Fornits
Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform => Straight, Inc. and Derivatives => Topic started by: Trekker Jag on September 02, 2004, 12:24:00 PM
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Drug List before Straight:
Pot
Alcohol
Hash
Drug List After Straight:
Pot
Alcohol
Hash
Hash Oil
Kif
Amphetamines
Cocaine (powder and base)
Heroin
LSD
MDMA
Ketamine
PCP
DMT
Psilocybn ('shrooms)
Demorol
Morphine
Dilaudid
Benzodiazapenes ( Xanax, Valium, Halcyon, etc)
Phenobarbitol ( and other barbiturates)
Opium
Khataine
Mild painkillers ( Vicodin, Tylenol 4, Codeine, etc.)
Oxycontin
Placydil
Methaqualone ('ludes)
Methadone
GHB
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For what purpose? ok Ill bite...
Before: Alcohol( that was in my own home, hmm)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After:
not gonna post an oooh ahh look what I ingested list...suffice it to say if it gets you fucked up Ive done it.
(Not listing pot because Im tired of it getting lumped in with other more dnagerous narcotics..the government got u all used to listing pot in with narcotics lets get out of that habit, hmm?)
_________________
http://http://www.infowars.com/index.html
Police State is coming[ This Message was edited by: Scarstruck on 2004-09-03 06:41 ]
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Oh and none of it did me any fucking good.
Drugs like Methamp and heroin took me to new levels of hell and depression I thought reserved for the most vile souls in hell....
The only "substance thats currently illegal" that did me any good was cannabis ....oh and methadone kind of saved my life...more than once.
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On 2004-09-03 06:39:00, Scarstruck wrote
not gonna post an oooh ahh look what I ingested list
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
Damn son. That's most of what you do here. post what a bigger badder drug user you were than the rest of us. :roll: :roll: :roll: Well, that and inane song lyrics. :roll:
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On 2004-09-03 08:21:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
On 2004-09-03 06:39:00, Scarstruck wrote
not gonna post an oooh ahh look what I ingested list
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
Damn son. That's most of what you do here. post what a bigger badder drug user you were than the rest of us. :roll: :roll: :roll: Well, that and inane song lyrics. :roll: "
Fuck off.
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drug list period
pot
crack
alcohol
caffiene
nicotene
heroin (sp?0
cocaine
speed (various kinds)
ecstasy :grin: :grin: :grin:
acid
shrooms
morphine
various prescribe opiates (codiene, etc.)
zoloft
peyote(sp?)
ketamine
and various forms of unkown substances bought at raves that were supposed to be x but who knows....
I don't regret a one of them but maybe alcohol and nicotine. Nicotine cause i cant seem to shake it and alcohol because ive almost killed myself and other people while driving under the influence of it.
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I think this thread is a good idea. It shows how we as ?successful graduates? did after we left our programs. I don't think I would have ever ended up shooting dope if Straight hadn't taught me that if I didn't follow my "program," I'd end up with a needle in my arm. It took me one month after relapsing to start shooting drugs into my arm at the age of 18 years old, and that is not something I will ever feel proud of. However, my experiences have given me an insight, and ability to relate to a broad spectrum of people. I only hope that with my experience, I might be able to help others, and in return, not feel the regret, guilt and shame that I did for so long regarding what I call my ?wasted years.? (My time in Straight falls into that category too.)
In my drug experience, I enjoyed mescaline and mushrooms the most. They didn?t take hold of my life the way heroin did, or fill me with the despair that the labels ?addict? or ?habit? carried with them. Instead, I felt that I gained insight and wisdom, and a certain understanding and innocence. I saw beauty, and even felt the presence and understanding of ancient temples. (That may not make sense, but hey, we?re talking about psychedelics!)
Cool link: http://www.mescaline.com/index.html (http://www.mescaline.com/index.html)
I?m putting a * by all the drugs I believe that I abused.
Drug List before Straight:
Pot
*Alcohol
*Cocaine
MDMA
Drug List after Straight:
Pot
*Alcohol
Hash
*Methamphetamines
*Cocaine (powder and base)
*Heroin
LSD
MDMA
*Ketamine
Psilocybin
*Demorol
Morphine
*Benzodiazapenes ( Xanax, Valium, Halcyon, etc)
*Phenobarbitol
Opium
*Mild painkillers ( Vicodin, Tylenol 4, Codeine, etc.)
*Methadone
Present Day:
I'm addicted to espresso, coffee, chocolate, and have been known to partake in the occasional sweet leaf treat.
You know, if Mama Cass Elliot would have shared that damn sandwich
with Karen Carpenter, they would both still be alive today!!!!!!!
--chongo
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Pre-program:
Pot
Alcohol
Post-program:
Alcohol (but waited 11 years AFTER I graduated to take a drink - it was wine at age 25)
Program (LIFE) worked for me
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You obviously NEVER even had a problem... :roll:
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I completely agree. You never had a problem in the first place. Looks like you were a normal teen.......oooooooo, can't have that!!!!!!!
I honestly believe that, if left to my own "devices", I would have ended up MUCH better off than being put in THAT place!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
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Oh, to the contrary
I did have a problem. Lousy attitude, skippin' school, sneaking out of the house overnight, lying, stealing, forging, failing school ... 28 shots of vodka one day when I skipped school.
If this is NORMAL behavior, I don't want to be normal.
I did not experience any abuse in the program, only direction, support and long-term friends I still have today.
I know I differ than most of you, but face it. Not everyone experiences the same things. Sorry you didn't have a better experience.
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28 shots?? At 14?? That would have killed you...
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On 2004-09-04 10:27:00, Anonymous wrote:
"28 shots?? At 14?? That would have killed you..."
well I was actually 16... impressing the friends with how much I could drink...
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As scary as it is, that IS normal behavior for a teen. They're all going to rebel in some way and most of them are going to screw around with drugs or alcohol at some point. It's part of the process of breaking away, finding their own autonomy. Parents need to take an interest FROM THE START. Not just send their kids off somewhere to be fixed when the kids behavior gets too out of hand.
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On 2004-09-04 14:24:00, Anonymous wrote:
"As scary as it is, that IS normal behavior for a teen. They're all going to rebel in some way and most of them are going to screw around with drugs or alcohol at some point. It's part of the process of breaking away, finding their own autonomy. Parents need to take an interest FROM THE START. Not just send their kids off somewhere to be fixed when the kids behavior gets too out of hand."
I think this is normal behavior for teenagers responding to abnormal behavior in adults. One of the core philosophies of the TOUGHLOVE hategroup is that any recreational use of psychotropic drugs is a fatal disease. This simply isn't true and most of us know it. So drug use is practically a perfect way to tweak the old farts w/o taking a lot of real risk.
I think kids would probably be a whole lot less fascinated w/ binging and drugging if the adults wouldn't make such a big deal about it.
When elephants ? ght, it is the grass that suffers.
Kikuyu proverb
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Oh sure...
And I'm sure that the parents of 5 teens/early 20's kids that DIED a couple weeks ago from a "drug cocktail" in central FL. are SO gald they didn't over-react and DO something to help their kids (who felt they needed drugs to get through life).
AT what point would you go to "whatever it takes" methods to help YOUR OWN children? I'm sure that STRAIGHT was not your parents FIRST attempt to address your "normal" behavior as a teen.
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You're mistaken. My parents were sold on the Program, hook line and sinker, for nearly 10 years before they angled me into Straight.
Those kids who died from street drugs would not have had street drugs if it were not for these abstinance freaks who insist that the black market is worth the cost of making them feel all glowing about doing something about what they have decided is the root of all evil.
In other words, if drugs were legal and given only the attention they warrant (like alcohol) we wouldn't have street drugs (i.e. bathtub gin), drug gangs (Al Capone), gang violence (Valentines Day massacre)
That's why I care so much about this issue. It's got nothing to do w/ what happened to my family 20 years ago. That's water under the bridge, and a personal matter at that. It's that these sadistic lunatics are causing a whole lot of problems that effect me and mine. And I don't want their help! I've had all the help I can stand, thanks, really! Just do me a favor. Quit helping so damned much?
Patient memoirs are a kind of protest literature like slave narratives or witness testimonies.
G.A.Hornstein
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On 2004-09-04 14:24:00, Anonymous wrote:
Parents need to take an interest FROM THE START. Not just send their kids off somewhere to be fixed when the kids behavior gets too out of hand.
I think parents also need to turn the Ad Council's advice upside down and not draw a line in the sand. Kids rebel against what we tell them we want them to do. Part of good parenting is having the guts to say "Ok, try it your way", the wisdom to know when and the integrity to suck it up when it turns out the kid was right and you were wrong.
Everything that people say to you is personal. Whether it is constructive criticism or not will determine whether it cam from and asshole or not.
----Bill Warbis
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Okay, so drug list before
Pot
Acid
X
Freeon
Scotchguard
liquid paper (questionable)
After
Pot
Acid
X
"inhalants"
uppers
downers
crack
cocaine (these three aall lumped together cause I had a doubt)
pcp
crystal
I would also like to amend the topic to say drug list after intake.
The most fundamental fact about the ideas of the political left is that they do not work. Therefore we should not be surprised to find the left concentrated in institutions where ideas do not have to work in order to survive.
--Thomas Sowell
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OK, Before:
Alcohol
Mary-Wanna
Hash (shouldn't that just fall under pot?) :grin:
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:smile:
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On 2004-09-04 13:48:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
On 2004-09-04 10:27:00, Anonymous wrote:
"28 shots?? At 14?? That would have killed you..."
well I was actually 16... impressing the friends with how much I could drink..."
What else did you "exaggerate"? C'mon, GET HONEST!
You're an idiot if you think you were helped by the program you attended. Quit buying into their brainwashing bullshit.
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On 2004-09-03 08:21:00, Anonymous wrote:
"
On 2004-09-03 06:39:00, Scarstruck wrote
not gonna post an oooh ahh look what I ingested list
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
Damn son. That's most of what you do here. post what a bigger badder drug user you were than the rest of us. :roll: :roll: :roll: Well, that and inane song lyrics. :roll: "
Hmm I havent posted anything about my drug use in 6 months or more and when I did it was for a reason, I wont be judged by an anon coward.Im sorry if my stories made you feel like you were a fake AA addict. Dont cha have a meeting to go to?
Oh, and anything I post or say is of utmost importance and hardly innane. You are just one of the many "profane" zombies that cannot comprehend my purpose.
_________________
http://http://www.infowars.com/index.html
Police State is coming [ This Message was edited by: Scarstruck on 2004-09-07 09:30 ][ This Message was edited by: Scarstruck on 2004-09-07 09:36 ]
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"Abnnormal" behavior before straight
occassional school skipping
experimentation with pot
experimentation with alcohol
premarital sex(once)
rebellious attitude
"Normal" behavior after straight
all or none thinking/acting
hyper vulnerability covered by invulnerability
isolation/inability to trust
Inability to trust professional caregivers-Doctors, dentists, counselors, therapists
emotional shutdown/numbness-emotions are overwhelming
high tolerance for physical/emotional pain
Inability to recognize inappropriate behavior of self or others
disocciative episodes
compulsive behaviors( working,drinking,eating,shopping, sex)that attempted to overcome feelings of powerlessness, anxiety, fear and anger.
depression
and I'm one of the "successful" graduates.
Anon it sounds like you weren't on the same straight diet of pb&j, humiliation & brainwashing that some of us were. Same kool-aid though.
p.s. you've had enough.
How about a song!
Who's next? Come on! Motivate! Who REALLY wants to talk!
Get off your lazy ASSES!
::bangin::
On 2004-09-03 18:42:00, Anonymous wrote:
"Oh, to the contrary
I did have a problem. Lousy attitude, skippin' school, sneaking out of the house overnight, lying, stealing, forging, failing school ... 28 shots of vodka one day when I skipped school.
If this is NORMAL behavior, I don't want to be normal.
I did not experience any abuse in the program, only direction, support and long-term friends I still have today.
I know I differ than most of you, but face it. Not everyone experiences the same things. Sorry you didn't have a better experience."
::bangin:: What is ominous is the ease with which some people go from saying that
they don't like something to saying that the government should forbid it. When you go down that road, don't expect freedom to survive very long.
--Thomas Sowell
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nope
Wasn't in STRAIGHT, but a program that was a "take off" - so must have been minus the abuse and bs. We used the steps, similar rules, phases, etc. I choose get something out of the experience and make it work for me. Sorry if that makes you all uptight and angry.
I did not have all the post-program trauma many of you claim to have had. I went on to finish school, work, enjoyed my young adulthood without the need for drugs, alcohol or other vices, no run-in's with the law, married at 31 and have children now... work, involved in my community, and have returned to school.
Was made aware of this site by an old friend who found it, trying to locate other old friends from the program we were in.
WOW. Much different programs.
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So many of us didn't, it's nice to hear when someone did not feel abused, and/or neglected. :smile:
What program were you in, Anonymous?To the extent that a society limits its government to policing functions which curb the individuals who engage in aggressive and criminal actions, and conducts its economic affairs on the basis of free and willing exchange, to that extent domestic peace prevails. When a society departs from this norm, its governing class begins, in effect, to make war upon the rest of the nation. A situation is created in which everyone is victimized by everyone else under the fiction of each living at the expense of all.
--Edmund A. Opitz
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On 2004-09-07 19:37:00, whiterabbit wrote:
"Abnnormal" behavior before straight
occassional school skipping
experimentation with pot
experimentation with alcohol
premarital sex(once)
rebellious attitude
"Normal" behavior after straight
all or none thinking/acting
hyper vulnerability covered by invulnerability
isolation/inability to trust
Inability to trust professional caregivers-Doctors, dentists, counselors, therapists
emotional shutdown/numbness-emotions are overwhelming
high tolerance for physical/emotional pain
Inability to recognize inappropriate behavior of self or others
disocciative episodes
compulsive behaviors( working,drinking,eating,shopping, sex)that attempted to overcome feelings of powerlessness, anxiety, fear and anger.
depression
and I'm one of the "successful" graduates.
Anon it sounds like you weren't on the same straight diet of pb&j, humiliation & brainwashing that some of us were. Same kool-aid though.
p.s. you've had enough.
How about a song!
Who's next? Come on! Motivate! Who REALLY wants to talk!
Get off your lazy ASSES!
::bangin::
p>"
Damn good post, whiterabbit.
_________________
"Mean and hateful since 1982"
Your sponsor says it's OK for you to drink[ This Message was edited by: RTP2003 on 2004-09-08 09:04 ]
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On 2004-09-05 06:07:00, Carmel wrote:
"Okay, so drug list before
Pot
Acid
X
Freeon
Scotchguard
liquid paper (questionable)
After
Pot
Acid
X
"inhalants"
uppers
downers
crack
cocaine (these three aall lumped together cause I had a doubt)
pcp
crystal
I would also like to amend the topic to say drug list after intake.
Oh no did they get onto you about liquid paper? (I was in Dallas too) I think I got yelled at to admit that I was addicted to inhaling liquid paper every day for probably 2 months. I will never forget that. It just went on and on and on. I had never done it, but by the time I got out I wasn't so sure. They also were trying to get me to admit that I was addicted to cocaine and that my father sexually abused me, neither one had happened either. But for some reason they really focused on liquid paper, it seems so ridiculous now. [ This Message was edited by: jane on 2004-09-08 11:03 ]
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You can freebase liquid paper. It's great-- it gets you really high. Put a few grains of salt and some hydrogen peroxide in the bottle, then microwave it for about 20 seconds. Then you can brush it on the inside of a pipe (glass works best) and inhale the vapors. You get an incredible rush and you stay high for a couple of minutes-- kind of like nitrous oxide, but without the headaches.
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I just huffed the best paint in the world. :silly:
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you are an ass for sure you garbage head.
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Hey, LIFE was just like straight...came from the same source. Helen was a bitch in LIFE and straight. I went thru straight, ended up married, college grad; BS and MS degrees. Have a 23 year old son. I am a grandparent. I volunteer in my community; I work at the homeless shelter once a week; I donate money to liberal causes, vote in elections as well. I am able to to do that because I GREW UP. Nothing in straight helped me to get that way and nothing in LIFE got you that way either. I spent time observing at life in my early adulthood, so buddy I know what I'm talking about. You GREW UP too. Had nothing to do with your time at LIFE.
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[ This Message was edited by: Sophie on 2005-09-09 19:58 ]
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On 2004-09-09 13:31:00, Sophie wrote:
in fact the compulsion to use and my last thought of wanting to get high was somewhere between day 50 and 53. I remember being in Basics rap on day 53 realizing I hadn't thought about getting high that morning.
"
That's because you applied your Program! I think you deserve T&R next Open Meeting! Love ya!
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I think its because I didn't smoke pot for 50 or so days in a row and I hadn't gone more than 4 hours without it for...probably...3 years.....
Thanks for the T & R though..
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If i dont smoke pot for more than a couple of days i usually kinda forget about. I dont need it. Its not addictive to me. Now caffiene is a different story........
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You say 'done has saved your life more than once. Well, it has done me a lot of good, also. But, i've had 2 neck surgeries and back problems and have been mainly using it for pain for a few years. Tired of paying $100 a week for no relief, so went to a pain clinic. They want to ween me off and probably put me on oxy 40's or so once i'm weened. The problem is, is that the pain clinic doc is the biggest, dumbest prick (excuse my French, but that best describes this idiot), who thinks he's God and my opinion accounts for nill. He was going to do a block on me Wednesday after they liked to killed me with physical therapy. When he was going out to get it set up, I told him I thought he might need to know something if the block involved steroids. The first words out of his mouth were "I don't need to hear about it." I explained he might want to listen, since I was put on the steroid pack once for something unrelated to my neck, and thought I was going to end up beating my dog or have a bad case of road rage. My famiy doc explained they have that effect on some, and never wrote anymore. Well, I explained to this pain doc that if it was a different dose, steroid, etc., explain it to me and maybe i'd be OK with it. He rushed out the door and yelled at his RN to "Cancel the block, my patient can't handle it." He then came back in and explained I would probably have no ill effects since it was about one tenth the dose I was given before, and would only be going to one area, my neck. I then said, "Well if that's the case, I trust you, you can proceed." NOOOOOO!!!! Not now. I could be sued if something went wrong and you killed someone or something. I told him I would sign a release, but still, NO! Why could he not have explained this before,when I asked (about the dose levels, etc.), I don't know. He then said, "Your going to have a rough time now with the weening now that you can't handle the block." He really rubbed it in. Now, I have absolutely no confidence in this guy, and if I quit the 'done clinic now like he says I must and we have a fallling out, i'm screwed. Long story short, what's the easiest way to ween myself off and just see a regular doc, (I know one who has no problem treating pain, with compassion, with the appropriate drugs needed for my level 8-9 pain levels.) This guy even went so far as to say smoking is not addictive, and once when I missed my dose and started getting withdrawel symptoms after about 36 hours, "That was impossible." "Can't happen." What method did you use to ween off comfortably with as little witdrawals as possible. Would you mind sharing it with me? Now, i'd just as soon do it slow myself, and then just see the other doc. And i've not even said all the smart ass remarks he had stored up for me. Any advise? I'd really, really appreciate it. Thanks.
charliedog43@aol.com
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Before Straight:
Pot
Alcohol
Inhalents
Over-The-Counters
Cocaine - but didn't know I was doing it, smoked a joint laced with coke.
After Straight:
Pot
Alcohol
Inhalents
Over-The-Counters
Nitrous Oxide
Prescriptions
LSD
Ecstacy
Cocaine
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What is this block you are referring to ? Are you talking about a naltrexone induced abstinence syndrome(Withdrawls)/Bupe treatments?
Yes I wouldnt want to be strung out on opiates for pain relief either.
Im not going to get into personal details but suffice it to say I will be on MMT for life.
Glad you made it off and are ok though.
Methadone isnt an issue as far as hindering me anymore. IM only at the clinic about 4 minutes once a month ..I pay, piss and pick up my bottles.
Sure Im strung out on it...but its just become like insulin or something..its a medical disease I am taking medicine for.
Either way Im tired of arguing that point to everyone and really just dont care what people think about it. Most people in my daily life dont even know Im on it.
On a side note I am getting student loans and going back to college. I have found a career that my felony arrest 10 years ago,and what medications I am on are my business and not an issue.
As it should be, after all its noones business what medical problems/treatments you have/recieve.
I have learned alot and come a long way mentally in the last three years...Starting a new life in a new place has been wonderful therapy for me, and taken from a negative environment...god I was a miserable fuck 8 months ago....
Ups and Downs..and the world keeps turning.
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"its a medical disease I am taking medicine for"
yeah right, and the people at straight were there to help us too. nice excuse.
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On 2004-10-01 05:32:00, Anonymous wrote:
""its a medical disease I am taking medicine for"
yeah right, and the people at straight were there to help us too. nice excuse.
"
Your ignorance is amazing.
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yah me too, it helps with everything from insomnia to hyper irritability to tension headaches. no prescription necessary.
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Thought I'd revive an old thread......
Before Straight
Alcohol - got drunk once, drank very small
quantities on a FEW isolated occassions
Drug list while in Straight after "Getting Honest"
Alcohol
Liquid Paper - (I think I may have referred to it
as inhalents though)
After Straight
Alcohol
Pot
Rush
LSD
Other Inhalents
Speed
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Before straight:
Weed
alcohol
cocaine (just once)
speed
valium
codeine
opium
tystick (if it was really that)
rush
After straight:
Weed
alcohol
cocaine (just once)
acid
mescaline
robotussin and Vicks 44
Thanks group for helping rid my fears of acid and mescaline pre-straight! :rofl: Some of the best times I ever had in my life were when tripping.
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Ha ha, aspirin was on my drug list from before Straight, which is totally inappropriate, as that was a self-harm suicide type of thing. Here's our suicidal kid, how about we drop her off here to get knocked around some. Ah, the good old days of child abuse.
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It isn't easy being green.
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On 2005-11-10 19:23:00, Str8survivorVA wrote:
Beautiful son and loving husband I do not deserve.
"
No need to kick yourself around like that. I'm sure if you "didn't deserve them", you wouldn't have them. The fact that you have a beautiful son and a loving husband is an indication in and of itself that you are a person who is "good enough" to have or is "worthy" of them.
You have a right to be happy and to see yourself in a positive light. The fact that you recognizre that what Straight did to you was wrong may anger or sadden you----this is actually kind of healthy, in my opinion, because it is indicative of a spark of self-esteem, real self-esteem, not the bullshit they called self-esteem in Straight. Easier said than done, this stuff, but the fact that you are here now, getting some perspective on what happened, what was DONE TO YOU, (which in NO WAY WAS YOUR FAULT OR SOMETHING YOU DESERVED) shows that some part of your authenic self survived the indoctrination process. That is strength. Knowing this, "recovery" (top use a perfectly good word that's meaning has been hijacked by the Stepcult) from Straight IS POSSIBLE. It can be done, through a number of methods, some which may be more appropriate or comfortable for you and your situation. It may not be quick, and it may not be easy, but part of you survived that shit, and if you survived that, you can probably deal with most anything life will throw at you. Good luck.
This is a really sad example of how Straight destroyed fragile teenage self-esteem, telling us we were undeserving of anything good or pleasant because somehow we were flawed, we were "druggies" and this gave them the right to treat us like shit. Kinda flies in the face of their "disease" model of drug use, don't it? Name another "disease" that would warrant the treatment we received. The whole house of Straight is built on a foundation of lies, it's time yoiu stopped believing them, particularly the ones they told you about yourself.
rtp2003
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No one NEEDS to hear shit.
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I sure do.
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On 2005-11-10 21:41:00, Str8survivorVA wrote:
"Thank you, anon. Your words mean mean more than you know. I think, on some level, I am not the only one who needs to hear them. This is why I am posting them on this form...Why are you anon?"
He's not anon. He's RTP! :wave: You'll see some of his posts here. Great guy, what he wrote makes perfect sense. Glad it helped, some of those very same words have helped me too.Not a place upon earth might be so happy as America. Her situation is remote from all the wrangling world, and she has nothing to do but to trade with them.
--Thomas Paine
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Before:
alcohol
aspirin
rubber cement
After:
alcohol
aspirin
rubber cement
pot
speed
LSD
opium
cocaine
mushrooms
morophine
a wide variety of pills
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On 2004-09-03 18:42:00, Anonymous wrote:
"Oh, to the contrary
I did have a problem. Lousy attitude, skippin' school, sneaking out of the house overnight, lying, stealing, forging, failing school ... 28 shots of vodka one day when I skipped school.
If this is NORMAL behavior, I don't want to be normal.
I did not experience any abuse in the program, only direction, support and long-term friends I still have today.
I know I differ than most of you, but face it. Not everyone experiences the same things. Sorry you didn't have a better experience."
Trust me, you'll never get your point across here. Yes, some people actaully did benefit from the program and did not experience or even see the abuses decribed here (not to say they didn't happen). I'm with you.
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I once saw a girl get her arm and nose broken in group by a violent restraint. Simply because she stood up and refused to sit down.
Ill tell you what though....every time I talk about it or relate the story, I experience crushing self doubt about 1)Was it real? and 2)Was it abuse?. That girl is dead now, so I cant ask her.
I think the reality is that it was simply impossible for any single one of us to honestly say we did not witness abuse. Whether or not we can justify what we saw until it ceases to qualify to our minds as abusive, well thats something else entirely.
You can call that a good experience if you like.
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On 2005-11-10 22:00:00, Cayo Hueso wrote:
"
On 2005-11-10 21:41:00, Str8survivorVA wrote:
"Thank you, anon. Your words mean mean more than you know. I think, on some level, I am not the only one who needs to hear them. This is why I am posting them on this form...Why are you anon?"
He's not anon. He's RTP! :smokin:
wha's up ?? :skull: :grin: Peace.
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:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
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Pre-Straight
Pot
*Alcohol
Hash
*Uppers
Downers
Nitous Oxcide
PCP
LSD
Tye Stick
*Glue
Post-Straight
None.
*-Indicates drugs I believe I abused.
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On 2005-11-10 21:59:00, Nonconformistlaw wrote:
"I sure do."
Yeah, me too. Ya' know, until I got pregnant and my mother in law held a shotgun to my head, I refused to marry my husband. Not that I didn't love him or was planning on leaving, just the opposite. Every day that I woke up and he was still there was proof that he wanted to be. I was scared to give that up, or really rock the boat in any way. Seems silly now. Asif having kids is not about the most trying, disruptive thing you can do! LOL
It all worked out, though.The object of persecution is persecution. The object of torture
is torture. The object of power is power. Now do you begin
to understand me?
--O'Brien to Winston Smith
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On 2005-11-15 14:26:00, starry-eyed pirate wrote:
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On 2005-11-10 22:00:00, Cayo Hueso wrote:
"
On 2005-11-10 21:41:00, Str8survivorVA wrote:
"Thank you, anon. Your words mean mean more than you know. I think, on some level, I am not the only one who needs to hear them. This is why I am posting them on this form...Why are you anon?"
He's not anon. He's RTP! :smokin:
wha's up ?? :skull: :grin: Peace."
beautiful!
ep
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On 2005-11-15 06:41:00, Carmel wrote:
"I once saw a girl get her arm and nose broken in group by a violent restraint. Simply because she stood up and refused to sit down.
Ill tell you what though....every time I talk about it or relate the story, I experience crushing self doubt about 1)Was it real? and 2)Was it abuse?. That girl is dead now, so I cant ask her.
I think the reality is that it was simply impossible for any single one of us to honestly say we did not witness abuse. Whether or not we can justify what we saw until it ceases to qualify to our minds as abusive, well thats something else entirely.
You can call that a good experience if you like.
"
Thank you Carmel
ep
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Before Straight:
nicotine
alcohol
pot
hash
shrooms
x (it was fake, but i had to say i did it in group)
lsd
cocaine
meth
After Straight:
nicotine
alcohol
pot
lsd
real x...haha
cocaine
meth
opium
shrooms
choc mesc
Now:
pot....i am not a good drinker, and all other drugs have no place in my life anymore
alcohol had to been one of the worst
:silly:
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i did pot, akahol, butane, lsd, thc, aspirin, pcp, cocaine and barbiturates before straight.
after straight i did pot, akahol, marijuana, and turkey pie.