I think Pam's situation is one of those unique ones, where you cant exactly blame them but you cant exactly excuse them either.
my question is where do you draw the line between helping and enabling? and when you do, how do you act upon self preservation without abandoning the child. I think a lot of parents get this equation backwards. They abandon their kids way before they ever consider actually helping them. I don't think this was the case of this program parent. I think she did try, and since her son has come home has continued to help him. The decision she made to send her kid away was only after an extreme situation which is actually rare among program parents. This doesn't excuse her of not doing the proper research, however her actions after she did come across the right information is what sets her apart from the rest... and I really don't think she implied that he should be grateful and act accordingly, I'm sure shes just a bit jaded and wished her son was more well behaved in general.
So there you go Che, soak it up. A real live exception to my theory, and I'm not too proud to admit it.