Author Topic: Oh come one,I'm tied and bored adn can't sleeep  (Read 2573 times)

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Offline Cayo Hueso

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Oh come one,I'm tied and bored adn can't sleeep
« on: November 24, 2005, 02:05:00 AM »
teell me a joke, damn......something!

I turned to speak to God, About the world's despair; But to make bad matters worse, I found God wasn't there.
--Robert Frost, American poet

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t. Pete Straight
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Offline Anonymous

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Oh come one,I'm tied and bored adn can't sleeep
« Reply #1 on: November 24, 2005, 02:18:00 AM »
maybe you should get untied if you want to sleep.
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Offline Anonymous

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Oh come one,I'm tied and bored adn can't sleeep
« Reply #2 on: November 24, 2005, 02:19:00 AM »
and a better partner if yer bored.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Cayo Hueso

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Oh come one,I'm tied and bored adn can't sleeep
« Reply #3 on: November 24, 2005, 02:39:00 AM »
Quote
On 2005-11-23 23:18:00, Anonymous wrote:

"maybe you should get untied if you want to sleep."


thanks, that's helpful!!   I didn' mean that  as snotty as it souonded...  I'm wayyyyyyyyyyy tired adna little loopy.  Apologies. :wave:

Arms in the hands of citizens [may] be used at individual discretion...in private self-defense...
-- John Adams, (1788)

« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
t. Pete Straight
early 80s

Offline Cayo Hueso

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Oh come one,I'm tied and bored adn can't sleeep
« Reply #4 on: November 24, 2005, 02:45:00 AM »
Quote
On 2005-11-23 23:19:00, Anonymous wrote:

"and a better partner if yer bored."


Husband is covering the San Fran game.   Sucks when he's gone, but DAMN do we make up for it!!! :grin:

Commerce with all nations, alliance with none, should be our motto.
--Thomas Jefferson

« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
t. Pete Straight
early 80s

Offline PerfectStraightling

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Oh come one,I'm tied and bored adn can't sleeep
« Reply #5 on: November 24, 2005, 02:50:00 AM »
Sigh...me too. Two days off from work and my whole sleeping schedule has been ruined! :wink:

How about these jokes:

What's the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner?

The turKEY

Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?

The outside

What kind of music did the Pilgrims like?

Plymouth Rock

What did the turkey say before it was roasted?

Boy! I'm stuffed!

Why do turkeys always go, "gobble, gobble"?

Because they never learned good table manners!


I know, I know...Just thought I'd add some thanksgiving spirit here! Ha ha :wink:
[ This Message was edited by: JMA on 2005-11-23 23:51 ]
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Offline PerfectStraightling

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« Reply #6 on: November 24, 2005, 03:09:00 AM »
Ok these are a little better:

Things to Do to Liven Up Thanksgiving Dinner

1. Load your plate up high, then take it to the kitchen, toss it all in the blender, and take your "shake" back to the table. Announce that it's the new Thanksgiving Weight Loss Shake.

2. When everyone goes around to say what they are Thankful for, say, "I'm thankful I didn't get caught" and refuse to say anything more.

3. Bring along old recorded football games, pop them in the VCR when Dad's not looking. Make sure it is set to the last two minutes of the game. When he comes into the room, turn off the VCR and turn on the regular TV.

4. Bring a date that only talks about the tragic and abusive conditions known to exist at turkey farms.

5. During mid-meal turn to mom and say, "See mom, I told you they wouldn't notice that the Turkey was past expiration date. You were worried for nothing."
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #7 on: November 24, 2005, 03:41:00 AM »
I clicked here:
http://peta.org/

Then I clicked:
10 reasons not to eat Turkey

http://www.goveg.com/f-top10turkeys.asp

Top 10 Reasons Not to Eat Turkeys

Pardon me, pilgrim! This Thanksgiving, how about ditching the dead bird? These beautiful, inquisitive, intelligent birds endure lives of suffering and painful deaths. Here are 10 good reasons to carve out a new tradition by flocking to vegetarian entrées, along with some scrumptious holiday cooking tips and recipes?thankfully, none of them require stuffing food up anyone's behind.

Life and Death for Factory-Farmed Turkeys

1 They're Begging Your Pardon
Turkeys are ?smart animals with personality and character, and keen awareness of their surroundings,? Oregon State University poultry scientist Tom Savage says. Turkeys are social, playful birds who enjoy the company of others. They relish having their feathers stroked and like to chirp, cluck, and gobble along to their favorite tunes. Anyone who spends time with them at farm sanctuaries quickly learns that turkeys are as varied in personality as dogs and cats. The president ?pardons? a turkey every year?can't you pardon one too? Learn more about turkeys.

2 Get Rid of Your Wattle
Turkey flesh is brimming with fat. Just one homemade patty of ground, cooked turkey meat contains a whopping 244 mg of cholesterol, and half of its calories come from fat. Research has shown that vegetarians are 50 percent less likely to develop heart disease, and they have 40 percent of the cancer rate of meat-eaters. Plus, meat-eaters are nine times more likely to be obese than vegans are. Learn more about animal products and your health.

3 Can You Spell ?Pandemic??
Experts are warning that a virulent new strain of bird flu could spread to human beings and kill millions of Americans. The Bush administration is trying to deal with the problem, but experts warn that current factory-farm conditions, in which turkeys are drugged up and bred to grow so quickly they can barely walk, are a prescription for disease outbreaks. Eating a turkey carcass contaminated with bird flu could kill you, and currently available drugs might not work. Cooking should kill the virus, but it could be left behind on cutting boards and utensils and spread through something else you're eating. Learn more about bird flu.

4 Recall Process Doesn't Fly
The U.S. government is the only government in the Western world that does not have the power to recall contaminated animal products. Instead, American consumers must trust the profit-hungry meat, dairy, and egg industries to decide when recalls are necessary. Dan Glickman, secretary of agriculture under President Bill Clinton, explained that this limit on the U.S. Department of Agriculture's (USDA) power to protect consumers from tainted animal products is ?one of the biggest loopholes out there.? There are all sorts of killer bacteria found in turkey flesh, including salmonella and campylobacter. The Center for Science in the Public Interest found that 28 percent of fresh turkeys were contaminated with bacteria, primarily with campylobacter, for which the USDA does not even require testing. Learn more about meat contamination.

5 Let the Turkeys Give Thanks!
Let's face it: If you're eating a turkey, that's a corpse you've got there on the table, and if you don't eat it quickly enough, it will decompose. Is that really what we want as the centerpiece of a holiday meal: an animal's dead and decaying carcass? Thanksgiving is a time to take stock of our lives and give thanks for all that we have, so why not let the turkeys give thanks too? Learn more about what happens to turkeys on factory farms.

6 Want Stuffing With Your Supergerms?
Dosing turkeys with antibiotics to stimulate their growth and to keep them alive in filthy, disease-ridden conditions that would otherwise kill them poses even more risks for people who eat them. Leading health organizations?including the World Health Organization, the American Medical Association, and the American Public Health Association?have warned that by giving powerful drugs (via animal products) to humans who are not sick, the farmed-animal industry is creating possible long-term risks to human health and will spread antibiotic-resistant supergerms. That's why the use of drugs to promote growth in animals used for food has been banned for many years in Europe. Learn more about antibiotics used in animal products.

7 Without a Wing and a Prayer
On factory farms, turkeys live for months in sheds where they are packed so tightly that flapping a wing or stretching a leg is nearly impossible. They stand in waste, and urine and ammonia fumes burn their eyes and lungs. At the slaughterhouse, turkeys have their throats slit while they are still conscious. Those who miss the automated knife are scalded to death in the defeathering tank. Learn more about the cruelty endured by turkeys.

8 Foul Farming
Anyone who has driven by a farm has probably smelled it first from a mile away. Turkeys and other animals raised for food produce 130 times as much excrement as the entire U.S. human population?all without the benefit of waste treatment systems. There are no federal guidelines to regulate how factory farms treat, store, and dispose of the trillions of pounds of concentrated, untreated animal excrement that they produce each year. Learn more about how factory farming damages the environment.

9 Blood, Sweat, and Fear
Killing animals is inherently dangerous work, but the fast line speeds, the dirty, slippery killing floors, and the lack of training make animal-processing plants some of the most dangerous places to work in America today. The industry has refused to slow down the lines or buy appropriate safety gear because these changes could cut into companies? bottom lines. In its 185-page exposé on worker exploitation by the farmed-animal industry, ?Blood, Sweat, and Fear: Workers? Rights in U.S. Meat and Poultry Plants,? Human Rights Watch explains, ?These are not occasional lapses by employers paying insufficient attention to modern human resources management policies. These are systematic human rights violations embedded in meat and poultry industry employment.? Learn why Human Rights Watch calls meat-packing ?the most dangerous factory job in America.?

10 A Cornucopia of Turkey Alternatives
Give up the giblets and carve out a new tradition this Thanksgiving?Tofurky Roast and UnTurkey, savory soy- and wheat-based roasts with stuffing and gravy or oven-roasted, peppered, hickory-smoked, or cranberry- and stuffing-flavored Tofurky Deli Slices. Give animals and yourself something to be really thankful for this year: Order a free vegetarian starter kit full of tasty recipes and celebrity features today!
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #8 on: November 24, 2005, 03:51:00 AM »
http://www.petatv.com/tvpopup/Prefs.asp ... rley_jones

?Life and Death for Factory-Farmed Turkeys,?
With Shirley Jones

Shirley Jones, matriarch of The Partridge Family, exposes cruelty to turkeys on factory farms and in slaughterhouses.

For related information:
http://www.goveg.com/
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Offline starry-eyed pirate

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« Reply #9 on: November 24, 2005, 11:02:00 AM »
i don't buy meat in the store.  i don't really eat meat except on rare occaisions or if i am a guest somewhere and meat is bein' served.  i'll eat wild meat that's been hunted because i don't think it's wrong to eat meat that has come from wild animals but i do think that the livestock industry is about as fucked up as they come.  Wasn't it Gandhi who said you can judge a civillization by the way they treat their animals ??  i think so.  Gandhi was so cool.  Happy Thanksgivin' survivors.  Peace and Love to ya!
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
If you would have justice in this world, then begin to see that a human being is not a means to some end.  People are not commodities.  When human beings are just to one another government becomes obsolete and real freedom is born; SPIRITUAL ANARCHY.

Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #10 on: November 24, 2005, 01:16:00 PM »
Quote
On 2005-11-23 23:45:00, Cayo Hueso wrote:

"
Quote

On 2005-11-23 23:19:00, Anonymous wrote:


"and a better partner if yer bored."




Husband is covering the San Fran game.   Sucks when he's gone, but DAMN do we make up for it!!! :grin:

Commerce with all nations, alliance with none, should be our motto.
--Thomas Jefferson

"


Ah. I knew you had a pedophile in cohorts with your child games. So, like, do you and he put the neighborhood children in the attic or garage when you are away at work - or do you still get SSI and spend the day with them at home?
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Offline Cayo Hueso

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« Reply #11 on: November 24, 2005, 01:18:00 PM »
Huh?  Got grown children out of the house darlin'.  Pay attention.

If there must be trouble, let it be in my day, that my child may have peace.
--Thomas Paine

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t. Pete Straight
early 80s

Offline PerfectStraightling

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« Reply #12 on: November 24, 2005, 02:46:00 PM »
Are you suggesting that we bring this list to Thanksgiving dinner or what?
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Offline Antigen

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Oh come one,I'm tied and bored adn can't sleeep
« Reply #13 on: November 24, 2005, 03:00:00 PM »
I wouldn't suggest that. But maybe look into a source for free range poultry.

It is wrong to leave a stumbling stone in the road after it has tripped you.
http://fornits.com/wwf/bb_profile.php?mode=view&user=1005' target='_new'>Hands Out Light

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"Don\'t let the past remind us of what we are not now."
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Offline PerfectStraightling

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« Reply #14 on: November 24, 2005, 05:53:00 PM »
Ha ha, if you want to talk to my dad about it :smile: If you knew him you would know how funny that is. Even the mere suggestion would send him off.

Of course, I eat meat too. I've considered being a vegetarian for those same reasons, but it is hard to make sure that every time I eat there is no meat or the meat comes from Whole Foods. I respect those that can do it, but I'm just not cut out for it.
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