Fornits
Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform => Straight, Inc. and Derivatives => Topic started by: wesfager on February 02, 2002, 11:06:00 PM
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Does anybody have any information on anyone who started stuttering while at or after Straight?
Wes Fager
a serious researcher
wes@thestraights.com
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What about eating disorders Wes? I bet you would get some hits on that one.
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OK, I'll buy that. Right now I'm doing a special study on speech problems that could be tied to thestraights, but now that you brought it up, let's hear it:
-stuttering
-eating disorders
-sleep disorders including nightmares and insomnia
-bathroom problems (moving bowels,urination)
-menstrual problems
-anxiety
-depression
-PTSD
-difficulty in having relationships
-melancholia
-agression
-mental illness
-carving on one's body or picking at scabs or nose
-drug use or alcoholism
-ability to trust
-posture or bone problems
-compulsive thoughts
-stealing
-suicidal ideations
And other conditions anyone would like to discuss. The condition you mention. Did you have it before, during, and or after thestraights? If you had the condition before thestraigthts was it exacerbated or lessened during/after thestraights?
Thank you,
Wes Fager
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I now have pronounced anxiety. I did not have it before straight, although I think I did during the time I was there (who didnt?), but it was better described as pure fear. It has gotten slowly worse over the years...I have pretty rough anxiety attacks every now and then. I believe I am in a more or less constant state of anxiety to some degree, but I do recognize it and have learned to continue to be productive and functional without the use of medication.
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I understand what you are going through Carmel, I had a fear of being in public and still do, I don't like driving anywhere except of course to work.
I don't get scared about what people say, just the fact that if I find somewhere where there are too many people I become anxious and jittery.
I enjoy being alone a lot of the time and being inside.
Another problem that I face is light sensitivity, I've never had it until I went into Straight. Since we couldn't be outside and barely see the sun, I need to wear sunglasses nearly 90% of the time unless it rains outside.
I can't open my windows much because of the glare of the sun, and at night sometimes the headlights blind me so much I need to turn my eyes to the opposite side of the road.
Did anyone else have that problem?
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Hi guys! Just found this and it has been answering several things I couldn't place. I was in Atlanta from '82-84, '86-88 (most of this time on staff).
Let's see from Wes's list:
*stuttering - when under stress
*sleep - I had to sleep with the light on for about 2 years.
* Depression
* PTSD - Not a self-diagnosis
* Difficulty in relationships - Translates doormat
* Drug use - stop 13 years ago
* Suicidal Ideations - I did not tell my threapist about this for fear of being locked up again.
One y'all forgot. Nightmares - I still occasionally have them after almost 20 yrs.
I think I am fairly typical coming out of there.
Clay
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Yeah nightmares still happen to me too and not even just nightmares sometimes dreams that relate to Straight. I have some real weird ones that seem so real.
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Clay,
Please email me. we need to talk.
Wes Fager
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i have all of the below:
-sleep disorders including nightmares and insomnia
*wake up screaming nightmares about 2x a week regularly
-bathroom problems (moving bowels,urination)
*nothing serious except for years i wouldn't use public restrooms.
-anxiety
*yes, about 1x week have panics over nothing.
-depression
-melancholia
-agression
-mental illness
-carving on one's body or picking at scabs or nose
-drug use or alcoholism
*i still use alcohol and ocassionally drugs
-ability to trust
-suicidal ideation
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hmmmmm . . . ok, after 24 years I carry the following baggage around.
1. PTS (not paralizing, but I still feel it)
2. dreams - I wouldn't really classify them as nightmares, but they are definatley stratight dreams. I don't even really have to be in a straight situations in the dreams, but I know I am there 'cause of the claustrophobic(sp) and intense feelings of needing to escape.
3. I get pretty confrontational w/my family when I am stressed.
4. Stuttering, sometimes - but I don't really know if I can attribute it to my 15 months in the program.
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Severe Anxiety, have to take drugs occasionally to control panic attacks.
Trouble sleeping and the occasional nightmare.
Depression - Aren't we all
Still panicked about being locked up after being out for nine years. In fact, I keep thinking they will find me through this website and come get me. They can't.... right?
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On 2002-06-12 06:28:00, Maddie May wrote:
I keep thinking they will find me through this website and come get me. They can't.... right?
LOL, no. :smile:
From what I heard at the conference last weekend, the masterminds behind Straight (Semblers and Newtons) are runnin' scared -- both families hired security to watch their houses that weekend. Funny, if they really think their programs did so much to help kids, then why did they hire security to keep those now grown-up kids at bay?
I know the fear/paranoia you feel though. I was severely depressed and angry both before and after Straight, but it was years before I sought the professional help I needed because I was scared I'd go into a psychiatrist's office, hear a door shut me, and be locked up for another 15 months.
Mindi
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I only stutter when Mindi is around...
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On 2002-06-14 15:33:00, Cleopatra2U wrote:
From what I heard at the conference last weekend, the masterminds behind Straight (Semblers and Newtons) are runnin' scared -- both families hired security to watch their houses that weekend. Funny, if they really think their programs did so much to help kids, then why did they hire security to keep those now grown-up kids at bay?
I know the fear/paranoia you feel though. I was severely depressed and angry both before and after Straight, but it was years before I sought the professional help I needed because I was scared I'd go into a psychiatrist's office, hear a door shut me, and be locked up for another 15 months.
Mindi
I know, I know! We just want to thank them for all the help and they keep running away from us :???: (NOT!)
I still feel I've had just about all the help I can stand. I figure there's no discipline of study that a typical person with more than typical interest can't understand if they dry. Why in the hell would I wan't to walk into a situation where I have to trust my layman self to someone who's mastered psychological manipulation? Pass, thanks. I'll just pour my heart out to good and trusted friends.
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I have sleep disorders and have had bad dreams like when I'm running away from them [$traight staff] and there chasing me but I seem to be running in slow motion and they run fast and right before they catch me I wake up with mt heart racing, I really hate that one! I have anxiety, I would think eveyone who was in $traight has that.I have Depression,physical problems,PTSD? I haven't seen anyone or have had any kind of help in any way I'm just left to flap in the breeze like so many others I would imagine. I was in St. Pete in around "80" it was a hot hell hole they used alot of sleep depravation on me to help break me down. They would move me around alot far away so it took along time to transport me,therefore cutting my sleep time even farther.I remeber one of the times that I said I was 18 and they had no right to keep me here and Miller Newton took me to his house after one of the open meetings from hell he [Newton] kept drilling me on how there was something wrong with me for wanting to leave the program and that he would get a court order to keep me there or send me to mental institution.This goes on all nite I would get to sleep about 4am after of course your final brainwashing and demoralization of the day called a moral invantory. Then they would wake me up at 6am and my no sleep nightmere would start all over again.
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Hey - that sucks what Newton did to you. I was in the program '78 - '80. We were probably in around the same time. Newton was an ass - I don't even worry about him anymore, cause with the shit he did on this earth, the afterlife is gonna be far worse than anything I could give him. So Miller . . . if your'e lurking out there, you better hit your knees tonight and ask forgiveness and then practice whatever number that amends step was. I am expecting a phone call or email w/your apology; I'm sure you know who I am.
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On 2002-06-15 18:05:00, Antigen wrote:
I still feel I've had just about all the help I can stand. I figure there's no discipline of study that a typical person with more than typical interest can't understand if they dry. Why in the hell would I wan't to walk into a situation where I have to trust my layman self to someone who's mastered psychological manipulation? Pass, thanks. I'll just pour my heart out to good and trusted friends.
It's good that you have friends like that that you can talk to. I've found that friends, no matter how well-meaning, often have another person's agenda in mind when a friend comes to them with a problem -- their own. This is not necessarily a bad thing, but to me, there is something to be said for plopping down a $20 co-pay every two weeks to speak with a therapist who is, if not completely objective, much more so than most of my friends.
You probably don't have a chemical imbalance, at least not one that's so strong it affects your everyday life. Me, I have what they call severe depression, and taking medication and seeing a therapist regularly keeps me from wanting to hide in bed all day and from having suicidal thoughts.
What bugs me, personally, most about Straight was the lack of any certified mental health professionals, or even LCSW's, on staff. IMO, adolescent alcohol and drug abuse is almost always a symptom of a greater problem, such as depression, and not the problem in and of itself. I can't help but wonder how I would've turned out if someone had bothered to ask me WHY I drank and did drugs instead of berating me for having done them.
Mindi
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In regards to the inquiry of stuttering, anxiety, eating disorders, etc., I feel I need to speak on behalf of my beautiful, brilliant best friend. I met my friend in 1986 after she got out of straight and her family had moved to my town.
She tended to be a loner, artistic.. but we clicked and emotionally connected. Although, from day one, it was evident that she was highly anxious. Through time, she told me bits & pieces about straight. As young as we were (16) at the time, I did not realize that her panic attacks while driving, or her fear of our "chinese food"
(forgive me MF,, I hope we can laugh about it now) being poisoned and the host of other issues, like Carving into her skin, could have been brought on by STRAIGHT. My dear friend suffered from these feelings for Years! She was quite literally robbed of her youth. I hurt for her knowing all of the torment she experienced during and after being kidnapped and brought to Straight, the suicide watches, etc. To my knowledge, she also endured being coerced into sexual confessions, sleep deprivation and GOD only knows what else. She witnessed suicide attempts and I believe a child did pass during her "lock-up". How could one NOT have PTSD??
I couldn't fully appreciate what she had been through when we were younger, but I never judged her, I just stayed by her side as a friend. Now as an adult and after reading The Straights, and several postings on this site as well, I can truly appreciate the torment she incurred. But what I can't understand is WHY?? and how did Straight manage to exist for so long? It reminds me of a modern day Shawshank Redemption in some ways. God bless those of you who have survived Straight!!
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I feel for you friend I have anxiety attacks and it really makes life difficult. I think they were brought on by Straight. You are a good friend for going and learning about Straight. It is difficult for some people to understand how life changing it is. Some of my friends try to understand and learn about it and others just say get over it. Which is virtually impossible. Whoever you friend is introduce her to these sites! At first it is totally like digging up all the pain and it is totally raw all over again but then you actually do start to heal. Finally. There really was no healing for me before this it just was kind of buried. Welp Sorry for the rant take care, kady :grin:
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Anonymous wrote that he beleives someone did pass at teh Straight that his female friend was at. Can you fiind out more about this. Who? Which Straight? How? When? I am doing a serious study on this and it is extrmely important.
Thank you,
wesfager@thestraights.com