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Messages - from dallas

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Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / Nineteen years ago today
« on: November 07, 2002, 03:21:00 PM »
My intake sucked because that very morning my mom had picked me up from another rehab, took me to my grandmother's house (I knew nothing at this point), I hung out there for a little bit, then she tells me I'm going to Straight.  I knew exactly what she was talking about because my cousin was in St.Pete in the 80's.

They load me up in the car - my cousin & his friend on either side of me so I don't run - and off we go.

Lots of stupid questions during the actual intake - girl/girl, girl/animal, give me a break - I hadn't even had sex before.

I was completely honest about my past drinking and minimal drug use - of course they didn't believe me, but I was telling the truth.

One of the crappiest days of my life.

Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / To All Straight Survivors
« on: October 25, 2002, 11:17:00 AM »
I agree with Anon. I was as compliant as I possibly could have been, to the extent that I started losing my sense of reality, doubting my motives constantly, haunted by the possibility that I was FOS in some way. I admitted to things I wasn't even sure if I was guilty of to clear my conscience. I lost all sense of who I was, which affects me to this day.

One of my ex-boyfriends made a comment to me about how he would never have complied - basically saying that I was a dork for going along with everything. I am by nature the type of person that respects authority, trusts those older than me, etc.  At 15 all I knew was that I was scared and wanted to go home - obeying seemed the best route.

I think it is a blessing that I was so naive while I was there that I didn't realize how completely messed up it all was. I was too young to look at the experience objectively at the time, which in some way protected me from feeling as violated as I was.

Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / Dallas in '90 also
« on: October 14, 2002, 05:01:00 PM »
Jeff - did you have a brother in Dallas also?
Carmel - I think I know what apartment host home you're talking about - I'm trying to remember you but it's not coming to me.  One thing I remember about that apartment (near Christmas time I guess) was the mom playing Elvis' "I'll Have A Blue Christmas" one Sunday or something. She was pretty nice compared to the other Host Moms...

Straight, Inc. and Derivatives / Dallas in '90 also
« on: October 11, 2002, 07:15:00 PM »
I was in the Dallas Straight in the Fall of '90.  "Jeff from Houston" - sounds like you were there then...??? Anyone else?

Just found this site the other day. Glad to know everyone else hated it as much as I did. I was only in about 4 months; spent the majority of that on 1st phase. I was a headgamer, which got progressively worse for a while after I left.  It still creeps up on me now and then, but I've learned to recognize it and ignore it, instead of going nuts worrying.

Straight Sucked!

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