Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform > The Seed Discussion Forum
Physical Contact
cleveland:
Ginger,
We're unlikely to know, unless someone chooses to post their experiences here. I'm just trying to provoke discussion!
My personal experience was that the lack of an intimate relationship for many years left me relatively unequiped to jump into it successfully. After a false start or two, I consider myself lucky.
marshall:
From the link:
"The Moonies claim that the divorce rate among their arranged marriages is 10%. This compares favourably with America and most European nations but at what price?
Daniel O'Connell is a professor of Religious Psychology and he believes the Moonies' approach to marriage risks missing the central message of the marriage contract. He says, "I find it in fact a violation of the very nature of the marriage bond, which is a free contract between two parties. And it is the freedom of that contract which constitutes a very essential part of the bond."
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/special_repo ... /35377.stm
landyh:
--- Quote ---On 2005-06-06 14:18:00, cleveland wrote:
"OK, MGG dared me to post on this topic...so I will.
Physical contact/sexuality...
Guys and girls strictly segragated...Art made sly sexual jokes (Evie being 'healthy' - large breasted. Seed kids being celibates - whoops, celebrants! etc.) Anyway, we were all sexually pent up. I think guys to some extent and probably girls even more so got some of their sexual energy released thru same sex contact. Not sex, but touching and cuddling if you were a girl, and rough-housing if you were a guy. I wasn't very sophisticated at 19 but I knew some people were gay, even though I hadn't had a lot of knowing contact (any gay kid at my high school would take pains to hide it, except for one or two flamboyant kids who I didn't know at all well, and kind of embarrased me) but I knew there were gay kids at the Seed but it appeared that they were trying to be 'straight' sexually too. It must have been weird. But the straight kids were banned from all contact with the opp. sex except for: A. high status kids, who could date and marry with Art's permission and B. football. Ooh, football! The girls wore skimpy little bikinis which they made themselves. It was torture to see them, and play on the line against them. High status seed kids had other opportunities to hang out with the opp. sex, esp. if you were on staff or jr. staff. For the rest of us: saying 'hi' to the girl who served the warm coollaid and frozen PBJ sandwiches; once in a great while helping some girl carry something in or out of her car or maybe apt.
Masterbation - not supposed to do it, really. But...whoopsie.
And you were supposed to confess 'everything.' I found this to be a horror for me. Especially because you weren't supposed to have your head in the gutter...and because I did...
So yeah, girls and guys did some same sex touching/cuddling/hugging/kissing even, I remember...but no contact with the opp. sex. Lots of guilt, shame, confusion...
Although I have to say that being able to hug another guy w/o shame was a definite plus for me - maybe helped me be less homophobic.
There you go, MGG. "
--- End quote ---
Just to balance things out a bit when I was on 3rd ave at 9 there was no prohibition against hugging the between girls/guys and i don't remember any prohibition on boy / girl relationships once you were an old comer. To be honest I don't exactly remember what the rules were by the time I went to St Rd 84 but I don't remember it being quite as restrictive as what you guys are posting. At nine there was often kisses fo me from the girls. maybe I was excluded because they thought I was too young to worry about. Little did they know. I think those kisses were what made my experience the first time positive as much as anything else. Just being a cute kid made for alot of attention that i needed. Wish it was still that easy.:wink:
GregFL:
--- Quote ---On 2005-12-03 09:09:00, landyh wrote:
"
--- Quote ---
On 2005-06-06 14:18:00, cleveland wrote:
"OK, MGG dared me to post on this topic...so I will.
Physical contact/sexuality...
Guys and girls strictly segragated...Art made sly sexual jokes (Evie being 'healthy' - large breasted. Seed kids being celibates - whoops, celebrants! etc.) Anyway, we were all sexually pent up. I think guys to some extent and probably girls even more so got some of their sexual energy released thru same sex contact. Not sex, but touching and cuddling if you were a girl, and rough-housing if you were a guy. I wasn't very sophisticated at 19 but I knew some people were gay, even though I hadn't had a lot of knowing contact (any gay kid at my high school would take pains to hide it, except for one or two flamboyant kids who I didn't know at all well, and kind of embarrased me) but I knew there were gay kids at the Seed but it appeared that they were trying to be 'straight' sexually too. It must have been weird. But the straight kids were banned from all contact with the opp. sex except for: A. high status kids, who could date and marry with Art's permission and B. football. Ooh, football! The girls wore skimpy little bikinis which they made themselves. It was torture to see them, and play on the line against them. High status seed kids had other opportunities to hang out with the opp. sex, esp. if you were on staff or jr. staff. For the rest of us: saying 'hi' to the girl who served the warm coollaid and frozen PBJ sandwiches; once in a great while helping some girl carry something in or out of her car or maybe apt.
Masterbation - not supposed to do it, really. But...whoopsie.
And you were supposed to confess 'everything.' I found this to be a horror for me. Especially because you weren't supposed to have your head in the gutter...and because I did...
So yeah, girls and guys did some same sex touching/cuddling/hugging/kissing even, I remember...but no contact with the opp. sex. Lots of guilt, shame, confusion...
Although I have to say that being able to hug another guy w/o shame was a definite plus for me - maybe helped me be less homophobic.
There you go, MGG. "
--- End quote ---
Just to balance things out a bit when I was on 3rd ave at 9 there was no prohibition against hugging the between girls/guys and i don't remember any prohibition on boy / girl relationships once you were an old comer. To be honest I don't exactly remember what the rules were by the time I went to St Rd 84 but I don't remember it being quite as restrictive as what you guys are posting. At nine there was often kisses fo me from the girls. maybe I was excluded because they thought I was too young to worry about. Little did they know. I think those kisses were what made my experience the first time positive as much as anything else. Just being a cute kid made for alot of attention that i needed. Wish it was still that easy.:wink:"
--- End quote ---
In st pete, you couldn't express ANY interest in the opposite sex or you were in for some serious punishment. Even LOOKING at the other side of the isle could get you lambasted and come down on.
Lamby, could it be that when you were 9 you were treated with special care, and that is one reason all those memories are so positive?
Hell, I can't hardly remember anything that happened to me when I was 9, at least not in any way other than a general memory.
landyh:
--- Quote ---On 2005-12-03 09:23:00, GregFL wrote:
"
--- Quote ---
On 2005-12-03 09:09:00, landyh wrote:
"
--- Quote ---
On 2005-06-06 14:18:00, cleveland wrote:
"OK, MGG dared me to post on this topic...so I will.
Physical contact/sexuality...
Guys and girls strictly segragated...Art made sly sexual jokes (Evie being 'healthy' - large breasted. Seed kids being celibates - whoops, celebrants! etc.) Anyway, we were all sexually pent up. I think guys to some extent and probably girls even more so got some of their sexual energy released thru same sex contact. Not sex, but touching and cuddling if you were a girl, and rough-housing if you were a guy. I wasn't very sophisticated at 19 but I knew some people were gay, even though I hadn't had a lot of knowing contact (any gay kid at my high school would take pains to hide it, except for one or two flamboyant kids who I didn't know at all well, and kind of embarrased me) but I knew there were gay kids at the Seed but it appeared that they were trying to be 'straight' sexually too. It must have been weird. But the straight kids were banned from all contact with the opp. sex except for: A. high status kids, who could date and marry with Art's permission and B. football. Ooh, football! The girls wore skimpy little bikinis which they made themselves. It was torture to see them, and play on the line against them. High status seed kids had other opportunities to hang out with the opp. sex, esp. if you were on staff or jr. staff. For the rest of us: saying 'hi' to the girl who served the warm coollaid and frozen PBJ sandwiches; once in a great while helping some girl carry something in or out of her car or maybe apt.
Masterbation - not supposed to do it, really. But...whoopsie.
And you were supposed to confess 'everything.' I found this to be a horror for me. Especially because you weren't supposed to have your head in the gutter...and because I did...
So yeah, girls and guys did some same sex touching/cuddling/hugging/kissing even, I remember...but no contact with the opp. sex. Lots of guilt, shame, confusion...
Although I have to say that being able to hug another guy w/o shame was a definite plus for me - maybe helped me be less homophobic.
There you go, MGG. "
--- End quote ---
Just to balance things out a bit when I was on 3rd ave at 9 there was no prohibition against hugging the between girls/guys and i don't remember any prohibition on boy / girl relationships once you were an old comer. To be honest I don't exactly remember what the rules were by the time I went to St Rd 84 but I don't remember it being quite as restrictive as what you guys are posting. At nine there was often kisses fo me from the girls. maybe I was excluded because they thought I was too young to worry about. Little did they know. I think those kisses were what made my experience the first time positive as much as anything else. Just being a cute kid made for alot of attention that i needed. Wish it was still that easy.:wink:"
--- End quote ---
In st pete, you couldn't express ANY interest in the opposite sex or you were in for some serious punishment. Even LOOKING at the other side of the isle could get you lambasted and come down on.
Lamby, could it be that when you were 9 you were treated with special care, and that is one reason all those memories are so positive?
Hell, I can't hardly remember anything that happened to me when I was 9, at least not in any way other than a general memory.
"
--- End quote ---
I have no doubt that my age was a factor in that first experience. Remember not only was I young but I was the only person anywhere close to my age . So even my personal experience with Art in which he was caring even gentle with me were surely at least in part due to my age.
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