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Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform => CEDU / Brown Schools and derivatives / clones => Topic started by: Tinkerbell on October 06, 2004, 03:16:00 PM

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: Tinkerbell on October 06, 2004, 03:16:00 PM

Ha! i found my portfolio today and i read it and i saw in all my restrictions the words Plumb and Square haha! what the fuck i never understood how the based everything around those two stupid words! The restriction says i have to keep myself  and area plumb and square (dish crews, dorm space, and work crew.) I was on bans from smiling, laughing, singing, humming, drawing, doodling, tagging,and i had to eat at least two meals with staff. Just to let everyone know i never had an eating disorder so that one really made no sense.  Just want to open it up for discussion so everyone could share their story.

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: vvigil on October 06, 2004, 03:46:00 PM

I did have an eating disorder. Thing was, I was anorexic, not bulimic, but I was constantly being accused of throwing up. Someone was throwing up, just not me. Whatever. But they really didn't have a clue there.

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: CEDU IS A CULT on October 06, 2004, 04:01:00 PM

Damn Vicki!  I remember when everyone thought that was you throwing up in the bathrooms. They gave you so much shit for that.  I'm sorry you had to go through that.  Then, when the person who was doing it copped, we were all shocked!!  It was an older student remember her (not naming names)?  One of my good friends there, and she was on a table when I graduated so I couldn't even really say goodbye.

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: vvigil on October 06, 2004, 05:59:00 PM

No one ever told me someone copped to it! No one ever told anyone in my peer group or those below me! Everyone believed it was me until the day I graduated! Now that you say it though I can probably guess who it was. Ran into her a couple of times after cedu around the valley here (San Fernando Valley). ARGH.
That's part of cedu's thing- they don't care who did it as long as someone is an easy target. Lets make an example out of the easiest person to pin stuff on. Such mindgames for everyone. When I tell people about the stuff that went on there they don't believe me. They think I'm making it up. Then those who do know about cedu and their methods can't believe I'm alive to talk about it. I try not to dwell in it, but this PTSD crap really lives on.

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: Antigen on October 06, 2004, 06:35:00 PM

Can you describe a CEDU portfolio? Sounds a lot like a Seed moral inventory.

There are a bunch of moral inventories posted to The Seed forum. These were mandatory after about the third day. Good little graduates were supposed to keep doing them even after graduation. I even know some people who did for awhile. Newcomer MIs were read by their oldcomer and anyone's MI could be read by their parents and/or staff.

Anyone care to write up a comparison?

What was done with the seed saved from the India Hemp last summer? It ought, all of it, to have been sewn again; that not only a stock of seed sufficient for my own purposes might have been raised, but to have disseminated the seed to others; as it is more valuable than the common Hemp.
George Washington, Writings of Washington, Vol. 35, pg. 72

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: Anonymous on October 06, 2004, 09:10:00 PM

When I was at CEDU, we had portfolios and had to chart our "progress" and justify our admission into the next phase.  The phases were: Vision, Quest, Challenge, New Horizons and Source.  The latter two phases were the upper levels of Ceduified bullshit artists.

The Portfolios contained writing assignments, journals, wilderness experiences (assignments)and other glorifications of CEDU with all that it "teaches" you.  You were to shed the skin of your past and adopt the cloak of cultist values.   To do that, you had to write about what worthless scum you were prior to the CEDU experience and how you are seeing the light or whatever.

But we didn't have to sing Zippity Do Da and Kumbaya like you Straightlings did... Just endless rotations of Neil Diamond ("Turn on Your HIghlight") and Whitney Houston's "I Believe the CHildren Are the Future."  The Police were allowed once a week.

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: Anonymous on October 06, 2004, 11:45:00 PM

I meant "Turn on Your Heart Light"... Not "High Light" or Head Lights."

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: CEDU IS A CULT on October 07, 2004, 10:12:00 AM

Vicki, the person who copped, her first name started with an "S" and she was from Michigan, but had family in CA I think.  No, they would never admit they had wronged you, but you were wronged and if anything- I know it.  I'm sorry you had to go through all of that.

Title: REDACTED
Post by: blownawaytheidahoway on October 07, 2004, 10:37:00 AM

Ok.
say Bye- bye

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: vvigil on October 07, 2004, 10:37:00 AM

That's just sad that someone finally copped to it. I'm over what happened to me now in terms of the throwing up stuff- now it's just an even funnier story. Even more representative of the mindgames from that miserable place.

I can really believe some of the other stuff people are talking about. It's representative of cedu. Again, why are we all surprised at these stories?[ This Message was edited by: vvigil on 2004-10-07 07:51 ]

Title: REDACTED
Post by: blownawaytheidahoway on October 07, 2004, 10:42:00 AM

FUCK CEDU. Fuck Cedu's spinoffs. Curs!

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: shanlea on October 07, 2004, 10:46:00 AM

Holy shit, Blown. That just fries my ass and that is exactly why I hate those phony witch hunters.  I hope your parents now know what you went through and feel some sense of horror about it all.  

These are the kinds of stories that make me feel that the perps should be confronted by the adults we now are... to be faced with the bullshit they perpetrated on minors who could not defend themselves.  

I'm sorry you went through it... There is nothing worse than being accused of something you didn't do and then facing the consequences for it. I hope the guy who made these allegations feels like absolute cow dung. Did the truth ever come out?

Title: REDACTED
Post by: blownawaytheidahoway on October 07, 2004, 11:09:00 AM

FOOLS! "A plague upon your eppileptic visages"

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: Tinkerbell on October 08, 2004, 05:16:00 AM

Damn that crazy blown....hey i know this is totally off topic but i never graduated so i had like post Bca agreements to graduates have to do that to or is it just the people that get pulled?

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: blownawaytheidahoway on October 08, 2004, 08:44:00 AM

I want to respond better to above post, but I really didn't understand the question.
Can you repeat it a tad more clearly?

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: Tinkerbell on October 08, 2004, 11:55:00 AM

lol..sorry i was out of it. When u graduated did u have to do post-bca agreements? Cuz i got pulled and i had to do post-bca agreements and i was wondering if graduates had to do them, as well. I hope this is clearer i am still pretty out of it.

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: blownawaytheidahoway on October 08, 2004, 02:24:00 PM

I suppose I was in a position that I kinda had to. yeah. actually now that I think about it, the program does encourage those that will be back with their families/parents to have agreements, but it's not a big deal at all. As for agreements with yourself...at that point it's just program mumbo jumbo because you can't expect what the world will throw at you after having NO control over your own life until that time. It doesn't even matter because any enforcement if needed would be impossible after RMA. I wanted to get along as best as possible with my folks as I had to attend high school again. That was kind of unusual in itself at the time I was interred. We had a lot of struggles since I left the program but I now see that they are mostly or at least very often involving CEDU related/created issues.
What are all of your experiences with having to return to "real world schools".
And college?

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: Tinkerbell on October 09, 2004, 12:03:00 AM

THANX! Umm my experiences well my mom was still the same she bsed me the whole time i was at bca same with my dad..by the way there divorced.so finally after a while i moved in with my grandparents and my older brother. Umm at BCA i had good friends but i never really trusted anyone and i was very sneaky sketchy w/e u want to call it.it was my defense mechanism to not get caught doing anythign wrong u never know when ure closest friend that held all ure dirt is gonna turn there back on u and "Cop out" so when i went to highschool like people never understood why i was always paronoid and sneaking around school do to stuff. But after a while i guess u get the hang of it i mean my hugest struggle would have to be going home and my family not trusting me at all and treating me like i was 5 cuz of BCA saying that i was probably gonna go crazy and that they were crazy for pulling me and shit. Typical! they made me do the post BCA agreements and then my brother told me that after i made them when my team was talking to my mom they told her to disregard all the agreements that she had just made w/me and to not trust me at all. How bout u i know u struggled but like anything paticular that stands out?

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: Anonymous on October 09, 2004, 07:14:00 PM

Thank you for sharing the stories of being accused for things that you did not do.  I was placed on a full-time [or was it a table restriction] until I admitted that I stole something that I never stole.  

I think that after a few weeks of not being able to talk to anyone, doing these miserable work details, and being screamed at in raps I relented and admitted to doing something that I did not. I wish I could have held out longer.

What fucking bullshit!

I was a child that needed a home, and love.  I was a child molested by adults in past.   I was a child that when I outed the adults in my life, money paved the way to incarcerate me.   I was a powerless child left to the whims of the adults in my life.

All I have to say is ?shame on you cedu staffers?, for not stepping up to the plate and helping the children that you were hired to serve. And to the other adults that present themselves as placing a child in this small piece of hell as a way to save a child.   I am sure that if there is a hell, there is a very special place for you.

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: blownawaytheidahoway on October 11, 2004, 10:01:00 AM

In Wordsworth's Prelude, in a lot of things that Orwell wrote about, Freud, many great essayists like Mark Twain all agree that childhood is a nightmare where you are guilty of something until you start to grow up. Born into sin. The idea that you are accused of something you didn't do or don't understand or something unnamed is a part of growing up. When it becomes part of a process of mind control the effects are bad. The long term goal of keeping you broken down and unable to think for yourself takes a lot of energy and no precision. Anything that would make someone feel bad about themselves was said. Often in the meanes way possible. The gangbang that ensued with all levels of students encouraged to play along only created more paranoia within the program's closed up community. People you thought were still "normal" weren't. Then it was you. Raps were so lame. And so very necessary to create the pecking order described here. Raps were the glue that made all the other aspects of the program gel. Nothing was safe in a rap though they always went out of their way to make you think that that was the case. Nothing was sacred. Something you may or may not have said a year ago under extreme duress (physical and mental) would be used as ammunition against you. Really out of the blue. Sometimes people would just say you did something because they confused you with another student, but you couldn't deny it. That sucked too. Also the staff treated eachother similarly though the most vulgar lies and exchanges were reserved for struggling students.
mofo's.

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: CEDU IS A CULT on October 11, 2004, 01:48:00 PM

Check out Kafka's "The Trial."

Title: REDACTED (blow it out your ass)
Post by: blownawaytheidahoway on May 27, 2005, 08:52:00 AM

Quote

On 2004-10-07 07:37:00, blownawaytheidahoway wrote:


"Ok. This will be hard.


Being accused of something you didn't do at a place like this can be VERY stunting.


Not being believed for telling the truth and being punished for not admitting to something false (copping out) is so low.





It happened to me: I was accused of carrying on a homosexual relationship or something of that sort based on the false testimonial from someone who will not remain nameless very long.



<

I take the risk my identity will be exposed for this thread and its contents for redemption! For long awaited closure. Justice, honor and TRUTH. For someone to say " damn, I remember that! After ALL that! Shit, that sucks for you". I reveal these painful memories so someone can say " I remember that feeling, I know how you feel". And maybe they even do a little bit...

   

    And so, I've never had fulfilled the ancient code of JUSTICE which allows me to face my accuser.

Until now.

HERE I AM.

     So, that's why

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: Anonymous on May 27, 2005, 01:32:00 PM

Good for you, Blown.  Takes alot of courage to face certain demons from the past.  I am usually against naming names, but you have every right in this case to name her.  If she has any honor at all, she will take responsibility for her lies and cowardice, and step forward to publicly apologize.  I'm not sure I follow how you determined that there is evidence that she is around here, but I hope that she is, so she can set things straight for both of you.  If she has any integrity, she should feel shame and remorse over her actions years ago.

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: blownawaytheidahoway on May 27, 2005, 08:56:00 PM

That's what I think.
If she wasn't here before, I'll bet one of her little sisters has made contact. I would if someone was talking shit about me or one one of mine.

Believe it or not, it actually feels good to have gotten that off my chest. I don't feel, however, the same emotional response to this person as I do to the "facilitators" of certain raps during this time. I still think Bruce IS...bad. My experience.

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: Anonymous on June 19, 2005, 08:11:00 PM

yeah, i had to deal with the same shit for 3 weeks, because i found something that some one lost, but i held out, only after dealing with all the intaragating from those fucks, they tryed to play games with my head and once the place shut down the person that stole the dam thing coped out. now aint that a real bitch.
 o ya PS. fuck cedu :smile:

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: Anonymous on June 19, 2005, 08:21:00 PM

WELL I DONT HAVE MUCH TO SAY BUT I REALY GOTA GET THIS OUT, FUCK MOON, FUCK SKIP, I DIDNT DO IT AND I THINK BOTH OF YOU HAVE SMALL DICKS AND LIKE TO LOOK AT EACH OTHER NAKED IN MIRRORS, AND I BET EVERYONE THOUGHT I WAS GONA DO SHITY OUTSIDE OF CEDU, BUT HEY I WORK AT CHUCKEY CHEESE AND AM DOING VERY WELL(THAT MEANS IM GETING PAID MORE $ THAN YOU DID)SO, HA!
O YA PS. TO WHOME EVER IS READING THIS, DRUGS ARE BAD AND PLEASE USE A CONDUM

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: dniceo7 on June 21, 2005, 05:52:00 PM

chucky cheese? mad props to you[ This Message was edited by: dniceo7 on 2005-06-21 14:52 ]

Title: REDACTED
Post by: blownawaytheidahoway on April 11, 2006, 08:52:00 AM

read the book!

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: Troll Control on April 11, 2006, 09:27:00 AM

This is an all too familiar tactic in programs.  The technique is derived from police interrogation tactics.  It's very simple and it goes like this:

You have an idea (no proof, just a gut feeling) that the subject acted in a way inconsistent with the program.  You sit the subject down and begin to forcefully accuse him/her of something FAR WORSE than you suspect he/she had done.  This accusation must be very forceful and convincing for the tactic to yield results.

The subject at first vehemently denies the strident accusation and the interrogator responds with statements like "This is serious and you're going down for it whether you say you did it or not."

After a few rounds of this, hopelessness is induced in the subject and the will to resist ebbs.

Eventually the subject will "cop to" a series of "lesser offenses" (that he/she may or MAY NOT have committed) just to get the interrogation to stop.  Sometimes, if the interrogator is especially effective and the subject particularly weak, the subject will "confess" to the prevaricated accusation even though he/she knows full well that they didn't do it (and so does the interrogator).

This scenario is played and replayed daily in kiddie jails accross the country.

It really is sickening that adults use this kind of power-play on children ill equipped to defend against it.

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: blownawaytheidahoway on April 11, 2006, 09:35:00 AM

yeah. and what really fans my fire is that I was punished for being truthful. mofos.

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: Troll Control on April 11, 2006, 09:41:00 AM

Well, punishment comes whether you cop or not in the program.  They're based on punishment.

They'll even bait you to get you "out of whack" and then punish you for it.

Title: Plumb and square and etc
Post by: Anonymous on April 12, 2006, 12:44:00 PM

They'd punish you for knowing that your friend did something and not snitching on them. But then they'd punish you if you didn't tell your friends that you did something. That was my favorite little trap.