Struggling Teens or Struggling Parents???

[Anonymous]

Leslie, if you're worried about some past "friends" of Gregg's giving him a bad time during the few days he planned to visit you before he leaves for college: Why not just take Gregg on a short trip somewhere, so the two of you can just really enjoy yourselves, without the stress of "hiding out from these people?"

It doesn't have to be something FANCY--just some nice quality time for you two. Take in a movie, talk to each other, eat some favorite foods. Then perhaps spend a day visiting his grandmother that you talk about.
Just try to enjoy his visit, and work out a plan for him getting prepared for summer and college in the fall.
You really can make this work if you put your son's best interest first.

[Anonymous]

I am on anti-depressents, and panic pills and sleeping pills.

You should seek help for your drug problems. I know of several Ed Cons who can tell you a good place to go for a few years while you clean yourself up.

[Nihilanthic]

hang on, what the fuck is with spending all that money and time programming a kid, and then, dumping him?

 :roll: this shit doesnt even make any sense!!

[Anonymous]

He is going to a community college this Fall, and he will be busy seeing relatives, and doing fun things and watching sports on tv of course.

[Anonymous]

Leslie: shut up!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Anonymous]

Reading ST makes me sick to my stomach.

I'm probably gonna sound like Luke here, but: I've got your "contract" right here, bitch.

I'm out. Someone needs to kill these people, and I'm just not allowed to do it. Just one call-down.. sigh.

[Troll Control]

On 2006-05-04 12:24:00, Anonymous wrote:

"Leslie: shut up!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

I thought I was clear when I told you this would not happen.

[OverLordd]

hang on, what the fuck is with spending all that money and time programming a kid, and then, dumping him?

Wait a few days, i'll ask

[Badpuppy]

This mother loves her son, but abandoned him long before he got to a program. She was so needy herself, she was incapable of parenting her son. That is why she feels so guilty. Little of that guilt is because the kid was sent to a program. She actually excites preditory instinct, like a child running away from a dog. Although your son does love you, he despises your weakness and hypervulnerablity. That is why he always takes his fathers side. The both of you were totally unable to give any emotional support or parenting at all, though to your credit you provided him with material support. As a child this kid was emotionally supporting you instead of the other way around. He saw the abuse and neediness you had and knew you couldn't protect him.  Years from now when he feels he no longer needs protection hopefully he will recognize you as the more loving parent.
Through this board you are living out your emotional life. You come seeking crumbs of approval, but get disrespect. That is why you will keep coming back. Your masachistic. Your attracted to painful experiences.

It is hard to see how a kid living in this situation wouldn't be doing drugs. And, incidentally I strongly suspect he will be doing them again, although hopefully he will consume them in safe and moderate manner. HE NEEDS TO BE NOWHERE NEAR HOME BUT FOR A FEW DAYS. And don't ask questions you don't want to know the answer to, like drugs and sex. Tell him it is the dorm or he pays for it himself. College life away from home is among the best years of persons life. He should have a blast, particularly at a not very academically intense community college.
As for his puppyshit freind stalkers, tape their demands, send them a copy of the tape and tell them to forget about their money, if your son is ever touched the tape is going to the FBI for extortion prosecution.  That is protecting your son. Both the mother and father got 0 parenting I.Qs Geg needed someplace else to live a long time ago. I would lik to say this situation is unique, but I think it respresents many situation.

[Nihilanthic]

No... tell them to go to a local bar and ask where the friends of dorothy hang out.

[Anonymous]

I want to thank "Bad Puppy" for what you said to me, and the Anonymous Unreg User (posted on 4-28-06), who says that he or she worked at a wilderness/reg program, and saw a similiar situation with mother and her son.  So, Anonymous user, I would like to talk to you more, but in order to do so, either you are going to have to go to ST, and post a message to me, or go through Lon or someone else there.  If you truly worked at a wilderness and other, I would like to chat with you some more, esp. since you seemed to have similiar experiences such as I have had.  Hope to hear from you somehow, or please post again to me hear.  Thanks!

[Anonymous]

On 2006-05-03 19:18:00, Anonymous wrote:

"

I am on anti-depressents, and panic pills and sleeping pills.

You should seek help for your drug problems. I know of several Ed Cons who can tell you a good place to go for a few years while you clean yourself up."

:nworthy:  :nworthy:  :nworthy:  :nworthy:

No shit!!  Damn, I read that post and at first thought it couldn't be real.  Sadly someone like this will never change.  She's too self-centered and has the martyr complex down to a 'T'.  That kid needs to put as much distance as is humanly possible between himself and that self-pitying, melodramatic pill junkie.  If he does it sounds like he'll be just fine.

[Anonymous]

Fuck, I was trying to be nice, and responding to those who responded to me nicely.  Something you obviously can't do.  I am not self-centered, but obviously, you are!

[Anonymous]

Sorry lady.  If you really did write this post then there's nothing nice about you.  Quit your crying, get off the drugs and stop blaming your pathetic failures in life on your kid.  ::boohoo::  The post quoted below is so outrageous that I thought it had to be a troll.  If it is, fuck off.  If the post is true, you're too fucking hopeless to waste any more time on.  Do your son a favor and stay the hell out of his life.  I say this in all seriousness.

On 2006-05-03 18:09:00, Anonymous wrote:

"Posted: 2006-04-28 17:03:00  

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 Hi everyone



I really need your help, suggestions and previous experience and whatever you can help me with. I am near tears.



Update, my son Greg went to a wilderness for 7weeks, starting July 7th, 2005, then graduated, and I was there and all was fine, I came home and he went to a TBS in Spokane, WA. He will graduate on June 9th. I will be there for that too (Greg's Dad and I have been divorced since 1992, and he has decided not to go, (*******)! sorry for the language.



Anyway, Greg, my son will turn 18 on May 2nd., but will stay at the TBS and graduate on June 8th, and then will come home with me for a few days and drive back to OR, in a car that his Father is giving him (like a 1980 something white jeep). He will also live with his other grandparents and get a job for the whole summer in Oregon.



I am on anti-depressents, and panic pills and sleeping pills. Greg is on spring break, no, not with me (in Anchorage, AK), but with his Fathers Mother and her husband in OR, to look at one Community College in particular.



Two days ago, I talked to my son, and this call was all about airline tickets. His father bought an airline ticket for Greg to come to Anchorage on June 10th. Fine, so I wanted to make sure that I was on the same flights, and I found out that Greg's flights had changed, flight numbers and times, and I wrote an e-mail to his Father to let him know, he in turn called Greg and told him to check it out, that I didn't know what I was talking about.



Then of course my son called me, and told me I didn't know what I was talking about, and I told him I had just talked to reservations, .....etc, anyway, my son got me so upset, and he sided with his Father (his Father moved Greg out of his house when Greg was only staying there at his Fathers for 2 nights a week), but Greg always sides with his Father, even if he is wrong. That night I had a hard time sleeping, and felt like I was going to crawl out of my skin again, it was horrible. Now I know why, and the next day I was sick, all because of what happened on the phone with my son.



Also, I have started seeing someone, as of December 26th, 2005, and he is very nice, and helpful. Anyway, Greg knows, and he keeps asking me about my man (Troy), and why he is at my house, and I say that we are having dinner together, and doesn't Greg want me to be happy, and not lonely, but Greg says, he doesn't like him (Greg has never met my boyfriend), and he doesn't need to be there. This all just hurts me once again, and Greg stands his ground.



It is happening all over again, and I don't like it at all.



Tonight on the phone, Greg's other grandparents took him to see one of the community colleges that Greg applied to (with a dorm). I called Greg to see how he liked it, and he said it was good, and got to see the whole campus and dorms and a room too. Then it was as though he questioned everything I said, and he said he might want to go somewhere where there wasn't a dorm, and I asked him how he was going to pay for all of this?? He didn't know, and I told him that he needs to live in a dorm, and it was why, why why, and all this, and Dam him, he is getting to me all over again.



Have any of you been through something like this, especially you single Mom's dating someone your son or daughter has not met and actually prob. never will.



Just everything is getting to me, and I am crying more, and things are hard, and it is my son, Greg who is getting to me.



I am going to his high school graduation on June 9th, and will get there on the afternoon of the 8th, and will get him shortly there after. If Greg continues to have so many questions, and keeps repeating them on and on, I am going to be a wreck. I am the only one going, his Father isn't going to go, wow, prob. because his Russian wife won't let him.



So, how do I not let my son, once again control my life, or make me feel badly, or worse yet, get me into a panic mode. My son makes me feel badly for being happy with a new boyfriend.



Thanks for listening everyone, sorry this is so long. Any suggestions, help, whatever, I would appreciate.



Thank you



Leslie

[Anonymous]

I hope it's real. She deserves to hurt.