Fornits

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An open discussion about the troubled parent industry

The stats for their success/failure would be totally off as many parents, me included, sent cease and desist orders in return for the HLA/Ridge Creek "requests for feedback".

I doubt they have ever released that number to potential clients or current customers.

The day my daughter "graduated", I attended that "graduation" with family members (a family member, who is law enforcement was with us - HLA had played games with the other "parent" and I was afraid I might not actually leave with my daughter in my custody) and made damn sure, I kept all the "faculty", if that's what you want to call them, at bay.

I spoke ONLY to one facualty member who had made an effort to semi-protect my child during the time HLA used my daughter as a pawn in their little game with her father and put her squarely in "harm's way" while in their custody.

Once I had her off that campus and back in the custody of her family, that was the last I ever spoke to any of them except, in writing, to tell HLA/Ridge Creek/Quirk & Quirk, in legal language, to NEVER, under any circumstances have their letterhead come in my mail, ever again.

For those of you who would jumpt to crucify me for allowing all these events to transpire and my dautghter to be in such a predicament, try to imagine a world where you haven't lived all the possibilities and just maybe, things could happen in your life where you were not always in control of all the people around you.

Short point in, the "spin" put on some of these piese of info is sometimes a world away from "reality", whatever that is.........

Discovery is a much more fruitful read than the filing....

If this firm is as awesome as everyone says, when you begin to read the list of docuemnts they request and if you ever get a chance to see some of the documents in response....

Then it is an "Oh My God" - that is where the "case" lies...

here's hoping these guys know what to ask for, get what they ask for, and then get past the "privacy" issues involved in this kind of delicate legal problem of the court wanting to "protect" but HLA saying it won't produce because it is trying to be the "good guys" and "protect"

it gets very tricky and tense, make sure to stay even and not go up and down with it all......

since not all that went there had horrible experiences, then which ones were we?

is it just me, or are their commonalities?

the analyst in me, how many plaintiff families were any time in the course of the treatment period, "single-parent" families?

my belief is that buccalto has "women" issues and used all our "profiles" they put together on our families to "know" who they could most abuse and get away with it

no offense, but those of our families that did not have a nuclear mother and father to team up, but only had another loving person come along that supported during the process, were we at a serious disadvantage in the "game" that was played

just a suspision thAT i WOULD BE CURIOUS IF SOMEONE RAN TO GROUND

so, anytime there is confusion or hurt, obviously, there is a problem - it doesn't matter to blame others for the problem.

there are scores of people here who are hurt by HLA

I would venture to guess that ANYONE associated with HLA and the hurt they caused would probably be "hurtful" to the diaglouge?

just me, but that is my guess - anytime some threat to sue for slander is thrown around publicly, that is "intimidation" - if you are not serious about the threat, don't make it - otherwise, let's all just play like grownups??

Dear Ms. Gray:

This is Lacey's mother.  We do have counsel.  If you have a problem with a member of our family, please let me know personally and I will forward to your counsel, our counsel's information.

Do NOT threaten my daughter again!  She has sufferred enough from all of those associated with your former spouse's employer, Hidden Lake Academy (that means you financially gained from that relationship and therefore are directly associated with that employment).

You should be ashamed of yourself to have the nerve to even be associated with this web site.  Alot of us have sufferred irreperably from the trusting relationship we entered into with this legal entity, HLA.

Although, we cannot go back and regain our trust and innocence that we had before entering into this relationship, at the very least, there is this forum to sooth our "wounds".

It is offensive for the predator and their kin to enter the very therapuetic haven that victims have created for there own safety and healing.

If in fact, as you have stated, that you "care" about the harm done by the organization you were associated with, the most caring action for you is to first, apologize to my daughter and others you have further harmed here and then, move on to places you are welcome.

someone said they didn't get the point??

the point, you exert so much energy to attack the parents!!!

well, the parents are already under attck, that is the point!! if you haven't noticed, parents have NO power anymore.

The media/public school sys/the judicial sys/the psychiatric assc/the counselors/the hospitals/the TBS's are all getting rich and making themselves so IMPORTANT, cause they are HELPING those poor kids (but of course, that is after they took away the parents power over their own children!!! you are going to vote for those wonderful HELPFUL people - RIGHT!!!).....

All the liberal influence, the "touchy, feely, "Village", have taken over to "raise" our kids and "silence" parents!  and NO ONE says anything!!

The public school, from elementary age indoctrinates the children about abuse from adults, not distinguishing from parents or family, just watch out for the abuser!!!

Don't get started on the crap that I support abusers, my life was destroyed by them (no, i don't use that excuse to resign from life, every smile I smile, every hug or kiss I receive in spite of my abusers, is a WIN for me and no, I accept no excuses from anyone for hurting other people, "because I was an abused child", no excuses!!! just do the right thing) and I am convinced the only appropriate form of punishment is that every time an abused person get a PTSD episode from being "harmed", the abuser should get a life threatening illness during that time, to only be relieved from the pain, when the person abused has the episode pass and forgets about it and is able to just enjoy life.

Our judicial system has taken over the raising of our kids (it takes a village? bullshit) they decide about sex education, diversity, sensitivity, everything except reading, writing, and arithemetic!!  so gee, guess what, we are  failing as a country in that area - surprise!!!

Then when a parent needs to parent, the kid comes up with all sorts of crap from school, that is taught against the parents wishes, as to why a parent has NO right to set boundaries or expectations for their child.

The school says "that ok johnnie, you get an "A" for effort.  We'll just lower the expectations or put you in a "special" class and then you'll "feel" better about yourself!!!!!

There is the principal the asst, prin, the teachrs, coaches, parents on the blessed PTA (panrent teacher assc) that are so much greater in number anymore than the parent/or parents, that it is a LOST battle.

When the parent says, no I expect more from you then that, gee, where do you think the little tyke turns to to "feel" better, NOT the parent!!

Then you wonder why it is sooo attractive to send a kid to wilderness??  Those of us in our 50's, we WORKED from the time we were kids and it didn't matter how you felt, it mattered, could you survive on your own.

We didn't know about welfare, the "helping" organizations.  We knew how to go get a JOB - but now that is a dirty word isn't it??

We don't do WORK - we leave that to those "illegal immigrants" cause we are much to important for work.

every child deserves a college degree (they can't read or write or think and they certainly don't know how to learn, but we don't want them to "feel" bad, so we won't tell them they are uneducated, we'll give them their degree and ahhhh, they can go to work for, guess who - YEAH!!! the GOVERNMENT!!!!

you all sit in here and bash parents - we are accountable to the school sys for child abuse, school attendence, state of mind to the judicial system, our beliefs that may differ from theirs as then we are "homophobic", "racist", whatever "label" they decide to come up with to "take control" of our children.

Where I went wrong as a parent is when I decided to take away the authority away from the court and not charge my kids dad with abuse.

You want to know law firms, reasearch Williams & Connelly, Belli Jacobs Weil & Jacobs - you think these law firms didn't want to impose JUSTICE, their style?

how dare i not cooperate in the 80's with being a "victim".  my god, how i could have helped the "women's movement" (the immasculation of our young men)  ooopppsss - guess that is not PC either

I decided that, in researching abused women, they repeat this crap over and over and over.  What is the recidivism rate?  You wouldn't believe it!

The only way to stop is to go through the pain of change and the only way to go through the change is actually to do it, not to get an "award" from the court for sitting up on the witness stand and piling humiliation on top of the humiliation you have already sufferred to "tell the court" and then be at their mercy as to whether they "believe you.

As if my reality as to what happened depends on whether I am believed - rubbash!!!

So, the point, the reason Bill Gates and many states and religious communities and decent parents are pouring their energy into "alternative" or private schools is that the raising of our children is for parents, not any school, not the govt, not some committe!!!

now you all can sit around here all you want, "JUDGING" parents story as to what you believe or not, who is a TROLL (for god's sake, who in god's name has the time for THAT!!) or not, but unless you get out there and STOP all these people interfering in the parents RIGHT to raise their kids, you are simply sitting herre amusing yourself cause you got nothing better to do.....

my grandkids will go to public school over my dead body - lacey wants to be a teacher, IN A PRIVATE SCHOOL!!!!

what's the point, well, hopefully, NOW - you get it!!

if not, oh well...... too bad for you!!

have a good life - go DO something to change kids being available for TBS's in the first place - put them out of business cause parents are parenting and DON"T NEED then anyway!!!

On 2006-05-01 12:20:00, Anonymous wrote:

"Nobody said anything about "sexual relationships." Are you saying Lacey can't have a BOYFRIEND without being sexually involved with the guy?"

so, who ever was kind enough to defend this wonderful person, my daughter, thank you, but not only does lacey have her own caring kind, bruiser of a boyfriend to protect her, her senior law enforcement, "some-day-to-be" stepdad, who doesn't really "do" the "shrink" stuff, but went to evry "parent" workshop he could and participated, believes more in the "baton" type of therapy and kindly always protects us all - so those of you that had any untoward thoughts, etc., go bother yourself......  all this had to do was contributing some of our family experiences to help others gain a "different" perspective.....

but most of you are a closed minded sort of people I never......

well, thank you for the intelligent, but kind and caring folks, keep on searching and guiding the others that need you, we too busy picking the lillacs and hmmmm, enjoying them.....    :razz:

the question for a parent is:

do you listen to your child's school (DHHS)(in our case, they are trying to prevent being liable/responsible for the child going from a top performer to not being able to perform at all and them having to pay the bill for their responsibility of the child's "civil right to an education" at their expense?

do you listen to the psychiatrist, who keeps coming up with more complicated diagnosis/hospitilizations, "quiet rooms" that totally destroy the child's sense of any power?

do you listen to the insurance company, whose "case manager" want to dimish the problem to limit their liability and recommends 30 days here, 10 days there, 5 days here,  then another 30 days here with the "revolving door" syndrome repeated over and over?

do you listen to the child's private therapist who is convincing you that 2 - 3 times a week would be better for the child's "getting more quickly through this phase of challenging development", but instead of any progress, you just get deeper and deeper down that black hole?

do you listen to the recovery people who advocate "tough love" and just lock your child out of your home to get some normalcy back and keep your friends?

do you listen to the child that tells you to let them decide to go and just live the way they want to with "friends"?

my experience with the ed con was, this was the first experience with one entity interacting with all the various "agencies" who became involved and was able to organize all the "data" from each agency and make reccommondations for various TBS's around the country that were options to choose from, both by the parent and the child

no matter what the choice (and ours had a very positive outcome) it is excrutiatingly painful to be seperated from your child and the guilt of the time of seperation, never goes away (we still are making up for the lost time every day)