On 2002-01-12 16:15:00, Eliscu2 wrote:
Is there any treatment for treatment abuse?? just wondering before I am locked up forever. http://www.kabbalart.com
I dunno. I'm afraid to say what I really think, but I think maybe I'll say it anyway.
One difference between the Elan and Straight models is that at Elan, you never went home till you were done, graduated.... whatever. In some ways, I can see where that would be harder on you guys than the way things were with us. But on the other hand, I think there was some benefit. See, in our programs, our parents, families and homes all became part of it.
On higher phases of the Program, you'd live with your own parents if they were within about a two hour drive of the building. You might be sleeping in your own bed, but there were group members living there with you, watching your every move and motion detectors or dead bolts on the doors; austensibly to keep the newcomers from escaping, but we all knew as oldcomers we were just as locked in as they were.
You might go to school or to a job, but your life still revolved around staying out of trouble with Group. Even if you didn't have any group members in your daily routine, a well intended teacher or employer might just report you for some trivial infraction not knowing the hell that might result.
Just trying to visualize your situation and it seems an awful lot like being on 3rd phase in the Program. You're not physically in jail, but in your own home. But you're still under constant scrutiny and threat of consequences.
I'd like to say I can't even imagine walking a mile in your shoes, but unfortunately I can. That you're holding it together at all, I think, shows you're pretty damned tough.
I dunno how you wound up in this situation. And I'm not asking you to tell as it's really none of my business. And it's taboo in our culture to suggest that someone is not crazy after the authorities have declared it so. But my strongest impulse is that you've had just about all the help you can stand. I don't think depression is an un-natural or inappropriate response to what's going on. I think I'd be out of my freakin' mind if I were in your shoes, just knowing what little I do about the situation.
Maybe the thing to do is to devote as much time and attention as you can to just living the life you want for yourself in spite of whatevery anyone else might think about your ability to do so.
On that note, I got a really interesting book from a friend for Christmas. It's about a Libertarian multi-millionaire professor who, through a series of tragic events, winds up being president. It's a light fantasy, really. Junk food for though, not intended to represent any plausible scenario. But just sort of outrageously ballsey in it's premises.
And, now get this, it's put out by an organization called Jews for the Preservation of Firearms Ownership. http://jpfo.org if you want to take a look. I wish my dad were still around, he'd never believe such an organization could exist. What do you think of it?
_________________
Ginger Warbis ~ Antigen
Read a good book lately?
[ This Message was edited by: Antigen on 2002-01-13 10:20 ]