If the church of your choice stinks, there are usually plenty of other churches that would be glad to have your spiritual business.
Many churches would think that the kid who was smoking and smooching would be the kid *most* in need of spiritual support in his life.
I guess it all depends on whether a particular church's purpose is to be a club for the people who think they're already saintly, or to provide spiritual help and support for those who (according to the behavior code of their religion) need to improve.
There's a difference between fellowship and attendance to hear options for better behavior--and to see examples of people who are living it.
But some churches find that beyond their members' capacity at their present level of spiritual growth. If their church is doing *something* to help the members be better people, I prefer not to judge them simply because they aren't managing to do *everything*.
It's a moment to lament that they haven't reached a higher stage in their spiritual growth, pray for them, and find another church.
That's a typically Wiccan response in how we look at our various Circles or Groves, and how we handle our people who are presently lacking in spiritual virtues we wish they had. I don't know how well it works for Christians, in practice.
If a particular Circle or Grove doesn't meet your spiritual needs, and you try and just can't work it out amongst yourselves, you find or make another one and pray for the growth of the people you have to leave to their own paths.
To provide that individualized support, our equivalent of churches tend to be small and have minimal infrastructure and budgets.
I can only speak from what I know.
Timoclea
