Fornits
Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform => The Troubled Teen Industry => Topic started by: Che Gookin on September 08, 2009, 03:26:59 AM
-
I just got wind of a possible rumor about a girl that walked out of CALO without her shoes about a week ago. Do any of you anons know anything about this?
-
Geeezzz Louise! Where did she go?
-
That my good bear is the question I'd like answered as well.
-
I'd rather it not be answered until after she turns 18.
-
^this... sounds like we'll have about two years to wait if my information is correct.
-
http://www.lakenewsonline.com/camdenton ... ssing-teen (http://www.lakenewsonline.com/camdenton/x2056230508/Parents-search-for-missing-teen)
Just in..
run girl, run!
-
viewtopic.php?f=9&t=27962&p=337701#p337701 (http://fornits.com/phpbb/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=27962&p=337701#p337701)
Theme 3—Do kids have access to phones to call in a complaint about their treatment? Do kids have their phone calls monitored?
Response to theme 3--We do not provide a phone for students to call in complaints. To date, we have been concerned about frivolous use of such a phone and we have not been able to figure out a way around that problem. As for monitoring calls, we do have a staff member in our large conference room where we have 3 or 4 phone calls going on. The staff member is there for safety as those calls can get emotional at times. Teens are not directed to avoid difficult issues on calls or told to keep ANYTHING secret. They are free to complain if they wish. If a staff member did hear that (sometimes they do but not always) s/he will inform the therapist who can then check in with parents. Parents and students are free to escalate concerns to therapists and administration if desired. I have an open-door policy and on occasion students have taken that opportunity and made complaints about program issues. Those conversations have many times been the genesis of course correction within our organization. I implicitly and explicitly invite these conversations. Such a conversation could and has led to an employee termination. We take allegations of treatment that is not in line with our model very seriously. We even go so far as to tell parents and teens how to file a complaint against us if they don’t feel we are dealing with them in good faith. We have that invitation in written materials for teens and parents and on our web site.
-
From the article:
The last time Rose spoke to her daughter was in December. Since then she has not had any contact with Jennifer, only the counselor who works with the teenager. It was the counselor who notified Rose and her husband that Jennifer was missing.
That's disturbing to say the least. From december to Aug 30... That's like 9 months. It would seem to contradict Ken's previous statements (http://http://www.fornits.com/phpbb/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=27962#p337145):
7. CALO does not have a waiting period before a teen can talk to his or her parents on the phone, or see them in person. Relationships are the key to change and we want teenagers to have access to their caregivers from their start in therapy.
That being said he does not explicitly state that phone communication cannot be taken away.
-
I'll quote the article here in full for posterity:
Parents search for missing teen
http://www.lakenewsonline.com/camdenton ... pular=true (http://www.lakenewsonline.com/camdenton/x2056230508/Parents-search-for-missing-teen?popular=true)
Lake of the Ozarks, Mo. —
Joyce L. Miller
http://caloteens.com (http://caloteens.com).
-
Read the comments... very astute whoever the first person who commented is.
-
joyce.miller@lakesunonline.com (http://mailto:joyce.miller@lakesunonline.com)
The likelihood that a 16-year-old teenager who walked away from a residential facility for troubled teens is still in the lake area is slim, but there’s always hope, according to the girl’s mother, Rose Michael.
Hope is about all Rose Michael has these days as she waits for her daughter to be found.
Jennifer Michael, of Elgin, Ill., was last seen on Aug. 30 at the Change Academy of Lake Ozark off Horseshoe Bend Parkway. The teenager has been at the academy for the last 13 months being treated for emotional and behavioral problems.
The last time Rose spoke to her daughter was in December. Since then she has not had any contact with Jennifer, only the counselor who works with the teenager.
It was the counselor who notified Rose and her husband that Jennifer was missing. Jennifer was last seen walking along the road near the academy.
A search of the area by staff and the Camden County Sheriff’s Department turned up nothing to lead authorities to Jennifer.
“We hope that by publicizing her disappearance, someone will contact us who has seen Jennifer,” Rose said. “Every day that she is gone and no one knows where she is, the risk to her health and safety increases.”
The few leads police and a private investigator hired by the family have come across have not been of any help, she said. There is some speculation that a teenager Jennifer got to know while in a diagnostic treatment center in Aspen, Colo., may have helped her in some way, but other than that there’s not even a trail to follow.
It’s like she just vanished, Rose said. She’d like to at least know that her daughter is safe before her 17th birthday on Sept. 19.
Law enforcement officials say Jennifer’s story is typical of runaways.
Most teens have a plan long before leaving, transportation lined out and a destination in mind. Once they are gone, about the only way to find them is if they run into trouble with the law.
Jennifer has been registered with the Missouri Uniform Law Enforcement System and the National Crime Information Center. If she does end up in trouble, her name will trigger an alert that she is a runaway.
Jennifer is described as being between 5-feet-9 and 6 feet, weighing 150 to 170 pounds. She wears braces but takes them on and off.
CALO officials confirmed there was a teenager who had walked away from the facility but declined to verify if it was Jennifer. The staff cited confidentiality between patients, parents and the facility.
Anyone with information or who may have seen Jennifer is asked to contact the Camden County Sheriff’s Department at 573-346-2243 or any other law enforcement agency.
What is CALO?
Change Academy Lake of the Ozarks is program for troubled teens that helps its students build trusting relationships and gain interdependence. The co-ed program utilizes various forms of therapy, including canine, group and recreational therapy.
The program also specializes in helping its members with their academic education by helping students stay caught up during their time at CALO.
Who attends CALO?
Students at CALO are ages 13-17 with either attachment issues, such as identity issues or personality disorders, trauma issues, such as abuse victims, or emotion regulation issues, such as in depression or bipolar disorder.
Students who have a history of psychosis, substance abuse, are actively homicidal or suicidal, pregnant or have a confirmed diagnosis of anti-social or conduct disorder are not accepted.
Information provided by http://caloteens.com (http://caloteens.com).
Loading commenting interface...
Comments (8)
Thank you for the abuse report. We will review the report and take appropriate action.
Loading comments...
APPLES AND ORANGES15 hours ago
Report Abuse
I'm curious. Are the children at CALO not allowed to speak to their parents for over 8 months? Shouldn't therapy involve the family too?
CottenCandy14 hours ago
Report Abuse
Just seems strange to me that the parents would not be involved with their childs issues. I would not go off and leave my child alone with no contact at all. I was not raised that way.
Whether or not the parents are allowed or not allowed to have contact with their child while residing at the CALO is not particullary an issue at this moment. The issue is that there is a teen missing and that the parents would like nothing more than to see their daughter again so please let's not start some irrelevant bashing and stick to the matter at hand. Pass this story on in conversation, social networks and etc. and maybe someone will recognize the name or description of this girl and help bring her home.
mjmetallicalover9 hours ago
Report Abuse
I agree watergrl, this story is to help find this girl and not start picking her or the family apart.
APPLES AND ORANGES7 hours ago
Report Abuse
Excuse me for my opinion, but perhaps if the child had a good connection with her family, she would not be missing in the first place. I am not picking her family apart. I just think it takes a village to raise a child.
ozarkhogsknr6 hours ago
Report Abuse
GET THE MESSAGE OUT,LETS FIND HER.
mjmetallicalover4 hours ago
Report Abuse
K apples, you are excused, buh bye!
greenlantern19692 hours ago
Report AbuseI hope the kid turns up all right.
joyce.miller@lakesunonline.com
-
Even money whoever's posting as Well Proxied didn't even bother proxying.
TrystaAtLakeNews
6 hours ago
Report Abuse
Well Proxied, if you have proof, we would love to hear it. If you even have one child from there who could back it up or would come in with any information, please do so. But we can't make those allegations without substantial evidence. That would be highly irresponsible, as I'm sure you can understand.
Riiiiight, bitch.
Who all wants to bother trying to contact her?
And LOL @ time period. Missing August 30th, they gave her a whole ten days' head start? Jennifer, if they find you now, you fucking FAIL.
-
Someone ought to link that Sum Ting Wong interview with the survivor. Can't remember the thread name, but it's revealing, very revealing.
-
Someone ought to link that Sum Ting Wong interview with the survivor. Can't remember the thread name, but it's revealing, very revealing.
There are a small number of threads it was posted in. If you do a search for "regroup ropes course," you should be able to get them all. ...Assuming I'm thinking of the right interview, of course!
Here's one:
Brief Interview with a CALO survivor..
viewtopic.php?f=9&t=27777 (http://www.fornits.com/phpbb/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=27777)[/list]
-
Howdy,
I second Ginger's statement to investigate further. Absolutely do not take Ken Huey's word for anything he utters out of his toxic lips. He's a businessman and his bottom line is keeping as many of those kids in that program. He'll do what he has to do to make sure they stay there.
Recent insider information shows a huge turnover of students from CALO in the recent months due to some sort of broken promises on the part of the CALO administration. Do a google on Nicole Furg and you'll learn all about the sort of people they have running that place. She used to work at a school called Hidden Lake Academy down in Georgia. A true piece of hell that has scarred the lives of hundreds of young men and women.
Ken Huey used to work at a school named Westridge, which is in the process of being sued. Take a look at this article:
http://www.cafety.org/privately-funded- ... il-22-2005 (http://www.cafety.org/privately-funded-programs/77-mother-files-lawsuit-claims-boarding-school-abused-son-utah-majestic-ranch-april-22-2005)
The truth is a very complicated issue, but when you sift the wheat from the chaff you'll see a pattern. The upper level admins at CALO have moved from other abusive schools to set up their own school. Is CALO abusive?
This is an interview, posted anonymously to protect the interviewer and interviewee, on fornits:
viewtopic.php?f=9&t=27777 (http://www.fornits.com/phpbb/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=27777)
In the end I'm suggesting that you all not take my word for it, not take Ken Hooey's word for it, certainly don't take Nicole Fuglang's word for it either, and take the time to talk to the kids. That massive turn over of students has an entire generation of knowledgable insiders. Even take the time to ask around your own community as I'm sure there are plenty of ex-CALO employees willing to tell you what really is happening in CALO as well.
Oh wait, Ken Hooey is trying to sue them into silence. Go to this website and do a name search on Change Academy and you'll see how Ken Hooey is trying to silence members of your own community.
https://www.courts.mo.gov/casenet/cases/nameSearch.do (https://www.courts.mo.gov/casenet/cases/nameSearch.do)
Don't be shy about asking questions, more questions, and more questions. As for Jennifer I hope your parents have the sense god gave a stump and they are willing to take you home and show you as much love as they can. What sort of school denies or doesn't encourage communication for over nine months when their mission is to reunite familes?
Hello... something stinks.
here's my 50 pence.
Ginger said some good stuff as well. :notworthy:
-
Ginger, your message couldn't have been better expressed. I tried posting my own, less cautious version of a like sentiment, but kept getting error messages. Not sure why that's happening.
Wow. So Ken is trying to sue former employees who report abuse to regulating authorities? So ya' know, the link you posted doesn't work. Maybe post a working one on fornits.
-
Wow. So Ken is trying to sue former employees who report abuse to regulating authorities? So ya' know, the link you posted doesn't work. Maybe post a working one on fornits.
Links for search results aren't valid.
Try this link: https://www.courts.mo.gov/casenet/cases ... hType=name (https://www.courts.mo.gov/casenet/cases/searchCases.do?searchType=name)
- Type in "Change Academy" for business name. Click Find.
- Cases that come up can be accessed by clicking on case number.
- Particulars of case can then be accessed by clicking on tabs across the top of results box (e.g., "Parties and Attorneys," "Docket Entries," "Charges..." etc.).
-
parentsofjennifer4 hours ago
Report AbuseWe are asking everyone to forward this article to as many people as possible, Jennifer could be anywhere by now. We wanted to have contact with Jennifer, but according to her therapist , jennifer was not ready, we did request on numerous occasions that Jennifer at least write to us since she did not want a phone call. We hired dectives to search for her and were in conact with police departments, then we thought we would see what kind of coverage was out there in the area, we found nothing so we notified this newspaper, I wish we thought of it earlier but we just figured it was local news and would be there. Joyce Miller responded immediately and we are so grateful to her. We would so much appreciate any help any of you could give us in spreading this article with her picture to anyone you can. We love our daughter and want her found as soon as possible. As for calo - we will deal with that later.
-
Interesting, hopefully the parents took the time to play a little game of put the pieces of the puzzle together. Maybe this Joyce bird will be sympathetic to an alternative point of view on CALO as well. Be good to have a member of the 5th Estate in the local area on the side of the kids.
-
mom2ferfer18 hours ago
Report Abuse
Jennifer is my neice...my sisters biological child. My sister was a terrible, horrible mother, I'm very sorry to say. My sister had 4 children, and raised none of them. When she DID have contact with them, I wish I could tell you what happened, but I can't. Nobody knows what happened except for my sister, who is now deceased, and the kids. This is such a long, tragic, story - -My sister and John divorced shortly after Jennifer was a year, I believe...she told our family horrible stories to try to turn us against him, but once we all found out the truth, I ultimately testified against my sister to help John and Rose, his new wife, gain full custody of Jennifer, to give her a chance at a decent life. Once my sister lost custody, she never called, wrote or visited Jennifer again. So I guess you can start with abandonment issues...there were times that my sister dropped Jennifer off at my house when Jennifer was 2, 3, and 4 years old, and we wouldn't hear from my sister again for weeks, months....just when we thankfully thought she'd never show up again, she'd pop up and rip her from our home, breaking not only our hearts, but Jennifers as well...I don't know what kind of abuse that Jennifer endured at the hands of my sister, but ANY abuse is horrific. John and Rose sought years and years of counseling, both family, and individual. They would never knowingly put her in harms way...I can say that with absolute certainty. The fact of the matter is - my 16 year old neice is out there somewhere, and for ANYONE to try to pass judgement on them or anyone else is tragic. Put yourself in their shoes for just a moment. And now think one thing - if this was YOUR child, or your neighbors child.....wouldn't you want everyone to just GET THE STORY OUT THERE and save the self righteousness for another time? I would hope so....
Well Proxied6 hours ago
Report Abuse
Although I appreciate your willingness to air your excuse for a family's dirty laundry on a public forum on the Internet, Auntie Evil, I have to remind you that therapy for abuse does not entail more abuse. When a 'therapist' tells you 'she's not ready' to talk to her own parents this is a huge red flag. When a girl is willing to risk cuts, bruises, tetanus, etc just to get away from these people this should be an even bigger red flag.
Then again, John and Rose Michael threw away their chance at being her parents when they threw her away to CALO and God knows how many programs before that.
If you see this girl, turn around. Look the other way. Casually slip her and whatever rescuer she has a $20 for gas money if you have it. You see what these people, and I use the term loosely, are like. Please don't let this girl into their hands again.
Guardian Angel5 hours ago
Report AbuseThis message is directly for John & Rose.
I would urge you one or both, to get this story out on a national level. I seriously doubt Jennifer is in our area any longer. I noticed there was no Amber Alert, no listing with the national center for missing and exploited children....does this mean they do not list runaways, or that she simply hasn't been reported? I'm really glad that Joyce Miller was able to get the word out here...but we need the word out everywhere we can get it out. Please consider utilizing some of the resources I've listed below. I'm sure there are more available to you, those were just the ones that came to my mind off hand.
http://www.ncmec.org/missingkids/servle ... ntry=en_US (http://www.ncmec.org/missingkids/servlet/PublicHomeServlet?LanguageCountry=en_US)
http://www.amw.com/missing_children/resources.cfm (http://www.amw.com/missing_children/resources.cfm)
http://www.cnn.com/CNN/Programs/nancy.grace/ (http://www.cnn.com/CNN/Programs/nancy.grace/)
-
Trystaatlakenews, deleted wellproxied post, has added her own personally instructed the locals to help track down Jennifer before she is "kidnapped."
:wall: :suicide:
http://www.lakenewsonline.com/camdenton ... pular=true (http://www.lakenewsonline.com/camdenton/x2056230508/Parents-search-for-missing-teen?popular=true)
TrystaAtLakeNews4 hours ago
Report Abuse
Well proxied - asking people to ignore this girl, who might very well be in trouble, is irresponsible and I will say on behalf of this paper, that if anyone sees this girl to alert authorities. You must have no idea or imagination as to what can happen to children out on their own in times like these. They are exploited, sold into prostitution, get into drugs, etc.
Anyone with information on Jennifer's whereabouts should contact the local authorities immediately! If you don't, you could be tampering with a police investigation or worse. It is a scary world, one that a 16-year-old is ill-equipped to deal with.
parentsofjennifer4 hours ago
Report Abuse
Guardian Angel thank you for the info., we did report her to ncmec and pollyklaas foundation, we called amw today and they also had the information from ncmec and told us it takes a week to process. we reported her and sent the pictures last Wednesday, it is in their process they said today and may take up to a week. We did sent this article to Nancy Grace also. We have flyers and posters out from Lake Ozark through Kansas City to California. Her aunt is covering the New England states and we have many helping us here in Illinois. Our e-mail with this article is nationwide and we have asked everyone to forward it to everyone they know. Our detective is still working on possible leads. Thank you for the information, if you can think of anything else, we do appreciate it.
TrystaAtLakeNews4 hours ago
Report Abuse
Well-proxied - your comments will be removed if you post any other comments like that. PERIOD. You might believe for whatever personal reasons or vendettas against CALO that they are abusing children. GO TO THE POLICE. But DO NOT tell people on this site to ignore the face of a child who might be kidnapped or in danger.
parentsofjennifer4 hours ago
Report Abuse
TrystaAtLakeNews, Thank you so much !!!!
mom2ferfer3 hours ago
Report AbuseWell-proxied - I cannot believe that you can be so heartless...I hope, for their sake, that you are not a parent, aunt, uncle, whatever...you shouldn't be around kids, because obviously your holier than thou attitude is nothing but hurtful - - -I hope to GOD that you are never put in the position that our family has been put in....and I hope to GOD that you are never in control of so much as a goldfish, because you obviously have no heart. It must be really hard to walk on water and make the blind see again, and lets not forget about healing the lepers.....
-
Eep. Firefox sure garbled that missive beyond comprehension. That's, "Trystaatlakenews, deleted wellproxied post, and has personally instructed the locals to help capture Jennifer before she is "kidnapped." :wall: :suicide:
That's Trystaatlakenews, deleted wellproxied post, has added her own personally instructed the locals to help track down Jennifer before she is "kidnapped."
http://www.lakenewsonline.com/camdenton ... pular=true (http://www.lakenewsonline.com/camdenton/x2056230508/Parents-search-for-missing-teen?popular=true)
TrystaAtLakeNews4 hours ago
Report Abuse
Well proxied - asking people to ignore this girl, who might very well be in trouble, is irresponsible and I will say on behalf of this paper, that if anyone sees this girl to alert authorities. You must have no idea or imagination as to what can happen to children out on their own in times like these. They are exploited, sold into prostitution, get into drugs, etc.
Anyone with information on Jennifer's whereabouts should contact the local authorities immediately! If you don't, you could be tampering with a police investigation or worse. It is a scary world, one that a 16-year-old is ill-equipped to deal with.
parentsofjennifer4 hours ago
Report Abuse
Guardian Angel thank you for the info., we did report her to ncmec and pollyklaas foundation, we called amw today and they also had the information from ncmec and told us it takes a week to process. we reported her and sent the pictures last Wednesday, it is in their process they said today and may take up to a week. We did sent this article to Nancy Grace also. We have flyers and posters out from Lake Ozark through Kansas City to California. Her aunt is covering the New England states and we have many helping us here in Illinois. Our e-mail with this article is nationwide and we have asked everyone to forward it to everyone they know. Our detective is still working on possible leads. Thank you for the information, if you can think of anything else, we do appreciate it.
TrystaAtLakeNews4 hours ago
Report Abuse
Well-proxied - your comments will be removed if you post any other comments like that. PERIOD. You might believe for whatever personal reasons or vendettas against CALO that they are abusing children. GO TO THE POLICE. But DO NOT tell people on this site to ignore the face of a child who might be kidnapped or in danger.
parentsofjennifer4 hours ago
Report Abuse
TrystaAtLakeNews, Thank you so much !!!!
mom2ferfer3 hours ago
Report AbuseWell-proxied - I cannot believe that you can be so heartless...I hope, for their sake, that you are not a parent, aunt, uncle, whatever...you shouldn't be around kids, because obviously your holier than thou attitude is nothing but hurtful - - -I hope to GOD that you are never put in the position that our family has been put in....and I hope to GOD that you are never in control of so much as a goldfish, because you obviously have no heart. It must be really hard to walk on water and make the blind see again, and lets not forget about healing the lepers.....
-
elvis( i meen ) well proxied has left the building ,
heard the muttering somethin about
havin to make kool-aide into some wine fer
some yo-yo's ......... :seg2:
-
Heh, doesn't surprise me they deleted WPs post. Keep in mind here that everyone who I've talked that have met Ken Hooey in person all indicate he's a slick talking sort of fellow. I respect Ginger alot but having learned the stories about this con artist/douchebag from behind the scenes I believe she got taken in by his native charm.
The man, from the reports of it, could probably talk a rattlesnake into giving up its rattles without a fight and convince it later that it enjoyed it. With this in mind I'm not at all shocked by these parents being taken in by CALO. Certainly there is no excuse for sending your child to an abusive program in this day and age with the huge amount of information floating around the internet.
Given CALO is a new program that infomation is not readily avaliable. I really do want to ask the parents what the hell they were thinking, but I'm already pretty sure they are a couple people that got caught up in their fear. I'd love to see this girl make a successful escape, I'd love to see her reunited with her parents, and I'd love to see all of them working out whatever problems she had as a family.
Is that possible?
I have no idea, but I wish the best for all of them. I certainly do hope that Jennifer is safe as can be under the circumstances. Its an ugly world in places and I do hope she is smart enough and street savvy enough to avoid those places.
-
WP? I appreciate your supreme hacks of CALO, but now you're getting the "OH GOD HOW COULD YOU SAY SUCH THINGS" responses. Those are rightfully mine. Get the fuck off my turf.
-
Editor's note: Commenting status for this story has been deactivated due to the derogatory nature of numerous posts.
-
Editor's note: Commenting status for this story has been deactivated due to the derogatory nature of numerous posts.
If people from this website refrained from writing derogatory comments, the commenting status would be active. Well proxied is to blame for this.
-
If people from this website refrained from writing truthful comments, the commenting status would be active. Well proxied can take credit for this.
FTFY
-
Editor's note: Commenting status for this story has been deactivated due to the derogatory nature of numerous posts.
If people from this website refrained from writing derogatory comments, the commenting status would be active. Well proxied is to blame for this.
I think that is a rather harsh judgment. Well-proxied can't be held to task for a local mindset that censors any and all nasty sentiment. IFF that is what it is.
For all we know, the parents may have requested said censoring 'cuz they just didn't want to deal with it. Some folk are kinda fragile like that, and worrying if your kid is okay on top of it all has got to be a pretty full plate, if ya ask me... which I'm sure ya won't... :D
-
Who is well proxied? Well proxied asked people to ignore the girl. I thinks that speaks for his/her character.
-
lakenewsonline.com
Posted Sep 08, 2009 @ 09:13 PM
Last update Sep 14, 2009 @ 02:18 PM
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Lake of the Ozarks, Mo. — Editor's note: Commenting status for this story has been deactivated due to the derogatory nature of numerous posts.
-
lakenewsonline.com
Posted Sep 08, 2009 @ 09:13 PM
Last update Sep 14, 2009 @ 02:18 PM
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Lake of the Ozarks, Mo. — Editor's note: Commenting status for this story has been deactivated due to the derogatory nature of numerous posts made by well proxied.
-
lakenewsonline.com
Posted Sep 08, 2009 @ 09:13 PM
Last update Sep 14, 2009 @ 02:18 PM
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Lake of the Ozarks, Mo. — Editor's note: Commenting status for this story has been deactivated due to the derogatory nature of numerous posts made by well proxied.
OK. What good came out of that? Now people cannot locate her on the victim list (http://http://wiki.fornits.com/index.php?title=Victims) from the link one of our members inserted among the comments.
What about writing a little more polite and show some sympathy for the parents?
Yes, they did place her there but most parents seek help by bribed ed-cons, who made a fool out of them. Then they are mislead and lied to by the staff.
If you have broken a leg, you don't normally second-guess the doctor putting the plaster on. Most people don't know that it is life-saving to second-guess doctors in the mental area.
But that does not make them poor parents.
When ever we see the chance on various message board we enter the adress of the victim list. Parents should be aware when they look for their missing teen that they are not alone. A lot of other families have lost one of their loved ones because they believed in residential treatment.
Thanks for destroying our work.
-
On the upside the fornitswiki has never looked better.
-
Che wrote page 1
http://www.lakenewsonline.com/camdenton (http://www.lakenewsonline.com/camdenton) ... ssing-teen
Just in..
run girl, run!
Run girl, run! Nobody confronted Che on this stupid comment. There are several people who believe his comments are appropriate in a case like this. Che's comment is sad and brings grief upon the girl's parents.
-
This girl is not the only escapee from CALO...there are others.
I learned there is another escapee...a boy this time who ran from CALO during an off-site visit.
Is there any news coverage or searches for that boy?
CG
-
This girl is not the only escapee from CALO...there are others.
I learned there is another escapee...a boy this time who ran from CALO during an off-site visit.
Is there any news coverage or searches for that boy?
CG
It happened in June of this year:
viewtopic.php?f=9&t=27613&p=332710#p332978 (http://www.fornits.com/phpbb/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=27613&p=332710#p332978)
-
Ursus,
From what I gather, CALO knew this kid was going to run and still allowed the off-site visit.
-
Ursus,
From what I gather, CALO knew this kid was going to run and still allowed the off-site visit.
Think they were hoping he'd be off their hands? Was he ... too big a handful for all that "professional" therapy?
Wouldn't be the first time a program has gone that route. From what I recall at Hyde, some kids were outright encouraged to leave by certain staff.
Of course, its probably written in the contract that the parents still owe "tuition" for the contracted period in question, regardless of outcome. And some programs will even sue those parents to get it ... if it hasn't already been prepaid.
-
Ursus,
My sentiments exactly....think there is some liability there....expecially if management comes from facilities where this has occured before....can we tie any of these characters at CALO to this?
CG
-
Can we somehow get ahold of the parents of this kid??
-
I heard kids were jaggin' each other in the ass with baseball bats at this place....wtf??
-
I heard kids were jaggin' each other in the ass with baseball bats at this place....wtf??
I don't know about that, but I do know the kids were shitting in each other's laundry bags, and other gross stuff like that.
-
I heard kids were jaggin' each other in the ass with baseball bats at this place....wtf??
I don't know about that, but I do know the kids were shitting in each other's laundry bags, and other gross stuff like that.
Jesus.....that's really disgusting!!
-
Can we can a name from an official source? The oldest "Missing in Action" record we have on Fornits wiki is from around 1972. A girl ran from Synanon.
We have exchanged info with the Charley project, which is one of many databases over kids who have run away never to be found. We have learned of 3 disapperances from CEDU.
If this kid has not been found we would like to have him listed - not to have him returned to a program but to warn parents. What better warning is there than listing such a name on the same webpage which contains over 60 records of kids who have died in a program?
-
I heard kids were jaggin' each other in the ass with baseball bats at this place....wtf??
I don't know about that, but I do know the kids were shitting in each other's laundry bags, and other gross stuff like that.
Jesus.....that's really disgusting!!
Yeah, no shit!!! My buddy Mikey Rudiman told me what the fuck was going on at that place..this was after he called them, threatening to come up there... Well, turns out he went up there and saw this stuff for himself, and he also found out some of the kids were putting kids' legs between two rocks, trying to break their fuckin legs!!
-
Ursus,
My sentiments exactly....think there is some liability there....expecially if management comes from facilities where this has occured before....can we tie any of these characters at CALO to this?
Can we somehow get ahold of the parents of this kid??
That might be something best left to your attorney's nimble efforts and discretion. ;D
-
Yeah, no shit!!! My buddy Mikey Rudiman told me what the fuck was going on at that place..this was after he called them, threatening to come up there... Well, turns out he went up there and saw this stuff for himself, and he also found out some of the kids were putting kids' legs between two rocks, trying to break their fuckin legs!!
:o
-
Jerry Vancil (http://http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&client=firefox-a&rls=com.ubuntu%3Aen-US%3Aunofficial&hs=nHO&q=%22jerry+vancil%22+straight%2C+inc&aq=f&oq=&aqi=)
-
Jerry Vancil (http://http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&client=firefox-a&rls=com.ubuntu%3Aen-US%3Aunofficial&hs=nHO&q=%22jerry+vancil%22+straight%2C+inc&aq=f&oq=&aqi=)
http://thestraights.com/theprogram/suic ... htm#vancil (http://thestraights.com/theprogram/suicides-page2.htm#vancil)
Jerry Vancil escaped from Straight around 1977 and got to a reporter of the Saint Petersburg Times and told of a beating he had received in a timeout room by numerous old comers. The Times investigated and got statements from several of the alleged old comers who admitted that a confrontation had occurred but not like Jerry Vancil had stated. It was Jerry Vancil who had attempted to beat them all up so they had to protect themselves. State health official from Florida's HRS Robert G. Marshall investigated the matter and publicly stated that if the allegations proved to be true it would become a criminal matter and be given over to the State Attorney's office. And then Jerry Vancil just disappeared. Straight could have been closed down at that time based on Jerry Vancil's story and others beginning to emerge, but the state's star witness just disappeared. Bob Marshall said that without a witness there was no case. The state of Florida did not look for Jerry Vancil and as far as I know Jerry Vancil has never been seen again, dead or alive.
-
That contains the insinuation that Ken Huey may have killed the girl and hid her body.
This insinuation has the potential to be dead-on accurate, as Ken Huey is a sociopath.
-
That contains the insinuation that Ken Huey may have killed the girl and hid her body.
Just because you inferred that doesn’t mean there was any insinuation of that. It may also be interpreted as some hope that (once the girl has reached an age or arrangement where she can be reasonably certain of not being returned to Calo) she will speak out about Calo and follow through on any charges against them. In doing so, she would be doing a lot for the kids that remain in Callow cutody.
This insinuation has the potential to be dead-on accurate, as Ken Huey is a sociopath.
You're probably very right about that.
-
I wasn't trying to insinuate anything. Antigen posted a name. I had no clue what it referred to so I followed the link, found the clip on thestraights.com and pasted it here so others wouldn't have to do the same search.
However anything is possible but I don't think it's likely they had this girl clipped. CALO may be a lot of things but I don't think they have fallen to the mob-like depths straight went to (at least not yet).
-
Any kid escaping a program is reason to celebrate. I have yet to hear from the kid who regrets running from a program.
-
I don't think they have fallen to the mob-like depths straight went to
This is something Che Gookin does not understand.
-
Jerry Vancil (http://http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&client=firefox-a&rls=com.ubuntu%3Aen-US%3Aunofficial&hs=nHO&q=%22jerry+vancil%22+straight%2C+inc&aq=f&oq=&aqi=)
What happened to him? Why wasn't their a search?
Is he on the victims list?
-
Is this article on topix?
might be a good way to get people talking about CALO.
-
I can empathize with this girl and hope she does ok. I ended up in foster care after my dad was put in jail for molesting kids and our mom killed herself. For some reason he never molested any of us so at least he kept it outside of the family. I ran away from foster care after a while and lived on the streets selling produce we picked from peoples fruit trees. It was a rough time but we made it through it and now we have an orange juice business, so it all worked out ok in the end.
-
Jesus dude... that sounds rough.. Do you speak to your dad at all these days?
-
I can empathize with this girl and hope she does ok. I ended up in foster care after my dad was put in jail for molesting kids and our mom killed herself. For some reason he never molested any of us so at least he kept it outside of the family. I ran away from foster care after a while and lived on the streets selling produce we picked from peoples fruit trees. It was a rough time but we made it through it and now we have an orange juice business, so it all worked out ok in the end.
The girl who escaped from CALO is probably living on the streets and people are cheering her on. It is sad, to say the least.
-
To all,
CALO makes it a point to allow teens to "choose" not to have contact and engage their parents.
CALO therapists have made statements that they cannot "MAKE" the children do therapy and talk to their parents. They will actively deny the parents the right to speak to their own children. Last time I checked, the parents have every right to speak to their child in most every state of this union.
Hello???? Why in gods name are they paid for not doing what they were hired to do?
When pushed they cite confidentiality, but guess what, nothing is confidential to the parents of these minors. Even though Ken thinks it is.
Ken, we hope you enjoy your upcoming legal battle. See you in court.
CG
-
Well, while I respect the rights of the children to refuse to speak to the people who put them into the program... it does seem a bit self-defeating in the long run if the goal of the program is to reunite children with their families.
-
That contains the insinuation that Ken Huey may have killed the girl and hid her body.
This insinuation has the potential to be dead-on accurate, as Ken Huey is a sociopath.
No, further up in the thread someone asked about kids who split and were never found. Jerry's name came to mind. I should have quoted that, sorry.
-
Che Gookin,
I agree in some cases but not in the ones where the children are doing something illegal or harmful to themselves or others.
RAD kids are professional manipulators and liars and CALO encourages the kids to be in control in these circumstances. This just adds to the problems.
RAD kids doing the above should never be in control of their parents. If the parents are "abusers" then fine. However, for the "normal" parent who isn't an abuser, then the kids should never be allowed to choose to ignore the ones holding them accountable for their actions. What will happen if this type of Kid hits the streets at 18? Then they will really learn that society or the police don't care about them at all. We are the only ones who truly care. The rest of the world will let them die in a gutter. Just ask CALO if they have helped anyone once the money for their tuition stops. Once the money stops, the trust of care stops and then we know what is what.
CALO does not hold kids accountable, they take the "punishment" out of relationships...what ever that means. That is the doctor spock treatment, it didn't work 30 years ago and it doesn't work now. After all, aren't all his kids in jail? At least that is what I heard.
Also I would like Ken to define for us what an abuser is....and the diffence between discipline and punishment...is it normal discipline, a boot in the ass, yelling, in-your face accountability, or actual real life consequences for certain actions???????? Which is it Ken???
After all, doesn't a football, wrestling or hockey coach do that???? Then again Ken seems to be the home-economics type.
For all the doctors and PHD's out there, i guess that's why it's called "PRACTICING" medicine rather than "PROVIDING" medicine.
CALO is a cash register, performing R&D on our children at thier's and our families expense to further tweak, advertise and gain market control for thier snake-oil, unproven model.
Let's shut them down, hold each and every one of them personally and professionally responsible, get refunds and possibly punative damages and make sure they don't ever get a chance to work with kids again. Let's send them back to Utah where they belong.
CG
-
The ultimate in accountability for a kid in CALO is being in CALO. As for RAD, I think you are going to have a hard time convincing anyone here on fornits, well at least me, that this is indeed a legit medical diagnosis. More than a few of us probably wish they'd take the DSM guide and burn it.
-
Che,
I agree. I don't think RAD is legitimate either. Whether this is RAD, bi-polar, ADHD or green eggs and ham, I can't tell you. I agree that it's a label for something no one really understands at this moment in time. What we do know is the behaviors are very similar, almost identical. I know of families with "RAD" kids who are now adults and their behavior has not changed. Some are currently serving 30 years for molesting their own children. So the abuse goes on, lives are destroyed and no-one is accountable. Even this person will get out of jail, probably in the next 5 years and begin the process again.
As always, when pushed and ultimately cornered, the "professionals" then turn on the parents, start pointing fingers and blame them. Maybe it's true for abusive parents, but what about the ones that don't abuse the children....they get blamed as well. So CALO goes on with their happy lives, all the time being part of the problem and laughing all the way to the bank.
CG
-
RAD kids are professional manipulators and liars and CALO encourages the kids to be in control in these circumstances. This just adds to the problems.
RAD kids doing the above should never be in control of their parents. If the parents are "abusers" then fine. However, for the "normal" parent who isn't an abuser, then the kids should never be allowed to choose to ignore the ones holding them accountable for their actions.
Sounds like the only thing a "reactive attachment disorder" kid does is treat you with exactly as much respect as you deserve.
Given the circumstances under which they grow up- being inculcated with bullshit by people who claim to love them but actually don't give a flying fuck- this is their only logical train of thought. Things might be otherwise if you attempted to teach them anything other than lies, but since this isn't the case you'll see an epidemic of rationality in children, particularly given the pervasive influence of public society that no longer treats any of this as a good thing. The Internet only speeds up the process.
It's the kids who DON'T have some form of this, and people like you, that have the fucking problem.
-
I'm hearing from people who know about the kids at CALOthat the problems really are the parents. Now this isn't a blanket condemnation of all CALO parents either, I'm certain there are those who absolutely this does not apply to.
For those who it does and they are familiar with this recipe,
1) Adopt child.
2) Turn child over to nanny
3) Ignore child for 10 years.
4) Wonder why their own child thinks they are a stranger.
5) Get angry because child is ignoring them.
6) ship the kid to a shrink when the kid starts having problems.
7) program
Now this is very true for some of the parents at CALO. What percentage of of them I have no idea and I won't make a guess either. I'm a strong believer in the saying garbage in, garbage out. It doesn't surprise me that these parents who believe their children are "fashionable accessories" to their life style are finding themselves with a kid who is suffering from all sorts of issues. Being abandoned twice can't be helpful to anyone.
Good news parents, I have it on good account from a lady who adopted a seven year old and struggled with her for a few years that hard work, time, and consistency will pay off if you are willing to put out the effort.
It's not too late to love your children. Bring them home and be a parent to them.
-
Guest,
Well, someone taught them this or produced these effects. But it wasn't me. To che, Yes, it starts with an adoptive child.
Sequence should read, adoped a RAD child already messed up by someone else, pay with your soul trying to help, have the professionals blame you for the damage caused by someone else and risk the security of your natual family. What about those of us that didn't cause these problems that these kids blame because they can't blame the ones who actually hurt them. Should we sacrifice the innocent for the guilty?
How does that fit into the equation?
-
You come off like a heartless dumb ass. If you're adoptive child blames you it is probably because you're compounding the issue (ie: a problem parent)
-
To U Dum Dum,
How many RAD children have you raised or tried to help? My guess would be ZERO.
Do you have experience in this or are you talking out of your ass. Anyone who knows anything, knows you are talking out of your ass.
Have you stepped up to the plate, have you played in the arena? Seems you are a armchair expert.
-
All right CG, first off? If you're going to change your name, at least have the dignity to change your writing style and lines of argument. TheWho is beating you in this, and he's as transparent as fetus skin.
Sequence should read, adoped a RAD child already messed up by someone else, pay with your soul trying to help, have the professionals blame you for the damage caused by someone else and risk the security of your natual family.
How many RAD children have you raised or tried to help?
So wait, you actually thought that you could adopt a kid with mistrust of anyone claiming authority and then magically, mystically, and probably through the power of JEE-ZUS, turn him into a loving, caring, little boy like some sort of shitty 80's cartoon (http://http://www.yuletidetreasure.org/archive/17/slavebear.html)?
This is hubris blended with idiocy. It's like combining Everclear with bleach and then chugging the whole thing.
No, seriously, is that honestly how you think these things work? What would possess you to believe this for a half second? What the fuck kind of books have you been reading, or not been reading? Fucking listen to yourself! Who the hell do you think you are? If you had some supreme psychological skill, deviousness, and/or at least a SHRED of real empathy you might have at least a casino chance at it. But this? THIS is how you're going to raise a child who spent his formative years in abuse? PffftttBWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! You've got to be joking. The wholly-conditional, self-serving lines of shit you pull on them, and are now trying to feed us, are worse than useless. You call this kind of shit love? I've seen used dog food more valuable than your love.
So why does CG want her kid out of CALO? Not because it's a shithole. Not because of the disturbing crap on their webpage. It's because...
RAD kids are professional manipulators and liars and CALO encourages the kids to be in control in these circumstances.
...she doesn't think CALO smashes down the kids' spirits ENOUGH.
This has got to be some kind of fucking record. She's playing in the WWASPS league now. C'mon CG! Swing for the fences! Let's see how much of a selfish, psychotic bitch you can be!
-
CALO makes it a point to allow teens to "choose" not to have contact and engage their parents.
CALO therapists have made statements that they cannot "MAKE" the children do therapy and talk to their parents. They will actively deny the parents the right to speak to their own children. Last time I checked, the parents have every right to speak to their child in most every state of this union.
Restricted contact between children and their parents is common in the Troubled Teen Industry, most times because the program needs a trained salesman in the clients ear to reassure that they are getting the service they are paying for. Therapy between the parents and children is also monitored in order to prevent the child from saying anything negative about the program, which is often referred to as "manipulation"... In any other therapy center this kind of practice would be highly frowned upon. I'm still surprised that program parents fall for this, and more so don't make some noise about these harmful policies. but honestly, sometimes the parents want their children out of their lives so badly that they will ignore all the signs. Ignorance may be bliss but it can ruin your child's life... so wake the eff up.
RAD kids are professional manipulators and liars and CALO encourages the kids to be in control in these circumstances. This just adds to the problems.
Wait wait wait, let me get this straight, children who have attachment issues are automatically professional manipulators? How is that conducive to repairing a strained relationship if you judge everything they say as some grand scheme?... Do you even want a relationship with this kid or is this more about your own issues and emotional voids? I'm sorry to break it to you but not every kid is required to love their parents and in many cases that's completely justified. You can't force your child to love and trust you, especially when you use tactics of tough love, excessive punishment and especially sending them off to a program. I don't understand the theory that program parents have that sending their child away could possibly improve their relationship, I have only seen it solidify the mistrust and in some cases HATE that kids come to harbor for their parents.
CALO does not hold kids accountable, they take the "punishment" out of relationships...what ever that means.
I don't mean to be attacking you CG, in fact I hate when people come on Fornits to attack parents, but what I just can't understand is why you could possibly be pissed off with a program because they aren't doling out enough punishment?... that is like the ultimate oxy moron... Do you even know what goes on day to day in a program like CALO? These kids are systematically punished every minute of the day, not to mention the fact you exiled them there in the first place, and its for some reason a surprise that they don't really feel like talking to you?... I'm sorry but that just makes no sense.
I support your vigor to go after CALO but GEBUS lady get a grip!! your practically a walking contradiction. I suggest you do some more research on the Troubled Teen Industry as a whole before you come onto Fornits hoping we will side with you on an issue like this, I'm sorry to say but you have got yourself ass backwards. Like I said, you have every right to be concerned about CALO, but its not because they are enabling your child's behavior, if anything, they are enabling abusive behavior toward your child and that is what should be of concern. Your child is not your enemy, stop thinking like he is and for the love of god try to protect him.
Just remember, and this is true for all program parents, the program can only hurt your child if you let them, if your bigoted enough to fall for their tough love marketing scheme and ignorant enough to keep believing their lies despite all the information available for you to see the truth, then you deserve for your kid not to love you.
quoted for epic truth[/color]"]Sounds like the only thing a "reactive attachment disorder" kid does is treat you with exactly as much respect as you deserve.
-
[
RAD kids doing the above should never be in control of their parents
.
No one can control you if you don't let them
If the parents are "abusers" then fine. However, for the "normal" parent who isn't an abuser
,
depends on what is considered "normal" By the way do you know or care why he doesn't want to talk with you? Maybe it has something to do with knowing he is not considered part of your "natural family" and resents your power struggle?
what.
CALO does not hold kids accountable, they take the "punishment" out of relationships...what ever that means. That is the doctor spock treatment, it didn't work 30 years ago and it doesn't work now. After all, aren't all his kids in jail? At least that is what I heard.
Uh you "heard" that? Actually his kids have never been in jail; I'll bet you "heard" that CALO is a great place
Also I would like Ken to define for us what an abuser is....and the diffence between discipline and punishment...is it normal discipline, a boot in the ass, yelling, in-your face accountability, or actual real life consequences for certain actions???????? Which is it Ken???
After all, doesn't a football, wrestling or hockey coach do that???? Then again Ken seems to be the home-economics type.
:rofl: Actually in this world a coach with his boot up the ass of a student would be fired and sued.
.
CALO is a cash register, performing R&D on our children at thier's and our families expense to further tweak, advertise and gain market control for thier snake-oil, unproven model
. Duh, hello, they are ALL like that. A little slow on the uptake, aren't you?
Let's shut them down, hold each and every one of them personally and professionally responsible, get refunds and possibly punative damages and make sure they don't ever get a chance to work with kids again. Let's send them back to Utah where they belong.
So you would be happy if "your" child was punished more and it cost you less? Sort of like K-Mart meets Guantanamo...
You actually make a really good case for leaving "your" child at CALO; there really are some people and home environments that are so vile that CALO is actually an improvement
-
Seems like Femanon has it right, the rest of you need help, and I am not looking for your support or to convince you of anything. I don't need you to tell me I'm right or wrong or to make assumptions about things, that you have no clue what you are talking about.
I am seeking out parents and children who have direct experience with CALO who can truly expose them for what they are and hope it doesn't happen again.
The rest of you seem like kids that do hate their parents or have been in these programs but have not learned a damn thing that your parents were trying to teach you before you got placed there.
Quite simply, it was the bad behavior that got you there. So how are your ramblings going to help from someone else getting put into CALO. Difference between you and me boys. What are you doing? Because I wasn't the one who put my child in there, you got that from now on?
For those "real" parents that have tried everything to help these kids, we are rewarded by exactly what you and the rest of the so called professionals do. You blame the parents. Where is your accountability?
It's easy to blame the fact you didn't get your wheaties or you weren't breast fed or your older sister got all the attention, isn't it. When push comes to shove, it's all an excuse.
There has been alot tougher people in history that have overcome much more worse situations than yours.
In my household, my childrent are my life. Adopted and/or RAD children have been loved and treated equally, even more than the biological children. We have spent 85% of our time on the RAD kids and the remaining on the natural children. And what are we doing to the other children that only get the 15%. What new disorder is watiting to be named for them by the "professionals"
So if RAD kids have most of our attention, treated equally well or better, have been made part of the family, why do they continue to hurt the others.
Well here's the answer, 75% of RAD starts off in the womb and for the 1st 3 years of life. By the time they come to us. 75% of the damage is already done. These kids hurt and they don't know why and they want others to feel their pain.
So for all you litte hate mongers...it is not our fault your parents were junkies or didn't give you the nurturing necessary for babies to bond to and trust their parents. We are the ones trying to help you.
After all, I don't do drugs, my natural childrent don't do drugs but the RAD ones do. All kinds too.
I don't molest children, but the RAD kids do. The natural ones don't
I'm not out breaking the law, skipping school, scarring my body, destroying other peoples property and lieing like it's no tomorrow. No judgments here "Guest" it's a fact.
I care for others, yet the RAD cares for only what they want. Immediate gratification.
It's your actions that got you landed in places like CALO. If your parents are as bad as you say, why aren't they in jail. If you've learned this from them as you claim then they should be in jail, along with the ones that perpetuate this lie, meaning CALO.
I'll bet your parents warned you constantly that this was going to happen, but guess what, you didn't listen and you didn't care. Well here it is. I don't like CALO as much as you. I certainly don't like the asshole parents that may have abused you, I down right detest the junkie, no good parents that abandons their child.
Just don't blame the ones who tried to help. When you are 18 and continue to act the way you have, you can look forward to a life spent in jail, this is not my opinion this is simply a fact. A judge won't care your parents were assholes. So grow up become real men and women and don't continue the cycle that you are a part of. Learn from it and take some damn action like I am instead of just complaining about it all the time.
CG
-
you keep talking a lot of shit CG. All about everyone else here and the action your taking is really just a self-serving attempt to recoup your fical. losses and doesn't have a damn thing to do with calo exploiting kids in their care. You seem to care more about pecking at others and will therefeore receive the same in kind.
I'm so sorry for your kid. I think you're a total shit
-
Acutally, I'm sorry to. I'm sorry for the children who feel they must act this way. I'm sorry for the real prents trying to help and I feel sorry for those pretenting to help such as CALO. CALO is nothing short of predatory.
Parents sought CALO out to help these kids and they did nothing, even made the situation worse.
As far as recouping the cash. In an adult world that is what is required by law. Are you suggesting or would you rather it be setted another way? I'm sure somehthing can be arranged if that is what you prefer. This is what happens when you promise one thing and deliver another Ken. I've kept my word but you haven't.
As far are caring for the child, we should recoup the cash, slap you in the face with it and use it to seek help elsewhere, REAL help. Because we all know what evil bastards and shitbags you are.
Shame on us for believing CALO, we will never make that mistake again. CALO is also going to pay for it's mistakes.
CG
-
:rofl: :roflmao: :rofl: :roflmao: :feedtrolls: :feedtrolls: :feedtrolls: :feedtrolls: :spam:
Acttually on the troll-o-meter, not too bad; he has gotten a few pretty excited.
If you are not a troll then you are reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally slow on the uptake if you have not figured out by now that you are not going to find the parents you profess to want to find here. Um, you keep doing the same thing expecting a different result :wall: ; some would call that insanity.
:roflmao:
-
I find this absolutely fascinating. I was never expecting an actual three-way hatefight. I have honestly never seen anything like this. She parrots the standard programmie bullshit- "your own behavior" without due process, "accountability" (oh god, how many times THAT word's been misused..), the whole nine yards- and then turns around and bitchslaps CALO.
I am awed. Absolutely, completely, awed. It's like watching an experienced burglar and a member of the Mafia beat the shit out of each other for being thieves.
There was discussion once about having a program that's more like a resort than what we fight here; that parents would be deluded into believing their children would have their spirits broken while staff + students were laughing it up together in reality. Such an idea never bore fruit. There was also some half-joking that parents would actually sue because their children weren't being abused and God damn it, that was what they PAID for.
Now we see that this is ACTUALLY WHAT HAPPENS, when there's even an APPEARANCE that the abuse might be less than sufficient.
Ken Huey. You now have a level of respect I seldom afford programmies (which is any). I could never have imagined that you could be in such diametric opposition to a woman who would normally be part of your clientele.
Curious George. You are in a class of monsters seldom seen on this forum. Your concepts of child rearing LEAD DIRECTLY TO the behaviors you are ostensibly trying to prevent. If you are an actual living, breathing human, kill yourself and hope Satan has mercy. If you're actually fictional, your author gets an 11/10 for Grade Fucking A Quality and I'd love to share a beer with him.
-
We have spent 85% of our time on the RAD kids and the remaining on the natural children. And what are we doing to the other children that only get the 15%.
If your natural children hadn't had the RAD kids as shielding against your "care", they'd be a lot worse off.
-
Just don't blame the ones who tried to help. When you are 18 and continue to act the way you have, you can look forward to a life spent in jail, this is not my opinion this is simply a fact. A judge won't care your parents were assholes. So grow up become real men and women and don't continue the cycle that you are a part of. Learn from it and take some damn action like I am instead of just complaining about it all the time.
CG
I can understand how it would look like we have some grudge against parents, and maybe some on here do, but I can tell you that is simply not the case with me. My mother and I have a pretty good relationship and I happen to admire her for all the hard work she put into raising me. I am also no longer a teen, I am actually well on my way to 30, I am certainly not in jail or a drug user and I have quite a fulfilling career and even more purposeful hobbies... However I was once defined as an out of control teen, defiant, rebellious and definitely a bit detached from my parents. But that doesn't mean I had some disorder I overcame, all that was, was a healthy distrust of authority. I just wanted to be an adult, albeit too early but I believe my behavior was not out of control, just not appropriate for my age. All that fell into place as I became of age, it seems like even though my decisions caused turmoil in my teens, those lessons I learned led me to become the responsible adult I am today.
Since your new I'll give you some semblance of the benefit of the doubt, you may be confused or maybe a little crazy but I'd advise you to take a step back and try to understand this situation from a different angle. Its obvious you are a person who values respect and holds your family in high priority, possibly a bit strict when it comes to parenting, but behind your draconian methods there is love, and genuine concern for your child's future. I can guess that you have a certain way of dealing with misbehavior and that is usually no tolerance, and appropriate consequences.
This kind of parenting style is common, and in most cases considered effective, but something you need to understand is that not ALL children respond well to this kind of authoritarian behavior. In some cases it only fuels the flames, and can create serious issues for a child with a rebellious personality. You need to realize that your style of parenting might be exactly what is pushing your children away from you, especially those who have a pre-disposition to having a lack of trust for authority figures. You cant assume just because you are the adult that your children wont question your logic, the reality is, your human and they have every right to question your judgment.
You see, kids who have developed problems with authority just want to be in control of their own lives, make their own decisions and be treated with respect. That's really not too much to ask in the adult world but since this person is a minor, often times those demands are overlooked in a parents desperation to protect their child.
You arent expected to be your child's best friend and let them run around like wild men, you just need to learn how to communicate. Communication is different for every individual relationship, don't assume that if one tactic works with one kid it should automatically work for the others as well. You have to cultivate a personal repore with your child which includes what consequences are effective and which punishments may exacerbate the issue and entice more acting out behavior.
well like I said, I'm not here to attack you, and I would advise taking some of the things people say here with a grain of salt but that doesn't mean that you don't have any room to take a second glance at your decisions and your life and make some re-corrections. It doesn't matter how old you are you never stop learning so try to be open to exploring new avenues of working these things out with your children. Sometimes just making the effort to meet them half way makes all the difference.
-
The best of quotes of the curious George troll
RAD kids are professional manipulators and liars and CALO encourages the kids to be in control in these circumstances. This just adds to the problems.
RAD kids doing the above should never be in control of their parents. If the parents are "abusers" then fine. However, for the "normal" parent who isn't an abuser, then the kids should never be allowed to choose to ignore the ones holding them accountable for their actions. What will happen if this type of Kid hits the streets at 18? Then they will really learn that society or the police don't care about them at all. We are the only ones who truly care. The rest of the world will let them die in a gutter. Just ask CALO if they have helped anyone once the money for their tuition stops. Once the money stops, the trust of care stops and then we know what is what.
CALO does not hold kids accountable, they take the "punishment" out of relationships...what ever that means. That is the doctor spock treatment, it didn't work 30 years ago and it doesn't work now. After all, aren't all his kids in jail? At least that is what I heard.
Also I would like Ken to define for us what an abuser is....and the diffence between discipline and punishment...is it normal discipline, a boot in the ass, yelling, in-your face accountability, or actual real life consequences for certain actions???????? Which is it Ken???
After all, doesn't a football, wrestling or hockey coach do that???? Then again Ken seems to be the home-economics type.
Che,
I agree. I don't think RAD is legitimate either. Whether this is RAD, bi-polar, ADHD or green eggs and ham, I can't tell you. I agree that it's a label for something no one really understands at this moment in time. What we do know is the behaviors are very similar, almost identical. I know of families with "RAD" kids who are now adults and their behavior has not changed. Some are currently serving 30 years for molesting their own children. So the abuse goes on, lives are destroyed and no-one is accountable. Even this person will get out of jail, probably in the next 5 years and begin the process again.
As always, when pushed and ultimately cornered, the "professionals" then turn on the parents, start pointing fingers and blame them. Maybe it's true for abusive parents, but what about the ones that don't abuse the children....they get blamed as well. So CALO goes on with their happy lives, all the time being part of the problem and laughing all the way to the bank.
CG
As far are caring for the child, we should recoup the cash, slap you in the face with it and use it to seek help elsewhere, REAL help. Because we all know what evil bastards and shitbags you are.
Shame on us for believing CALO, we will never make that mistake again. CALO is also going to pay for it's mistakes.
CG
I am seeking out parents and children who have direct experience with CALO who can truly expose them for what they are and hope it doesn't happen again.
The rest of you seem like kids that do hate their parents or have been in these programs but have not learned a damn thing that your parents were trying to teach you before you got placed there.
Quite simply, it was the bad behavior that got you there. So how are your ramblings going to help from someone else getting put into CALO. Difference between you and me boys. What are you doing? Because I wasn't the one who put my child in there, you got that from now on?
For those "real" parents that have tried everything to help these kids, we are rewarded by exactly what you and the rest of the so called professionals do. You blame the parents. Where is your accountability?
It's easy to blame the fact you didn't get your wheaties or you weren't breast fed or your older sister got all the attention, isn't it. When push comes to shove, it's all an excuse.
There has been alot tougher people in history that have overcome much more worse situations than yours.
In my household, my childrent are my life. Adopted and/or RAD children have been loved and treated equally, even more than the biological children. We have spent 85% of our time on the RAD kids and the remaining on the natural children. And what are we doing to the other children that only get the 15%. What new disorder is watiting to be named for them by the "professionals"
So if RAD kids have most of our attention, treated equally well or better, have been made part of the family, why do they continue to hurt the others.
Well here's the answer, 75% of RAD starts off in the womb and for the 1st 3 years of life. By the time they come to us. 75% of the damage is already done. These kids hurt and they don't know why and they want others to feel their pain.
So for all you litte hate mongers...it is not our fault your parents were junkies or didn't give you the nurturing necessary for babies to bond to and trust their parents. We are the ones trying to help you.
After all, I don't do drugs, my natural childrent don't do drugs but the RAD ones do. All kinds too.
I don't molest children, but the RAD kids do. The natural ones don't
I'm not out breaking the law, skipping school, scarring my body, destroying other peoples property and lieing like it's no tomorrow. No judgments here "Guest" it's a fact.
I care for others, yet the RAD cares for only what they want. Immediate gratification.
It's your actions that got you landed in places like CALO. If your parents are as bad as you say, why aren't they in jail. If you've learned this from them as you claim then they should be in jail, along with the ones that perpetuate this lie, meaning CALO.
I'll bet your parents warned you constantly that this was going to happen, but guess what, you didn't listen and you didn't care. Well here it is. I don't like CALO as much as you. I certainly don't like the asshole parents that may have abused you, I down right detest the junkie, no good parents that abandons their child.
Just don't blame the ones who tried to help. When you are 18 and continue to act the way you have, you can look forward to a life spent in jail, this is not my opinion this is simply a fact. A judge won't care your parents were assholes. So grow up become real men and women and don't continue the cycle that you are a part of. Learn from it and take some damn action like I am instead of just complaining about it all the time.
CG
The best of quotes of the curious George troll
-
I agree with just about 100% of what you have to say and I am not in unyeilding individual. Yes I am strict, but I am also fair.
I am very happy things have worked out for you and I'm very happy that you have a fulfilling life and I appreciate your comments.
I have also tried all of your recommendations and the recommendations of the professionals. While I'm new to these forums, I'm not new to these issues. This is not news to me, I have been aware and put into practice all the things you mentioned and quite frankly it's the same old stuff CALO would say. I feel now that the change in consistancy in parenting suggested by CALO and other professionals probably have caused more problems.
Nothing, and I mean absolutely nothing has worked. I have adjusted in ways and changed behaviors based on professional recommendations more than I care to explain all in an effort to connect with this child. AND I have not given up, just tired of the professionals' promises of snake oil cures at huge costs to my family and the impact on my other children during the process.
I also understand kids want to be treated with respect and can and do challenge authority. I have no problems with this. However when challenging the parents authority will lead to someone getting hurt, killed or somone OD'ing, I draw the line. It's every parents responsibility to stop this behavior, no pauses, no explanations, it simply has to end now, no questions asked. In some states there are laws holding parents responsible for what their child does.
I'm interested in any further advice and possible solutions you can provide. So far the entire professional industry has been wrong. I'm not claiming to be right, but if normal parenting didn't work, revised parenting didn't work (just about every type we were made aware of) and the professional therapy didn't work, what's left for the child? Well at 18, jail or death happens next, and then there is no more room to connect.
still interested though in your thoughts. Maybe you've experienced something that can help us, and that is REALLY what I'm after. CALO garbage is secondary. The only thing I haven't tried, is to completely let go, but that's illegal in my state and immoral for me. If the child chooses not to have contact after 18, then that is their right and I will respect that.
CG
-
The best of quotes of the curious George troll
continued
Does anyone have any real, reliable information regarding the "abuse" at CALO?
Note that whenever CG refers to abuse related to calo it is always in parentheses.
Is anyone willing to reply?
Looking for some real answers to CALO issues
Have direct personal knowledge of events.
Will discuss.
Am also interested in whether a lawsuit or the possibility of a class action lawsuit is, has or will be filed by the parents.
Just so we are clear, I'm not interested in all the bullshit and childish remarks I see on some of these replies. I am a concerned family member that is seeking some real answers.
what about you accountability CG? What about your bullshit replies and childish remarks?
Guest,
Inevitable, meaning you are full of shit?
I'll put money down I outlast you. Never backed down from a good fight when it comes to people I care about. I'm taking this as far as it goes.
Go back to your crib and suck your thumb.
CG
Nice language for a serious minded “concerned parent”
And…
To WTF:
Your a friggin genious...you hit the nail on the head with ONE of your scenario's.
You can try and figure out which one makes you the happiest Einstien.
Would pick up if I could, would love to bust out if didn't have other obligations to worry about compounded by the fact it's currently illegal in the state of MO.
Don't need to go to jail by following your shit bag, moronic, juvinile advice. Like I said, either help or get out of the way. Certain people with brains would have already figured that out...not just the jagbags that shoot their mouth off without thinking.
CG
Hey Jesus
Go fuck yourself. Why don't you get nailed to the cross again. I am no bullshit artist. Will prove it. The only thing you sniff is the ass crack off a dead goat.
Stop pissing serious people off. It's bad for your health.
CG
Guest,
Let's. Is there a parent forum or do you know of another way to get in contact with other concerned parents?
CG
:clown:
-
I agree with just about 100% of what you have to say and I am not in unyeilding individual. Yes I am strict, but I am also fair.
I am very happy things have worked out for you and I'm very happy that you have a fulfilling life and I appreciate your comments.
I have also tried all of your recommendations and the recommendations of the professionals. While I'm new to these forums, I'm not new to these issues. This is not news to me, I have been aware and put into practice all the things you mentioned and quite frankly it's the same old stuff CALO would say. I feel now that the change in consistancy in parenting suggested by CALO and other professionals probably have caused more problems.
Nothing, and I mean absolutely nothing has worked. I have adjusted in ways and changed behaviors based on professional recommendations more than I care to explain all in an effort to connect with this child. AND I have not given up, just tired of the professionals' promises of snake oil cures at huge costs to my family and the impact on my other children during the process.
I also understand kids want to be treated with respect and can and do challenge authority. I have no problems with this. However when challenging the parents authority will lead to someone getting hurt, killed or somone OD'ing, I draw the line. It's every parents responsibility to stop this behavior, no pauses, no explanations, it simply has to end now, no questions asked. In some states there are laws holding parents responsible for what their child does.
I'm interested in any further advice and possible solutions you can provide. So far the entire professional industry has been wrong. I'm not claiming to be right, but if normal parenting didn't work, revised parenting didn't work (just about every type we were made aware of) and the professional therapy didn't work, what's left for the child? Well at 18, jail or death happens next, and then there is no more room to connect.
still interested though in your thoughts. Maybe you've experienced something that can help us, and that is REALLY what I'm after. CALO garbage is secondary. The only thing I haven't tried, is to completely let go, but that's illegal in my state and immoral for me. If the child chooses not to have contact after 18, then that is their right and I will respect that.
CG
Really? Do go on... :seg2:
-
The best of quotes of the curious George troll can be seen in Curious George's post history.
-
The best of quotes of the curious George troll
RAD kids are professional manipulators and liars and CALO encourages the kids to be in control in these circumstances. This just adds to the problems.
RAD kids doing the above should never be in control of their parents. If the parents are "abusers" then fine. However, for the "normal" parent who isn't an abuser, then the kids should never be allowed to choose to ignore the ones holding them accountable for their actions. What will happen if this type of Kid hits the streets at 18? Then they will really learn that society or the police don't care about them at all. We are the only ones who truly care. The rest of the world will let them die in a gutter. Just ask CALO if they have helped anyone once the money for their tuition stops. Once the money stops, the trust of care stops and then we know what is what.
CALO does not hold kids accountable, they take the "punishment" out of relationships...what ever that means. That is the doctor spock treatment, it didn't work 30 years ago and it doesn't work now. After all, aren't all his kids in jail? At least that is what I heard.
Also I would like Ken to define for us what an abuser is....and the diffence between discipline and punishment...is it normal discipline, a boot in the ass, yelling, in-your face accountability, or actual real life consequences for certain actions???????? Which is it Ken???
After all, doesn't a football, wrestling or hockey coach do that???? Then again Ken seems to be the home-economics type.
Che,
I agree. I don't think RAD is legitimate either. Whether this is RAD, bi-polar, ADHD or green eggs and ham, I can't tell you. I agree that it's a label for something no one really understands at this moment in time. What we do know is the behaviors are very similar, almost identical. I know of families with "RAD" kids who are now adults and their behavior has not changed. Some are currently serving 30 years for molesting their own children. So the abuse goes on, lives are destroyed and no-one is accountable. Even this person will get out of jail, probably in the next 5 years and begin the process again.
As always, when pushed and ultimately cornered, the "professionals" then turn on the parents, start pointing fingers and blame them. Maybe it's true for abusive parents, but what about the ones that don't abuse the children....they get blamed as well. So CALO goes on with their happy lives, all the time being part of the problem and laughing all the way to the bank.
CG
As far are caring for the child, we should recoup the cash, slap you in the face with it and use it to seek help elsewhere, REAL help. Because we all know what evil bastards and shitbags you are.
Shame on us for believing CALO, we will never make that mistake again. CALO is also going to pay for it's mistakes.
CG
I am seeking out parents and children who have direct experience with CALO who can truly expose them for what they are and hope it doesn't happen again.
The rest of you seem like kids that do hate their parents or have been in these programs but have not learned a damn thing that your parents were trying to teach you before you got placed there.
Quite simply, it was the bad behavior that got you there. So how are your ramblings going to help from someone else getting put into CALO. Difference between you and me boys. What are you doing? Because I wasn't the one who put my child in there, you got that from now on?
For those "real" parents that have tried everything to help these kids, we are rewarded by exactly what you and the rest of the so called professionals do. You blame the parents. Where is your accountability?
It's easy to blame the fact you didn't get your wheaties or you weren't breast fed or your older sister got all the attention, isn't it. When push comes to shove, it's all an excuse.
There has been alot tougher people in history that have overcome much more worse situations than yours.
In my household, my childrent are my life. Adopted and/or RAD children have been loved and treated equally, even more than the biological children. We have spent 85% of our time on the RAD kids and the remaining on the natural children. And what are we doing to the other children that only get the 15%. What new disorder is watiting to be named for them by the "professionals"
So if RAD kids have most of our attention, treated equally well or better, have been made part of the family, why do they continue to hurt the others.
Well here's the answer, 75% of RAD starts off in the womb and for the 1st 3 years of life. By the time they come to us. 75% of the damage is already done. These kids hurt and they don't know why and they want others to feel their pain.
So for all you litte hate mongers...it is not our fault your parents were junkies or didn't give you the nurturing necessary for babies to bond to and trust their parents. We are the ones trying to help you.
After all, I don't do drugs, my natural childrent don't do drugs but the RAD ones do. All kinds too.
I don't molest children, but the RAD kids do. The natural ones don't
I'm not out breaking the law, skipping school, scarring my body, destroying other peoples property and lieing like it's no tomorrow. No judgments here "Guest" it's a fact.
I care for others, yet the RAD cares for only what they want. Immediate gratification.
It's your actions that got you landed in places like CALO. If your parents are as bad as you say, why aren't they in jail. If you've learned this from them as you claim then they should be in jail, along with the ones that perpetuate this lie, meaning CALO.
I'll bet your parents warned you constantly that this was going to happen, but guess what, you didn't listen and you didn't care. Well here it is. I don't like CALO as much as you. I certainly don't like the asshole parents that may have abused you, I down right detest the junkie, no good parents that abandons their child.
Just don't blame the ones who tried to help. When you are 18 and continue to act the way you have, you can look forward to a life spent in jail, this is not my opinion this is simply a fact. A judge won't care your parents were assholes. So grow up become real men and women and don't continue the cycle that you are a part of. Learn from it and take some damn action like I am instead of just complaining about it all the time.
CG
The best of quotes of the curious George troll
continued
Does anyone have any real, reliable information regarding the "abuse" at CALO?
Note that whenever CG refers to abuse related to calo it is always in parentheses.
Is anyone willing to reply?
Looking for some real answers to CALO issues
Have direct personal knowledge of events.
Will discuss.
Am also interested in whether a lawsuit or the possibility of a class action lawsuit is, has or will be filed by the parents.
Just so we are clear, I'm not interested in all the bullshit and childish remarks I see on some of these replies. I am a concerned family member that is seeking some real answers.
what about you accountability CG? What about your bullshit replies and childish remarks?
Guest,
Inevitable, meaning you are full of shit?
I'll put money down I outlast you. Never backed down from a good fight when it comes to people I care about. I'm taking this as far as it goes.
Go back to your crib and suck your thumb.
CG
Nice language for a serious minded “concerned parent”
And…
To WTF:
Your a friggin genious...you hit the nail on the head with ONE of your scenario's.
You can try and figure out which one makes you the happiest Einstien.
Would pick up if I could, would love to bust out if didn't have other obligations to worry about compounded by the fact it's currently illegal in the state of MO.
Don't need to go to jail by following your shit bag, moronic, juvinile advice. Like I said, either help or get out of the way. Certain people with brains would have already figured that out...not just the jagbags that shoot their mouth off without thinking.
CG
Hey Jesus
Go fuck yourself. Why don't you get nailed to the cross again. I am no bullshit artist. Will prove it. The only thing you sniff is the ass crack off a dead goat.
Stop pissing serious people off. It's bad for your health.
CG
Guest,
Let's. Is there a parent forum or do you know of another way to get in contact with other concerned parents?
CG
Yes I am strict, but I am also fair.still interested though in your thoughts.
Maybe you've experienced something that can help us, and that is REALLY what I'm after.
CALO garbage is secondary. The only thing I haven't tried, is to completely let go, but that's illegal in my state and immoral for me. If the child chooses not to have contact after 18, then that is their right and I will respect that. CG
:feedtrolls:
-
I agree with just about 100% of what you have to say and I am not in unyeilding individual. Yes I am strict, but I am also fair.
I am very happy things have worked out for you and I'm very happy that you have a fulfilling life and I appreciate your comments.
I have also tried all of your recommendations and the recommendations of the professionals. While I'm new to these forums, I'm not new to these issues. This is not news to me, I have been aware and put into practice all the things you mentioned and quite frankly it's the same old stuff CALO would say. I feel now that the change in consistancy in parenting suggested by CALO and other professionals probably have caused more problems.
Nothing, and I mean absolutely nothing has worked. I have adjusted in ways and changed behaviors based on professional recommendations more than I care to explain all in an effort to connect with this child. AND I have not given up, just tired of the professionals' promises of snake oil cures at huge costs to my family and the impact on my other children during the process.
I also understand kids want to be treated with respect and can and do challenge authority. I have no problems with this. However when challenging the parents authority will lead to someone getting hurt, killed or somone OD'ing, I draw the line. It's every parents responsibility to stop this behavior, no pauses, no explanations, it simply has to end now, no questions asked. In some states there are laws holding parents responsible for what their child does.
I'm interested in any further advice and possible solutions you can provide. So far the entire professional industry has been wrong. I'm not claiming to be right, but if normal parenting didn't work, revised parenting didn't work (just about every type we were made aware of) and the professional therapy didn't work, what's left for the child? Well at 18, jail or death happens next, and then there is no more room to connect.
still interested though in your thoughts. Maybe you've experienced something that can help us, and that is REALLY what I'm after. CALO garbage is secondary. The only thing I haven't tried, is to completely let go, but that's illegal in my state and immoral for me. If the child chooses not to have contact after 18, then that is their right and I will respect that.
CG
I'm not sure that there is any magic bullet that'll do the trick. Rather, tweaking the circumstances a little here, a little there, might bring it into a more manageable realm. Probably never within an earshot of ideal, however. I do think kids wounded badly during their early growing years often lash out in anger at some point, not necessarily when the wounds occur, but when they are better able to lash out, lol. And thus you are in the line of fire.
Snake oil cures don't work though, IMO, as you yourself have unfortunately discovered with CALO. There is a whole industry exploiting folk like yourself, promising results, and touting themselves as "experts."
-
Hey Jesus
Go fuck yourself. Why don't you get nailed to the cross again. I am no bullshit artist. Will prove it. The only thing you sniff is the ass crack off a dead goat.
Stop pissing serious people off. It's bad for your health.
CG
:feedtrolls: ...
-
If that is the way you talk to "your" child I don't blame him for not wanting to talk to you.
-
curious george wrote:
curious george is a gay CALO troll who will suck any male off for $2
-
Playing that game will only cloud the issue.Then again that may be exactly what you want.
Anyone interested can read Curious George's posts to decide for themselves. As of this moment none of them are edited and only one has been deleted.
-
The best of quotes of the curious George troll
RAD kids are professional manipulators and liars and CALO encourages the kids to be in control in these circumstances. This just adds to the problems.
RAD kids doing the above should never be in control of their parents. If the parents are "abusers" then fine. However, for the "normal" parent who isn't an abuser, then the kids should never be allowed to choose to ignore the ones holding them accountable for their actions. What will happen if this type of Kid hits the streets at 18? Then they will really learn that society or the police don't care about them at all. We are the only ones who truly care. The rest of the world will let them die in a gutter. Just ask CALO if they have helped anyone once the money for their tuition stops. Once the money stops, the trust of care stops and then we know what is what.
CALO does not hold kids accountable, they take the "punishment" out of relationships...what ever that means. That is the doctor spock treatment, it didn't work 30 years ago and it doesn't work now. After all, aren't all his kids in jail? At least that is what I heard.
Also I would like Ken to define for us what an abuser is....and the diffence between discipline and punishment...is it normal discipline, a boot in the ass, yelling, in-your face accountability, or actual real life consequences for certain actions???????? Which is it Ken???
After all, doesn't a football, wrestling or hockey coach do that???? Then again Ken seems to be the home-economics type.
Che,
I agree. I don't think RAD is legitimate either. Whether this is RAD, bi-polar, ADHD or green eggs and ham, I can't tell you. I agree that it's a label for something no one really understands at this moment in time. What we do know is the behaviors are very similar, almost identical. I know of families with "RAD" kids who are now adults and their behavior has not changed. Some are currently serving 30 years for molesting their own children. So the abuse goes on, lives are destroyed and no-one is accountable. Even this person will get out of jail, probably in the next 5 years and begin the process again.
As always, when pushed and ultimately cornered, the "professionals" then turn on the parents, start pointing fingers and blame them. Maybe it's true for abusive parents, but what about the ones that don't abuse the children....they get blamed as well. So CALO goes on with their happy lives, all the time being part of the problem and laughing all the way to the bank.
CG
As far are caring for the child, we should recoup the cash, slap you in the face with it and use it to seek help elsewhere, REAL help. Because we all know what evil bastards and shitbags you are.
Shame on us for believing CALO, we will never make that mistake again. CALO is also going to pay for it's mistakes.
CG
I am seeking out parents and children who have direct experience with CALO who can truly expose them for what they are and hope it doesn't happen again.
The rest of you seem like kids that do hate their parents or have been in these programs but have not learned a damn thing that your parents were trying to teach you before you got placed there.
Quite simply, it was the bad behavior that got you there. So how are your ramblings going to help from someone else getting put into CALO. Difference between you and me boys. What are you doing? Because I wasn't the one who put my child in there, you got that from now on?
For those "real" parents that have tried everything to help these kids, we are rewarded by exactly what you and the rest of the so called professionals do. You blame the parents. Where is your accountability?
It's easy to blame the fact you didn't get your wheaties or you weren't breast fed or your older sister got all the attention, isn't it. When push comes to shove, it's all an excuse.
There has been alot tougher people in history that have overcome much more worse situations than yours.
In my household, my childrent are my life. Adopted and/or RAD children have been loved and treated equally, even more than the biological children. We have spent 85% of our time on the RAD kids and the remaining on the natural children. And what are we doing to the other children that only get the 15%. What new disorder is watiting to be named for them by the "professionals"
So if RAD kids have most of our attention, treated equally well or better, have been made part of the family, why do they continue to hurt the others.
Well here's the answer, 75% of RAD starts off in the womb and for the 1st 3 years of life. By the time they come to us. 75% of the damage is already done. These kids hurt and they don't know why and they want others to feel their pain.
So for all you litte hate mongers...it is not our fault your parents were junkies or didn't give you the nurturing necessary for babies to bond to and trust their parents. We are the ones trying to help you.
After all, I don't do drugs, my natural childrent don't do drugs but the RAD ones do. All kinds too.
I don't molest children, but the RAD kids do. The natural ones don't
I'm not out breaking the law, skipping school, scarring my body, destroying other peoples property and lieing like it's no tomorrow. No judgments here "Guest" it's a fact.
I care for others, yet the RAD cares for only what they want. Immediate gratification.
It's your actions that got you landed in places like CALO. If your parents are as bad as you say, why aren't they in jail. If you've learned this from them as you claim then they should be in jail, along with the ones that perpetuate this lie, meaning CALO.
I'll bet your parents warned you constantly that this was going to happen, but guess what, you didn't listen and you didn't care. Well here it is. I don't like CALO as much as you. I certainly don't like the asshole parents that may have abused you, I down right detest the junkie, no good parents that abandons their child.
Just don't blame the ones who tried to help. When you are 18 and continue to act the way you have, you can look forward to a life spent in jail, this is not my opinion this is simply a fact. A judge won't care your parents were assholes. So grow up become real men and women and don't continue the cycle that you are a part of. Learn from it and take some damn action like I am instead of just complaining about it all the time.
CG
The best of quotes of the curious George troll
continued
Does anyone have any real, reliable information regarding the "abuse" at CALO?
Note that whenever CG refers to abuse related to calo it is always in parentheses.
Is anyone willing to reply?
Looking for some real answers to CALO issues
Have direct personal knowledge of events.
Will discuss.
Am also interested in whether a lawsuit or the possibility of a class action lawsuit is, has or will be filed by the parents.
Just so we are clear, I'm not interested in all the bullshit and childish remarks I see on some of these replies. I am a concerned family member that is seeking some real answers.
what about you accountability CG? What about your bullshit replies and childish remarks?
Guest,
Inevitable, meaning you are full of shit?
I'll put money down I outlast you. Never backed down from a good fight when it comes to people I care about. I'm taking this as far as it goes.
Go back to your crib and suck your thumb.
CG
Nice language for a serious minded “concerned parent”
And…
To WTF:
Your a friggin genious...you hit the nail on the head with ONE of your scenario's.
You can try and figure out which one makes you the happiest Einstien.
Would pick up if I could, would love to bust out if didn't have other obligations to worry about compounded by the fact it's currently illegal in the state of MO.
Don't need to go to jail by following your shit bag, moronic, juvinile advice. Like I said, either help or get out of the way. Certain people with brains would have already figured that out...not just the jagbags that shoot their mouth off without thinking.
CG
Hey Jesus
Go fuck yourself. Why don't you get nailed to the cross again. I am no bullshit artist. Will prove it. The only thing you sniff is the ass crack off a dead goat.
Stop pissing serious people off. It's bad for your health.
CG
Guest,
Let's. Is there a parent forum or do you know of another way to get in contact with other concerned parents?
CG
Yes I am strict, but I am also fair.
still interested though in your thoughts.
Maybe you've experienced something that can help us, and that is REALLY what I'm after.
CALO garbage is secondary. The only thing I haven't tried, is to completely let go, but that's illegal in my state and immoral for me. If the child chooses not to have contact after 18, then that is their right and I will respect that. CG
As of now CG's posts are intact (un-edited). Read them in their entirety and decide for yourself.
-
well my best advice is to just take life as it comes, do your best and always make it a point to learn from your mistakes. As far as it goes for your son, he's got a whole lifetime of lessons ahead of him, believe me he WILL do things he regrets but he too needs to just keep in mind the point of having these experiences is comprehending the life lessons that comes with them, learning from his mistakes and evolving his sense of self.
I can't tell you how to parent your child but I can tell you how to look at the bigger picture here. There is no quick fix, hell I don't even think there is a long term fix but I do know that in time and with more experiences we all learn how to survive. He may be doing stupid stuff now, but in 5 years he'll look back and realize that he was being young and dumb and that in and of itself is the reason he went through these things in the first place, so he would be able to come to that conclusion.
I'll be the first to tell you raising a teenager is no easy gig, especially a teenager with special needs or behavior issues, there is no mathematical solution to make kids behave if they don't want to, but you can't just give up on them either. As much as you'd like to think that your family will live happily ever after, sometimes there's just nothing you can do. He's gonna have to face the world sooner or later and hes gonna have to do that on his own.
let me give you an example. When I got back from the program I was hellbent on making up for lost time, I smoked, I drank, I stayed out well into the wee morning hours... all the while I had a scholarship and 2 grants to go to the art school of my dreams... Because of my partying my mom decided that she didn't want to help me with the rest of my tuition and she locked me out of the house if I came home after 11pm. In my mind I was just having fun but in her's I was wasting my future. Thus became my time being homeless. I can't tell you what she did was the right thing to do, I still wish I could have spent that time of my life in college especially after missing high school entirely due to my stint in the program, but I'll tell you what, that year I spent on my own I learned more about myself then I ever would have being sheltered from the big bad world. There's no lesson like a real life lesson and I now know that real life is the ultimate tough love. Yes she eventually came back around, helped me get my own apartment and gave me a job in her company, she didn't just abandon me, I honestly feel like she simply gave me the freedom I always wanted and I just had to see for myself what that really meant. Today my mom and I have a good relationship, we got past the past, (we definitely don't throw it in each others faces) and we both respect each other more and more as time goes on.
I'm not telling you this will work for your child, I don't know him/her and I don't know you. but what I do know is how your son must be feeling. I can tell you he probably feels trapped, maybe that you are unfair or making the wrong judgment call for his life and he wants to control his own destiny. He might not trust you or anyone for that matter and feels alienated, different and a little bit hopeless. Which of course makes him angry, and as these feelings compile he probably gets overwhelmed, that's when he chooses to act out, usually to blow off steam or just escape his emotions but mostly just to do what he wants to do because that is the only way he can feel he is in control of his own life.
I'm no expert, but I've seen it time and time again, when kids make bad decisions they usually do it because they are pissed off or unhappy about something they can't control. If the root of the problem is that they want some control of their lives you should try to simulate that for them by always giving them a choice. say, okay son, you have 2 choices here, you can do drugs and destroy your life or you can wake the fuck up and do what you really want to do with your life. Inspiring them to do what they enjoy doing is the best way to do something like this... you can say, son, you can either sit around and smoke pot all day or you can practice (insert sport or activity here) until your the best in the school, you can't have both. Life is about choices and if you want all the nice things and want to go out and have fun and enjoy yourself you have to acquire skills to provide theses means... you surely can't live off your parents forever so you need to focus on what you want to do with your life and who you want to be. Do you really want to be a junkie when you grow up? The choice is entirely yours.
He needs to decide for himself, and for his future what HE wants, whats important to him and that's the reason he will CHOOSE not to throw his life away. Once he has his goals and aspirations in site, all these other bumps in the road are just what he needs to learn to get there. Have some faith, I believe everything happens for a reason and if your kid is smart, he'll figure this out, it is his life after all, he needs to.
-
@ Bi-Curious George:
There are three copies of that very long message on this thread. Would you mind deleting at least one of them.
Thanks.
-
Done (on pg. 6)
-
well my best advice is to just take life as it comes, do your best and always make it a point to learn from your mistakes. As far as it goes for your son, he's got a whole lifetime of lessons ahead of him, believe me he WILL do things he regrets but he too needs to just keep in mind the point of having these experiences is comprehending the life lessons that comes with them, learning from his mistakes and evolving his sense of self.
I can't tell you how to parent your child but I can tell you how to look at the bigger picture here. There is no quick fix, hell I don't even think there is a long term fix but I do know that in time and with more experiences we all learn how to survive. He may be doing stupid stuff now, but in 5 years he'll look back and realize that he was being young and dumb and that in and of itself is the reason he went through these things in the first place, so he would be able to come to that conclusion.
I'll be the first to tell you raising a teenager is no easy gig, especially a teenager with special needs or behavior issues, there is no mathematical solution to make kids behave if they don't want to, but you can't just give up on them either. As much as you'd like to think that your family will live happily ever after, sometimes there's just nothing you can do. He's gonna have to face the world sooner or later and hes gonna have to do that on his own.
let me give you an example. When I got back from the program I was hellbent on making up for lost time, I smoked, I drank, I stayed out well into the wee morning hours... all the while I had a scholarship and 2 grants to go to the art school of my dreams... Because of my partying my mom decided that she didn't want to help me with the rest of my tuition and she locked me out of the house if I came home after 11pm. In my mind I was just having fun but in her's I was wasting my future. Thus became my time being homeless. I can't tell you what she did was the right thing to do, I still wish I could have spent that time of my life in college especially after missing high school entirely due to my stint in the program, but I'll tell you what, that year I spent on my own I learned more about myself then I ever would have being sheltered from the big bad world. There's no lesson like a real life lesson and I now know that real life is the ultimate tough love. Yes she eventually came back around, helped me get my own apartment and gave me a job in her company, she didn't just abandon me, I honestly feel like she simply gave me the freedom I always wanted and I just had to see for myself what that really meant. Today my mom and I have a good relationship, we got past the past, (we definitely don't throw it in each others faces) and we both respect each other more and more as time goes on.
I'm not telling you this will work for your child, I don't know him/her and I don't know you. but what I do know is how your son must be feeling. I can tell you he probably feels trapped, maybe that you are unfair or making the wrong judgment call for his life and he wants to control his own destiny. He might not trust you or anyone for that matter and feels alienated, different and a little bit hopeless. Which of course makes him angry, and as these feelings compile he probably gets overwhelmed, that's when he chooses to act out, usually to blow off steam or just escape his emotions but mostly just to do what he wants to do because that is the only way he can feel he is in control of his own life.
I'm no expert, but I've seen it time and time again, when kids make bad decisions they usually do it because they are pissed off or unhappy about something they can't control. If the root of the problem is that they want some control of their lives you should try to simulate that for them by always giving them a choice. say, okay son, you have 2 choices here, you can do drugs and destroy your life or you can wake the fuck up and do what you really want to do with your life. Inspiring them to do what they enjoy doing is the best way to do something like this... you can say, son, you can either sit around and smoke pot all day or you can practice (insert sport or activity here) until your the best in the school, you can't have both. Life is about choices and if you want all the nice things and want to go out and have fun and enjoy yourself you have to acquire skills to provide theses means... you surely can't live off your parents forever so you need to focus on what you want to do with your life and who you want to be. Do you really want to be a junkie when you grow up? The choice is entirely yours.
He needs to decide for himself, and for his future what HE wants, whats important to him and that's the reason he will CHOOSE not to throw his life away. Once he has his goals and aspirations in site, all these other bumps in the road are just what he needs to learn to get there. Have some faith, I believe everything happens for a reason and if your kid is smart, he'll figure this out, it is his life after all, he needs to.
Hello, little man. Boy, I sure heard a bunch about you. See, I was a good friend of your dad's. We were in that Hanoi pit of hell together over five years. Hopefully...you'll never have to experience this yourself, but when two men are in a situation like me and your Dad were, for as long as we were, you take on certain responsibilities of the other. If it had been me who had not made it, Major Coolidge would be talkin' right now to my son Jim. But the way it turned out is I'm talkin' to you, Butch. I got somethin' for you.
This watch I got here was first purchased by your great-grandfather during the first World War. It was bought in a little general store in Knoxville, Tennessee. Made by the first company to ever make wrist watches. Up till then people just carried pocket watches. It was bought by private Doughboy Erine Coolidge on the day he set sail for Paris. It was your great-grandfather's war watch and he wore it everyday he was in that war. When he had done his duty, he went home to your great-grandmother, took the watch off, put it an old coffee can, and in that can it stayed 'til your granddad Dane Coolidge was called upon by his country to go overseas and fight the Germans once again. This time they called it World War II. Your great-grandfather gave this watch to your granddad for good luck. Unfortunately, Dane's luck wasn't as good as his old man's. Dane was a Marine and he was killed -- along with the other Marines at the battle of Wake Island. Your granddad was facing death, he knew it. None of those boys had any illusions about ever leavin' that island alive. So three days before the Japanese took the island, your granddad asked a gunner on an Air Force transport name of Winocki, a man he had never met before in his life, to deliver to his infant son, who he'd never seen in the flesh, his gold watch. Three days later, your granddad was dead. But Winocki kept his word. After the war was over, he paid a visit to your grandmother, delivering to your infant father, his Dad's gold watch. This watch. (holds it up, long pause) This watch was on your Daddy's wrist when he was shot down over Hanoi. He was captured, put in a Vietnamese prison camp. He knew if the gooks ever saw the watch it'd be confiscated, taken away. The way your Dad looked at it, that watch was your birthright. He'd be damned if any slopes were gonna put their greasy yella hands on his boy's birthright. So he hid it in the one place he knew he could hide something. His ass. Five long years, he wore this watch up his ass. Then he died of dysentery, he gave me the watch. I hid this uncomfortable hunk of metal up my ass two years. Then, after seven years, I was sent home to my family. And now, little man, I give the watch to you.
-
To the guest who’s all up on FemanonFatal’s ass, whilst carrying something (a watch you say?) stuck up his. What the – Funshine!?!
You’ve reminded me of something else I’ve read on this thread Grumpy Bear (http://http://www.yuletidetreasure.org/archive/17/slavebear.html).It’s rather a stunning work of fiction.
The connotations of the imagery are …well vivid.
-
@ Bi-Curious George:
There are three copies of that very long message on this thread. Would you mind deleting at least one of them.
Thanks.
Thanks, Psy! Someone in this thread is having a transference problem I guess.
-
apparently you've never seen Pulp Fiction...
-
And just so you guys know.. CG is legit.. CG might be a bit hard to accept given CG's points of view, but CG does want to shut down CALO. Whatever CG's personal stance is on raising children is of no importance to me. I do hope that CG get's her wish of giving Ken Hooey a good crack in his puss filled testicles before the worthless son of a bitch reproduces, again. Further, it would please me nothing more to see CG and friends successfully cause CALO to implode.
Last, I'm not going to judge CG as a parent when I've never met CG or her children. The internet has a bad way of skewing how we see people and rarely for the better. I do suggest to CG that you consider the ramifications of getting wrapped up in E-drama. They include, severe headaches, lack of sleep, alcoholism, sexual dysfunction, and bed wetting. Do you really want these things for yourself? I mean look at Psy and how he turned out... nuff said.