Fornits
Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform => The Troubled Teen Industry => Topic started by: Anonymous on January 03, 2004, 05:23:00 PM
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This question is to Spots and Deberah, maybe it is allready posted somewhere, but I have a question for each of you-
Spots whats the family dynamics of your grandchild? (e.g. Your grandchilds biological parents)
The question applies to Deberah as well, What is the famiily dynamics of your family? Do you have custody of your child?
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Is Spots or Deborah going to answer? Or can some one give a link of where this has been covered? :flame:
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You picked the right emoticon. Take a chill pill. Like most, including yourself, I don't cozy up to just any ol anon and tell them intimate details of my personal life, especially when they aren't relevant to the discussion.
There is a difference between avoiding and ignoring. In case you are confused, I was ignoring you. Can't speak for spots.
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Not trying to be cozy, it would just be helpfull to know where your coming from. Nothing personal either just would like to know who has custody.
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Like Deborah, I give short shrift to Anons. You all know my "log in" (which comes from the fact that we have Spotted Saddle Horses, gaited Tennessee Walking Horses, and Missouri Fox Trotters), as well as my real name. I really don't see a need to respond to someone who is afraid to stand up and be counted, because I am proud to affirm my opposition to WWASPS. However...
Our grandaughter is the oldest child of our oldest daughter (4 daughters). She has always been an important physical presence in our family. She has 3 "aunties" and uncles, several cousins, and is comfortable spending extended periods of time with us.
Other than that, you don't deserve to know anything else, especially since you can't even spell "Deberah"!!! Our family relationship is private, and does not impact my resolve to expose WWASPS for its abusive curriculum. So, we are doing fine, thank you, and the rest is none of your God-damned business. Thank you for asking.
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What you want to do is stick them in a cozy little pigeon hole titled Non Custodial Parent - so you can reinforce your thought reformed notion that its only dysfunctional, non custodial parents who have a problem with the program.
I'm not Spots or Deb, but I'd like you to know, I've been married to the same man (and happily so) for 22 years. We had full custody of our son when we sent him to the program.
We discovered the program wasn't at all what it was supposed to be; and we strongly disapprove.
I maintain we were manipulated and lied to by the program, over and over and to extreme degrees.
I maintain my son was seriously underfed. His health was seriously neglected. He was subjected to painful restraint b/c he asked for a bathroom break while in OP. Lets talk about OP - 12 hours a day, on his knees, face to the wall, hands behind his back. Or, flat on the concrete, face to the floor, hands behind his back - for 12 hours a day. He had three days of this. Some kids gets months of it. Think about that a moment will ya - Months of this.
He had to listen to his friends screaming in pain on many occasions.
All of this, I very deeply resent and regret.
What pigeon hole have you got ready for me?
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To the mom - I'm not the anon that started this thread- aand I can't see the point either. I will ask you why you feel you were lied to and manipulated by "the program?" Is this what your son said to you or you know this for a fact? No accusations, just a question for clarification.
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On 2004-01-03 18:24:00, Anonymous wrote:
"To the mom - I'm not the anon that started this thread- aand I can't see the point either. I will ask you why you feel you were lied to and manipulated by "the program?" Is this what your son said to you or you know this for a fact? No accusations, just a question for clarification. "
OK, like WAY implicit in this "question" is ...how can you believe the little shit? FWIW, we have been astounded at the concurrence of information received from our grandaughter and all the other (literally 100's as opposed to the "1000's" blithely quoted as successful WSWASPSies) kids I have found in the last year+.
It is a sad parent whose first instinct is to accept a statement from his child with disdain, and instead go for the statement of the facility which has incredible fortune to gain by keeping your child until "he's cooked".
I think a pertinent fact to consider is that WWASPS parents tend to distrust their children IN EVERY SINGLE DETAIL, and believe strangers without credentials other than the need to prolong incarceration for money. TELL THEM WHAT THEY WANT TO HEAR, i.e., I was right sending this kid off because I always knew, from birth, that he was a little shit, and IT'S NOT MY FAULT!! Being able to copulate on some breezy romantic night and procreate does not make you a good parent...a parent maybe, but never a good parent. Were you all spawned from such a family yourselves, that you inherently hate, distrust, and condemn your own offspring? Is this the legacy of your own parents? Did they hate you too, and try to set up traps to catch you and force "change" to their personal limited way of thinking? Is your way of "loving" them limited to lock-step following of your own rather hateful program? If you were "lower class", would you beat them up instead of sending them off to let someone else beat them up for money?
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On 2004-01-03 18:10:00, Anonymous wrote:
"What you want to do is stick them in a cozy little pigeon hole titled Non Custodial Parent - so you can reinforce your thought reformed notion that its only dysfunctional, non custodial parents who have a problem with the program.
I'm not Spots or Deb, but I'd like you to know, I've been married to the same man (and happily so) for 22 years. We had full custody of our son when we sent him to the program.
We discovered the program wasn't at all what it was supposed to be; and we strongly disapprove.
I maintain we were manipulated and lied to by the program, over and over and to extreme degrees.
I maintain my son was seriously underfed. His health was seriously neglected. He was subjected to painful restraint b/c he asked for a bathroom break while in OP. Lets talk about OP - 12 hours a day, on his knees, face to the wall, hands behind his back. Or, flat on the concrete, face to the floor, hands behind his back - for 12 hours a day. He had three days of this. Some kids gets months of it. Think about that a moment will ya - Months of this.
He had to listen to his friends screaming in pain on many occasions.
All of this, I very deeply resent and regret.
What pigeon hole have you got ready for me?
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How did you hear of the program? Did you personally visit the program before agreeing to place your son there? How long was your son in the program? What did you do after you concluded he was being maltreated (e.g. take him out and bring him home?) and how is he doing now?
:wave:
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WWASPS helps the whole family, they do not just focus on the child. So the parents can't blame it all on the kid. Let me see a small handfull of real disgruntled parents compared to thousands of satisfied parents. BTW family dynamics do matter, how many parents are mad at a Behavior Modification Program because it is an extension of a custody battel, it really is a good question. I am just wondering why you are avoiding it? Do you have custody?
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I imagine your true interest is in distracting attention from the hard questions posed at this forum-- how kids are treated on a daily basis in WWASP, or any other program for that matter, and whether that treatment is humane and/or violates their rights as human beings in a free society.
[ This Message was edited by: Deborah on 2004-01-03 20:24 ]
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On 2004-01-03 18:24:00, Anonymous wrote:
To the mom - I'm not the anon that started this thread- aand I can't see the point either. I will ask you why you feel you were lied to and manipulated by "the program?" Is this what your son said to you or you know this for a fact? No accusations, just a question for clarification.
How about this. This is what this anon poster's kid said to them. This is also what litterally hundreds of other kids have said. This is what the contracts that the parents sign ask permission to do. You want me to believe what you think is going on inside these programs and to not believe these other hundreds of people. Why? What reason do I have to believe you over these other people?
What they describe is extremely similar to what I saw for two years in another Synanon based coercive persuasion program.
The line separating good and evil passes not through states, nor between classes, nor between political parties either, but right through every human heart.
Alexander Solzhenitsyn
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I have not seen thousands of satisfied parents. I have seen reference to thousands of writing assignments. But I never seem to run into a lot of these people whenever I go out looking for discussion on the topic. And many of those who remain satisfied parents for years have little or no contact with their kids or grandkids after the program. But that doesn't seem to trouble them. They got what they wanted.
You can lead a camel to water but you can't make it stink (any more than it already does)
-- Job
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That probably because you don't have access to their boards. Another thing a lot of people have jobs, resposibilites, families, relationships etc, not the time or know how of hanging out on some anomous bulletin board.
BTW the more active posters have visited this board and others and have moved on to creating postive changes else where.
Many people are dealing with their own issues, and tend to blame everything else except themselves for how their lives have turned out.
Successful people, learn, adjust and move on.
How many parents that enrolled their child into a WWASPS program and are disgruntled are posters on this board, and are not competitors as well, maybe 5 maybe 10 if that.
BTW posters that have never been to a WWASP facility or are Political Activist don't count either.
NICE TRY :wave: :wave: :wave: :wave: :wave: :wave: :wave: :eek: :eek: :eek:
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Spots - your granddaughter did not complete the program. She may have had you not forced the mother to release her or you would continue legal proceedings. You are a bully, which is apparent by your language and your assumptions. I never thought of my son as a "little shit." Not ever! I saw the choices he was making to destroy his life and loved him enough to make a very hard decision. He was not a throwaway child in any way. How dare you assume that loving my son was hurting him - hey, we're not all as perfect as you are. BTW you must be a great mom to your daughter to have alienated her from you. Do you even care how much you have hurt her by taking her own daughter away from her?
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Antigen - very good try on this one - the writing assignments are a very SMALL part of a seminar and it's NOT mandatory. You can bet that many more parents CHOOSE to write those letters and it is NOT a requirement of the kids to write - at all. Like the above ANON said - Good try! Won't fly.
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Anon,
In fairness, Spots is not the first or last grandmother to disagree with the decision to place her grandchild in a behavior mod program. What about David Van Blarigan's grandparents? They didn't believe their grandson (who had no criminal record or history of substance abuse) should have been sent to a behavior modification program, either. My question to program parents is why are friends, relatives, neighbors who have a good relationship with your child viewed as "the enemy"? Some children just don't get along with their parents and rely upon the love and guidance of other family members,siblings, friends and even their teachers to help them cope with problems at home. This is not a bad thing, and in fact, makes a lot more sense than punishing a kid for not living up to the expectations and demands of their parents (or a step parent, as the case may be). Only kids who are a danger to themselves or others, or seriously psychotic should be placed in a highly restrictive (meaning 24 hour supervision)residential treatment facility or hospital, and even then, experts say 90 days is about the standard of time needed to stablize the child. Somehow, there has to be a better way to resolve family issues without creating such disharmony and alienting children from their loved ones and forcing them to grow up in an instituionalized-style program. I'm not talking about WWASPS. There are literally hundreds of programs in the U.S. full of kids that don't really need to be there. At least not in the eyes of others who know these children at least as well (if not better) than their own parents do.
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I fully agree with you on this one! Those are the kids in the minority, though. Why some parents would admit their child to a program if they aren't exhibiting behavior that would warrant this type of care is a question only they can answer. I will say, however, even if they have only "normal" teenage issues, they will still come home with knowledge that some people may never learn. To those kids, they won't be there as long. I don't know about any other programs, but I do know that wwasp schools do not accept psychotic diagnosis. These are good kids making life threatening choices, for the majority.
How I do wish there was a better way, a short 90 day quick fix to this. For the majority of us, at least from those I've known over the years, we all tried counseling, help from family, help from anyone, but it failed. There is no easy answer, or working answer other than what we chose for our families - but if you find one let me know.
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Oh, on the 90 day stabilization - that's only stabilized - what about after the 90 days? Change, true change, takes a lot longer than a mere 90 days.
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On 2004-01-03 21:42:00, Anonymous wrote:
That probably because you don't have access to their boards. Another thing a lot of people have jobs, resposibilites, families, relationships etc, not the time or know how of hanging out on some anomous bulletin board.
Ok, in which one of these private fora do you think we could have this conversation? Let's pick one and just copy and paste the whole thing and count the seconds till it's deleted and I'm banned.Sacred cows make the best hamburger.
Mark Twain
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***There is no easy answer, or working answer other than what we chose for our families - but if you find one let me know.***
http://additudemag.com/ourkids.asp?DEPT ... &SUB_NO=22 (http://additudemag.com/ourkids.asp?DEPT_NO=302&SUB_NO=22)
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"Anon,
In fairness, Spots is not the first or last grandmother to disagree with the decision to place her grandchild in a behavior mod program. What about David Van Blarigan's grandparents? They didn't believe their grandson (who had no criminal record or history of substance abuse) should have been sent to a behavior modification program, either. My question to program parents is why are friends, relatives, neighbors who have a good relationship with your child viewed as "the enemy"? Some children just don't get along with their parents and rely upon the love and guidance of other family members,siblings, friends and even their teachers to help them cope with problems at home. This is not a bad thing, and in fact, makes a lot more sense than punishing a kid for not living up to the expectations and demands of their parents (or a step parent, as the case may be). Only kids who are a danger to themselves or others, or seriously psychotic should be placed in a highly restrictive (meaning 24 hour supervision)residential treatment facility or hospital, and even then, experts say 90 days is about the standard of time needed to stablize the child. Somehow, there has to be a better way to resolve family issues without creating such disharmony and alienting children from their loved ones and forcing them to grow up in an instituionalized-style program. I'm not talking about WWASPS. There are literally hundreds of programs in the U.S. full of kids that don't really need to be there. At least not in the eyes of others who know these children at least as well (if not better) than their own parents do.
Anonymous"
Anon,
While you make some very good points, their are a few problems- (e.g.) The programs get in the middle of a power dispute or custody battle, the programs make contracts with the parents or legal gaurdians. Therefore it is the parents resposbility to place the child. The programs are always and should honor the legal parents or gaurdians wishes.
It is always eaiser looking in from the outside and be judgemental of parenting choices, however their may be more then meets the eye. You may not know of what happens in the home, or if the child has a chemical inbalance or something similar that may stunt their progression. Not all kids in these programs have subtance abuse problems or legal problems. As a matter of fact if they have to sever of problems most smart programs will not even take those kids.
Still parenting rights ultimatley and should belong to the legal parents or gaurdians. If they are incompetent they should get a court order.
All most always the parents know best for their child.
The older you get and the more kids you have, you understand your parents did pretty well, and can become thankful for discipline and rules.
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***There is no easy answer, or working answer other than what we chose for our families - but if you find one let me know.***
http://additudemag.com/ourkids.asp?DEPT ... &SUB_NO=22 (http://additudemag.com/ourkids.asp?DEPT_NO=302&SUB_NO=22)
DOES NOT APPLY-
Sure if a parents is dealing with a difficult teen with ADD/ADHD this could be helpfull.
This is not the typical issue most parents calling in or needing help have. They teens are dealing with a lot more sever problems then ADD/ADHD, their is usally some major charachter problems, that can be compounded with substance abuse, chemical inbalances, the list could go on and on.
Most parents who place their kids are way past that point.
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Notice your response. You asked for an alternative, and whether you choose to see the link I provided as an alternative or not, it is.
It genuinely keeps the family united and results in positive change, and has a higher success rate than RT.
In my opinion, you just left the realm of a parent sharing their experience and entered into the realm of being an expert on why parents incarcerate their teens, why it is absolutely necessary, and their only option. You sound more like a promoter or damage control agent. That's how I choose to perceive you.
Afterall, "happy", "successful" parents have better things to do, right? Only those who have a vested interest in the program would spend their time posting to message boards.
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Deborah what experince do you have working with struggling teens? Any Degrees, any real scientific data that applies, any experience?
My point has been, the alternative does not apply to the majority of people sending their child to a RTC or specialy boarding schools. Your article talks about add/adhd that a teen maybe difficult.
Most parents looking to enroll are way past that, they have allready tried counselling, family members , intervetion, you name it.
I am interested to hear what experince you have.
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You folks appear to be so focused on defending and being right that it interferes with your ability to comprehend and be objective, much less open to more humane options.
The article said:
For example, children in this study also had emotional and behavioral disorders (EBD), conduct disorders and oppositional behaviors that further complicated their AD/HD symptoms. About one-third of the children in the study also had general anxiety, separation anxiety, or depression, or some combination of all three.
***
That pretty much covers the scope of all the minor "disorders" that might land a teen in a warehouse situation. So the kids in these programs are too far gone for this option to work for? Didn't one of you anons state that WWASP doesn't take the seriously "disordered" kids. Who's left?
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On 2004-01-03 23:14:00, Anonymous wrote:
"Oh, on the 90 day stabilization - that's only stabilized - what about after the 90 days? Change, true change, takes a lot longer than a mere 90 days. "
Thank you for your response, Anon. Regarding the question about what happens after a child returns home after 90 days of care and treatment in a residential treatment facility or hospital -- there is no one-size-fits-all treatment modality that can effectively address the **individual**
mental, physical and emotional needs of these children. Or any child, for that matter. But you are right about one thing. Change is a process. Parents who commit their child into a long-term behavior-changing program often do so with the belief that submerging their child in a controlled environment for months, even years, is conducive to change. But do the end results justify the means? Insulating children in an environment where their every thought and action is judged in accordance to the demands and expectations of THE PROGRAM is an extreme method of indoctrination. The values and beliefs imposed upon programmed children are designed to force them into compliance (not acceptance) with an instuitionalized lifestyle. If you don't believe me, take a good look at your parent manual. The instructional guide used by programs to indoctrinate parents with the same values and beliefs your children are being instilled with 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. This process of change can not be called giving your child a "second chance" when in reality, it is slowly but surely robbing them of their individuality. If that is what you believe is right, then something is wrong with your reality testing skills.
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On 2004-01-03 23:46:00, Deborah wrote:
"***There is no easy answer, or working answer other than what we chose for our families - but if you find one let me know.***
http://additudemag.com/ourkids.asp?DEPT ... &SUB_NO=22 (http://additudemag.com/ourkids.asp?DEPT_NO=302&SUB_NO=22)
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And in that same article there is link to: http://additudemag.com/ourkids.asp?DEPT ... &SUB_NO=17 (http://additudemag.com/ourkids.asp?DEPT_NO=302&SUB_NO=17)
Deborah - I really appreciate this link, however, most of it is based on a theory. This would be a great alternative IF the KID buys into it! IF communities offer this! and IF you get a commitment from ALL parties involved.
I get that you assume that parents haven't tried everything they can find first. The majority of them have. The majority are not in conflict with a spouse over treatment options or custody battles. I will do some research in my area and see if this article's options are available and let you all know what I find out.
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The article contained no link to an advertisement. You may have found that page on the website, but not in the article.
The article was not based on theory. It was the results of a STUDY- the practical application of a theory.
You may not find this specific program in your community, but if you ask, you will find a therapist who will work with a family as the article details.
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Deborah - You are missing what I just said. The KID has to buy into any help. Therapy is great if they do, and results will certainly follow. What you may or may not get is that a majority of the kids go to a therapist and play a game, or they refuse to go at all. The parents are willing and open, but if junior refuses, what other alternatives can you suggest?
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Deborah - You are missing what I just said. The KID has to buy into any help.
Are you saying that if the kid does not buy into it then it is ok to force it upon him?
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No, Carey. Forcing therapy on someone is pointless. Giving them an opportunity to do it, is different. A parent may have consequences in place if the child is non-compliant - let the child also choose the consequences - loss of car, tv, computer, something they want to keep. If it doesn't work - in most cases, it won't, then give them some options - in writing, and have them sign it. One of those options could be going to live with grandma, let them know you have been considering sending them to a boarding school. Problem is parents will keep giving chance after chance, and not following through with the consequences. What does that tell them about life and rules in general?
Rebuilding communication, if it's still controllable, is always key. Threats don't work, the teen has to understand there are consequences to skipping school, breaking curfew, or what would be considering "testing the waters."
It can go way beyond normal stuff quickly. ADDers are a high risk behavior personality and self-medicating, running away, unprotected sex, anger don't respond to consequences unless there's consistency and a responsiblity on their part to change their behavior.
If the teen is unwilling to work with a therapist, then I'm saying that more drastic measures may be warranted. Sending them to an overnight juvenile justice center stay, a short term program of some type, or if that doesn't work, a long term treatment center.
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The Question is still out for Spots and Deborah,
Who Has Custody?
It a simple question please answer.
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"No, Carey. Forcing therapy on someone is pointless."-
BINGO! It looks like that settles it.
WWASP is pointless. Anything a kid has to be kidnapped (I mean "escorted") to is coercion. True unconditional love and patience and guiding the child to set their own rules works. It may not be an overnight breakdown of personality, but it will work. If a teen is failing school ask them what they think they should do in order to do better. And they're actually smart enough to figure it out. Help them live by rules that they help make. Read "Coercion and it's Fallout" by Murray Sidman. The part about the mice is very interesting. You can conclude that once the lid is off the maze (programs) and the kids no longer have to deal with the punishment they will always associate the punisher with the punishment (including the parents that sent them there.) They really learn nothing about decision making, or living in loving families. They learn to avoid punishment even if the act they are being punished for was actually life sustaining. They learn to not care about their own desires, just to avoid punishment. It's a scary way to go through life, but hopefully they will eventually meet normal people and have loving relationships and learn about stable, loving families in their lives outside of coercive programs.
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http://www.intervention.com/servsfi.html (http://www.intervention.com/servsfi.html)
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Again, to the ANON poster 2 above this - if the child is not willing to go or to participate in the family therapy at home, intervention may be necessary.
Once a child is safely at the program, it may take months for them to stop resisting and begin healing. How many families have successfully accomplished a child willing to do this at home?
Intervention is crucial to stop the destruction.
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On 2004-01-04 17:13:00, Anonymous wrote:
""No, Carey. Forcing therapy on someone is pointless."-
BINGO! It looks like that settles it.
WWASP is pointless. Anything a kid has to be kidnapped (I mean "escorted") to is coercion. True unconditional love and patience and guiding the child to set their own rules works. It may not be an overnight breakdown of personality, but it will work. If a teen is failing school ask them what they think they should do in order to do better. And they're actually smart enough to figure it out. Help them live by rules that they help make. Read "Coercion and it's Fallout" by Murray Sidman. The part about the mice is very interesting. You can conclude that once the lid is off the maze (programs) and the kids no longer have to deal with the punishment they will always associate the punisher with the punishment (including the parents that sent them there.) They really learn nothing about decision making, or living in loving families. They learn to avoid punishment even if the act they are being punished for was actually life sustaining. They learn to not care about their own desires, just to avoid punishment. It's a scary way to go through life, but hopefully they will eventually meet normal people and have loving relationships and learn about stable, loving families in their lives outside of coercive programs. "
Dont know where you got your information about not learning decision making or living in loving families, but it obviously wasn't concerning a wwasp program!
Ever read "Who Moved My Cheese?" A much better read about "mice."
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On 2004-01-03 21:48:00, Anonymous wrote:
"Antigen - very good try on this one - the writing assignments are a very SMALL part of a seminar and it's NOT mandatory. You can bet that many more parents CHOOSE to write those letters and it is NOT a requirement of the kids to write - at all. Like the above ANON said - Good try! Won't fly."
TASKS Ground Rule #13 - Follow the instructions of the facilitator.
The facilitator assigns homework. In order to keep the ground rules which are agreed to on the first day, homework is mandatory. If homework is not mandatory why are attendees required to turn it in?
You claim that this is a small part of the seminar, yet I am certain that you felt it was overwhelming at the time. My experience is that the attendees always feel there is a very large amount of homework at all of the seminars.
An example of this SMALL part of the seminar:
Discovery Homework, Friday
1. Write a minimum of one page on your experience of yourself during the Red / Black game. Explore your behaviors, your attitudes,your assumptions and your beliefs about yourself and others and connect them with how these are patterns in your life.
2. What was your definition of 'Accountability' before today? What is your definition of 'Accountability' now? If there is a difference between the two, how will this difference impact your life?
3. Identify five significant emotionally upsetting events in your life. Write about what beliefs about yourself or others you either formed or reinforced as a result of those events.
4. Start a journal about your experience of yourself during the first day of Discovery.
Do you recall the facilitator ever asking those who have not completed their homework to stand? Why is this done? What happens next?
Letters of appreciation to our child's program is definitely a homework assignment. I recall this from Discovery (both as an attendee and as a staffer) and from Focus (still have the notes from the focus I staffed that tells me clearly that I am to collect these letters from my group). If you read the letters on wwasp site, most of them state that they have just finished Discovery or Focus. I suppose that is just a coincident that they CHOSE to write those letters at that time.
Judy
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Judy - did you not read that most parents choose to write these types of letters, and don't think it's all in the seminars? It's definitely not. Good try, again, it won't fly.
Why would a person attend a seminar and not turn in homework you so expertly posted? Doesn't it help to put a personal experience on paper? Those that didn't do the homework could be in resistance or think it's not They will get what they were willing to put into it. No judgment on the facilitator's part, they just ask questions to get them to think about the choice they made.
Plenty of parents didn't complete the assignments in many of the seminars I attended or staffed. It is called accountability and it is an eye opener.
Is that a bad thing?
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My post was a response to this:
On 2004-01-03 21:48:00, Anonymous wrote:
"Antigen - very good try on this one - the writing assignments are a very SMALL part of a seminar and it's NOT mandatory. You can bet that many more parents CHOOSE to write those letters and it is NOT a requirement of the kids to write - at all. Like the above ANON said - Good try! Won't fly."
I was simply sharing my experience of the seminars and that I (among others attending with me) considered the homework to be a LARGE, not small, part of the seminar. I also strongly disagree with the statement that homework is NOT mandatory. I backed that up with a little more detail.
My post had nothing to do with whether or not the homework had value. I am aware that "plenty of parents" do not complete their homework. Do you want to confirm that they are then "reminded" that they broke ground rules when they did not complete the mandatory homework?
You and Darlene must have attended Discovery and Focus together. You are the only 2 people I have heard say that a letter to the facility was not part of their homework.
Judy
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Judy - I'm not the same anon here, but I just want to say that I read that he/she agreed that some parents choose to write letters of appreciation in the seminars, but that's not the only time they are written. What's wrong with that? Do they also give them a template or sample letters to use? No, they don't. They say what they do because that's what they feel, I would guess. If you read the letters on the wwasp rebuttal website, you'll see there are many that have had their kids home for a while. When the letters were written is not really important, it's the content that matters.
I personally was never asked to write a letter of appreciation, but it's been a while since I was in a seminar, maybe it's something new. I chose to write a letter of appreciation a couple of years ago after my relative graduated and had been home a while. :wink: