New-should run but can't

[Anonymous]

Will pick a name minyana.
I spent so many years of my life enamoured with the idea of doing something more higher spirited with my life and being convinced if they didn't accept me I was nothing, and basically I was, or not.  What a walk in the park for them! I grew up in a very abusive home that the seed offered perfect refuge from.  They did nothing to repair our home but only added to my rebelion so deserved. My mom spwnt 4,000.00 to get rid of me happily becasue after years of punching my face in I was about to start punching back and she knew it.  1/2 a joint of pot and asta la vista, but then they convinced her, with my help my brother should come too. He ended up running away.  I stayed and she had less control on me then ever did which pissed her off but she was glad to be rid of the responsibility.  Everything was the Seed's fault.  I did great in school....a genius, weekends with seedlings.....perfect.  They left and I followed.  Scrubbing their bathrooms in Fla was a privelage and an honor and sometimes I got to talk to Hank.  He was so hot..what the hell did I know about knowing?  I never suspected anything till Art asked me to watch his house.  I thought I would die with the honor bestowed upon me....maybe I would even be chosen for staff. In my dream of dreams.  I was so in love with all of them...idolized and respected them.  I couldn't ignore the fact that I was told not to read the books on his shelf.............so of course I studdied them!  They were Hitler related and basically books on cults and so forth, his library.  I couldn't help but question what he was doing.
This huge enigma, godlike, man that passed in and out being an icon was somewhat tangible to me for a night.  I was in their house.  I tried to behave but was driven with curiosity.  Entirely loving at the time trust me, but WHY could I not read the books. The frigin books. Lot's of hitler schyche books and physcology books and then it dawned on me that we always had to have permission to take phsycology classes in school.  Does anyone remeber that?  If you did you had to see the staff for special counseling..........I have been up all night!  Bye

[GregFL]

On 2005-05-19 02:12:00, Anonymous wrote:

I couldn't ignore the fact that I was told not to read the books on his shelf.............so of course I studdied them!  They were Hitler related and basically books on cults and so forth, his library.  ....The frigin books. Lot's of hitler schyche books and physcology books and then it dawned on me that we always had to have permission to take phsycology classes in school.

I have heard this before, that Art had a fascination not specifically with Hitler, but with the "Hitler Youth".  To me this is creepy beyond belief.  Now you say he also had books on cults?

This is more evidence he knew what he was doing. I am disquisted as I read your post.

[Antigen]

No shit! Makes things a little simpler for me, though. If he didn't know what he was doing, he could go down in my personal history as a well intended loon who inadvertantly fucked w/ my family on a profound level.

But he knew. That's different. Fuck that old shyster!

Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0345371984/circlofmiamithem' target='_new'> Douglas Adams, _Last Chance to See_

[Anonymous]

Cool your jets folks.  He was not fond of Hitler or Hitler Youths.  I never saw any of those books.

[Anonymous]

i was involved and did watch house have no proof of what the books were about but even in 80' were told not to look at his private collection of books. this was true.

[Anonymous]

I think it was more out of being anal about the books.

[Anonymous]

To tell you the truth he read alot of Science Fiction. This I am positive of.

There may have been one titled "Hitler goes to Mars" and you can read anything into that- that you like. The man foughtin WW2.  I believe Hitler was the enemy.

He may have had his quirks like all of us do, but I never heard anything positive about Hitler.

[cleveland]

I would never fault anyone for reading anything. I may have read a book on Hitler too, that doesn't make me a fan. In fact, I wish Art read more. I don't think he was much of an intellectual, smart though he was, and if he had broader knowledge perhaps he would have learned how to harness the energy the Seed created for more something beyond what it became.

I remember watching the house too, and checking out the books. I think Lybbi liked books on sailing and adventure, Cookie liked fiction. I don't remember anything very heavy. I never saw Art reading a book, though I am sure he did.

[Anonymous]

On 2005-05-19 02:12:00, Anonymous wrote:

Will pick a name minyana.
The frigin books. Lot's of hitler schyche books and physcology books and then it dawned on me that we always had to have permission to take phsycology classes in school.  Does anyone remeber that?  If you did you had to see the staff for special counseling..........I have been up all night!  Bye"

Minyana we were all so well trained never to question that even some wjo read this might not beleive what you saw since as if the fact that you witnessed it is not enough. I beleive you! Please explain why you think you got kicked out. there must have been a reason. To me the biggest sense of Fraud about seed and its dumbo leaders was that they would kick you out for things, such deciding to go to schol, not getting an abortion, deciding to go to a particular church, or simply being having an opinion quite different than the other __ukin' lame brain idiots that sat on those cheap, meaningless stools to be praised by the "inferior dummies" in group.

[Anonymous]

Its only legacy is a bunch of ex-members who either years ago or recently started realizing they  were duped and brainwashed, without the leaders thanking the members on their way out.

[Antigen]

On 2005-05-19 11:40:00, Anonymous wrote:

He may have had his quirks like all of us do, but I never heard anything positive about Hitler.

Actions speak louder than words.

First management had plans and then strategic plans. Now we have vision, and we're only one small step from hallucination.
-- Ansley Throckmorton upon assuming the presidency of Bangor Theological Seminary in Bangor, Main per Information World 8-4-`97

[marshall]

<"then it dawned on me that we always had to have permission to take phsycology classes in school. Does anyone remeber that? If you did you had to see the staff for special counseling..........">

I remember hearing this too. I finished my senior year while at the seed. I'd already taken Psychology class the year before. They should probably have added another rule though. 'No reading books from the school library.' After I was given permission to go back to school, during study hall I would go to the library at Cooper City High (I think that's the name) and read all sorts of books on psychology, philosophy, world religions & science. Funny, but it was while on my program that I first read Carlos Castenada's mescaline-soaked tales of Don Quan. That was probably a big Verbotten.

As I recall, it was this extensive reading that  was a cause of my beginning to question the whole seed ideology. I can see why they encouraged a subtle anti-intellectualism...for the same reasons the soviets and maoists derided the 'stinking intelligentsia'. I can imagine what the effect might have been of reading all of the links that have been posted here relating to mind-control & cults if I had encountered them while on my program. Another rule for any present-day seed; "no unauthorized internet time."

Some have defended the seed's use of mind-control techniques on the grounds that we are brainwashed every time we turn on the TV or read a newspaper or book. There's one big difference. You can change the channel or turn the tv off. You can CHOOSE which papers or books to read or not to read. At the seed, we did't get to choose which raps we would attend or which dogma we wanted to accept and which to reject. We weren't consulted about or allowed to question the content of any of the material we were being force-fed. It was just the opposite. We were repeatedly told that we could not pick and choose.

Thank goodness they didn't think of the no-library rule, I might have made staff.  :lol:

[Stripe]

Simply put, that's my main beef with The Seed.  There was never any personal choice there.  Physically, it was an extremely controlled enviroment.  Psychologically, it was a prison.  Rule, regimen and rhetoric.  One way to think, act, and prosper - all according to some elusive, unidentifed, value scale.

While I didn't spend years in the seed, I did spend a couple of years post-seed with a very abusive man.  The standards imposed upon me to avoid a physical violence, in hindsight, were the same kind abusive techniques used at the seed. Complete emotional evisceration and constant fear about when the "come down" would happen.  Since I wasn't a well person going into the marrige, it's no wonder it the person I chose was so similar to the only other deep emotional experience I had ever had up to that point- the Seed.  

In hindsight,I was a sick puppy, believing I deserved the denegration until one day when I performed my own amature reality test and lo and behold, the problems in my marriage were not all my fault. So, fear drove me to leave, like it drove others to leave the Seed.  In the dark of night, under angry circumstances, etc.  

I don't know of any cases where someone left an abusive realtionship on good terms - that's pretty much an impossibility, isn't it?

I feel such empathy for the people who stayed on there for years, in service to the "higher" good and seeking their own self-enlightment, yet being denegrated and psychologially undermined at every turn.

The mind control and verbal abuse used by Seed people really ended up stealing the days, weeks and years from many member's productive lives.  

[ This Message was edited by: Stripe on 2005-05-30 10:46 ]