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Anonymous:

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On 2006-06-14 04:01:00, Anonymous wrote:

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i'm just curious to what you would do then if your son was coming home late for curfew every night and smells like pot and he had your car.  can you help me out here?

By the way. i am assuming you would not send a kid to boot cam just for the above scenario. i mean you dont know for sure the kid is even high. He just smells of the stuff. Even crims need to be proven guilty. Would you do that if you smelt beer on their breath? Also what time is the curfew? is it 9.30? if so what kid would not be a little late? If your post implies that you would immediately send them away for being late having perhaps smoked drugs 9you think) would it not occur to you say PARENT THE KID YOURSELF!
By taking the car keys and chatting about the legal and ethical dangers of driving under the influence of anything, you can keep the kid safe & you can give them the chance to earn back some trust.
What shits me to tears about the "programme" mentality is that as soon as a kid fucks up the loose their right to be a member of the family and  get "banished" and told they do not deserve their parents love! "you dont get to communicate because you disrespected your mom"
Even with setting limits or penalising youthful indiscresions i would be heartbroken to think that my kid felt that my love was conditional. There is a HUGE difference between taking away priveliges that a kid may not have the maturity to have for a short period of time & explaining why "Eg I just dont feel that you are safe. Show me otherwise for a few weeks then we will talk" & sending your kid the message that they have fucked up so badly that they dont deserve your love & cant be a member of the family until they change everything about themselveds & become the kind of citizen you want them to be. Parental love in all these damn places  (even the nice looking ones) is marketed as being so godamn conditional. What happened to the parrents door always being open!!!
Also
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