Author Topic: CURRENT HLA PARENTS PLEASE READ  (Read 18192 times)

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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #135 on: January 06, 2007, 10:51:36 PM »
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accountant

Sisyphus.

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loans (over 1 million from united comm bank alone within the last few months...which by the way, they did NOT disclose that there was a lawsuit which they knew about AT the closing!!)


Oooh, failure to disclose liabilities? Does UCB yet know about this? Wouldn't it be a shame if someone like you called the branch manager and informed them of this? Legally they can immediately demand full repayment in this kind of situation, at the least.
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #136 on: January 07, 2007, 12:26:31 AM »
they know...it hit the papers and they got an arse chewing...i think buch "straightened" it out (no pun intended)....
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Offline hanzomon4

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« Reply #137 on: January 08, 2007, 10:02:20 AM »
Quote from: ""along comes mary""
I posted this as my topic "to any parents of HLA students...." earlier this afternoon and no ones replying. This topic looks based on the same basic premise, (although all the personal attacks seem to be a very long digression from it), so I'm reposting it below just in case any parents of these kids make it this far. And isn't the point here to do just that? Enlighten anyone looking into HLA as to the true nature of the beast? Can't these personal back-and-forths take place over instant messages or email? Because seriously, no one is going to take the opinion of ANYONE posting on this site with any less than a handful of salt unless mature dialouge is the rule and not the exception. All of you who are squabbling have already taken your stances and made sure that your strong opinions are known by all. But if this isn't just an open forum for personal grudgematches, than may I humbly suggest (this is your site, I'm just an outspoken visitor) that you keep it objective and unnoffensive to the middle aged moms whose opinion you may have a chance of changing.
I'm a deceptively young looking chick with a mouth like... oh lets go with George Carlin, but when I'm tring to be persuasive I know that a little courtreous cencorship goes a long way.
Anyway, heres my post reposted. I hope someone gets SOMETHING from it.:

This issue is obviously more than a two-sided coin.
I have no personal vested interest other than empathy and concern, and as about as objective as a former student can be.

Did I gain anything from my year at HLA?

Absolutley. What didn't kill me made me stronger.
However I survived by flying under the radar.
I watched my friends' spirits broken all too frequently, in one case my friend was a victim of rape and incest from a young age. She was forced to re-live these experiences in front of our peer group at a time when we were all strangers to her, and I will never forget the way that our counselors jeered her, asking "how dirty she felt" and "wasn't she a whore" "didn't she bring it on herself?".
I understand that they didn't mean their remarks and said them in an attempt to break her down so they could "rebuild her", but I was 14 at the time. I was traumatized by having to witness her being broken and I can NOT imagine how she must have felt. But a part of her died,and not the "opposistionally defiant" part. She then began acting out sexually with fellow sudents. I feel like I watched the last surviving innocence she had be smothered before me and it truly haunts me to this day.

Success at HLA is dependent on sooo many variables. The reason for being there and its valididty ( I ran away from a dangerous homelife... for three days.) and the personal relationship the student has with his or her counselors are only 2 such factors.

My parents sent me there, as so many other parents have alleged, "to save my life." I was a well behaved student, but I wasn't pulled for a year of good ( relatively) behavior. My parents pulled me because they accidently were alerted to the fact that they were being manipulated and conned after one very high-up staff member referred to HLA as a source of punishment for kids, not therapy or rehabilitation. I'm sure they would be more than willing to talk to any parents. I'm not sure whether they would recommend HLA or not. You'll most likely hear that it was wrong for me, but maybe helpful for some.

I left HLA about 7 years ago, and it is STILL a huge source of tension and anger in my home, but for reasons that you might not be able to forsee.
My education has suffered.
I was scouted by Harvard after starting university at 16, but my parents spent my entire college savings on HLA, and even with help, Ivy Leauge isn't exactly cheap.
My father resents me for being what I feel he sees me as... a bad investment.
I resent him for wasting my college fund to finance the most traumatic year of my life.
He resents me because I developed post-traumatic stress disorders, panic disorder with agorophopia, generalized anxiety disorder, and recurrent major depressive episodes and my treatment just costs him more money.
And, for the record, all of the above disorders have been diagnosed by multiple psychiatrists, and ALL of them attribute them to my experiences with HLA. I never had a panic attack before HLA, and if you've ever had one then you KNOW they're no joke.

I guess my point here is that sending or keeping your child at HLA or any other facility is a decision that may have positive and probably equally negative consequences for your family.
DO NOT TRUST EDUCATIONAL CONSULTANTS, PLEASE.
Talk to as many child psychologists as you can. They won't recommend a program unless your child really needs one.
As bad as it might seem, "oppostitional defiance disorder" doesn't exist. It is in no DSM ever published and its definition is a vague general description of typical teenage rebellion.
Don't punish your kids for their hormones.

Once you've sent your child "away" do not rely on the program's staff for updates on his or her progress. You have to do a lot of detective work and constantly re-evaluate the nessecity of keeping your child in a program, no matter how structured it sounds, no matter how important graduation from the program is touted as being.

If you're not prepared to weigh your child's descriptions of HLA at least equally as you would trust the description given to you by the staff, then you aren't responsible enough to ensure your child's safety while in HLA's care.

And finally, please learn from my family's mistakes. If you want to ensure a successful future for your teen you can't spend your savings for their college education. Consult 20 random psychologists and psychiatrists before sending your child to HLA, and perhaps most importantly, allow your child to see at least one non-program associated psychologist on EVERY visit, no matter what, and take their opinion on HLA with the upmost seriousness.


This is one of the most intelligent post I've seen here, I hope you register and become a fornites regular... Good luck with the healing process
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #138 on: January 08, 2007, 12:07:28 PM »
It is a fine post, but this sentence is not true...

"As bad as it might seem, "oppostitional defiance disorder" doesn't exist. It is in no DSM ever published and its definition is a vague general description of typical teenage rebellion."

It is in the DSM IV.  Diagnostic code 313.81.  Pages 91-94 give a discription of the diagnosis.
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Offline Deborah

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« Reply #139 on: January 08, 2007, 03:13:17 PM »
In a clinical setting, typical treatment begins with a careful assessment. Assessment requires that a professional therapist, first of all, take a psychological history and develop a family genogram. That?s a sort of picture of the family, like a family tree, that helps put relationships and resources into perspective. Afterward, the therapist asks questions and listens to the parent and child describe what is going on with the child. This is known as the presenting problem. Experienced therapists will be interested in exceptions to the problem, or times when the child is not defiant, and why that may be. There will also be questions about parenting style, starting back when the child was a baby, as well as school, typical family schedules and routines, and ways that conflict is managed. The clinician will try to rule out another mental illness first, in order to focus the right amount of energy and direction on treating the defiance. Other questions will help to fill in the background necessary to get started. This initial assessment might take about 30 minutes, but is often longer.

The next step is to lay out a treatment plan. This might take a couple of sessions. There are several effective and research-proven ways to treat defiance, but the most effective and research-driven technique is a combination of Parent Management Training and an individualized Behavioral Modification Plan. Although each family is treated uniquely, there are certain qualities to this approach that are the same. With Parent Management Training, most of the energy and work with the therapist is directed at the parents, emphasizing new ways to manage the child. The Behavioral Modification Plan will outline rules of the home and society. It will also include rewards the child can earn for following the rules, and consequences associated with breaking the rules. In those consequences, there will be specific steps to follow to make sure the child is held accountable, learns from mistakes, and is ultimately successful.

Eventually, there will be progress, until the child understands that following the rules is a necessary part of life. Although it is possible to complete this treatment program alone, success is almost always more likely with the help and close support of a professional clinician experienced in the use of Parent Management Training and behavioral modification. Typical treatment of moderate to severe defiance requires four to five months. Several visits are usually necessary to get background and rule out other concerns, explain the process, answer questions, and get ready. At least one visit is necessary to develop and practice the Behavioral Modification Plan. The intensive treatment that follows usually involves two or three weeks in itself. The ?maintenance phase? afterward can last from a month or two to six months, although most families are very happy with the results within six weeks, and termination, the final phase, is just one visit.

[edit] Criticism
Some critics have taken the view that, in at least some cases, a person diagnosed with ODD may simply be in conflict with their parents or other people in authority.

For example New Jersey teenager Alex Asch was diagnosed with ODD and held against his will at a juvenile rehabilitation program. [Turnabout Stillwater, Utah] This was the culmination of an ongoing conflict with his parents, which Alex's supporters characterised as being because "Alex's parents would use whatever means they had at their disposal to try to coerce him into adopting their values", rather than because Alex had objective behavioural issues. Alex was an active anarchist, and his parents were members of the Mormon church. [1]
*Asch's story here:
http://www.fornits.com/wwf/viewtopic.ph ... light=asch

This criticism is part of a broader critique that asserts that some behaviour diagnosed as mental illness, is in fact a mentally healthy reaction to circumstances of life or unreasonable behaviour of parents or other authorities.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Opposition ... t_disorder
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gt;>>>>>>>>>>>>>><<<<<<<<<<<<<<
Hidden Lake Academy, after operating 12 years unlicensed will now be monitored by the state. Access information on the Federal Class Action lawsuit against HLA here: http://www.fornits.com/wwf/viewtopic.php?t=17700