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Messages - Silent1

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CEDU / Brown Schools and derivatives / clones / RMA 1989 Joe Francis Girls Gone Wild
« on: May 21, 2007, 11:48:40 AM »
there is no proof that this is the same joe francis.

I am sure it is not.

If it is, why has the RMA point not been put on the news. It would make some sort of a headline and in the sick world its all about money.

I went to RMA at the same time as joe, he was a few peers below me. I hated the bastard. He was a false person who just had no clue.

Its a sad story of a rich kid. If it is joe for real, that doesnt matter! He got his money from his dad and made a million. not hard to do when you have money to start with. Is he happy? on the surface i guess? But as a sole, he will forever be lost.


The real winners from the school are the ones who make it in the real world with nothing, they take a bad thing and make it better. I know of one such person. Its not a contest either. These people are not happy. Happiness is a personal thing, so given your same chance, your happiness will no doubt take a diffrent form.

Silent1

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CEDU / Brown Schools and derivatives / clones / News and Goods!
« on: May 08, 2007, 10:42:42 AM »
Even if we are all messed up due to the school, I ask why be so negative.

I am guilty as charged when saying this as well. Thats why I want to turn the frown upside down today and for ever more!

Lets state whats been going well in our lives and support each other.

I saw Spiderman 3 last night and it was good. Lots of good scenes. I really liked it about its play on friendship. I am so much into a strong bond with deep friends.

So far I have great news about my job, I finally was lucky to land a run where I know from day to day what I am doing and have set hours as well. Dont know how long this will last, but I hope to enjoy it as it comes.

The view from my new place in toronto is so amazing, I am surprised I landed the place with the rent I pay. Its only $850 thats not bad with under ground parking too!

Hope you all have a wonderful day!

Dont dwell in the past, there are some things at RMA that made us good people too. Work ethic, commitment, and being self aware. Lets not be angry, you cant change the past. The future is unknown and we can make it.

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CEDU / Brown Schools and derivatives / clones / On a lighter note!
« on: May 02, 2007, 04:50:52 PM »
Have you ever been in a grocery store and heard the RMA music like wind beneath my wings or something?

What do you do?

I smile and think , you have no idea how close I can come to just taking care of myself right now while in the meat section!

Its really true how much that place will always be there forever as they said.

Just a lighter note than all the doom and gloom!

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CEDU / Brown Schools and derivatives / clones / total frustration
« on: April 30, 2007, 01:42:24 AM »
You know I also did realize that I must shed the hipocracy of the place even a year after the school.
I took the year book at graduation and sat by the fire and burned it page by page and watched the flames eat away at the pages of cruelty and hate, It was a good feeling. I actually also did this with the summint and i and me notebooks as well.

I threw the summit key into the forest in whistler one night and said phuck the world! I had done this years ago to move on. However it still haunts me no matter what I do,

I kling to the cedu way as the only knowledge I have. Being a very shy person I also tend not to make new friends easily. This makes it harder knowing why mind games I can play with the situation. Often I seem to over think the situation as well as take it to serious as well.

I have a former grad friend who is gay, this person is still very much afraid to be themselfs with others, I may be the only person who sees them behave in a normal way or rather their most normal fashion. This is very bad on there part, I know you need to act in life and behave according to social patterns. But this person is so afraid and is naturally prone to always being a victim to there own thoughts. Every event is alway looked at in a negative manner.
My so called friend will not even return a phone call after I refused to pay for all the calls anymore, however when I paid they called 5 times per day. Now this person thinks I am nasty and will not call me.
Game and flags galore here!

I think at some point I must also move on and drop the old RMA friends as this person seems to be self distructive as well.

I hope I can meet some new people and become more in tune with the real world, before I become so angry at my life I can no nothing but end it.

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CEDU / Brown Schools and derivatives / clones / total frustration
« on: April 29, 2007, 12:07:43 PM »
I sometimes feel very hopeless and these are the times. Such as now when I am seeing the decite that I was put under at that hell hole.
My values and feelings for others are all wrong, I really have no friends now, that are not RMA related. This is horrible as I use RMA as he guage to determin who a friend is.
Not a single person can live up to it.

I use RMA as a guage of my work as well, the moment I feel taken advantage of I feel like I am going to quit.
I have so far quit over 50 jobs in my life after RMA. All because of the values I was taught to think were right.

I often even have thoughts of suicide and I may at one point go through with it even. I can understand why some people even do this. Its not that crazy. No one can seem to understand the struggle I go through everyday and the utter hoplessness that I feel.

It always comes back to the same thing, and the only way out I see is death. There is no answer that can fix it. RMA cant be the answer nor can anything else.


I am about to quit another job and go to another job and quit that one as well, the cycle can not stop.

I just feel hopless with my life, myself I caused it. RMA is not 100 percent to blame as I control what I do.

 :cry2:

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CEDU / Brown Schools and derivatives / clones / ned murray and fred thompson blew me off
« on: April 27, 2007, 06:27:15 PM »
I attended RMA and graduated 91

I also remember being on a booth or rather a pit restriction as I was the non talker and they made me on a pit to keep me in the middle of things, as well as I had to smush every night and tell my story as well as have someone with me almost all the time.

There was some horrible times there and they just forced it down me.

I still have such as deep bond with that place as to me its the only time I could be myself without compromise as well as having people "care" for me or atleast fake it as I now seem to beleive more and more.

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CEDU / Brown Schools and derivatives / clones / ned murray and fred thompson blew me off
« on: April 26, 2007, 04:02:12 PM »
These idiots are just a few of the post grad memories that I have that make me hate parts of that place.

I met ned while I was working in Whistler and he was with his wife skiing. They came in for lunch, I was the grill cook and we chatted for a few minutes as I needed to get back to work, then we arranged to meet after for drinks, but he just blew me off after we set a time a place to meet. This was a total asshole move.
That just blows the trust I was forced on while I was at RMA.

The same event even happend again with Fred.He called me since he wanted to scam a place to stay for free, I waited for him at a hotel lobby to meet him for over 6 hours and he never showed.

Another RMA staff that pissed me off to no end and I really liked him when I was there.

Also Nicole rowl or Brian rowls wife now, former student with diffrent last name as a student, became a staff member, but she got so FAT and looking like caroline's twin. She would not even talk to me when I last visited the school, since she was so embarrased.


More and more I see the wrong that took place and all the things I trusted and took to hart are all lies and it really now hurts me.
I am no more a person with what I know about RMA now than before.

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CEDU / Brown Schools and derivatives / clones / Looking for peergroup 31 and 32
« on: April 24, 2007, 11:48:02 PM »
I used to know these fellas well. We shared some amazing experiences and some down right horrible times as well.

Nowadays I am a bus driver for Greyhound, nothing amazing, its actually underachiving from my point of view.
I could do better in my job, and am always looking for the next big thing.
I now live in Toronto, Ontario Canada. But most of those who know me, I used to live in Vancouver, BC.

Im the quiet one that never talked in RAPS. Well now I am talking up a storm. I love the tour aspect of the job as I get to be the center of attention when I am doing the guiding part.

I'm still not married and have no real plans for that. Being on my own is what I am and I got that way long before RMA.

Out of the few people I have met, most are allot lke they used to be, just back to a real world life.
For some I am saddened that they dont have the close emotional connection I had with people there and the experience.
I will for all intense say I would go to the end of the world for all my peergroup if they called and asked me too, I also just for the fact trust anyone who went to RMA, a share experience is what makes that a fact, much like going to the army. However even my best friend at RMA does not share my feelings, he now has a wife and kids, thats his main focus. I am not taking that away, rather I miss that in my life too. For all my life, the thing I go back to is RMA. That is the most sugnificant thing I have ever done.

I may not have talked allot but I got the school in more ways then you know. I really understood the message they wanted us to get, its just sad that life in the outside can not exsist like that. You need to be a red, not a green to put it that way.
Any how, I hope this letter finds the right people and we can all catch up again.
The future looks better all the time, atleast I have to hope for that.

special K

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