Fornits

Fornits Home for Wayward Web Fora
An open discussion about the troubled parent industry

I haven't seen a post from him in a long time.  I would expect to see him involved in topics of the past week or so.

To VLA and other parents who have posted here, I, too have a child at HLA.  Lance Henson is my child's counselor in PG79.  The only reason I am not posting my real name, address, and telephone number is not because I want to hide my identity but to protect the identity of my child.  My email address in my profile will tell you who I am.  I didn't go to MSN or Yahoo to make one up for you, so I ask that you respect my child's privacy.

I have refrained from posting previously because I have seen how those who support HLA are treated on this board.  I read the board because it contains information that concerns me, and every legitimate concern raised I have brought to the attention of HLA and have received an acceptable response.  Some of the issues raised do not bother me.

My child has done well in the HLA program.  According to her, the kids there are aware of the lawsuit and do visit this website, and one in her peer group posted in support of his/her treatment there and was castigated for it and accused of being one of Len's sweeties.

Some of you say that you hope the lawsuit is successful in bringing down HLA because you want to stop it from hurting kids (your assertion, not mine).  Others of you want it brought down as a form of vengeance for your having been sent there.  

A lot of you say we're horrible, miserable parents for (a) having children with problems in the first place and (b) putting our children in HLA.  I read a post in another thread where a mother whose son has severe drug problems was advised to just bring him home, stay out of his business, love him unconditionally and without expectation, and he'll come around.  I suspect that mother, just like others of us, has already tried that.  

I don't know if any of you are old enough to have teenaged children yet, but if you are, or if you know somebody who is, the phenomenon of one troubled kid in the midst of siblings who don't have drug, self injury, or sexually acting out problems doesn't seem to be explained by either good or bad parenting.  Most of you will have teenaged children someday, and I wish you the very best.

In any event, I don't know if anybody can comprehend the love for a child until one becomes a parent.  You cannot comprehend not only the fear for his or her safety but also the despair that comes from knowing your child suffers from such intense pain and nothing you have been able to do has made it better.  Parents worry because we know our child has a safety net within the family but  know they're approaching the age when they'll face a world that doesn't know them from Adam, doesn't care, will not tolerate their behavior, and will kick them to the curb when they fall.  

We who love our children would  crawl (and some have) over broken glass for them.  We would give our last dime and our very lives for them.  I don't care than Len makes a profit, we all expect, or at least hope, to make money in exchange for our services.  I have no problem, and take no ethical issue, with paying bonuses and commissions to counselors and edcons.  

Those with the financial wherewithal send their children to places like HLA.  It's the last gift we can give them, but it's their choice what they do with it.  I concede that not every program can be everything to all children, but in the case of my child, HLA has been a Godsend.  

Lance Henson has demonstrated his dedication to my child and to this program, and has assured me he will continue to do so at considerable personal sacrifice, considering the paycuts and additional duties.  I really don't care what he and his wife look like (frankly, I think they look fine) and don't see what their appearance has to do with their competence.  There has been no problem that I've heard of associated with his being married to his co-counselor.

My child is looking forward to graduating the program and high school in May.  Her only worry right now is that this website's prognostications that HLA will close in February might be true.  She wants to finish what she started and graduate from high school with her friends, because that's what the kids at HLA have become to her - just like any other kid in high school.  Her Dad and I reassure her that HLA will not close (at least not in February) but that, regardless, she will finish her high school education and proceed to college, to which she is very much looking forward.

I doubt this will stop the diatribe to follow, but so we can cut through some of the intial speculation:

1)  I am not Len, Lance, or Melanie
2)  My IP address is not in Dahlonega
3)  I don't plan to commit suicide, regardless of how compelling the ensuing suggestion might be
4)  I don't care if you call me a troll (or anything else)
5)  If I never post here again, don't break out the champagne - you haven't run me off

I appreciate the comments of those on this site, and there are few, who have responded respectfully to the posts of others.