Author Topic: speaking with John and Colleen  (Read 2369 times)

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Offline Anonymous

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speaking with John and Colleen
« on: April 04, 2006, 08:09:00 PM »
So has anyone actually had a chance to speak with them about some of the problems alumni have with the program?  Are they open to change?  Or do they still talk about people who have problems with the program as 'MMS Bashers' who are 'f-d up'?  

Does anyone know??  What do they say, what have you heard?
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline BarnardlyB

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speaking with John and Colleen
« Reply #1 on: April 04, 2006, 08:24:00 PM »
I have tried talking to Colleen about this site. She told me that they associate people who are involved with this site as girls against MMS. Which kinda poses a problem for me now doesn't it?
They don't agree, yet they have, when I was there been making alot of changes. Im not sure what goes on much anymore, we don't talk as much.
B
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Offline Anonymous

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speaking with John and Colleen
« Reply #2 on: April 04, 2006, 09:36:00 PM »
thats pretty indicitive of thier attitude towards addressing concerns. Any criticism is unacceptable and immediately catagorized as "bad"

Ohhh, I guess this will foster my so-called "bad kid" complex (a lovely pseudo-therapy term from John)

Annick
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Offline Anonymous

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speaking with John and Colleen
« Reply #3 on: April 04, 2006, 10:37:00 PM »
the last time I tried to say anything it became my problem
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Offline Anonymous

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speaking with John and Colleen
« Reply #4 on: April 05, 2006, 10:07:00 AM »
Quote
On 2006-04-04 17:24:00, BarnardlyB wrote:

 She told me that they associate people who are involved with this site as girls against MMS. Which kinda poses a problem for me now doesn't it?

They don't agree, yet they have, when I was there been making alot of changes. Im not sure what goes on much anymore, we don't talk as much.

B
"




Well, yea, I guess that's true.  We are against MMS's methods, but that kind of makes it sound like MMS is a separate entity from John, it's not.  It's not even a  larger entity... it's just John Mercer- that's it.  In all his false gradeur, self-elevated importance, his ignorance, and clear lack of knowledge and education. We have a problem with John... and a problem with Colleen too, she was complicit... catering to John, but sometimes just as aggressive too.  

She makes it sound like it's a bad thing to be critical!  Isnt' MMS about producing healthy young adults, ones who are strong and fiercly independent...unwilling to be taken advantage of or victimized- or address this when it occurs?  Um, nope- so that's the lie we reveal which is threatening, huh?

Perhaps, much in the
same way she has reacted to John and idea of 'the program'- that is, John's philosophical underpinnings- which, on their face, are born out of completely medieval notions of reform, she believes complete obedience is a good thing.  WE ARE AGAINST MMS- ha ha ha, don't make me laugh, that's such a childish response, wonder if she can even see that.  AS if it's that black and white and that response to criticism is anything beyond juvenile.

If my, say, boyfriend say to me something critical and I said, 'oh you're just against me' my b/f would look at me as if I were insane.  Well, I look at Colleen as if she must be completely out of touch... and this is someone who heavily influences the running of school (with John's permission, of course)?  what a joke this program is, or rather, the people who run it are.  That's what it is, an f-n ridiculous joke of a program.

Certainly seems like John has a hard time functioning w/o being surrounded by people like that- I don't' know that he can have it any other way. I'm sure Mike and John's falling out had much to do with Mike's lack of deferrment.  Gary, on the other hand, was hopeless... never once did I see him address John in a manner that suggested he had the balls to challenge John's insanity.  J was such a jerk off though, so it's hard to imagine actually agreeing to go into business with him...
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Offline Anonymous

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speaking with John and Colleen
« Reply #5 on: April 05, 2006, 09:58:00 PM »
Quote

If my, say, boyfriend say to me something critical and I said, 'oh you're just against me' my b/f would look at me as if I were insane.  Well, I look at Colleen as if she must be completely out of touch... and this is someone who heavily influences the running of school (with John's permission, of course)?  what a joke this program is, or rather, the people who run it are.  That's what it is, an f-n ridiculous joke of a program.
<
"


No kidding, if I respond to criticism by saying you're just against me, that's personalizing and also incredibly dismissive and defensive.  IF you run a  program you should back up what your doing with evidence and fact.  Because John and Colleen can't do that, they resort to calling us the worse of the worse name imaginable, being labeled as someone who is 'against the program'  GASP!!  Oh no!  In MMS world, that is, John and Colleen land, that's the worst thing you can ever be.  

So, SHAME ON ALL OF YOU FOR STANDING UP FOR YOURSELVES AND NAMING THE MISTREAMENT WE ALL ENDURED.  YOU SHOULD ALL BE GRATEFUL FOR MMS AND ALL THEY HAVE DONE FOR YOU, EVEN IF THEY REALLY HURT YOU, THE NERVE!  THE GALL!  WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?! JUST SOME F-D UP TEEN WHO BECAME A F-D UP ADULT, AS DEMONSTRATED BY YOUR UNGRATEFUL CRITICISM DIRECTED AT THE SCHOOL. BAH, all you MMS bashers!!!!  

AS WE ALL KNOW LIE=TRUTH AT MMS. IGNORANCE=TRUTH...

If we knew any better, we would ALL recognize the absence of evidence based practices at MMS.  We would all recognize that the methods employed have proven to be harmful in studies.  WE would know this, but many can't bring themselves to even consider verabalizing this to them... bc that makes us, against MMS.  and that's real bad.  makes us real bad people. BAD BAD BAD- GUILT GUILT GUILT SHAME SHAME SHAME.
 
yes, a joke indeed.  deadly joke for some.
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Offline Anonymous

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speaking with John and Colleen
« Reply #6 on: April 06, 2006, 03:21:00 PM »
this has become a heated topic for me personally.  so i thought i'd throw in something.  i've on a couple occasions tried ot talk to colleen, but it always seems to end up turning on me.  or she somehow gets me to feel sorry for her because everyone is ganging up on them.  it's ridiculous and i wish sometimes that i was a bit more aggressive with her, but i've given up. i'm still considered a "good" alumni i guess, and i think it is because they still have a strange power over me.  stand up for myself, right?  well, it's harder than it sounds.  it's really sad that they can't back up their wonderful school, all they can do is get defensive when anything negative at all is said.  i don't understand why, if so many girls feel this way, they don't listen?  dont' try to change?  don't apologize?  things did turn out okay for me in the end, which i'm becomign more and more grateful for after reading all these posts.  it's been a battle for me to reconcile those two differences, my experiences and those negative ones of others... it all seemed confusing, but now i understand that people really do feel hurt by this power crazed man, john, and something should be done so it doesn't continue happening.  

girls that young are fragile, and shouldn't be scared into being good, but should be nurtured and loved and shown compassion for.  i think the entire reason i acted out in the first place was because i didn't love myself, i felt unloved by others, and felt worthless.  how can yelling at me and telling me i'm wrong all the time get me to develop into a normal balanced person?  for the most part i've figured it out, and i dont' really blame any current issues on something that happened over 6 years ago now, but it's still a problem for so many.  

sorry to blab, i've just been thinking a lot about this lately.

-s
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Offline Anonymous

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speaking with John and Colleen
« Reply #7 on: April 06, 2006, 10:13:00 PM »
Quote
On 2006-04-06 12:21:00, Anonymous wrote:

"this has become a heated topic for me personally.  so i thought i'd throw in something.  i've on a couple occasions tried ot talk to colleen, but it always seems to end up turning on me.  or she somehow gets me to feel sorry for her because everyone is ganging up on them.  it's ridiculous and i wish sometimes that i was a bit more aggressive with her, but i've given up. i'm still considered a "good" alumni i guess, and i think it is because they still have a strange power over me.  stand up for myself, right?  well, it's harder than it sounds.  it's really sad that they can't back up their wonderful school, all they can do is get defensive when anything negative at all is said.  i don't understand why, if so many girls feel this way, they don't listen?  dont' try to change?  don't apologize?  things did turn out okay for me in the end, which i'm becomign more and more grateful for after reading all these posts.  it's been a battle for me to reconcile those two differences, my experiences and those negative ones of others... it all seemed confusing, but now i understand that people really do feel hurt by this power crazed man, john, and something should be done so it doesn't continue happening.  



girls that young are fragile, and shouldn't be scared into being good, but should be nurtured and loved and shown compassion for.  i think the entire reason i acted out in the first place was because i didn't love myself, i felt unloved by others, and felt worthless.  how can yelling at me and telling me i'm wrong all the time get me to develop into a normal balanced person?  for the most part i've figured it out, and i dont' really blame any current issues on something that happened over 6 years ago now, but it's still a problem for so many.  



sorry to blab, i've just been thinking a lot about this lately.



-s"


Thanks S, I understand and respect your predicament and think it takes a hell of a lot of courage to say what you've just said.  Hell of a lot.  It means a lot, at least to me, to hear from someone who considers (is this correct?) John to have mistreated many of us and who still took some benefit from MMS, acknowledge and validate these criticisms, rather than just become defensive as...well, john and colleen are.  

I think many people mimic them... and they are, perhaps not the best examples/role models, paticularly in this instance of...being able to take it in criticisms.

Although, S, after some thought on this issue (lol) I think that there would be legal implication to John and Colleen conceding to anything. Lack of education on their part, and in general the yelling and berratement... they are not kids, they are adults and the mistakes they made were really quite big- I would say so large that it probably cuased irreperable damage to some.  I'd be willing to bet my life that numerous girls have died because they did not ge the help they needed and the trauma at MMS pushed them over that edge... that was my experience- I was lucky I didn't die.  Despite being on a destructive path, this made life a lot more confusing and frightening for me. It's not joke, taking responsibility for harming so many teens struggling with mental health issues.

So in that sense, I'd like to think that perhaps they keep their internal fear/awareness that they've done something majorly wrong hidden.  Although, I have heard from recent alumni and it appears that, even if this is the case, this ideal- of John and Colleen having a silent revelation, has had no impact in the way John treats the group, so perhaps that hidden fear/awareness is too hidden!

It's just like... at this point you've got to just give it up already.  But, if they do change, even w/o acknowledging culpability, it means also aknowledging defeat, perhaps, in John's mind???  Like this is a battle of... wills?  who knows, that's kind of how i feel like John's mind works... I think we can agree on this, love him or hate him, John has a huge ego.

Anyway- thanks S!!!
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Offline Anonymous

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speaking with John and Colleen
« Reply #8 on: April 06, 2006, 10:14:00 PM »
from kat- above, can't sign on for some reason!
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