Fornits
Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform => Straight, Inc. and Derivatives => Topic started by: animals all of us on November 09, 2003, 02:38:00 PM
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In Greek the name for my disease is skiurothropy.
Most days I find myself in parks. I wake up in trees with twigs and leaves gathered around me. Somedays I wake with Acorns that I have to pick out of my teeth, and the acorn shells are all around me.
I'd been traveling around for some time in the mists of Ireland old. I found the one shaman woman who could tell me what had happened and why I tick and chirp sometimes when I am on the job (I haven't worked in several years because I haven't met an employer who could let me relocate to a nearby park).
As she put me into a trance I was drawn back to a sunny day at my favorite shadey hangout. I was lazily peering into the trees when a rabid squirrel leapt suddenly across my public bench. The pain I felt in my left arm as the squirrel scratched me became unbearable while the shaman had me hypnotized. I do not remember much and I do not know how the lil', cute motherfucking scratcher squirrel had become rabbid in the first place. In the trance I chased it to a dank hole in a tree. That was the last I saw of the rabbid squirrel.
When the shaman brought me to real awareness I began to have nice flashbacks of visits to the doctor for shots of rabbies. My blood had been tested and the doctor tried to find the horrible scar the mfing r. squirrel made. To our surprise the scar was gone. I got my rabbies shot to be sure.
I paid the shaman five thousand pounds and she tried to give me a rope with a bell on it. Hmm. I declined the offer.
I went home and began to do research on skiurothropy. Haven't found anything to this day. I couldn't turn myself in to the police because I hadn't commited any crimes (yet). For now, I would have to hope for the best and be sure that the parks I transformed in were all too big for me to get out of. Other times I would just lock myself in my apartment and bolt the doors, and windows.
I don't know if I can speak English when I am a squirrel but I am certain it would be neat if I could, mostly I dont' see what's happening when I am a squirrel. My transformation takes place, I have discovered after months of testing, during midday when the sun is most high in the sky.
After several years of this confusing predicament I have found a person who likes cuddly creatures. Although it took me several weeks to approach her and tell her my dark secret, I finally told her.
I could hear her screaming faintly as I turned into a squirrel. She nabbed my large clothes and then she attempted to pick me up as well. Upon grabbing me - I nibbled her forearm and scratched her skin. She liked it. She petted my soft fur and my bushy tail. Unbeknownst to her she would soon be like me; turning into a squirrel with no sense of direction other than to look timelessly cute, being mfing wild and rabbid, and hastily gathering food for the winter while clicking and sqeaking at the other squirrels.
Be careful when you come to my park.