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Messages - cindiford79

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Vision Quest / Re: My VQ boot camp experience
« on: January 03, 2012, 11:14:28 PM »
It is not that I believe any of this is trivial. It is just hard for me to accept having worked in a facility that they are all bad. Yes there were some asshole staff at our facility but their was no abuse going on. We were on camera 24/7 and the only thing that did happen in that facility that was listed above was they had a level system. It changed every day on the child's behavior from the previous day but the child's rights were never removed. It was more a way for staff to rate if the child was able to handle community outings or use the computer room. The doors were not locked in our facility and the kids were free to leave at any time day or night, and sometimes they did. Of course these were primarily foster kids so they really had no place to go but the streets most of the time. I just feel that the abuse kids do to themselves and have done to them by peers when they are living a drug addicted, or homeless life is just as harmful as these torturous places. Getting raped or murdered on the streets, or killing yourself on a heroine overdose is still a tragedy. Teens don't think rationally, at least most don't. They have under developed frontal lobes of the brain. It is adults duty, especially parents to protect their kids from themselves as well as others. The things I read on here make me sick and in no way do I believe that it is ever right to abuse someone. There are Programs like Children of the Night who are out helping kids though and those are the types of places I believe in. I will keep reading and learning. Maybe the way I feel will change, we will see.

Vision Quest / Re: My VQ boot camp experience
« on: January 02, 2012, 12:43:06 AM »
concept of thought reform

Anyone who lives in society has undergone "thought reform" in one form or another as society is something created with our minds and pushed on others to accept. There is not natural or real society. Just as their is no agreed upon human reality. If by making your kids mind that is thought reform...pretty silly. What kind of society do you want to create?

Feed Your Head / Re: This wrist hold from New Zealand seems familiar
« on: January 02, 2012, 12:39:19 AM »
So... where are the promised "horror stories?" Curiously, there are none!  

Well I have never experienced these horrors first hand so I would not have them to write unless someone tells me about them. Hence the reason I found this site and have been reading this forum. The articles about the facilities are information provided on their sites not investigations I have personally done on their merit. The hopes for the site is that once I get traffic people who have these horror stories will come post them on the site themselves. I don't want to look like I have a ulterior motive by posting a whole bunch of stories I don't have the facts about. I will post news stories if I find them. I am only one person and the site is just being built. It is far from being complete.

I read a lot of complaining about the problems on this forum but no one seems to say much about solutions. So what are parents supposed to do if they have a teen who is killing themselves by drinking and doing drugs, or who is abusing their families or others. Those teens that are really a danger to themselves and others? It seems just as irresponsible for the parents to do nothing. Are you saying that having the kid put into the legal system because their parent has done nothing to stop the behavior before it has escalated is a better solution. I sense the appalled gasps for my site and its content but I don't hear any useful information. I hear a lot about what parents shouldn't do for sure. Do you have children? Or is this a forum filled with angry young adults who feel they were wronged as children? I don't feel anyone should be abused, I am appalled by the stories I have read here but I think there needs to be some actual realistic solutions along with your horror stories and warnings.

Feed Your Head / Re: This wrist hold from New Zealand seems familiar
« on: January 01, 2012, 07:43:23 PM »
Yes it is true I have mostly commercial programs on my site as of now but I am constantly expanding the resources available. Before finding this forum I really hadn't considered how horrible the programs could be because I assumed all have oversight like they do here in Oregon. In Oregon the staff is who get abused at most of these facilities. Of course I have found that even here in Oregon there was a bad wilderness program. So for the most part this forum is opening my eyes a bit. I do however still believe the truth is somewhere in the middle as with most things and not all facilities are horrible and not all kids who get sent away are innocent angels. I have dealt with some pretty horrible humans in children's bodies. Ones that have molested their siblings and stuck objects inside their rectums and ones that have burnt down their house, hurt animals and done all sorts of really awful and horrid things. I do believe that you can be a fabulous parent and have a really awful kid. I also believe that most of the problems faced by parents with their rebellious teens is the parents fault for being a uninformed or uncaring parent.

I will be adding more content on my site as I want it to both hold the good and bad of what is available to parents. I want to have the horror stories and the success stories. I will never take any money from any facility to advertise on my site. Yes I do have some affiliate links from the Total Transformation but I do need to have a way to make up for the tons of hours I spend on the site. By not taking money from any of the resources listed on my site I want it to be a unbiased resource. It is in its infancy so right now it is nothing more than a listing of agencies. I have big plans for it though.

Feed Your Head / Re: This wrist hold from New Zealand seems familiar
« on: December 31, 2011, 03:15:34 PM »
At the facility I work at we are trained to do certain holds but we are only allowed to touch the kids if they are harming themselves, or others or seriously damaging property, like a window. I have worked there for 4 years and never put my hands on a kid. I can't believe how much they charge for those programs. Money is where all the problem comes. If the programs had to be non profit and could only charge a certain amount you wouldn't have all these places emerging that were only about profit and not actually helping kids. I can't believe that there aren't some good facilities out there that actually care about the children and treat them well.

This is very sad. I have family who live in Humboldt County and I actually first saw this video posted on Facebook by one of my Humboldt relatives. Regardless of her age, her parents have every right to be upset and want to find her. Even if she was an adult and left like that, I am sure they would feel the same. I live about 3 hours from Arcata and this whole region of Northern California and Southern Oregon has a very large hippy population so there is a good chance she will find what she is looking for. A lot of homeless teens here as well. I am not quite sure what her being good looking has to do with anything though. So ugly kids deserve to go to programs? Well anyway hope she is found safe and able to provide the closure her family needs.

Vision Quest / Re: My VQ boot camp experience
« on: December 31, 2011, 02:48:44 PM »
Your experience sounds absolutely awful. I can't believe they let adults treat children that way. I work for a facility here in Oregon that is a shelter for foster kids and a juvenile detention. The oversight we have is crazy. If anything our facility is opposite, the kids are allowed to abuse the staff and we have little we can do to keep ourselves safe. In my opinion there is a need for some types of facilities even if these kids are in this position because their parents have failed, they still need a place to be. Adults should never be allowed to abuse the kids though. Thank you for sharing your experience.

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