities that I have found to be all too pervasive at Hyde.  (That's a big reason we've decided to leave Hyde.)

I too, regrettably, need to remain anonymous at this point.  Our family is thinking about the most appropriate next steps with regard to our extraordinarily negative Hyde experience.
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Offline gary eskow

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Requesting Parents' Assessment of Hyde School
« Reply #19 on: January 18, 2007, 05:54:45 PM »
I can't tell you how much it means to me that you folks took the time to read my story, and have responded with such kind words.

I hold no rancarous feelings towards anyone connected with Hyde, including that buffoon-ish, but somehow admirabl guy, Joe Gauld.

Funny, I called Mike Dawes- who I like so much and have enjoyed such a respectful relationship with- to wish him a happy holiday, and he could, it seemed to me, barely tolerate a cordial conversation.  So much for truth before harmony! Mike, I love ya!

Our son, by the way, just completed his first semester at Hofstra with all A's and B's, although he still parties too much for my taste.
Tonight, his mom's out for dinner with her sis, and so he asked me for $10 for dinner, which I gave it to him- with the qualifier that he tell me I'm the best dad ever... fortunately, he gets my sense of humor.  Wish Joe G. had been blessed with one!

peace,

G
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Offline gary eskow

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« Reply #20 on: January 18, 2007, 05:54:57 PM »
I can't tell you how much it means to me that you folks took the time to read my story, and have responded with such kind words.

I hold no rancarous feelings towards anyone connected with Hyde, including that buffoon-ish, but somehow admirabl guy, Joe Gauld.

Funny, I called Mike Dawes- who I like so much and have enjoyed such a respectful relationship with- to wish him a happy holiday, and he could, it seemed to me, barely tolerate a cordial conversation.  So much for truth before harmony! Mike, I love ya!

Our son, by the way, just completed his first semester at Hofstra with all A's and B's, although he still parties too much for my taste.
Tonight, his mom's out for dinner with her sis, and so he asked me for $10 for dinner, which I gave it to him- with the qualifier that he tell me I'm the best dad ever... fortunately, he gets my sense of humor.  Wish Joe G. had been blessed with one!

peace,

G
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Offline Anonymous

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Re: Requesting Parents' Assessment of Hyde School
« Reply #21 on: January 19, 2007, 12:56:56 AM »
Quote from: ""Guest""
Quote from: ""Guest""
This morning I have spent time trying to locate information about the Hyde School.  I found this web site pretty quickly by doing a Google search.  Most of the comments I read here are very troubling.  When I read Hyde's official material I got the impression that the school focuses heavily on values and character.  Reading this web site, however, I'm beginning to get a very different, and troubling, picture of Hyde.  Many of the comments I read on this site suggest that there's a disturbing side to Hyde and that many people have had very negative experiences (not everyone, it appears, but many).  Many people who post here seem to be troubled especially by the school's founder, Joe Gauld, along with some other Hyde staff.

I am very eager for more information, especially current information, about what kind of school Hyde REALLY is, the positive and negative.  I would appreciate it if people would post serious comments.  (I prefer to avoid the sillier and more juvenile comments.)  

Thank you.

I encourage any parent who is considering Hyde for their child to ask some hard, pointed questions about the school.  I STRONGLY recommend that you avoid taking the school's publications and admissions rhetoric at face value.  Hyde is a very controversial school run by very controversial people.  You will find some families that like Hyde and, I guarantee you, many families that are horrified by what they've experienced at Hyde.

I think you should seek out people who have been at Hyde for some time, including those who like the school and those who don't.  Ask probing questions about the use of intimidation tactics, requirements to self-disclose on group meetings (parents and students), the quality of mental health staff and services (I don't think there are any), the academic qualifications of the teachers, the number of people who leave Hyde every year, enrollment trends, the number of Hyde graduates who actually finish (not start) college, the influence of Joe Gauld.

This is the information I wish I'd known.



I ditto that. I also wish I had known. :"(
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Offline Anonymous

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Requesting Parents' Assessment of Hyde School
« Reply #22 on: January 19, 2007, 11:25:22 AM »
Quote from: ""gary eskow""
I can't tell you how much it means to me that you folks took the time to read my story, and have responded with such kind words.

I hold no rancarous feelings towards anyone connected with Hyde, including that buffoon-ish, but somehow admirabl guy, Joe Gauld.

Funny, I called Mike Dawes- who I like so much and have enjoyed such a respectful relationship with- to wish him a happy holiday, and he could, it seemed to me, barely tolerate a cordial conversation.  So much for truth before harmony! Mike, I love ya!

Our son, by the way, just completed his first semester at Hofstra with all A's and B's, although he still parties too much for my taste.
Tonight, his mom's out for dinner with her sis, and so he asked me for $10 for dinner, which I gave it to him- with the qualifier that he tell me I'm the best dad ever... fortunately, he gets my sense of humor.  Wish Joe G. had been blessed with one!

peace,

G


Sanctamounious?  No.  Just a  troll.  Gary handled it with aplumb.

Hal Dahl
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #23 on: January 19, 2007, 04:52:22 PM »
Quote from: ""gary eskow""
I can't tell you how much it means to me that you folks took the time to read my story, and have responded with such kind words.

I hold no rancarous feelings towards anyone connected with Hyde, including that buffoon-ish, but somehow admirabl guy, Joe Gauld.

Funny, I called Mike Dawes- who I like so much and have enjoyed such a respectful relationship with- to wish him a happy holiday, and he could, it seemed to me, barely tolerate a cordial conversation.  So much for truth before harmony! Mike, I love ya!

Our son, by the way, just completed his first semester at Hofstra with all A's and B's, although he still parties too much for my taste.
Tonight, his mom's out for dinner with her sis, and so he asked me for $10 for dinner, which I gave it to him- with the qualifier that he tell me I'm the best dad ever... fortunately, he gets my sense of humor.  Wish Joe G. had been blessed with one!

peace,

G


Gary, have to tell you that no matter what your feelings are about hyde, whether positive or negative, you stand for what Hyde is supposed to be about.  The fact that you are speaking up and not hiding your identity is admirable!  I wish I had as much courage to do so, but I feel that Hyde is vendictive and not really about "truth over harmony" so am concerned about giving my name.  As you see from Mike Dawes, you are either with them or against them.  He is not unlike any of the others.  Hyde probably put pressure on him not to talk to you no matter what kind of relationship you had with him.  Don't forget, these people need their jobs but in the end they are cowards by not standing up for themselves.
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Offline gary eskow

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« Reply #24 on: January 21, 2007, 12:16:24 PM »
Thank you.  There is certainly a cowardly streak in many of the folks who work at Hyde, but I tend to think about their inability to confront Joe more in terms of what appears to be a collectively stunted emotional state.  Duncan, for example, was clearly terrified of challenging Joe.  Judy Fortier- a fundamentally kind hearted and well meaning person- seemed to me to have walled off huge sections of her personality, and sacrificed a positive self image to the worth she derives as a member of the Hyde squad.

But there is good work being done as well there, and somehow there has to be a way to improve Hyde.  The best thing Malcolm and Laura Gauld could do, in my opinion, would be to acknowledge their mistakes and reach out to those they have harmed for advice.  Sounds like Bush in Iraq, though, and probably just as improbable for them to acknowledge the horrific misjudgments they have made!
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #25 on: January 21, 2007, 01:28:59 PM »
Quote from: ""gary eskow""
Thank you.  There is certainly a cowardly streak in many of the folks who work at Hyde, but I tend to think about their inability to confront Joe more in terms of what appears to be a collectively stunted emotional state.  Duncan, for example, was clearly terrified of challenging Joe.  Judy Fortier- a fundamentally kind hearted and well meaning person- seemed to me to have walled off huge sections of her personality, and sacrificed a positive self image to the worth she derives as a member of the Hyde squad.

But there is good work being done as well there, and somehow there has to be a way to improve Hyde.  The best thing Malcolm and Laura Gauld could do, in my opinion, would be to acknowledge their mistakes and reach out to those they have harmed for advice.  Sounds like Bush in Iraq, though, and probably just as improbable for them to acknowledge the horrific misjudgments they have made!


I don't think there's a prayer for Hyde under its current structure.  Joe is much too pathological and intimidating.  As you say, no one is willing to stand up to him and, as a result, the Joe mystique completely taints and pollutes Hyde.  I know lots of people who won't go near Hyde because of Joe and, as well, a number of staff who seem to mimic his arrogance, hubris, impulsiveness, and sadistic tendencies.  You're right that there are a few good people at Hyde; sadly, they are completetly overshadowed by the pathology that surrounds them.
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Offline gary eskow

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« Reply #26 on: January 21, 2007, 02:16:58 PM »
Quote from: ""Guest""
Quote from: ""gary eskow""
Thank you.  There is certainly a cowardly streak in many of the folks who work at Hyde, but I tend to think about their inability to confront Joe more in terms of what appears to be a collectively stunted emotional state.  Duncan, for example, was clearly terrified of challenging Joe.  Judy Fortier- a fundamentally kind hearted and well meaning person- seemed to me to have walled off huge sections of her personality, and sacrificed a positive self image to the worth she derives as a member of the Hyde squad.

But there is good work being done as well there, and somehow there has to be a way to improve Hyde.  The best thing Malcolm and Laura Gauld could do, in my opinion, would be to acknowledge their mistakes and reach out to those they have harmed for advice.  Sounds like Bush in Iraq, though, and probably just as improbable for them to acknowledge the horrific misjudgments they have made!

I don't think there's a prayer for Hyde under its current structure.  Joe is much too pathological and intimidating.  As you say, no one is willing to stand up to him and, as a result, the Joe mystique completely taints and pollutes Hyde.  I know lots of people who won't go near Hyde because of Joe and, as well, a number of staff who seem to mimic his arrogance, hubris, impulsiveness, and sadistic tendencies.  You're right that there are a few good people at Hyde; sadly, they are completetly overshadowed by the pathology that surrounds them.


The realist in me thinks you're probably right, but the optimist hopes the school will lean on its best foot and use the other to kick some ass where that deserves to happen.  I'm not referring to Joe- he's hopeless, and it's clear he's fading away with a very weak sense of self, which is sad.  But the younger, more vital folks who conspire to protect each other rather than honestly examine the institution do need to be kicked in the pants, I think.

The question is this: do disgruntled ex-parents simply want to stay on sites like this and complain to each other, or do they feel strongly enough about what they feel is an abusive environment to take strong, pro-active measures to warn other parents in crisis about Hyde, assuming that the school will not address its core problems?
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #27 on: January 21, 2007, 05:17:02 PM »
I'm afraid an economic hammer is the only way to wield some clout around there.  Perhaps if places such as the William H. Donner Foundation stopped giving them money and their insurance company upped premiums (due their utter lack of action on issues they get sued over), they might deign to lend an ear.
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #28 on: January 21, 2007, 06:11:35 PM »
Quote from: ""gary eskow""
Quote from: ""Guest""
Quote from: ""gary eskow""
Thank you.  There is certainly a cowardly streak in many of the folks who work at Hyde, but I tend to think about their inability to confront Joe more in terms of what appears to be a collectively stunted emotional state.  Duncan, for example, was clearly terrified of challenging Joe.  Judy Fortier- a fundamentally kind hearted and well meaning person- seemed to me to have walled off huge sections of her personality, and sacrificed a positive self image to the worth she derives as a member of the Hyde squad.

But there is good work being done as well there, and somehow there has to be a way to improve Hyde.  The best thing Malcolm and Laura Gauld could do, in my opinion, would be to acknowledge their mistakes and reach out to those they have harmed for advice.  Sounds like Bush in Iraq, though, and probably just as improbable for them to acknowledge the horrific misjudgments they have made!

I don't think there's a prayer for Hyde under its current structure.  Joe is much too pathological and intimidating.  As you say, no one is willing to stand up to him and, as a result, the Joe mystique completely taints and pollutes Hyde.  I know lots of people who won't go near Hyde because of Joe and, as well, a number of staff who seem to mimic his arrogance, hubris, impulsiveness, and sadistic tendencies.  You're right that there are a few good people at Hyde; sadly, they are completetly overshadowed by the pathology that surrounds them.

The realist in me thinks you're probably right, but the optimist hopes the school will lean on its best foot and use the other to kick some ass where that deserves to happen.  I'm not referring to Joe- he's hopeless, and it's clear he's fading away with a very weak sense of self, which is sad.  But the younger, more vital folks who conspire to protect each other rather than honestly examine the institution do need to be kicked in the pants, I think.

The question is this: do disgruntled ex-parents simply want to stay on sites like this and complain to each other, or do they feel strongly enough about what they feel is an abusive environment to take strong, pro-active measures to warn other parents in crisis about Hyde, assuming that the school will not address its core problems?


With regard to Joe Gauld, you state, "he's hopeless, and it's clear he's fading away with a very weak sense of self."  Is there evidence that he's really "fading away with a very weak sense of self"?  I sense you're probably right, but I haven't seen it myself.  What have you seen?
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #29 on: January 21, 2007, 08:29:07 PM »
Quote from: ""Guest""
I'm afraid an economic hammer is the only way to wield some clout around there.  Perhaps if places such as the William H. Donner Foundation stopped giving them money and their insurance company upped premiums (due their utter lack of action on issues they get sued over), they might deign to lend an ear.


Any way to know who their insurance company is or how to contact the companies that donate to them?
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »