Ridiculous

[Antigen]

On 2005-08-18 09:16:00, Anonymous wrote:

"But what system really works?  I was sent to...

How about a couple of months touring Europe or the great outdoors or whatever with your mother? Wouldn't that have kept you away from bad influences, given you time to cool your heels?  

Screening pre-school kids for anti-social behavior is about as useful as screening the Christian Coalition for sanctimonious behavior.
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&ned=us&ie=UTF-8&q=sanho+tree&btnmeta%3Dsearch%3Dsearch=Search+the+Web' target='_new'>Sanho Tree

[Anonymous]

No that probably wouldn't have worked being that my father had just died and my teen sister was pregnant and my mom had a lot to deal with, and I would have been able to find drugs anywhere Europe included.

[Anonymous]

There is no perfect solution, you are right. No such thing exists, in spite of the fact that it would be nice to be sent away and come out fixed. Still, I would never condone a place like CEDU and its tactics.


Serb mentioned a good boarding school once that he attended after CEDU... Also, maybe an Outward Bound type program?

[Anonymous]

I hated CEDU just like everyone else, but I thank God at least I went somewhere where I could actually stay sober for 6 months.  My mom was just doing the best she could at the time.  When I was there I was trying to get into Juvinile Hall instead, but looking back I'm glad that plan of mine didn't work out.  I met some really great people there and nothing too horrible happened to me there so whatever live and learn, I could have been in much worse places...
Maybe you don't know what it's like to have a out of control child how old are you?  I have children of my own and I wouldn't send them to a place like CEDU, but I see how I drove my mom to extreme messures and at that point you just do the best you can.

[Anonymous]

I know Rod (Serb) we went to CEDU at the same time and I agree there are other options, maybe my mom should have researched a little more, but that takes time and I was highly suicidal and action had to be taken immediately, sometimes you just have to go with the flow and hope for the best, it's just the way life works sometimes.  I hope to learn from my experience and be more prepared should the occation arise in my own life with my own children.

[puma046]

CEDU changed significantly by closing. It just got a lot softer. Very little yelling by staff, shorter and considerably less intense raps, far more privileges, faster advancement through the program, cushy punishments, etc. Did it still suck, well of course.

Were the staff all playing stupid head games? Definitely! Was it hard to play the game right back? Most definitely not. And every year it got easier and easier to play the game. There was a line between showing the staff what they wanted to see and hear and turning into a "brainwashed" look good. But it wasn't hard to avoid crossing it if you ask me.

When I think back 3 years to Boulder Creek, all I can remember are the friends I had and the good times we shared trying to bend the rules as far as they would go. The best friends I've ever had.

[Son Of Serbia]

On 2005-08-18 10:04:00, puma046 wrote:



"When I think back 3 years to Boulder Creek, all I can remember are the friends I had and the good times we shared trying to bend the rules as far as they would go. The best friends I've ever had. "

I get what your saying.  You liked all the sneaking around and the danger aspect of it.  
I respect that.

However, You could have had the same sort of experience at any normal boarding school,without all the humiliation & mindfucking,and for a lot less money than what cedu overcharged your parents to "fix you."  

Furthermore, there was nothing special about cedu that facilitated making deeper or more sincere friendships. I made the exact same kind of friends that you did at summer camp. I've heard people swear that their army buddies are the best friends they ever had. My kid brother said the exact same thing about a guy in his fraternity.

Best friends can be made in any situation.
 

.


[ This Message was edited by: Son Of Serbia on 2005-08-18 12:45 ]

[shanlea]

I think that any type of intense situation is incredibly bonding whether your friendships develop in the army or at CEDU.  The reason why friendships seem to resonate more at CEDU is because all cults seek to bond the group together through isolation, highly contrived experenitials and intense interactions. After CEDU, you walk out into the real world and everything seems so pale by comparison. Who in the fuck do you relate to? That is why so many people who have been through the program have a difficult time acclimating afterward.  I've heard this from both sides, the pro and anti CEDU contigencies.

In spite of the rigors, isolation, and group identity that the army encourages, I've heard people say it was a cakewalk after all the mindfucking at CEDU.

[Anonymous]

On 2005-08-18 10:04:00, puma046 wrote:

"CEDU changed significantly by closing. It just got a lot softer. Very little yelling by staff, shorter and considerably less intense raps, far more privileges, faster advancement through the program, cushy punishments, etc. Did it still suck, well of course.



Were the staff all playing stupid head games? Definitely! Was it hard to play the game right back? Most definitely not. And every year it got easier and easier to play the game. There was a line between showing the staff what they wanted to see and hear and turning into a "brainwashed" look good. But it wasn't hard to avoid crossing it if you ask me.



When I think back 3 years to Boulder Creek, all I can remember are the friends I had and the good times we shared trying to bend the rules as far as they would go. The best friends I've ever had. "

How weird. I don't miss my friends from RMA at all, and I certainly don't consider my friends from high school to be the best friends I've ever had. I've found that the friends I have made in my adult years to have been built on a much more solid foundation of trust, understanding, and humor than any of my friends from high school.

They were good friends, though. We've just lost touch over the years. And I personally prefer to have friends where I don't have that association and constant reminder about RMA. Out of sight is out of mind.

[Roy]

Yep,
..to put them out of business, How sweet it is? All those assholes out of work - and all the while they paid me a good wage to expose them for what they really were.

Ok the Guys and Gals who joined me and all my other user names are likely not here anymore as they have been replaced by older, and newer, voices - They are good voices - not whiners, but it takes one to know one - doesn't it?

But thank all of you ex staffers (uneducated grandiose child abusers with false personas) who call us whiners for allowing me, one more time, to rub your faces in the fact that all 7 schools were closed by the same hand that abused all those kids. All you dumb fucks who believed in that cult - gone

Please let me know where you go to work next, so I can meet up with you and see what your latest psuedo-treatment is. I'm sure that I can do away with that too. Then we can "smoosh." Maybe I can treat you for that post traumatic strees that they left you with after they fucked you. And, Hey, that pit in your stomach sucks, doesn't it. And, you all now know how you made those kids feel. From me, A special hug for all you false professionals I worked with, even the executives with fake PhDs from the Diploma Mill, California Coast College. If you feel too much pain, take my advice and go to Dr Ulrich and get the usual HUGE dose of Zyprexa so you can be Zombees and be thankful you don't have the added burden of all those bullies pushing your buttons and putting you at tables for weeks and brainwashing you with that psuedo-therapuetic bullshit you called therapy. Now - piss off.  

Sincerely,
That little old maximus et. al.

[Anonymous]

I think you have made a very interesting point. I am a grandmother, and can remember vividly trying (usually successfully) to deceive our dorm housemother. I went to a Christian College in the 60's, and there were a lot of rules to be broken....most of us worked very hard on breaking as many as we could without getting caught and thrown out. I think this is a normal thing for teens to do, regardless of their environment. What is not normal, is that some continue to believe that they are unique in their endeavors to deceive and assert their independence. l wish they could all realize that a certain amount of rebellion is perfectly normal, and helps shape your life as an adult who doesn't take arbitrary shit and is courageous enough to be defiant in order to assert your beliefs...it's called having character, and is actively discouraged by all of these programs. I should shut up before someone decides to create a program for defiant grannys!

[Anonymous]

On 2005-08-18 12:11:00, Son Of Serbia wrote:



Furthermore, there was nothing special about cedu that facilitated making deeper or more sincere friendships. I made the exact same kind of friends that you did at summer camp. I've heard people swear that their army buddies are the best friends they ever had. My kid brother said the exact same thing about a guy in his fraternity.



Best friends can be made in any situation.

 


.





[ This Message was edited by: Son Of Serbia on 2005-08-18 12:45 ]"

I have to disagree, I think there was definitely something about cedu that made friendships that much deeper. The fact that it was hell. Now I'm not saying that's the only place it could go down like that. Your army reference is a perfect one. I'm just saying, when you go through a long, very miserable experience (or in the army, a long, very dangerous experience that puts a ton of influence on trust), the friends you make tend to be built on stronger bonds. You suffer so long and your friends are going through the same suffering, then it just inevitably brings you closer. I have some really good friends at college! But I really can't say I've found the same connection with them that I had with my best friends at bca.

[Son Of Serbia]

"I have to disagree, I think there was definitely something about cedu that made friendships that much deeper."
[/quote]

Everyone's entitled to have an opinion...Just make sure it's really yours.  

Cedu staff certainly pushed us to believe that nonsense, but that's all it is, nonsense.    

I remember Guy Bonanno insisting in the Brothers profeet rap that I never had a real friend before, because "cedu hadn't yet taught me what a real friend was."

I told Guy that was bullshit, and then he proceeded to lead the group in screaming at me about being dishonest, and afraid to shed my"image",followed by the usual accusations of being "dirty", and dire predictions about how my life will be a complete failure,and "I'll be dead before 18!" :lol:

Guy, if you're reading this, I'm 29 now, and I'm quite happy with the way my life is going.  

About MY BEST FRIEND:
I met my best friend when I was 9 years old, we grew up together, and now he's the godfather of my baby son.  He was one of the people, cedu told me was "never a friend"; but you know what? Unlike all of my "cedu friends":

 My best friend never ratted me out.  He never joined in and helped someone else verbally attack me.  My best friend never laughed when someone tried to publicly humiliate me by making cruel jokes at my expense. My best friend never pretended that "I don't Exist" and ignored me, soley because someone else told him he can't talk to me.  

My best friend would never betray me like that.  
No true friend would.

[puma046]

Well I'm sorry you had shitty friends at BCA. Or maybe you're just a shitty friend yourself, who knows? My best friends at boulder creek certainly didn't give a fuck about bans. Nor did any of them ever rat me out. Once again, everyone is different my main man Serb. Gotta remember that. I'm sticking by it...my best friends from bca are still the best friends I've ever had. I could give a fuck less if that makes sense to you.

[Anonymous]

If I were you I wouldn't waste my breath trying to explain the obvious here.  

Of course everyone is different, of course a program (flawed or not) where people are thrust together to examine truly basic issues of life and existence is going to facilitate people coming together in very profound ways--and of course that may lead to strong friendship.

The fact is some people are just naturally programmed to hold onto resentment more strongly than others.  To Serb it would be like a nervous breakdown, a personality melt-down even to face the fact that some good things happened at the CEDU schools.  

For the rest of us, holding onto the true things in one's own experience is enough, it isn't necessary to either villify or idealize these programs---it's enough that we used those times in our lives to find something good---and obviously this has often been lasting connections to others for a lot of us