I do not have to "forgive" Straight, or perform any other mental contortions. Anger is a perfectly acceptable emotion to feel, as are rage and frustration in the face of such crimes. especially since they have not yet been addressed and reparated. That's life. I'm pissed at the Feds, too, at that smirking little turd in the White House, etc. This anger and disgust makes me a better public speaker, it makes me read stuff and talk to people and set up web forums and so on.
I would not even describe my feeling about Straight as "hate". That is too elementary.
Straight is not even a person. How can I forgive an institution?
Look, my point is, you guys are so uncomfortable with anger. Get pissed at what they did to you. If you want to forgive someone for real, go talk to that Staff person who is the bane of your existence in your mind. Clear it up. You might find they are still a jerkoff and still hurting children. You might find they have no sympathy, or you might find they are completely okay talking to you, and will set the story right about what Straight was doing to you, and accept "blame" - another word that is unfairly discriminated against.
I am saying, you are giving up a huge source of energy and power by giving up anger and other "negative" feelings. I can't blame you for not wanting to feel them and know where they come from. That is some intense history.
Maybe you are afraid that if you keep feeling these feelings you will go crazy or hurt someone. No, you will grieve. Under the rage about being beltlooped is intense humiliation and helplessness. Under the anger towards our parents, there is devastation and grief. They signed you over to be abused. I understand people want to have their families back. This should never be at the expense of the truth, at least you have to know the truth in your mind, or what you are doing by making peace is just tucking your tail, it's a lie.
I worry that some of you are "working your program". You were abused. You are under no obligation from God or anyone to "get over it". You don't get any brownie points, except maybe from other people with the same philosophy. You do not have to feel guilty for your hatred and anger.
Sometimes it's just the top of grief.