Reading that, it is quite clear that not only is Pam not a program parent, she is a weak and enabling parent and her son is a fucking asshole.
Here's where our whole stance on child victim vs. parent abuser gets switched upside down. This is a genuine situation where the parent is being abused and the child has learned that is all he has to do to survive in life... use and abuse his weak willed unconditionally loving mother. Its sad, very sad, for both of them.
I have been out of my parents house since I was 17, I have done WHATEVER it took to survive. I went through a violent relationship, couch hopped, lived in my car (and had many run ins with cops for parking and sleeping in restricted areas), worked 3 jobs, took low paying degrading jobs simply because that was all that was available to a 17 year old, did semi nude photos for cash, sold all my nice things, ate top romin every day, supported myself through school, took care of crazy bratty kids for a place to stay, took on 4000 in credit card debt, had many times got sick from dehydration and starvation, and believe me the list goes on and on.
These are the life lessons asshole kids NEED to learn. It wasn't until I went through this and truly matured that my mom felt confident that I deserved her help. She got me an apartment and offered me a job working for her company and I have been doing well ever since. Not to say it hasn't been rocky or stressful, I still work 3 jobs and often do only have top romin to eat, but I have since became an adult. An adult who pays for her own 3 bedroom house, supports her boyfriend (of 3 years) through college and still has time to devote her efforts to 2 beautiful children and a cause that she is passionate about. If I hadn't been out on my ass and had to learn fist hand how hard life is, I would have never learned how to provide for myself as I do today.
Kids like Pam's son are little shits that always had everything handed to them and never had to work for their lives. You might think I'm being a hypocrite by saying this, and maybe I am because this view slightly contradicts my other views, but I really think these kinds of kids need a dose of reality. Ill never say a program is that solution and when you have a minor in the house that pulls this kind of shit you have VERY little options besides to put up with it till their 18 then give them the boot. But this guy is 21!!! he should have taken that hike A LONG TIME AGO. and he should stop blaming his mom that he hasn't already. Pam isn't innocent in this either, she created this monster by not preparing him to leave at 18, or at the most 20. She has also done more harm than good just throwing money at the situation and being nice. I understand she's probably afraid of this kid so there's not TOO much she can do to kick him into gear... but she needed to put her foot down and cut off the piggy bank a long time ago.
look guys, you can bash on Pam all day long, but from the looks of it, your worst could never trump the daily torture her son has put her through. Maybe not because of her choice for sending him to casa, but I'm sure you can say she has gotten her karma 10 fold. ::poke::