Topic: HLA apologies
brianv. posted 8/12/04 3:28 AM
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Recently, I made some comments on a post-reply website about Hidden Lake Academy that were untrue and immature. I thought that it would be funny to post up untrue things to have a laugh with my friends but all I did was look immature to the people who visit the website and to some of my friends. I apologize to anyone who has read my post ups and I regret doing them. I also apologize to Hidden Lake Academy and the staff, who work very hard to improve the lives of their students.
Brian A. Valdez
Nova posted 8/12/04 8:00 AM
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Hey man you are not in the program anymore... Who is going to consiquence you??? What is done is done and learn from it... Not to sound programized but that's how it is...
http://amazingforums.com/forum2/WWASPFORUM/forum.htmlwwasp forum
RobertBruce posted 8/15/04 6:35 PM
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Improve the lives of their students?
Are you kidding me? All those people cared about was money, and turning us into walking commericals nothing more. You have nothing to apologize to any of those bastards for nothing.
RAV posted 8/17/04 6:41 PM
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Money you say! When I was looking for a theraputic school for my son, HLA was the only school that didn't jump at the chance to take him. They asked for records, test results and time to study them. Only after this review did they tell me they would accept them. All the other schools and programs told me to send him (with a check pinned to his shirt) and they would take him. This school was a good match for us.
Deborah posted 8/19/04 6:20 PM
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If they reviewed 'tests' it must be because the child had some major problems and they were concerned about the safety of the other teens and/or liability.
They diagnosed my son with ODD on the spot, based on his father's complaints. They 'studied' nothing, because there was nothing to study. They were not the least bit interested in my feedback.
Such an austere placement was inappropriate and unnecessary for my son. An independent, third-party evaluation prior to placement would have shown this.
Should a 'boarding school' diagnose, admit, and provide 'expert' testimony that the child needs their 'treatment'?
That sounds more like a psych hospital. There is definitely a conflict of interest.
Robert- I could be wrong, but Brian's apology sounded coerced to me. As did the other apology- from Joe, I believe it was.
RobertBruce posted 8/20/04 7:20 PM
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Rav I can assure you there was at no time any sort of pre enrollment psychological evaluation for your son. Unless of course you want to count the strip search and cavity exam.
RAV posted 8/21/04 0:41 AM
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Mr. Bruce: Cavity exam? Are you just mistaken or are you a liar?
RobertBruce posted 9/4/04 7:27 PM
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Rav if you choose to remain ignorant of the reality of the situation you have placed your son in by all means go ahead. I mean after all its your son whom you are allowing to be scarred for life and your money which you are pissing away after all who am I to tell you what to do with your son or your money? On that same note however do not ever attempt to tell me I am lying or mistaken about something going on there. Strip searches along with cavity exams do go on there, that being the tip of a very big ice berg of things that you are putting your son through. In any case since I went there and you didnt and I know what Im talking about and you obviously dont, why dont you shut the hell up you stupid bitch?
former pg38 posted 9/5/04 11:15 PM
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Cavity exams you say? I went to HLA and never had that done. Either you are having some sick delusional fantasy or they just did it to you. Either way, I would probably get some help for that. Peace
RobertBruce posted 9/9/04 3:51 AM
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They never made you strip down and do cavity exams following returns from visits in searching for drugs? Or are you just pretending to have ever gone there?
Meritt K. Wherry posted 9/9/04 3:11 PM
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dude brian, im so proud of you. Now you'll only recieve a 4 day for disrespect.
deedee posted 9/11/04 1:21 AM
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I am considering trying to get help for my child at Hidden Lakes.. What about an honest rundown on the school
healed posted 9/11/04 4:20 PM
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You won't get it on any of these boards. there is nothing but anger and immaturity here, contact the schools directly or an ed consultant, please don't depend on these sites, you will only get the opinion of the angry, spoiled children that never finished the program because they got dismissed or convinced their parents that they are "better" or that "hla sucks", or "they learned their lesson and wont do ... again, but end up falling back into their old patterns eventually or initially especially if they convinced their parents because they know that their parents are weak and that the kids rule the roost...hla is a good school that does wonderful things and if your child is a good fit, it will save his/her life and your sanity.
former pg38 posted 9/11/04 4:27 PM
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RB. first off I don't have to pretend to do anything. second, a search is one thing... but a cavity exam would actually involve someone probing your asshole to look for something. I got searched. sorry for the confusion. peace
RobertBruce posted 9/12/04 8:31 PM
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pg38 think nothing of it. Healed you sound an awful lot like pg45. How are you able to make so many assumptions about people youve never met. Perhaps you needed a controlling enviornment where you underwent abuse and brainwashing, others of us did not need or want that, while others of us still actually finished the program and recognized it for what it truly was. Its to bad you bought into the brainwashing but I guess you werent strong enough to with stand it. Deedee if you want your son returned to you as a shell of what he once was having been physically and mentally abused by all means send him there, otherwise find another option.
Deborah posted 9/15/04 5:02 PM
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Dee Dee,
You will be discouraged from seeking information from ex parents and participants of any program who were not satisfied with their experience. I think this is bad advice. I would encourage you to seek information from all sources before making a decision. Yes, some ex participants are angry about their experience. If their allegations are true, their anger is justified. Ignore the unpleasant language, but pay close attention to their accounts of the experience and allegations. Use these accounts to compile a list of questions for the program.
You can not necessarily depend on the advice of an Ed Con. Many are former employees of programs and are therefore, not objective. The one who referred my ex knew nothing about the program- that they were not licensed or monitored by the state, knew nothing about their behavior modification techniques, was not familiar with their policies and if those policies were carried out in the manner they were described in the parent manual. She referred based on ?the owner?s reputation?. That is not sufficient.
To depend solely on the advice of a program or an Ed Con would not be wise. Both have an obvious conflict of interest because they stand to profit from the placement of your child. When making such an important decision one should do careful research. It is incumbent on the parent to ask hard questions of the program, questions regarding the policies and methods of modifying your child?s behavior. As your child?s advocate who has a vested interest in their well being, it would not be wise to go into this type of arrangement blindly trusting. You must determine if you are in agreement with the methods they will use, and monitor to ensure the methods are employed as they were presented to you. The best way to monitor is to maintain contact with your child, who the only person who can warn you of potential abuse or discrepancies.
My advice to you is to ask many hard questions of any program. Severing contact between the parent and child is typical with programs. Don?t be swayed to believe it is a good policy because ?they all do it?. Refuse to comply with this policy. Let the program know that you want unmonitored phone calls with your child, and do not want your child to be punished for reporting anything negative. Assure them that you can distinguish between truth and ?manipulation?. Any program that is operating ethically will not fear this. In most states it is unlawful to sever contact between parent and child unless a professional has determined that contact with the parent is not in the child?s best interest. Ask the program if their state has such a law and why they are violating it. Children sent to juvenile facilities are not restricted in this way- why would it occur in the private sector? The primary reason for severing contact, in my opinion, is two fold. One- to reduce attrition. Two- to set a precedent with the child. In order for the program to ?work?, the child must believe that the program has the ultimate authority. Your compliance with this policy directly and indirectly tells your child that you have indeed abdicated all parental authority to the program.
Ask the program if they post phone numbers for reporting abuse, and a public phone which your child may use to do so. No matter how ?good? the program is, there is always the danger of a staff member perpetrating abuse. Pedophiles are drawn to residential facilities for children. A program one of my sons attended has had two occurrences of this- one was my son?s dorm officer. My son reported him and he is now serving a 95 year sentence. Degrees and background checks are not sufficient, as he was working there under an alias. A parent can not be too cautious.
Make numerous visits to the program unannounced. Don?t be discouraged when you are asked to leave. This is another of the standard procedures- no visits except during scheduled events. Parents are typically not allowed on campus for months. Why? My opinion, is that they discourage contact until after the child (and parent) have been conditioned. The parent is conditioned to put their faith in the program and the child is conditioned- through punishment- not to report anything negative. If there is ample trust between you and your child it is likely that s/he will violate this rule and attempt to tell you what is going on. You would be wise to listen, and err on the side of caution.
Ask if they accept severely distressed kids or kids with a violent or criminal past. Review the demographics.
Ask how many of the participants actually leave for the regularly scheduled home visits, particularly in the first 9 months. For what reasons would home visits be denied?
Ask if participants have ever acquired illegal substances while in the program. How often has it occurred?
Ask how your child will be punished for x,y,z behavior. What is the child?s day like while on ?restriction?? Are the participants ever restrained? Is staff trained in de-escalation techniques? Then verify these things with your child on an ongoing basis.
How are their ?therapy? groups run? Will your child risk punishment if he does not divulge intimate details about himself before s/he is ready to do so? How much one-on-one time will my child have with his counselor/surrogate parent?
What is the policy for addressing a child who is grieving the loss of contact with his/her family? Would my child ever be punished for talking about home, or missing home? If so, why?
Are the children placed on restriction given fewer calories or less variety of nutritious foods? Is food every denied, or the time in which they have to eat, shortened? Do they take their meals with their peers? Will your child be allowed contact with peers? What physical work will your child be assigned to do? How long can a child remain on restriction?
If my child is reported to have violated a rule by another participant, how is it determined if s/he is indeed guilty? Do your staff members apologize to the children when they have made a mistake or unjustly accused and punished someone?
How do they reprimand their staff for violations of ethics and policies? Is a parent notified when this occurs?
If any staff member tells your child that you do not love him/her, or that you support everything the program does, pull him/her immediately and ask questions later. The only people who know what is occurring on a daily basis is staff and your child. It would be unwise to completely discount your child?s reports and allegations. If you are uncertain about a particular policy or method, consult with an independent, third party, professional for advisement.
This should give you a place to start. And never forget that you are your child?s best advocate, his/her only contact with the outside world once enrolled in a residential program. Don?t let anything sever that contact. Despite the conflict and strife between the two of you, it is very damaging to what trust may remain, and there is absolutely no reasonable or rational reason to do so.
Scott Love posted 9/24/04 8:49 PM
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HLA is sick! If you want to have a good time, go to HLA for a couple of years. It was so much fun! I even got to go to group therapy for over 2 hours 3 days a week so my parents insurance couldn't cover anything due to such a large sum of therapy. BUt don't worry, it helped me a lot. I am not the least bit angrier since i've been there and by them yelling at me and doing ridiculous things, it totally made me want to say sober. I also like the twacked out night staff all looking up at me at like 2 in the morning. That is what it's about right? The only bad parts about it are that I got to smoke weed and get with a bunch of crazy ass bitches once in awhile.(yall know who you are) Too bad I had to meet a bunch of kids from all over the east and south too. bummer, that's another problem about HLA, getting connections all over the map. Westside bitches Valdez your my boy blue
Merritt K. W. posted 9/28/04 6:48 PM
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scott did you get to leave??
http://www.picturetrail.com/gallery/vie ... &members=1 Jeremy D posted 10/10/04 6:42 PM
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yo wtf brian? what are u apologizing for. I get high , stay high and get crunk my friends. thanks HLA!
Scotty L posted 10/14/04 9:10 PM
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Fuck yeah i'm out, i've been out for like 2 and a half months. What up diermier, yeah i like those words.
Tessa posted 10/20/04 11:06 PM
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Lovie!!Hey your out hell yeah!!!!Isnt it badass being out!!!! I wanna get in contack with you!!!! Congrats to all who are free!!!
Francesca posted 11/11/04 1:52 AM
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um okay wow i'm definitely getting sent to this HLA place very soon and i really have no idea how to act..like dont talk..ignore everyone...act like nothing fazes me..so maybe my parents will realize this fucking school isnt gonna change me into some abstinent, sober, drug free, boring ass no partying loser who does homework all day and only worries about grades...HELP..really what should i do???
Rufus posted 11/22/04 11:21 PM
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RobertBruce:
Dude! It looks like anger management wasn't on the cirriculum at HLA. Invest in a shrink, you'll get over this a lot faster. Move on with your life, brother
Rufus posted 11/24/04 0:18 AM
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Francesca: What do you call an "abstinent, sober, drug free, boring ass no partying loser who does homework all day"? How about a productive member of society? Grow up and get a life!
RAV posted 11/25/04 3:13 AM
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Rufus: Be careful with this Bruce guy. He might call you a "stupid bitch". When someone cannot make a valid, intelligent point, or defend their position, they resort to name calling. It's a very mature approach. And we can all tell by reading Mr. Bruce's posts that he's a very mature, self realized person.
THuG NaSTy(Wete Pinnaker) posted 11/30/04 9:17 PM
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P Dubs up in this shit. HLA changed me from a petty thug in to a world reknown gd' up gangster! When I get out of HLA i'm gonna bust caps up in lott sove from my rival gang. O florida represent! Get crunk and smoke lighter fluid and computer cleaner bitches. HLA is the coolest! I'm coming out with a new CD with the illest flows yall. It's entitled "N.A.R.C. the true story of a snitch named P dubs what what"
RobertBruce posted 1/3/05 5:42 AM
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Rufus to tell you the truth I think signing on to that class action suit against HLA would be more theraputic.
Rav- Im sorry did my point about the fact that I actualy went there and you didnt not come across elequently enough? Or the fact that I know what Im talking about when we discuss the atrocities committed by HLA and you dont? Face facts you just dont like to admitt being wrong, get over it and save your son while you still can. Oh and even though I have made my point and you have baseless argument youre still a stupid bitch.
Rufus posted 1/4/05 3:28 AM
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RobertBruce: RAV's right! You're an angry MF. Chill, bruce; get a life. Leave RAV out of it. You're the one who's hurting and needs help, dude!
Deborah posted 1/5/05 0:43 AM
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Robert,
What class action against HLA are you speaking of?
GUEST posted 1/6/05 1:09 AM
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Has anyone ever considered the fact that HLA would be a perfect money laundering front?
Deborah posted 1/6/05 1:17 AM
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Guest: you're an idiot
RobertBruce posted 1/6/05 6:45 PM
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Rufus, do you feel so igsignifigant that you have to repeat yourself three times just to be noticed? Perhaps you fell victim to the brainwashing at HLA, its okay to be angry no ones going to "fall out" on your here. Youre in a safe place.
Deborah- Is there a way I can get ahold of you off the board?
Deborah posted 1/7/05 5:40 PM
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Robert,
Come over to Forntis and private message me. That is a much better venue. Ginger would be happy to put up a forum specific to HLA if there is enough interest. That forum is not going away, doesn't have pop ups, and jerks can't pose as other people.
What do I mean? I wrote the message inquiring about the class action. I did not write "Guest- you're an idiot". What fun and games. Who would have a vested interest in doing such a thing?
Robert, Go to:
http://fornits.com/wwf/Select an anonymous tag, if you prefer, and send a private message to Deborah.
Guest posted 1/7/05 11:12 PM
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Deborah thanks for clarifying. I think many people use the "guest" name on this board. I will also head over to fornits. I did send an email to you a few days back. However, it may be an old address? My comment on here was somewhat in jest...will explain privately if you would like.
RobertBruce posted 1/9/05 9:43 PM
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I woke up today feeling tremendous remorse. I've offended many people on this message board and I am deeply sorry. I realize now what they were trying to teache me at HLA and I failed to learn. My only regret is that they won't take me back.
RobertBruce posted 1/9/05 9:54 PM
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Deborah I sent you a private message on the other board. Get back to me.
jeff posted 1/10/05 9:48 PM
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Why don't you all try harder at being better parents.
RobertBruce posted 1/10/05 11:44 PM
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why would I regret having never been brainwashed by that concentration camp. Its to bad the person having to pose as others was to weak minded to be able to withstand that.
Legend posted 2/5/05 4:51 AM
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wassup y'all? i have been at HLA for 46 12 monthes. Yeah, i know everyone from peer group 30's grad onward. they are currently working of pg 75. Valdez, wha the hell happened? Diermier wassup? Love how you been? Merrit, word is , that you are at RCi. and all the rest of you. oh, for all of you who haven't guessed who i am yet, it's me Gioia. sup.
yoshi posted 4/1/05 1:35 AM
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HLA can suck my big fat russian dick. i got out and thank god....now my life is soooo much better with the DRUGS. lol. any pussy ass mother fucker who tries to apologize and suck up to the school should be flogged and killed.
karma posted 4/1/05 2:04 AM
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That would be funny as shit if merritt were at RCI!!!
49 posted 4/9/05 2:02 AM
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Gioia is still there?
karma posted 4/10/05 3:21 AM
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oh yeah!!! he is leaving in May though.
XedgeX posted 4/13/05 5:24 AM
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how long does it take an edge kid to break his vow?
as soon as you turn your back!
THREAD CLOSED AFTER THIS MESSAGE
