Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > Brat Camp
Typical Day at Sagewalk
Anotherscaredmom:
Incredible! Thank you so much. That is only the second positive response I have seen on this website.
My son is very much an intellectual and I do try to reach him that way. But, he is also getting into much more trouble than it sounds like you were. And when he's not in school, our relationship is great. I took him out and homeschooled him for a year and he completely opened up again. But he wanted to return to school so i gave him that chance. As soon as he gets in that environment, he starts acting up. First at school, and then at home. When the school calls and says he is the angriest kid they've ever seen, what's he like at home? I say, he's not that way with me, until I start getting pressure from the school and sometimes police to
"straighten him out".
I have worked with the school extensively to get them to understand what works for him and they have in fact adopted some of it. But my biggest concern is that he seems completely unwilling to take any responsibility for his angry reactions or not doing any of his work. The rest of us are twisting ourselves into pretzels around him trying to make things work and he just isn't responding.
Once summer comes, (when some kids get into more trouble), he settles right down. He comes home on curfew, he helps around the house if I ask him to, and he laughs and joins in family things.
So, basically he has to learn how to own his own behavior. That's number one. And then he has to take responsibility for doing his job, and right now that is passing school. I have sat him down multiple times and patiently explained and listened and offered him various options for school. We have school choice so he could go to a smaller school, he could go to a private school, and I'm still willing to homeschool him if he wants to do that. Yet he insists he wants to stay in the school he's in, that he will just cause a ruckus if I send him somewhere else, and then we come up with an agreement and he breaks it every time.
On top of that, he's become a master of lying and manipulation. I didn't want to believe it because we had always been so close, but he will look me right in the eyes and lie to me with earnestness and sincerity.
I also know he is using drugs. As far as I know, nothing major. Just pot. But where is he getting the money for it? He doesn't have a job, won't take jobs I offer him, and I don't give him an allowance if he doesn't contribute something to the household, and he rarely does, and only if he wants money. That is about once every few months. His sister and I have both had money disappear from our wallets and our rooms.
To me, these seem to be drastic things. I was a rebellious teenager but there were lines I just didn't cross.
Anyway, there is so much more to the story, but mostly I just wanted to thank you for sharing your story. By the way, what did you think of your Dad kicking out your sister? See, I guess I would "place him" before I would want to throw him out. That seems so scary to me.
Take care!
Troll Control:
--- Quote ---On 2005-08-02 11:35:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
--- Quote ---
On 2005-08-02 11:13:00, Anonymous wrote:
"Are you trying to say that Carlbrook and Swift River are bad, abusive programs? Yes, Carlbrook requires wilderness prior to enrollment. It does not have to be SUWS. Hidden Lake has its own captive wilderness program. These schools have strong academics, excellent therapists and are well-run and safe. Are there imperfections with the programs? Sure. Show me a school- any kind of school- that is perfect.
The young man who left Carlbrook at 18 (in your link) is but one voice. Do you really think he is representative?
I am not going to go into the licensing debate. There are many reasons why a business of ANY kind chooses to resist licensing requirements. I have been involved in these kind of disputes in totally unrelated industries. It does not mean that they have something to hide or want to run an abusive organization. "
--- End quote ---
You seem to parse words similar to the way a lawyer might. Are you a lawyer by chance?"
--- End quote ---
Yes, an unemployed one with plenty of time to troll many threads here. Lack of knowledge about any of these programs won't stop her - she just lies and says she has "personal experience."
Oh, Karen. For shame.
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