Author Topic: I lost my virginity at Hyde.  (Read 16507 times)

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Offline Anonymous

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I lost my virginity at Hyde.
« Reply #45 on: August 08, 2006, 01:31:14 PM »
Quote from: ""Guest""
Oy Vey!

You people are ridiculous!

Two teens walked OFF campus and had sex and then lied about it.  


 ::troll::  :o  :o  :o  :o  :o  :o  :o  :o  :o  :o  :roll:
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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from an incoming senior...
« Reply #46 on: August 29, 2006, 03:46:08 AM »
excuse me for the informal writing, it's 3:30 in the morning, so bear with me...i'm going to be a senior and it's going to be my 4th year. i have seen good and bad. good from hyde's perspective and good that hyde hasn't recognized. the sterotypical "tool"(what most kids would call the 100% good guys are the ones Hyde will usually praise, yes, and still challenge. i've seen a kid i went to summer challenge with eventually graduate dirty. yes. but I was able to see the IMMENSE positive change he made. he realized to take his life seriously. M.D. was the classic "bad boy" and still looks like the really cool really tough guy. but he's a good kid now. he always was, but he learned some responsibility. for him, that's really all he needed. i've seen "bad" kids come in, refuse; and then refuse a year and a half into it. those kids are a waste of our time, the parents' money. i've seen good kids, such as myself, who've never done anything bad, learn to be less oblivious and also learn that not all of the current youth culture's bad. like, that drinking a little at a party isn't nearly the end of the world. i've gotten a lot out of hyde cuz i put a lot of faith and trust into it. granted, i DID NOT wanna be there during SC '03 and the beginning of freshman year. but i see that hyde is a place to develop yourself, but whatever it needs to be. not necessarily what hyde thinks it should be. whether or not hyde recognizes that you accomplished something doesn't matter. YES THERE ARE FLAWS! but nothing's perfect. i see that there IS a business perspective; hey, someone's gotta pay the bills to keep the place actually open. i worked in the admissions office for three weeks this summer...i noticed we, at least the woodstock campus, has begun to be more selective and not letting people who aren't ready for us in. which is good. i encourage you look at the school, regardless of the stories, it really depends on your kid. maybe he/she needs something more extreme. like elan, or family foundation(although, they may wanna kill themselves after F.F.). or wilderness. or rehab. hyde is a GREAT transition school from one of those, because they are 1) more willing to go to something less strict and 2) if they did the other program right, then they'll be more willing to continue the change they've been making. it's TOTALLY TRUE that hyde's NOT FOR EVERYONE. but you never know till you at least look. but i know that the common thing with teens today is lack of self-confidence, self-worth, or immaturity. usually a good combination. i was all three. what keeps me coming back are the PEOPLE and the staff. so i'm really tired, but PLEASE, if you have any questions, i'll answer them. i see myself as a completely neutral, seeing as i see them all from both sides. My name is Billy Procida...my email address is [email protected]. And good luck with however YOU raise your children. but it's late, and i gotta sleep :)
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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Re: from an incoming senior...
« Reply #47 on: August 29, 2006, 02:10:12 PM »
Quote from: ""jetpride101""
excuse me for the informal writing, it's 3:30 in the morning, so bear with me...i'm going to be a senior and it's going to be my 4th year. i have seen good and bad. good from hyde's perspective and good that hyde hasn't recognized. the sterotypical "tool"(what most kids would call the 100% good guys are the ones Hyde will usually praise, yes, and still challenge. i've seen a kid i went to summer challenge with eventually graduate dirty. yes. but I was able to see the IMMENSE positive change he made. he realized to take his life seriously. M.D. was the classic "bad boy" and still looks like the really cool really tough guy. but he's a good kid now. he always was, but he learned some responsibility. for him, that's really all he needed. i've seen "bad" kids come in, refuse; and then refuse a year and a half into it. those kids are a waste of our time, the parents' money. i've seen good kids, such as myself, who've never done anything bad, learn to be less oblivious and also learn that not all of the current youth culture's bad. like, that drinking a little at a party isn't nearly the end of the world. i've gotten a lot out of hyde cuz i put a lot of faith and trust into it. granted, i DID NOT wanna be there during SC '03 and the beginning of freshman year. but i see that hyde is a place to develop yourself, but whatever it needs to be. not necessarily what hyde thinks it should be. whether or not hyde recognizes that you accomplished something doesn't matter. YES THERE ARE FLAWS! but nothing's perfect. i see that there IS a business perspective; hey, someone's gotta pay the bills to keep the place actually open. i worked in the admissions office for three weeks this summer...i noticed we, at least the woodstock campus, has begun to be more selective and not letting people who aren't ready for us in. which is good. i encourage you look at the school, regardless of the stories, it really depends on your kid. maybe he/she needs something more extreme. like elan, or family foundation(although, they may wanna kill themselves after F.F.). or wilderness. or rehab. hyde is a GREAT transition school from one of those, because they are 1) more willing to go to something less strict and 2) if they did the other program right, then they'll be more willing to continue the change they've been making. it's TOTALLY TRUE that hyde's NOT FOR EVERYONE. but you never know till you at least look. but i know that the common thing with teens today is lack of self-confidence, self-worth, or immaturity. usually a good combination. i was all three. what keeps me coming back are the PEOPLE and the staff. so i'm really tired, but PLEASE, if you have any questions, i'll answer them. i see myself as a completely neutral, seeing as i see them all from both sides. My name is Billy Procida...my email address is [email protected]. And good luck with however YOU raise your children. but it's late, and i gotta sleep :)


Thanks for your comments. I'm glad to know things have worked out well for you at Hyde. Also, I appreciate your willingness to answer questions about Hyde. Since you were asked to work in the admissions office I imagine you're one of the "on track" kids at Hyde who has invested himself. That's great that Hyde was comfortable having you meet parents and students, show them around, etc.. When I was at Hyde I definitely saw some kids who were like you, but not too many..

I also saw the "other" side of Hyde. I met many students who, in my opinion, never should have gone to Hyde and were often "off track," on 2-4, sent to outpost, ran away, etc.. They had serious psychiatric problems or drug/alc problems, but Hyde took them anyway. I definitely met students there who needed treatment, not Hyde. I could never understand why Hyde acceptd these students when it didn't have anyone on staff to counsel them.

I now get questions from parents who are thinking about Hyde and know I was there. In my honest opinion, the good at Hyde (which you experienced and benefited from) does not outweigh the bad. I tell parents they should look for a school that cares about values, character, and all the good stuff, but that doesn't have Hyde's problems. Hyde tells everyone it's about character education, which is true. Character education the way Hyde does it seems to work for a certain kind of student (you seem to be an example), but it seems to fail with many students because they need something real different from what Hyde offers (usually related to their mental health/drug/alc problems).

I also had a big problem with some of the seminars, which seemed an awful lot like group therapy at times. What bothered me is that it wasn't unusual for people to "break down" in those groups or "lose it," but no one with professional training was there to handle that stuff. I saw some really bad incidents.

Here are my questions for you:

* How many of students were in your entering class (2003)? How many graduated?
* How has Hyde changed its admission standards? You said they're being more selective. How?
* What percentage of Hyde's current students seem to have pretty serious mental health/psychiatric problems? Drug/alc problems? Has that changed since you started at Hyde?
* Did you witness any bad incidents in seminars (FLCs) or was it all good? Did you think the staff had the proper training to handle those groups, especially when things got real intense?
* How much turnover is there with teachers these days? When I was at Hyde the turnover was real high.
* Is Joe Gauld still very involved? What's your experience with him?

Thanks for posting.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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I lost my virginity at Hyde.
« Reply #48 on: January 11, 2007, 01:57:15 AM »
Hi, it's me, the original poster,
I guess I have no real way to identify myself considering I posted originally as a guest. I just want to say that

I don't really think it was rape
or sexual abuse or anything like that; I never said that, and
that wasn't the point in me posting at all.

All I know is my own experience. I was simply sharing my own experience, that did happen at Hyde.
What I'm still a bit upset about is the way that Hyde told me I was a liar,
the way EVERYONE AT HYDE,  STAFF included, took it upon themselves to freely humilate me over this incident, calling me disgusting, a liar, etc, every
day for almost a year... That was horrible, regardless of what anyone says or thinks. I remember actually being cornered in the cafeteria by one senior, one of many intense and false "confrontations" over an already emotional and somewhat painful experience, being screamed at to admit that I was lying, for hours...and I remember crying and just being so frustrated because I wasn't lying about it, but the truth wasn't enough. All these incident sheets...sometimes things were just forced out of you; they needed some kind of horrible, dramatic confession even when there was none. That, honestly, is a sick environment, and it is an environment that turned a normally bad teenage experience into a terrible one. I am not trying to say that Hyde is a horrible, evil cult or anything.  It isn't a great, awesome perfect and all-knowing place, either...not at all. Things aren't all black and white.

But the fact remains: I never had sex before I came to Hyde, and although it obviously would have happened regardless, I certainly wouldn't have had to deal with the gross aftermath that I dealt with at Hyde, which DID have a lasting, negative effect on me as a woman and as a person.
My father sent me to Hyde with the hopes of me actually growing there, with the hopes of my already shattered self-esteem healing and re-building, not being stomped out almost completely.


....as others have pointed out, Hyde really didn't have the slightest idea how to handle a kid like me...and many others like me, but Hyde grabs us up anyway (Hyde always knows best) and actually hurts us by doing so. Yes, it does "work" for some people, but the key word there is SOME. Helping some kids does not justify hurting countless others.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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I lost my virginity at Hyde.
« Reply #49 on: January 11, 2007, 01:58:10 AM »
Hi, it's me, the original poster,
I guess I have no real way to identify myself considering I posted originally as a guest. I just want to say that

I don't really think it was rape
or sexual abuse or anything like that; I never said that, and
that wasn't the point in me posting at all.

All I know is my own experience. I was simply sharing my own experience, that did happen at Hyde.
What I'm still a bit upset about is the way that Hyde told me I was a liar,
the way EVERYONE AT HYDE,  STAFF included, took it upon themselves to freely humiliate me over this incident, calling me disgusting, a liar, etc, every
day for almost a year... That was horrible, regardless of what anyone says or thinks. I remember actually being cornered in the cafeteria by one senior, one of many intense and false "confrontations" over an already emotional and somewhat painful experience, being screamed at to admit that I was lying, for hours...and I remember crying and just being so frustrated because I wasn't lying about it, but the truth wasn't enough. All these incident sheets...sometimes things were just forced out of you; they needed some kind of horrible, dramatic confession even when there was none. That, honestly, is a sick environment, and it is an environment that turned a normally bad teenage experience into a terrible one. I am not trying to say that Hyde is a horrible, evil cult or anything.  It isn't a great, awesome perfect and all-knowing place, either...not at all. Things aren't all black and white.

But the fact remains: I never had sex before I came to Hyde, and although it obviously would have happened regardless, I certainly wouldn't have had to deal with the gross aftermath that I dealt with at Hyde, which DID have a lasting, negative effect on me as a woman and as a person.
My father sent me to Hyde with the hopes of me actually growing there, with the hopes of my already shattered self-esteem healing and re-building, not being stomped out almost completely.


....as others have pointed out, Hyde really didn't have the slightest idea how to handle a kid like me...and many others like me, but Hyde grabs us up anyway (Hyde always knows best) and actually hurts us by doing so. Yes, it does "work" for some people, but the key word there is SOME. Helping some kids does not justify hurting countless others.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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I lost my virginity at Hyde.
« Reply #50 on: January 11, 2007, 03:05:23 AM »
Quote from: ""Guest""
Hi, it's me, the original poster,
I guess I have no real way to identify myself considering I posted originally as a guest. I just want to say that

I don't really think it was rape
or sexual abuse or anything like that; I never said that, and
that wasn't the point in me posting at all.

All I know is my own experience. I was simply sharing my own experience, that did happen at Hyde.
What I'm still a bit upset about is the way that Hyde told me I was a liar,
the way EVERYONE AT HYDE,  STAFF included, took it upon themselves to freely humiliate me over this incident, calling me disgusting, a liar, etc, every
day for almost a year... That was horrible, regardless of what anyone says or thinks. I remember actually being cornered in the cafeteria by one senior, one of many intense and false "confrontations" over an already emotional and somewhat painful experience, being screamed at to admit that I was lying, for hours...and I remember crying and just being so frustrated because I wasn't lying about it, but the truth wasn't enough. All these incident sheets...sometimes things were just forced out of you; they needed some kind of horrible, dramatic confession even when there was none. That, honestly, is a sick environment, and it is an environment that turned a normally bad teenage experience into a terrible one. I am not trying to say that Hyde is a horrible, evil cult or anything.  It isn't a great, awesome perfect and all-knowing place, either...not at all. Things aren't all black and white.

But the fact remains: I never had sex before I came to Hyde, and although it obviously would have happened regardless, I certainly wouldn't have had to deal with the gross aftermath that I dealt with at Hyde, which DID have a lasting, negative effect on me as a woman and as a person.
My father sent me to Hyde with the hopes of me actually growing there, with the hopes of my already shattered self-esteem healing and re-building, not being stomped out almost completely.


....as others have pointed out, Hyde really didn't have the slightest idea how to handle a kid like me...and many others like me, but Hyde grabs us up anyway (Hyde always knows best) and actually hurts us by doing so. Yes, it does "work" for some people, but the key word there is SOME. Helping some kids does not justify hurting countless others.


Thnx for your words; I , too, experienced a hell of witch-hunting slander and worse at Hyde.  Reading your post brought those feelings back.  Our situations are different, but the aftermath similar.  I tried to put it behind me, met the world with a brave face.  But the truth remains:  I have lived my life differently, with many barricades, to shield myself from ever experiencing something like that again.

The school lied to me.  The school lied to the other students about me.  The school put me through slanderous public discussion and inspired the student body to participate in the same, both en masse and privately.  The excesses that people vented are simply indescribable.  I was abandoned by all my friends.

I had problems with depression before this all happened.  Since then, I was diagnosed with major depression.  I can not get treatment, preferring to suffer, as I have such distrust of any "establishment" organizations.  I am afraid of what they might put me through next, or the labels, or the public ostracizing.

It has been a long time, decades, and I don't feel much further along than I started.  Sometimes I feel stuck in time, haunted, by this unjust condemnation from people I had heretofore trusted and respected.

This place took something from me that should never be taken from any kid, ever.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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I lost my virginity at Hyde.
« Reply #51 on: January 11, 2007, 09:21:07 AM »
Quote from: ""Guest""
Quote from: ""Guest""
Hi, it's me, the original poster,
I guess I have no real way to identify myself considering I posted originally as a guest. I just want to say that

I don't really think it was rape
or sexual abuse or anything like that; I never said that, and
that wasn't the point in me posting at all.

All I know is my own experience. I was simply sharing my own experience, that did happen at Hyde.
What I'm still a bit upset about is the way that Hyde told me I was a liar,
the way EVERYONE AT HYDE,  STAFF included, took it upon themselves to freely humiliate me over this incident, calling me disgusting, a liar, etc, every
day for almost a year... That was horrible, regardless of what anyone says or thinks. I remember actually being cornered in the cafeteria by one senior, one of many intense and false "confrontations" over an already emotional and somewhat painful experience, being screamed at to admit that I was lying, for hours...and I remember crying and just being so frustrated because I wasn't lying about it, but the truth wasn't enough. All these incident sheets...sometimes things were just forced out of you; they needed some kind of horrible, dramatic confession even when there was none. That, honestly, is a sick environment, and it is an environment that turned a normally bad teenage experience into a terrible one. I am not trying to say that Hyde is a horrible, evil cult or anything.  It isn't a great, awesome perfect and all-knowing place, either...not at all. Things aren't all black and white.

But the fact remains: I never had sex before I came to Hyde, and although it obviously would have happened regardless, I certainly wouldn't have had to deal with the gross aftermath that I dealt with at Hyde, which DID have a lasting, negative effect on me as a woman and as a person.
My father sent me to Hyde with the hopes of me actually growing there, with the hopes of my already shattered self-esteem healing and re-building, not being stomped out almost completely.


....as others have pointed out, Hyde really didn't have the slightest idea how to handle a kid like me...and many others like me, but Hyde grabs us up anyway (Hyde always knows best) and actually hurts us by doing so. Yes, it does "work" for some people, but the key word there is SOME. Helping some kids does not justify hurting countless others.

Thnx for your words; I , too, experienced a hell of witch-hunting slander and worse at Hyde.  Reading your post brought those feelings back.  Our situations are different, but the aftermath similar.  I tried to put it behind me, met the world with a brave face.  But the truth remains:  I have lived my life differently, with many barricades, to shield myself from ever experiencing something like that again.

The school lied to me.  The school lied to the other students about me.  The school put me through slanderous public discussion and inspired the student body to participate in the same, both en masse and privately.  The excesses that people vented are simply indescribable.  I was abandoned by all my friends.

I had problems with depression before this all happened.  Since then, I was diagnosed with major depression.  I can not get treatment, preferring to suffer, as I have such distrust of any "establishment" organizations.  I am afraid of what they might put me through next, or the labels, or the public ostracizing.

It has been a long time, decades, and I don't feel much further along than I started.  Sometimes I feel stuck in time, haunted, by this unjust condemnation from people I had heretofore trusted and respected.

This place took something from me that should never be taken from any kid, ever.



I find it so painful to read about your horrific experiences at Hyde.  What really infuriates me is that I've met, talked to, and heard from dozens of people who felt terribly abused by Hyde staff (and even some alumni parents in FLCs, etc.).  I'm getting a strong sense that  there's a critical mass of people who feel enraged at Hyde and still suffer severe emotional scars as a result of their Hyde experience.  This web site provides an opportunity for people like you to discover that you're not alone.  Until now, many Hyde victims suffered in silence.  Perhaps this forum is providing a therapeutic outlet and, as important, a way for the general public to learn about Hyde's very dark side.

I wish you well as you wrestle with Hyde's painful and shameful legacy.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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I lost my virginity at Hyde.
« Reply #52 on: January 11, 2007, 09:57:27 AM »
Quote
This web site provides an opportunity for people like you to discover that you're not alone. Until now, many Hyde victims suffered in silence. Perhaps this forum is providing a therapeutic outlet and, as important, a way for the general public to learn about Hyde's very dark side.

Yes, thank you.  Very much so on both points.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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I lost my virginity at Hyde.
« Reply #53 on: January 11, 2007, 10:59:58 AM »
Quote from: ""Guest""
Quote from: ""Guest""
Quote from: ""Guest""
Hi, it's me, the original poster,
I guess I have no real way to identify myself considering I posted originally as a guest. I just want to say that

I don't really think it was rape
or sexual abuse or anything like that; I never said that, and
that wasn't the point in me posting at all.

All I know is my own experience. I was simply sharing my own experience, that did happen at Hyde.
What I'm still a bit upset about is the way that Hyde told me I was a liar,
the way EVERYONE AT HYDE,  STAFF included, took it upon themselves to freely humiliate me over this incident, calling me disgusting, a liar, etc, every
day for almost a year... That was horrible, regardless of what anyone says or thinks. I remember actually being cornered in the cafeteria by one senior, one of many intense and false "confrontations" over an already emotional and somewhat painful experience, being screamed at to admit that I was lying, for hours...and I remember crying and just being so frustrated because I wasn't lying about it, but the truth wasn't enough. All these incident sheets...sometimes things were just forced out of you; they needed some kind of horrible, dramatic confession even when there was none. That, honestly, is a sick environment, and it is an environment that turned a normally bad teenage experience into a terrible one. I am not trying to say that Hyde is a horrible, evil cult or anything.  It isn't a great, awesome perfect and all-knowing place, either...not at all. Things aren't all black and white.

But the fact remains: I never had sex before I came to Hyde, and although it obviously would have happened regardless, I certainly wouldn't have had to deal with the gross aftermath that I dealt with at Hyde, which DID have a lasting, negative effect on me as a woman and as a person.
My father sent me to Hyde with the hopes of me actually growing there, with the hopes of my already shattered self-esteem healing and re-building, not being stomped out almost completely.


....as others have pointed out, Hyde really didn't have the slightest idea how to handle a kid like me...and many others like me, but Hyde grabs us up anyway (Hyde always knows best) and actually hurts us by doing so. Yes, it does "work" for some people, but the key word there is SOME. Helping some kids does not justify hurting countless others.

Thnx for your words; I , too, experienced a hell of witch-hunting slander and worse at Hyde.  Reading your post brought those feelings back.  Our situations are different, but the aftermath similar.  I tried to put it behind me, met the world with a brave face.  But the truth remains:  I have lived my life differently, with many barricades, to shield myself from ever experiencing something like that again.

The school lied to me.  The school lied to the other students about me.  The school put me through slanderous public discussion and inspired the student body to participate in the same, both en masse and privately.  The excesses that people vented are simply indescribable.  I was abandoned by all my friends.

I had problems with depression before this all happened.  Since then, I was diagnosed with major depression.  I can not get treatment, preferring to suffer, as I have such distrust of any "establishment" organizations.  I am afraid of what they might put me through next, or the labels, or the public ostracizing.

It has been a long time, decades, and I don't feel much further along than I started.  Sometimes I feel stuck in time, haunted, by this unjust condemnation from people I had heretofore trusted and respected.

This place took something from me that should never be taken from any kid, ever.


I find it so painful to read about your horrific experiences at Hyde.  What really infuriates me is that I've met, talked to, and heard from dozens of people who felt terribly abused by Hyde staff (and even some alumni parents in FLCs, etc.).  I'm getting a strong sense that  there's a critical mass of people who feel enraged at Hyde and still suffer severe emotional scars as a result of their Hyde experience.  This web site provides an opportunity for people like you to discover that you're not alone.  Until now, many Hyde victims suffered in silence.  Perhaps this forum is providing a therapeutic outlet and, as important, a way for the general public to learn about Hyde's very dark side.

I wish you well as you wrestle with Hyde's painful and shameful legacy.


  The Brother's Keeper piece takes on an unhealthy "Lord of the Flies" aspect at times.  I saw some things that were unjust that were consented to by the community. One that comes to mind is two seniors caught in concentual sex.  Male graduates.  Female labeled a "slut"  Sound familiar?
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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I lost my virginity at Hyde.
« Reply #54 on: January 11, 2007, 08:38:57 PM »
Quote from: ""Guest""
Quote from: ""Guest""
Quote from: ""Guest""
Quote from: ""Guest""
Hi, it's me, the original poster,
I guess I have no real way to identify myself considering I posted originally as a guest. I just want to say that

I don't really think it was rape
or sexual abuse or anything like that; I never said that, and
that wasn't the point in me posting at all.

All I know is my own experience. I was simply sharing my own experience, that did happen at Hyde.
What I'm still a bit upset about is the way that Hyde told me I was a liar,
the way EVERYONE AT HYDE,  STAFF included, took it upon themselves to freely humiliate me over this incident, calling me disgusting, a liar, etc, every
day for almost a year... That was horrible, regardless of what anyone says or thinks. I remember actually being cornered in the cafeteria by one senior, one of many intense and false "confrontations" over an already emotional and somewhat painful experience, being screamed at to admit that I was lying, for hours...and I remember crying and just being so frustrated because I wasn't lying about it, but the truth wasn't enough. All these incident sheets...sometimes things were just forced out of you; they needed some kind of horrible, dramatic confession even when there was none. That, honestly, is a sick environment, and it is an environment that turned a normally bad teenage experience into a terrible one. I am not trying to say that Hyde is a horrible, evil cult or anything.  It isn't a great, awesome perfect and all-knowing place, either...not at all. Things aren't all black and white.

But the fact remains: I never had sex before I came to Hyde, and although it obviously would have happened regardless, I certainly wouldn't have had to deal with the gross aftermath that I dealt with at Hyde, which DID have a lasting, negative effect on me as a woman and as a person.
My father sent me to Hyde with the hopes of me actually growing there, with the hopes of my already shattered self-esteem healing and re-building, not being stomped out almost completely.


....as others have pointed out, Hyde really didn't have the slightest idea how to handle a kid like me...and many others like me, but Hyde grabs us up anyway (Hyde always knows best) and actually hurts us by doing so. Yes, it does "work" for some people, but the key word there is SOME. Helping some kids does not justify hurting countless others.

Thnx for your words; I , too, experienced a hell of witch-hunting slander and worse at Hyde.  Reading your post brought those feelings back.  Our situations are different, but the aftermath similar.  I tried to put it behind me, met the world with a brave face.  But the truth remains:  I have lived my life differently, with many barricades, to shield myself from ever experiencing something like that again.

The school lied to me.  The school lied to the other students about me.  The school put me through slanderous public discussion and inspired the student body to participate in the same, both en masse and privately.  The excesses that people vented are simply indescribable.  I was abandoned by all my friends.

I had problems with depression before this all happened.  Since then, I was diagnosed with major depression.  I can not get treatment, preferring to suffer, as I have such distrust of any "establishment" organizations.  I am afraid of what they might put me through next, or the labels, or the public ostracizing.

It has been a long time, decades, and I don't feel much further along than I started.  Sometimes I feel stuck in time, haunted, by this unjust condemnation from people I had heretofore trusted and respected.

This place took something from me that should never be taken from any kid, ever.


I find it so painful to read about your horrific experiences at Hyde.  What really infuriates me is that I've met, talked to, and heard from dozens of people who felt terribly abused by Hyde staff (and even some alumni parents in FLCs, etc.).  I'm getting a strong sense that  there's a critical mass of people who feel enraged at Hyde and still suffer severe emotional scars as a result of their Hyde experience.  This web site provides an opportunity for people like you to discover that you're not alone.  Until now, many Hyde victims suffered in silence.  Perhaps this forum is providing a therapeutic outlet and, as important, a way for the general public to learn about Hyde's very dark side.

I wish you well as you wrestle with Hyde's painful and shameful legacy.

  The Brother's Keeper piece takes on an unhealthy "Lord of the Flies" aspect at times.  I saw some things that were unjust that were consented to by the community. One that comes to mind is two seniors caught in concentual sex.  Male graduates.  Female labeled a "slut"  Sound familiar?


Not to mention that with Brother's Keeper (at least Hyde's version of it), I often saw the proverbial pot calling the kettle black.  Still more evidence of Hyde's very special, and pathetic, brand of hypocrisy.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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I lost my virginity at Hyde.
« Reply #55 on: April 11, 2007, 11:00:07 PM »
to the original poster:
thanks you for sharing that with us, although you shared this long ago. i read this as one of the first threads i read on fornits. i was saddened. i even emailed it to mr. bragg b/c maybe he could remember the incident and you and know you weren't lying and if you were ever brough up in conversation as a liar, he could say something. another senior at bath i met happened to read this too, he had done the same thing that i had done.
i don't like the whole battling out atmosphere on this site. i wish it could just be a place to share your experiences, good and bad. b/c it is a therapeutic thing to do. i hope others are able to post something as difficult and hate-enducing as this memory was without trying to bash hyde.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Ursus

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I lost my virginity at Hyde.
« Reply #56 on: April 12, 2007, 03:07:42 AM »
Quote from: ""billy procida""
to the original poster:
thanks you for sharing that with us, although you shared this long ago. i read this as one of the first threads i read on fornits. i was saddened. i even emailed it to mr. bragg b/c maybe he could remember the incident and you and know you weren't lying and if you were ever brough up in conversation as a liar, he could say something. another senior at bath i met happened to read this too, he had done the same thing that i had done.
i don't like the whole battling out atmosphere on this site. i wish it could just be a place to share your experiences, good and bad. b/c it is a therapeutic thing to do. i hope others are able to post something as difficult and hate-enducing as this memory was without trying to bash hyde.


That was really nice of you, Billy.  And that was really nice of your friend, too.  I can only hope that the OP is stopping back from time to time and will find in your words some validation of her experience.  Hopefully, Mr. Bragg will take note of the trauma he was somehow involved in, even if in no other capacity than being the one who picked up the pair en route back to school.

It is very therapeutic to share one's experiences, both good and bad, and I am sure this site has enabled many to start on a path of recovery and/or realization vis a vie their time at Hyde.  For many, but not all, "bashing Hyde" is a necessary and life-affirming part of that process.

Unfortunately, it is impossible to delve into this site even but superficially without coming to the inescapable conclusion that something is very awry in the way Hyde chooses to effect "character education."  This thread alone details story after story of unbelievably painful life-changing traumas.  I seriously doubt that there are not countless others that haven't been aired yet.  And on top of the trauma, as unbelievably bad as the incidents in and of themselves undoubtedly are, there is an additional shitload of prolonged torture and character assassination that Hyde not only participates in, but revels in, as an inherent part of the "character development" process.  This makes my blood boil.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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Offline lucy

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I lost my virginity at Hyde.
« Reply #57 on: April 13, 2007, 09:31:58 AM »
Quote from: ""billy procida""
to the original poster:
thanks you for sharing that with us, although you shared this long ago. i read this as one of the first threads i read on fornits. i was saddened. i even emailed it to mr. bragg b/c maybe he could remember the incident and you and know you weren't lying and if you were ever brough up in conversation as a liar, he could say something. another senior at bath i met happened to read this too, he had done the same thing that i had done.
i don't like the whole battling out atmosphere on this site. i wish it could just be a place to share your experiences, good and bad. b/c it is a therapeutic thing to do. i hope others are able to post something as difficult and hate-enducing as this memory was without trying to bash hyde.


Part of the original post.......

If I didn't have my father...
I would have ended up in foster care, and the foster care system here--at least from what I've heard of it, from what I understand--is, to put it lightly, hell. My father HAD to get me into SOME kind of school program, quick, or he was going to lose me... Like I'm sure most parents do, he did a lot of searching, consulted some people, blah blah...and decided on Hyde. I do believe that he wanted the best for me, and Hyde looked the best to him...but

he couldn't afford it... SO
he went to court to get the life-insurance money (left in my name from my mother dying),
to pay for Hyde.

That said...

Hyde put me back on grade level as a freshman. For that, I am extremely thankful.

HOWEVER

Did I get the help I needed? No. At that point in my life, (I can admit now that) I was a pretty disturbed individual. I had no desire to do anything. In the morning, I didn't want to wake up; I wanted to sleep forever, and I physically couldn't sleep at night without six or seven Xanax, minimum.

I needed serious psychological HELP. Instead, I recieved MORE psychological DAMAGE.

At Hyde, I picked up the habit of cutting myself, a practice I learned from fellow students. My reality became even more distorted. I was made to feel inferior. I was isolated, and, at the age of 14 (through 15) utterly ALONE, an object... I did not feel human. The Xanax was taken away cold turkey, with no kind of therapy at all. Food became my replacement for this; at mealtime I would eat as much as possible, because it was all I had to comfort myself, and then I was made to feel inferior/disgusting about my body (mostly BY STAFF); I eventually developed a mild eating-disorder which, chances are, would NOT have developed in a HEALTHIER environment.

Post-traumatic stress? Instead of recovering from that, or even reckognizing that I was suffering from it, I got traumatized again...cold bathroom floor and all the words that followed... Instead of healing, I got fresh wounds. Every day I felt trapped, hopeless, abandoned and misunderstood. Most of my peers (majority of which were rich, much older kids, coming from a totally different culture) looked down on me and abused me. Most of the staff (though one or two did genuilely care/make attempts at helping me without really knowing how) stopped ignoring me ONLY to chastise and humiliate. (My already-unhealthily-low self-esteem became almost non-existant.)

I do believe that (though many succesful Hyde students are simply good actors, caught in a sadomasohistic script)...Hyde does work for some people...the keyword there being "some". There ARE certainly a FEW kids who have actually been helped by it. But that isn't enough to justify the damage it has done (and continues to do) to others, to kids like me. It has taken me years of therapy just to understand and begin to get past this, to be able to write about it now.

To the "Guest" who originally posted her trauma at Hyde,

I want to tell you how sad I feel for you and how much I can relate to this.  I would like to correspond with you in a "private message" if that is ok.  I think that maybe we can help each other.  I get the feeling you don't know how to set up a way to do this.  You need to sign up for a name.  You do not have to use your name.  You can call yourself whatever you want.  No one will be able to get in touch with you outside of this board.  You can check for private messages whenever you want to sign in.

You did NOTHING WRONG at Hyde. You were innocent, naive and a part of you wanted and needed the attention you thought you would get from this guy who took advantage of you.  You then were made to feel shame.  The shame is with Hyde for accepting you into their program to begin with.  For knowing your father had to take your trust money to pay for this so called character school. This is not your father's fault.  Hyde told us that they could help our daughters self esteem and instead they destroyed it.  It is great that you are writing about your experiences here for the sake of other girls who might be considering Hyde and come to this board.  Unfortunately I don't have high hopes that Hyde will try to change.  They have never taken responsibility for the wrongs they commit.

PLEASE sign up for a name on this board so I can then private message you.

As far as Billy, thank you for bringing this to the attention of the person at Hyde who had something to do with this.  I hope he doesn't come back to you and just slander the poor girl which would be typical of Hyde.  Point is that Hyde has emotionally damaged many people.  Whether these people already had problems or not is not the point.  It is wrong to take in kids who need psychological counseling and put them in Hyde's seminars.  It is downright dangerous and detrimental to them.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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I lost my virginity at Hyde.
« Reply #58 on: April 13, 2007, 09:59:05 AM »
Quote from: ""billy procida""
to the original poster:
thanks you for sharing that with us, although you shared this long ago. i read this as one of the first threads i read on fornits. i was saddened. i even emailed it to mr. bragg b/c maybe he could remember the incident and you and know you weren't lying and if you were ever brough up in conversation as a liar, he could say something. another senior at bath i met happened to read this too, he had done the same thing that i had done.
i don't like the whole battling out atmosphere on this site. i wish it could just be a place to share your experiences, good and bad. b/c it is a therapeutic thing to do. i hope others are able to post something as difficult and hate-enducing as this memory was without trying to bash hyde.

Billy, I hope you take this the way it is meant, with concern.  Contacting Mr Bragg was great.  He should know the affect he had on somebody.  You say you don't like the "whole battling out atmosphere on this sit" and that it is therapeutic to share your experiences.

Let me share my thoughts with you on the above.  I too was damaged by Hyde.  I do not come to this board to find therapy.  I go to a well qualified therapist for this.  I come to this board to get support from others who have experienced similar problems at Hyde.  It validates what happened to me and helps me get this off of my chest. Hyde destroyed parts of me by pretending to do their own therapy with seminars and FLC's.  You are very lucky that you don't seem to need Hyde for the same reasons we did.  Hyde gave hurt some of us through shame and humiliation and tried to control us through 2-4 and negative reinforcement.  This might work on some, but doesn't on others including myself.  Hyde needs to know this and maybe you are the one who can accomplish this. My worry is that hyde does not care. In your post you mention that you wish other people could tell their stories like this girl did without bashing hyde.  Go back and look at her story again.  She did bash Hyde.  She pointed out how poorly Hyde handled the entire situation and how they foster an astmosphere where the whole year this girl was ragged on.  I know you are very pro hyde and i am glad you enjoy being there, but for some of us hyde was very damaging. if you don't like to hear this i am sorry, but we are telling the truth.

I hope you continue to come to this board because you seem to be sincere, but i think that people need to say whatever they feel like saying in order to help them through their post hyde years. If I thought that hyde wanted to be different i would sit down with them tomorrow and give them my thoughts, but hyde has never shown they want to change or be better. they have their own little AA type of program and this is how they want to stay
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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I lost my virginity at Hyde.
« Reply #59 on: April 13, 2007, 10:22:59 AM »
hyde mishandles many situations. so do many other schools and institutions and people in general. i don't consider it bashing to say hyde mishandled a particular situation. i think it's bashing when they start saying "hyde mishandles ALL situations or MOST" when they haven't checked to see if that's true. so i don't consider her bashing hyde. mr. bragg didn't come back to anyone. i didn't even get a response. he really didn't do anything. he only picked them up to give 'em a lift back to campus so they didn't have to walk. but he's the only person i can contact that is mentioned by name in the post, and i felt that someone should know. same with that other kid from bath. i've shown some facutly that particular post to show that there is something to be learned from this site. but no one's going to listen the way a majority of posts are worded on this site. people like ursus discredit what some people like this original poster say. any hyde faculty will speak to you. over the phone or through email. but they have made it clear they're not going to waste their time posting on a forum board. and if you were to talk to them on the phone, there's a proper way to go about things. not calling up yelling and cursing (which has happened). make yourself respectable to listen to. some of ya'll here do. some really don't. and the latter discredit the former. trust me, my school has its demons. so do many other, all other, institutions. and i think hyde admins can learn something from some of you. but it's ya'll's presentation. there's also somethign ya'll can learn from me. because, at least for woodstock, things have changed in the way thigns operate down here then from last year, 5 years ago, 10 years ago. it's an evolving place. help be part of the change. because some of you jsut come here and bitch and moan, and that doesn't do anyone any good.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »