Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > The Seed Discussion Forum

I get to get my first colonoscopy next month

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Ft. Lauderdale:
I wanted to post a little humor

Colonoscopies are no joke , but these comments during the exam were quite humorous.....  

A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his (predominately male) patients while he was performing their colonoscopies:

1. "Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before!
2. "Find Amelia Earhart yet?"
3. "Can you hear me NOW?"
4. "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"
5. "You know, in Arkansas, we're now legally married."
6. "Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?"
7. "You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out..."
8. "Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!"
9. "If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!  
10. "Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity."
11. "You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?"
12. "God, now I know why I am not gay. "
 And the best one of all...

13. "Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up here?"

 :grin:

GregFL:
hehe.  

Just be sure next time they check your prostate the doctor only has ONE hand on your shoulder...

Anonymous:
When I went to get mine, I told my employer I was going to get a fiber optic installed at my old address.  

One nice thing about it, they give you tons of intraveneous vallium, which almost makes it worthwhile.  (For the rest of the day you can't drive, operate machinery or sign contracts.)

Anonymous:
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Butt_plug

GregFL:
Hey Ft Lauderdale, you can practice the grimace beforehand that will inevitably come across your face during the colonoscopy.

 Just copy the expression on the face of the "bottom" cowboy on Brokeback mountain.  Video available now at blockbuster.


Glad to help you out!

 :lol:  :lol:

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