Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > The Seed Discussion Forum
especially for Marshall, Greg,
Thom:
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On 2005-09-23 08:08:00, Antigen wrote:
" ::boohoo::
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SMiamiPimp:
John,
Thanks for the posts! I agree with your description of the devastation.
NOT12NOW:
Dear John,
The first time I noticed that a staff member was on this site (you) I was really excited. I read your post and all the posts that follow carefully. When I was done I added my own thoughts.
The other day I logged on and saw a new thread started by john underwood again, and again many posts in response followed it. I started to read the thread but was surprised to find it didn?t engage me. You just say the same shit over and over. Have you read anything anyone has written here?
I guess I just don?t care anymore if anyone on the staff ever ?gets it.? I don?t have to care. I survived your abuse. The long list of dead doesn?t scare me anymore. I know what it means to be a seed success, after all I used to be one, and quite honestly I?d rather be dead than still be a seed drone.
I care about understanding what happened to me so I can be free of it. I care about the other brave people sorting it out on this site. I care about stopping other programs that grew out of the seed so no other scared twelve-year-old goes through what I did. I long to apologize to my newcomer. And I don?t need you to do any of those things.
The only reason for you to accept the fact that you damaging some scared kids is to heal yourself.
Good luck finding you heart.
Antigen:
--- Quote ---On 2005-11-21 11:03:00, NOT12NOW wrote:
I know what it means to be a seed success, after all I used to be one, and quite honestly I?d rather be dead than still be a seed drone.
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I hear ya! I remember thinking that when I first ran from home cause I had gotten wind that my mom was trying to put me in the Program. And, again, when I finally escaped two years later. To some extent, I believed the propaganda about turning into a pathetic junkie if I broke w/ the Program. But I had decided it was worth it. The horror stories were, after all, an unknown. I couldn't explain it to anybody what was so awful that I felt the need to go and get myself lost in the world. But the urge was overwhelmingly strong, none the lese.
Some times the devil that you know is so unbearably horrible that the devil that ya' don't know starts looking pretty damned good!
Thank GOD it was all just fear mongering! Here I am, 20 odd years later, stubornly happy, healthy and successful despite having rejected the Program in total.
If you believe that people cannot be trusted to govern themselves,
then can they be trusted to govern others?
--Thomas Jefferson
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