Fornits
Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform => Elan School => Topic started by: ember on April 05, 2004, 02:54:00 AM
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lovin you all. we weathered the storm and i really have little pity for those who graduated at the expense of the feelings of others. . .
but life goes on, id like to know how you all are doing. i saw kurt kazlauskis a number of times selling veggie burritos on dead tour before jerry garcia died... are you out there somewhere kurt>?
are any of the early nineties creew around?
my name used to be rob pfeiffer. . .not such a long story about why, but you all from the adoption groups might know bits and pieces. . .anyway. i want to hear from all my peers and relationships from that time.
[ This Message was edited by: ember on 2004-04-04 23:56 ]
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You sang "Hey Jude" at karaoke, right?
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Why do you pity the ones who graduated?
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I agree with Marina, because the ones who graduated tended to have better experiences there than let's say the problem people who would be there for about three years and not get any higher than department head or ramrod or something like that. And many people who graduated were at least helped somewhat from the experience, so it wasn't a total waste.
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Hey Jordan,
I hope that wasn't adressed to me. I asked one question, didn't make a statement out of it, and I don't agree with the anon above either.
And you're right, Jordo, lots of graduates and "staff's favourites" didn't make it, while others that were labeled as "problem kids"have succeeded. I did graduate but barely. I'm happy I did and I don't want anyone to take pity on me for it, but at the same time I don't think that makes me any better than the ones who never made it pass dept head. That's fucking bullshit.
I'm not gonna mention names but I know lots of ppl that are pretty damn successful besides the fact they never graduated the program (I figure you'd pretty much guess your name is included) and we both know that unfortunatelly that diploma didn't keep a lot of grads from going to jail and fucking up real bad.
Peace!
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yeah, i think so. i can sound a bit like paul mcartney, at least i thought so once upon a time. . .were you there for that?
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just a reply . i didnt say i pity graduates, only graduates who graduated at the expense of others' feelings. yes i saw a few and was actually convinced that they gave a crap until a few weeks after they graduated they went back to the streets or whatever dark alley they came from. truly a philosophy of "act as if. . ." is complete bull! i failed at elan because i wouldnt scream and cuss in encounter groups. im just not an angry person, still to this day i transform anger into forgiveness and try to understand why people act the way they do, not blindly lashing out and degrading and humiliating others.so what i say stands. i think it is quite shameful to assume material or social gain at the expense of others. elan just contributes to the evils of society as we know it today. based not on values but apearrance. that place is no better than a sweatshop! in fact i think it is potentially very psychologically damaging, especially to someone who might already be prone to violent or abusive behavior.
peace unto you
benjamin
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Rob/Benjamin,
Yeah, I was there for that. I was the kid from 8 who sang the same song in December '93. I also sang "Don't Be Cruel" by Elvis and "Under the Bridge" by the Chili Peppers.
I know what you're saying about people who graduated at the expense of other's feelings. There were truly some people with whom I went through the program that were complete assholes. And I was shocked awhile back when I found out how many of my peers were in prison and how some were just screwing up so badly.
However, what I've found is that a lot of the kids just needed to get out of their teenage years. Some kids who went to Elan had problems no greater than an average teenager.
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That is so fucking true!!!!!!
A lot of the kidz that go there all they really need is to grow out of there teenage years. Then they realize the values of life. Elan thinks that every teenager needs to think like an adult.
So Fuck Elan
and anyone who
thinks otherwise!
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By the way, Rob, I was cleaning Elan One the day you came in and signed out. I didn't know what was going on with you, but you had a huge smile on your face, so I figured you might be leaving! Later, I heard you'd left. Man, was I jealous!
Like Mandy and others, I stayed past my 18th birthday to preserve my relationship with my family. My mom turned on the tears when I wanted to sign out and I didn't want to hurt her anymore. I don't regret graduating Elan but I wonder what kind of path my life would have taken if I left on my 18th birthday.
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Interesting you mentioned it, I brought up to sign out and I was told NO. They said that If I signed out, I'd be an illegal alien and by law, I could only sign out If I came back to Brazil straight away. After I graduated, I've lived in the States with a student visa and I've been told by authorities that I'd have 6 months to leave the country If I got out of school as long as my visa was up to date, which it was as a matter of fact. Fucked up, isn't it?
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so what becomes of the crazy amount of money spent by families of elan students? when i was there, the grounds were shabby and our "school" was a doublewide trailer!
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when i put in for a request to sign self out when i turned 18,, i was given a talking to, by jeffrey and other residents,saying that the reason i couldnt was becouse of warrents outstanding in the state of north carolina,, they even had sum sort of paper..i had never been to north carolina,,,when i confronted them after it was over,,{ we were in a tight house, reacting was a no no}i pointed out another mistake on paper proving it wasnt me,,wrong social sec # i thunk,i was told i was wrong sumhow , but they would look into it. next thing i kno the hammer comes down on me.s/d and primals,, i asked again later but never got an answer.of course i was private funding,, those extra 8 months{18 total, }added up to a pretty penny to say the least. o ya,, i signed self out later when jim lehman tried to pull my privs as full coord of exp.thinkin back is prolly only time ciggerettes actually saved someone money :silly: lol
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There was this one kid, Ken, who had a prison boot camp sentence hanging over him after Elan no matter what. He said, "Fuck it, I'm getting it over with now" and tried to sign out. For some reason, he decided to stay at the last minute after being a complete prick to everyone but Clare GMed him anyway. I don't blame him for wanting to sign out.
They used to say, "Be grateful you're in Elan and not a hospital." I used to think, "Why? A hospital's better than this place! There's not as many rules, it's nicer and you leave sooner."
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dont forget the free drugs :lol:
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My first year after Elan was very difficult for me, not only 'cause I had to adapt to being back in a regular society, but also 'cause I was all alone in a different country. The point is, for a year or so I got back to doing the same shit I was doing before Elan, that is until my O.D.
After leaving the Emergency room, I was told I had to stay in the hospital for three days for mental evaluation according to the law. I kept thinking to myself "this is gonna be worse than Elan, I better behave". It felt like a summer camp compared to Elan, they let me do whatever I wanted, they let my family and friends stay there after visiting hours and they even gave us free cigarrettes. After two days (not three), they let me out.
I think this is when I decided to change for myself. Throughout all my stay in Elan, there wasn't a single day in which I did not think of drugs. Elan didn't change my mind set about them, and neither did the psychiatrists in the hospital. I changed after life has kicked me in the ass. I changed because I wanted to grow up and no one could take this decision for me.
I ain't no saint, but I'm happy to say I've been away from cocain for 2 and a half years and I have complete control over my life now.
How did you guys do in your first year after Elan? Was it as hard?
Peace!
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huh huh huh huh
you said "hard." :grin: :grin: :grin:
huh huh
Nah, just kidding. I've done some stupid shit since Elan. Fortunately, it's never involved going back to drinking or drugs. Temptations aside, I've been sober for about 10 1/2 years now. I still go to meetings, though not as often as I used to.
Adjusting to the wonderful wide free world was a complete culture shock for me. I didn't know what to do, so I slept three hours a night, used an extensive support system and ate lots of M&Ms! I was a nut for my first three months out. I had no idea how to relate to society. I mean, this thing called the Internet had gone from obscurity to popularity while I was in Elan!
It's always been that support system of good people that's reined me in to this day. In the fall of 2001, I hit a big low, e-mailing a suicide note to my ex-girlfriend, who promptly called the cops to make sure I was OK. It was very humbling to have a cop show up at my workplace. I fell back on my support system and moved out of the hick town that I'd been living in for several months. Everything fell into place. I met my wife less than two months later.
I went through culture shock after Elan. They certainly didn't prepare me and without other treatment, I'm firmly convinced I would have gone back to my old ways.
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Hey Marina,you would have laughed your ass off at Dave Chappelle's "Rick James" bit if you used to have a coke problem.Bet you get some good shit in Brazil.It's a helluva drug.Haven't touched it in 2 years or so.Pretty much a waste of time anyway with the shit you get in N.H.Good luck staying away from it.
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Hey xres, you see Chappelle last night?
"IS WAYNE BRADY GONNA HAVE TO CHOKE A BITCH??!!"
I was laughing my ass off. And Marina, yes, congrats on getting off cocaine. I never used it -- which is fortunate, because knowing me, if I did, I probably would have killed myself with it.[ This Message was edited by: Peter Moore on 2004-04-08 13:59 ]
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I'M WAYNE BRADY BIIIIIOOOOOOOTCH!!
Gave me a whole new perspective on Wayne. I thought he was lame.
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I saw it,man that sh*t was funny.That boulder was huuuuge.
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Thanks guys. It's weird that I used to convince my friends to drive me to DC as late as 5 am to get really bad coke, now If I wanted I could just walk up the closest hill and get the cheap pure coke. Cocaine is just not my thing anymore. I moved on.
Hey Jim, I must admitt I'm not familiar with Dave Chappelle. I'm not sure If we get to watch this show in Brazil. I got cable at my place, in what channel is it on?
Pete, thanks for sharing your story with us. I know how it feels to get to the point where you consider killing yourself, but you know suicide is a very stupid idea, right? Guess you probably heard this many times, I'm not gonna go off preaching cause it's pointless. I'm glad you're happy now. I believe things happen for a reason, Pete. Now you'seem to be successfull as far as your marriage and career, so there you go. If you need someone to talk to, I'm here.
Peace!
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Thanks Marina. Yeah, it was stupid and silly (and really unfair to my ex), but we all got over it pretty quickly.
You lived outside D.C? I lived right outside too -- in Alexandria/Fairfax County, VA for awhile.
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I used to live in Bethesda and my parents lived in Potomac. Do you happen to know Tysons Corner? I used to promote Brazilian parties there at a restaurant/club called Malibu Grill. Have you heard of it?
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Comedy central is the network Marina
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Malibu Grill sounds familiar. I know Tysons Corner well. There is a cool mall there and a lot of interesting stores.
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The nightlife of D.C. was awesome, dude! Adams Morgan on Fridays and Georgetown on Saturdays. The Zei Club and the Insomnia were a good call too, although I'm not much into the club scene, they happened to be the only places that'd remain open til 6 am. Then of course, breakfast at the filthy Dinners in front of the White Flint metro station. Dude, I miss the good times I've had at that place. My brother is heading back to Maryland, that bastard, I'm jealous.