Fornits
Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform => The Troubled Teen Industry => Topic started by: Anonymous on December 02, 2008, 02:17:41 PM
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i'm a 16 yr old girl look for a boarding school to attend. i suffer from anxiety and depression and haven't been going to my public school for months. i want to go to a boarding school because they're small and more structured than my school. i believe the small setting would motivate me to do well and living away from home would improve my mood a whole lot. i'm terrified of therapeutic boarding schools. is there any normal-ish boarding school that would take me? if i was in 8th or 9th grade it would be no problem for me to find a school, but i'm in 10th. i have had pretty bad grades the past couple years but i'm considered talented/gifted etc. the real problem is that my life at home depresses me and takes away from my motivation to go to school and do well. i really think a boarding school would solve this problem. is there any school that can help a student like me get on track? again, NO I AM NOT LOOKING FOR A THERAPEUTIC BOARDING SCHOOL SO NO NEED TO TALK ME OUT OF ONE. i'm a troubled teen looking for a school. NOT a crazy abusive cult. and i'm in therapy and on anti-depressants.
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You're looking for a real, bona-fide boarding school that is not a cult. Wrong site... lol.
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You're looking for a real, bona-fide boarding school that is not a cult. Wrong site... lol.
I am a troubled teen though. I thought people here might know a bit about boarding schools that would take a troubled teen that aren't abusive/restrictive/cult-like etc.
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It is a difficult subject and your search will be hard and long.
I will try to explain without trying to insult you. English is not my native language so please excuse me.
First of all most boarding schools are businesses. They want students which function without problems in their environment. Students who needs extra care and nursing means extra expenses and then they can choose another. There are plenty of parents outthere, who find children generally disruptive outside family hollidays where they can show their stepford children off.
I am afraid that 99% of normal boarding school will see you as a too expensive kid to warehouse.
Therapeutic boarding schools are also businesses and many of them makes a business of finding problems they can solve. If you dont have all the problems, then they can place you in marathon group therapy sessions for +3 hours and believe me: At some point you will adapt the problems from other student and make them yours. It is called psycodrama and while it can be rather entertaining for the people watching it, it is not healthy for you. You are terrified of those places and frankly you should be. They will not be good for you.
There are other kind of boarding schools. Some are faith based. Unfortunately they read the bible as the man in the department below. They use texts as hard as a Donald Duck magazine as curriculum and people in college will laugh of you if you turn up with an exam paper from one of these places. Check if they use the ACE curriculum and stay away from them if they do. Another downside is the frekvent use of the paddle. The high score seems to be a program in Indiana where the boss thinks that is OK to use corporal punishment on babies.
I dont know that to recommend to you. We have a database with a lot of programs you should stay away from here (http://http://wiki.fornits.com/index.php?title=Main_Page).
How is your home depressing and are your parents on the look too?
In the later is the case, I will recommend that you ask some friend to protect you by holding on to some emancipation papers for you.
How are your language skills? Sometime a foreign boarding school could be the answer and in Europe we have a youth culture, which leaves you room for development. Even our continuation schools for troubled teens in Denmark offers weekends off campus within two weeks.
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I forgot to ask. What kind of talent/gift do you have?
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Dear Guest,
I will recommend that you ask some friend to protect you by holding on to some emancipation papers for you.
Oscar is right: you should have emancipation papers. These are legal papers that go to a court and result in a hearing to determine if you are capable of living as an adult. If you had a friend who could be trusted to hold these, they could be given to the court in the event you are held more than 3 months, or against your will.
Muuuuuuuuuuch better idea is to look around at your family and friends and see if there is someone with whom you could go live for a while. You could attend a different school in a different place and still have caring family around you, and contact with your friends. You might think that there is no one who would be willing, but I think if you asked around, you would find there are people who are kind and open hearted.
The programs for "troubled teens" are not to be trusted. Seriously. My dear, you call yourself a troubled teen, but this condition is absolutely normal for a person your age. You will grow out of it, as trite as that may sound. You will be all grown up in a couple of years and all this will be behind you.
Good luck, and please try to find a solution closer to home.
Auntie Em
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Seriously?
:feedtrolls:
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Seriously?
:feedtrolls:
This.
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Auntie Em is a reliable source on the matter, you can trust her knowledge in this.
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We cannot afford to consider this post as a troll.
Kids are dying outthere and many are struggling.
If they dont end up in wilderness programs or another residential treatment, the parents use the jails as hospitals.
Look at a message board like conduct-disorders. We are talking desperate parents seeking help in a country where there is no decent healthcare system.
They live with an ill son or daughter until they have no other option than calling the cops because they are being beaten up. Some have even pulled their off-spring from government lowcost warehouses for teens months before beause the poor bastard was beaten up there.
Here is a thread.
http://www.conductdisorders.com/forum/showthread.php?t=20336&page=2 (http://http://www.conductdisorders.com/forum/showthread.php?t=20336&page=2)
The story goes: daughter 17 is being pulled by her mother because she was beaten in the TBS. The daugther has her problems. Once home the daughter - bitter over being kicked out in the first place because the school said she need residential treatment and the parent listened - stole the creditcard belonging to the father. The police told them that they should press charges. The parent let their daughter go to jail where she was released once she had been in court with a court order telling the parents to be her jailers with overseing medication and curfews. At some point the daughter punched the mother after an argument. The daughter took off and are now reported missing. Rotsne has adviced the mother to accept that the daughter is only months from being 18 and that she perhaps should let this daughter try to find her own path. Unfortunately the state seems to put responsibility on the parents until the daughter is 21.
What can be done?
Back to this thread. We have to accept that teens are struggling. If they reach out and comes here they should not be laughed at or given rude answers. If with the risk of them being a troll, we should give them advice from our hearts. All too many have already died. We don't need to increase this number by turning them away from us.
Many of you found yourself alone after leaving the program.
I can assure you that there are many teens finding themselves alone BEFORE entering the programs.
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I'd recommend (only because I have friends that went to one, and I attended another prior to the TBS I was sent to....and because they are the ones I know in NY) Oakwood Friends School in Poughkeepsie, NY and Storm King School in Cornwall on Hudson, NY. They both would suit the needs you have expressed and both have freedoms most would associate with a typical college, while remaining structured.
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I went to the Midland School in Los Olivos California myself. Wouldn't say it is very structured.... Lots of fun though. I don't mind boarding schools myself after spending 2 years in one. A lot of people start screaming bloody murder about them and get all butthurt. A word of caution, just be aware you'll be away from home and the people at the school aren't your family. Structured or not it can get mighty lonesome. I know I felt it around holiday time when my own family was to lazy to make the trip down for thanksgiving dinner.
If you want more information on the schools affiliated with Midland I might.. just might be able to get in touch with someone who might just know someone. No promises though..
I really think you ought to give Aunty Em's advice a second look over, before you do anything else.
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Back to this thread. We have to accept that teens are struggling. If they reach out and comes here they should not be laughed at or given rude answers. If with the risk of them being a troll, we should give them advice from our hearts. All too many have already died. We don't need to increase this number by turning them away from us.
Many of you found yourself alone after leaving the program.
I can assure you that there are many teens finding themselves alone BEFORE entering the programs.
While I agree with what you are saying I fully support the right of the guests to say what they think as well. Fornits is about freedom of speech and rampant speaking out in group. Over the last few years more and more boards on this forum have become moderated. This TTI forum is as fornits used to be in the beginning, or so some people say. Here you can speak your mind about the need to be helpful, they can holler troll, and I can dig in my ass like I normally do anyway.
The OP does have the option of asking this same quesion in the Facilities Q/A forums where the moderated angry fist of god will smite down those trolls who dare defy the wrath of the mods.
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The more I know about all this, the more I notice that we all fall into the habit or trap of discussing the teenager as the problem. All of us, regardless of our view of the troubled teen industry, seem to do this.
Someone here (hurrikayne? che? antigen?) started a thread called "The Troubled Parent Industry." That characterization is dead on the money.
We must remind ourselves that the "problem" is rarely just one person in the family. The "problem" needs the participation of all family members in finding healing and solutions. The "problem" cannot be exported to Idaho or Utah or New York or Guam.
Auntie Em
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I'm the girl who started this post. My name is Natasha and I really am looking for help. I thought that people on this board perhaps have experienced similar things to me and could let me know what worked for them. I'm 16. I'm almost halfway through high school and it's not working. I'm failing. I'm sitting at home miserable every day. I just want to be in a place where I can go to school every day and do my work. My home is not that place. I appreciate the suggestion of moving in with another family member/friend, I'm looking into that. Also the suggestions of the two schools in NY, thanks for those. Unfortunately I now doubt my parents can pay for one of them, but maybe we can work something out. I just want to be able to get a high school diploma and go to college.
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What's with all the fake posts recently?
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Natasha, sorry to hear things are difficult for you, and I hope you feel welcome here.
If you feel comfortable, maybe you could tell us more about what is "not working." What's getting in the way of just going to school and doing your work? Or send me a private message and I'll talk with you privately. You will need to sign in to send a PM.
Auntie Em
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yup any of the "freinds schools" are good, as they are based on quaker philosophies, which in my opinion can be a very positive influence on a teen's life.
the problem with boarding schools is that although they may be more "stuctured", problems still exist. for example - most boarding schools are full of rich kids, as they are highly expensive. so expect alot of spoiled kids driving BMW's who do lots of coke on the weekends. Some schools take the structured thing too far, and are borderline abusive and could almost be considered lockdowns (e.g religious single-sex schools).
A good middle ground would be to find a school that is primarily a day school, but has a number of boarders. for example, Maine Central Institute. They are a great school - one of the top in the country. but it's also a public school for the kids in the county, and a private day school for kids out of county but within driving distance. so you have a whole variety of people - white kids, black kids, townies, hicks, suburbanites, city kids, and a variety of nationalities of boarders: Japanese, Chinese, Caribbean islanders, europeans, russians, canadians etc.. you also get quite a bit of freedom while still being structured.
there are still a few problems with the school. Prescription medication abuse is rampant (vicodin, oxycontin, xanax) as it is in the rest of maine, but mainly among the locals. There are outstanding kids there, but there are also many no so great kids there - junkies, teen mothers, a few local impoverished quasi-homeless kids. they all go to the same school. If your big on weed - theres plenty to be had in the fall. the problem is that it's generally pretty crappy stuff and the place runs kinda dry between november and may, hence the pill popping. The town is pretty poor and theres nothing to do. also, between november and march the days get really short and the temprature hovers around -10F.
the school will give you structure and supervision, and separate you from your current environment. BUT, if you think you will fall into popping pills, get depressed in the winter, and think your more likely to hang with the junkies and homeless than the internationals, then the school is not for you.
otherwise, MCI is a great school.
there are some other schools that are more on the "theraputic" side, but are still very liberal and dont restrict you that much, for example the king george school in vermont. Watch out for schools that claim to be "traditional schools" with theraputic elements though, such as hyde or hidden lake academy.
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yup any of the "freinds schools" are good, as they are based on quaker philosophies, which in my opinion can be a very positive influence on a teen's life.
the problem with boarding schools is that although they may be more "stuctured", problems still exist. for example - most boarding schools are full of rich kids, as they are highly expensive. so expect alot of spoiled kids driving BMW's who do lots of coke on the weekends. Some schools take the structured thing too far, and are borderline abusive and could almost be considered lockdowns (e.g religious single-sex schools).
A good middle ground would be to find a school that is primarily a day school, but has a number of boarders. for example, Maine Central Institute. They are a great school - one of the top in the country. but it's also a public school for the kids in the county, and a private day school for kids out of county but within driving distance. so you have a whole variety of people - white kids, black kids, townies, hicks, suburbanites, city kids, and a variety of nationalities of boarders: Japanese, Chinese, Caribbean islanders, europeans, russians, canadians etc.. you also get quite a bit of freedom while still being structured.
there are still a few problems with the school. Prescription medication abuse is rampant (vicodin, oxycontin, xanax) as it is in the rest of maine, but mainly among the locals. There are outstanding kids there, but there are also many no so great kids there - junkies, teen mothers, a few local impoverished quasi-homeless kids. they all go to the same school. If your big on weed - theres plenty to be had in the fall. the problem is that it's generally pretty crappy stuff and the place runs kinda dry between november and may, hence the pill popping. The town is pretty poor and theres nothing to do. also, between november and march the days get really short and the temprature hovers around -10F.
the school will give you structure and supervision, and separate you from your current environment. BUT, if you think you will fall into popping pills, get depressed in the winter, and think your more likely to hang with the junkies and homeless than the internationals, then the school is not for you.
otherwise, MCI is a great school.
there are some other schools that are more on the "theraputic" side, but are still very liberal and dont restrict you that much, for example the king george school in vermont. Watch out for schools that claim to be "traditional schools" with theraputic elements though, such as hyde or hidden lake academy.
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Hi. My name is Boris. I am Natasha's 15 year old brother. I am very concerned about my grades and the gangsta thugs at my public school. I want to enroll myself in a boarding school, but I don't know which one is good. I found fornits from my sister, and hope you can direct me to a good school. I DO NOT WANT TO GO TO A PROGRAM. Please don't talk to me about programs because I don't have enough money for that. I need an affordable boarding school that a 15 year old can afford. I am 15 and need a school that would fit my needs, which are special. I don't want to go to the same school as my sister Natasha. She is really mean to me and sometimes puts her finger in my butt unsolicited and it is unpleasant. That's the main cause of my decision to enroll myself in boarding school. I don't have a lot of money because I'm 15. I don't have parents who care so I need to do this without their knowledge. Please help me I am a very desperate teenager who needs a boarding school that fits my needs, which are special.
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She is really mean to me and sometimes puts her finger in my butt unsolicited and it is unpleasant. That's the main cause of my decision to enroll myself in boarding school. I don't have a lot of money because I'm 15.
Some boarding schools are programs in disguise, Boris. If fingers up yer poop chute are an issue we can eliminate Magnolia Christian Academy from yer choices.
I wanna hang out with your sister. she sounds like my kind of freak, yo!
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Hi. My name is Boris. I am Natasha's 15 year old brother. I am very concerned about my grades and the gangsta thugs at my public school. I want to enroll myself in a boarding school, but I don't know which one is good. I found fornits from my sister, and hope you can direct me to a good school. I DO NOT WANT TO GO TO A PROGRAM. Please don't talk to me about programs because I don't have enough money for that. I need an affordable boarding school that a 15 year old can afford. I am 15 and need a school that would fit my needs, which are special. I don't want to go to the same school as my sister Natasha. She is really mean to me and sometimes puts her finger in my butt unsolicited and it is unpleasant. That's the main cause of my decision to enroll myself in boarding school. I don't have a lot of money because I'm 15. I don't have parents who care so I need to do this without their knowledge. Please help me I am a very desperate teenager who needs a boarding school that fits my needs, which are special.
What the fuck? I came here for help. If you all don't wanna help me then DON'T. I don't need this crap. If you don't want to help me I'd really appreciate you didn't comment on this thread...
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I don't need this crap.
Then stop sticking your finger up Boris' ass!
::fullofshit::
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Try to ignore the noise, Natasha. The offer is still open to PM me.
Other good people to talk to here are psy, dishdutyfugitive, stina, antigen, hurrikayne, try another castle...lots of good people here who will be very supportive, I can't name them all. They've helped me so much in the last couple of years.
Auntie Em
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Try to ignore the noise, Natasha. The offer is still open to PM me.
Other good people to talk to here are psy, dishdutyfugitive, stina, antigen, hurrikayne, try another castle...lots of good people here who will be very supportive, I can't name them all. They've helped me so much in the last couple of years.
Auntie Em
THE LAST PERSON POSTING WASN'T ME! What is wrong with this site?!@ Is this all a big joke to you people? Antie you sound sooooo nice I wish I could just come live with you. If I PM you do you think maybe I can ask to come stay with your for a couple weeks? I owe my cousin a lot of money and if I don't give it to him I'm afraid he might beat me up. I'm REALLY scared and NEED HELP NOW
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this is my last post. congratulations, you've driven me off. ::) thanks to everyone who didn't bs me.
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:agree:
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this is my last post. congratulations, you've driven me off. ::) thanks to everyone who didn't bs me.
Look. In all reality, this is a site that primarily concerns treatment abuse and nonprofessional therapy cults. While your inquiry might very well have been valid, realistically, this isn't the place to ask. On an unmoderated forum like this, what kind of response were you after exactly?
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NO REFERRALS HERE. Seriously. Why would you come to a forum like this looking for a legitimate boarding school? Obviously no one here went to one. How did a search for a legitimate boarding school bring somebody here?
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Where do you find this info at all? Are all boarding schools not either businesses or faith-based?
No wonder she was driven here. And now we have pushed her on.
I could recommend a boarding school this minute, which would be something she could handle if it was located outside the United States. Unfortunately it is not.
The school in mention has a lot of bull-shit. You have to stand out in the rain to smoke tobacco. You have to wait until you are home with drinking alcohol (You can leave most fridays at 16:00) and you can not drink alcohol at all Sundays because you have to be back at the school about 18:00 SOBER! They have a lot of bullshit with music and plays etc. but their education are regulated by the Danish department of education. It would not be a place I would sent my children for one minute. The risk that they will join a bad peergroup after the boarding school time (which here are sober youth celebrating 9/11) will be too big.
But this young lady could go there and properly enjoy the stay. There is no therapy other than normal anti-bullying (The department of education has sponsored millions on say-nice-thing-regardless-the-fact campaigns in school. Students have to praise the kniferobber about his/her skills with a knife if they wont face sanctions from the school while their lunch money are stolen). Anyway I have spoken with "survivors" and they wanted to go there because I makes them a name having stayed at a contiunation school for no reason. Here is a link to the school; Osted Continuation school (http://http://www.ofe-skole.dk/HTM_Eft/eft_Efterskole.htm). It is NOT an referral as I find it a waste of both time and money to attend a boarding school giving you exact what you could have got in a public shool just to be able to wear "Inmate" T-shirts. If I got down our mainstreet, I can see several wearing "L.A. country jail - Inmate" or "Maricopa County Chain gang" T-shirts and most of them haven't even been in the US.
Unfortunately this young woman cannot speak Danish so I cannot help her.
Please: Answer my quistion - Where do you find a list of "normal" boarding school with prices as the young woman speaks of money shortages?
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What do you call people who believe everything they read on the internet?
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What do you call people who believe everything they read on the internet?
Don't know, but did you realize the word "gullible" isn't in the dictionary?
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What do you call people who believe everything they read on the internet?
I dont believe all, but I believe in not judging people in advance as the youth are judged once they enter a program.
I believe that speaking nice to each other achieve more than shouting and insulting.
As far as I know we can rant all we want here on this message board. We can also enter all kinds of other message boards and insert "pray for you" and "hug you" and "best wishes" while we tell a little about how ed-cons fool people can how youth are dying in program. While on other message boards we "are concerned" about the deaths and use the Fornits Wiki's as references.
Try to adopt a parent message board and speak nicely while you plant those little seeds of concern and worry in the parents. Actually it is both fun and rewarding.
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What do you call people who believe everything they read on the internet?
I dont believe all, but I believe in not judging people in advance as the youth are judged once they enter a program.
I believe that speaking nice to each other achieve more than shouting and insulting.
As far as I know we can rant all we want here on this message board. We can also enter all kinds of other message boards and insert "pray for you" and "hug you" and "best wishes" while we tell a little about how ed-cons fool people can how youth are dying in program. While on other message boards we "are concerned" about the deaths and use the Fornits Wiki's as references.
Try to adopt a parent message board and speak nicely while you plant those little seeds of concern and worry in the parents. Actually it is both fun and rewarding.
Program survivors have been burned too often and are naturally skeptical. In the past trolls have tried to get someone on Fornits to suggest a program, or "legit" school. If anyone rattles off vague praise for a place the troll scuttles away to research it. If they find anything negative they blast the shit out of Fornits as a whole.
If you're going to give these curious individuals' motives the benefit of the doubt you should tell them this forum is not the place to seek school information. Give them a link to a "safe" site quickly and if they keep posting and acting disgruntled - IGNORE THEM.
Sounds harsh but so is the TTI and they will go to any lengths to keep their businesses afloat. Negative post GAO press and a deepening recession will make the industry trolls more aggressive.
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Does there exist such a thing as "a safe site"?
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Does there exist such a thing as "a safe site"?
http://www.safe.com/ (http://www.safe.com/) :rofl:
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www.lemonparty.o.. (http://www.lemonparty.o..). oh never mind.