Fornits
Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform => Straight, Inc. and Derivatives => Topic started by: Anonymous on May 10, 2007, 09:27:48 PM
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Does anyone remember the seven steps. I know they were posted on the wall in the building and those doing the replica would like to put them up; only problem is I can't help as I don't remember them. rofl , lmao.
Seriously, any help would be appreciated.
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You don't remember your steps??
You're started over, 3 & 14!
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:lol: I don' r'member my steps either...only steps I remember are the ones I took through that psychedelic portal into the netherplane of breakdown and sacrifice after I got some space from the $tr8 cult and we ate that acid. Man, that was some incredibly psychotic time. To be restrained like that in every way... and then finally, incredibly released...I hated bein restrained but I was lost in the world when they let me go...
I was brokedown man. I figured since $tr8 was all about not expanding your consciousness, that in order for me to heal from that ugly cult I would do everything I could to detach myself from everything and be re-born somehow. So as soon as I's out 'a' my folks house, 'bout a year after I graduated I started eatin acid, and that was the first chemical I did when I gave up my arrested consciousness.
Eventually I had a nervous breakdown and was pretty well disassociating from everything. I don't mind tellin ya'll cause I'm a lot better now and can even draw on it to live, sometimes.
I remember one day. I was about 20. Outta $tr8 for about a year and a half. I'd been livin with this sweetheart that I'd been cliquin' with since she was introduced to group. We had an apt. in Annandale together(Oleander growin outside her door, soon there gonna be in bloom up in Annandale...)I guess we'd been together for about a year then, when we decided to get that apt. I had never had more then a summer job before then and I was all fucked up from $tr8. I couldn't concentrate on anything but tryin to remember who I was. I couldn't work, couldn't even hardly talk to strangers at all. I had trouble askin a stranger what the time was that was on their watch. I was so confused and paranoid and injured. I couldn't help with the rent.
So I'd been eatin acid as often as possible and taking any drugs that were offered to me. A lot 'a' coke in the landscapin truck, especially on rainy days in D.C.. The acid was cheap and the coke was all free. LSD and cocaine were both drugs I never did 'til after $tr8. I heard so many stories while I was in there of people who did those crazy drugs and lived to tell about it that, when I was still on first phase I resolved to explore all those drugs when I got out someday, my own self. Anyway, I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown, havin' all kinds of social and psychological crises one day when I took some acid and promptly discovered that I was locked out of the apt!! It was broad daylight, pro'ly around 12 or 1pm. My girlfriend was at work and I had been unemployed since we moved into the place. I remember how I walked along the busy road that day trippin myself to pieces, lookin at the trees as I walked by. The traffic was heavy as always, along the road I's walkin down, 'bout 4 lanes across and movin fast. I felt real vulnerable. I began to notice how each tree I passed was terribly scarred at just about the height of the bumper of a car. I had been sensing a pattern in my life for some time by then. I sensed impending doom. After i walked by several scarred trees, I had to stop and ask myself: what was the Universe telling me ?? I remember this one tree in particular. It's bark was all twisted and gnarled; scarred by automobiles who had hit it and raked it. It was a big, strong tree but had obviously flirted with death before. I remember bein in mental shock still from everything, and on my heels and how I was like the tree. The tree comforted me then. Just seein those scars in the bark let me know I too could heal and grow...All around me the world was turnin fast while that tree and I stood still...
It seemed that everything had been a lie and my mind was raped and left to die. That ol' tree told me some truth about people and our society and I was listenin and lookin. layin in wait for the wisdom of the most subtle kind. Wisdom that aint carried in words. I took the acid and wisdom from the tree, and walked in the sunshine, trippin through society. I felt the sickness and sensed the cure. I sacrificed myself. I died to the world.
Spit out of the mouth of that beast, to see what truth could be found.
Maybe somebody else remembers them...the uhh, 7 steps, I mean.
Whats up Cassian ?? You know, a nervous breakdown might be exactly what you need.
:D
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I guess that 18 months in that place put me in need of a lobotomy because I do remember them verbatim and I left that place(MORGAN YACHT)never to return almost 30 years ago.I finished the night the "Graduate Society" was renamed "The Seven Step Society".I think I am going to do a searching and fearless moral inventory and find out what the fuck is wrong with me.People have told me that I am blessed with this phenomenal memory but for me it´s a curse.I´m surprised that I don´t remember the color of each of those stupid pastel colored cards.Maybe we can submit it for a trivia question on "Who wants to be a Millionaire"?.
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Now, its driving me nuts. Could someone please post the 7 steps.
Many thanks rofl lmao.
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something about being powerless.... i think that was #1
it sure makes weak people feel good to destroy another human being...... wait, was that ME or my druggie self talking, or was that a voice coming from the radio.... no...... sounds like a hot water pipe and a voice is coming out of the drain... wait... am I in the drain pipe?
hmmmmmmm
nice job! $8t
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Something about being searching & fearless...for penis pumps? :rofl:
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Oh please, please put this in there somewhere.
God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good luck to run into those I do and the good eye sight to see them coming before they see me.
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1) Admit that I am powerless over being here.
2) Make a decision to leave.
All other steps are irrelevant........
I think someone posted a list of the steps and the other bogus, so-called "tools of personal change", the "serenity prayer", the "five criteria for rational thinking", and the "three signs". If you do a little "searching and fearless" perusal of this site, I'm sure you'll find it.
They were all twisted, sick tools of oppression and psychic assault, if not downright "psychic murder" as one psychiatrist phrased it. In the case of the "five criteria", they used what could have been a beneficial technique and corrupted it for their own sinister purposes. (The same could be said of the steps, but I think they are all bullshit to begin with, since they are the foundation of AA/NA and other lunatic associations).
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1) Admit that I am powerless over being here.
Yeah. How many times did I think those very words to myself as I sat in group in disbelief of what was happening. How many times I felt the weight on my head and wondered what to do...how to escape.
-pirate
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i dont remember the steps..i do remember getting a 7th step charm from idiot parents for completing the mind f#@* ...then pawning it soon after...'i did the time now i'm going to do the crime' was my thinking and i did and a breakdown followed for me as well....i wonder what the stats are for survivors...% dead % breakdown %talking to family NOT.....100% relapse or do drugs for the 1st time after hijacked from own life... then released as what??????WHAT did they do????HOW were they allowed to do it?????WHY arent they in jail????
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Because they're doing the work of the people who build the prisons.
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i wonder what the stats are for survivors...% dead % breakdown %talking to family NOT.....100% relapse or do drugs for the 1st time after hijacked from own life... then released as what??????WHAT did they do????HOW were they allowed to do it?????WHY arent they in jail????
You might want to include me in the stats of survivors living abroad so I can fit in some category,even if that being one of "Just Another Crazy Gringo".Anywhere we go,first impressions are important,and being as normal as I can be considering I went through an eighteen month mindfuck as a teenager,I don't really care to explain myself to any strangers.Whereever I go down here in Costa Rica,when people see me,all they think is "Here comes that crazy gringo!"and given the circumstances,that's fine by me!
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i hope you are happy down there in Costa Rica...i had to move out of FL - that crazy politically messed up state...but still in US...i have a hard time making friends....i just feel so unlike everybody else...i get along better w/ people about 20 yrs older than myself...prob b/c they have lived more...i still have yet to tell a single soul what i went through..or that i was even put in a place like that...i dont know if it is that i dont think anyone will believe me or the shame of it..i went through in the late eighties and it has taken me this long to even just write a little about it...who do you tell? what would they do? yet it is the first thing i want to tell people and appologize for ...for being so weird and explain that this is why...but i dont...so it is nice to be able to write here.....
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http://www.isaccorp.org/straight/straightbasics.pdf (http://www.isaccorp.org/straight/straightbasics.pdf)
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ISAC did a study of the effects for each survivor it use to be posted, how many speak to their parents , how many have neck and back probs etc.
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http://www.isaccorp.org/straight/isacsurvey.pdf (http://www.isaccorp.org/straight/isacsurvey.pdf)
I wish I had the chance to participate in this....I guess this was done long before I found the sites.
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stats are so sad.............could not read the steps?????can anyone read them? I would have to disasociate again......
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Do you mean the link to the steps is unreadable or you just cant bring yourself to read them?
It took me awhile to be able to read them again....yup because it was entirely too difficult to revisit them. Dissociation, oh yeah I am very familiar with that...if it werent for dissociation I never would have survived that hell-hole.
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the link is legible...sorry for misspellings....i just dont want to read them..to scarey for me right now and its been 20 years..how long did it take you to read them and was it healing?
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the link is legible...sorry for misspellings....i just dont want to read them..to scarey for me right now and its been 20 years..how long did it take you to read them and was it healing?
I thought so...just making sure.
It is scarey to look again after 20 years. I cant remember how long it took me to read them....probably not too long...I think looking at anything about Straight was scary as all hell.
Reading the steps themselves wasnt a healing "moment." But the entire process of overcoming my fears related to remembering Straight and all the particulars about it was healing....but it was (and still is) a very slow process. At first reading all of this stuff caused me to fall apart and end up in therapy with a PTSD diagnosis....but allowing myself to go there, work through all the pain it caused me etc was healing. But its different for everyone I think...dont force yourself to read anything unless you are ok with it.
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experiencing the world through the PTSD lens is so difficult for me on a daily basis...i would be afraid of having a nervous breakdown if I were to read the steps...and can not afford that right now...i have way to many adult responsibilities....healing is slow in coming...so has been good to write here and read good responses...thanks
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Reading the steps themselves wasnt a healing "moment."
I'm very sorry to hear that.
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hope site was a joke...these places cant still be in businesss??????
still confused as to how they were ever allowed to be in the first place???? I would like to recommend a good book...Power vs. Force by David R. Hawkins , MD PHD...Anyway PTSD has a cummulative effect...meaning it only gets worse... so is better to deal with cult abuse as soon as possilbe...only problem is dont trust anyone to tell of get help from....i'm sure that is exactly what the program is counting on..that we all stay to shamed and scared to say anything...get help.... but PTSD doesnt work like that.. it just wont go away like we have been trying to think the program did...its effects are long reaching...in there still wreaking havok...so is good to see it all for what it was and still does...then hopefully at some point it will no longer have the ability to keep hurting us.....................
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No...SIBS is very real!
Look closely and you'll see for yourself! :o
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hope site was a joke...these places cant still be in businesss??????
still confused as to how they were ever allowed to be in the first place???? I would like to recommend a good book...Power vs. Force by David R. Hawkins , MD PHD...Anyway PTSD has a cummulative effect...meaning it only gets worse... so is better to deal with cult abuse as soon as possilbe...only problem is dont trust anyone to tell of get help from....i'm sure that is exactly what the program is counting on..that we all stay to shamed and scared to say anything...get help.... but PTSD doesnt work like that.. it just wont go away like we have been trying to think the program did...its effects are long reaching...in there still wreaking havok...so is good to see it all for what it was and still does...then hopefully at some point it will no longer have the ability to keep hurting us.....................
yes there are Straight spin off's still open. So, Power v Force...does it discuss PTSD? So based on your research, does PTSD just disappear with therapy or just merely become more manageable, or under control? Personally I lean toward more manageable & under control but I really dont know the answer. Does a 20 year delay in seeking treatment effect one's ability to overcome this disorder? I know you arent an expert...I am just wondering if during your reading you have discovered any of these answers.
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I think ptsd is to be recoginized and managed..propranolol is a good drug for this..it helped me alot! i took 10ml for 2 weeks...look up drug for more info..... the way i understand it is it unwires the hardwired(bad memories)...adrenalin hardwires the brain and propranolol softens the adrenalin????? because ptsd has a cummulative effect the longer one goes w/o recognizing it the more severe the symptoms...irritability..depression.....its like an open wound and every little or big stress adds more injury until the wound is so big you cant ignore and have to deal...so i think it would be easier if you could recognize it earlier...but i manage and its taken me twenty years to talk about...i found the book help at any cost and it has started my healing..i was ready!...i watched some german holocaust survivors interviewed, who were imprisoned as children and one women said she did not talk about it for 40 years..unbelievable ...i think its worse for children b/c their brains are still developing????....anyway power vs force ..the hidden determinants of human behavior...is about consciousness...it is an excellent excellent book! and so is help at any cost...so grateful they were written
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1. Admit that I am powerless over drugs and come to believe that a power greater than myselfcan restore me to sanity.2. Make a decision to turn my will and my life over to the care of God as I understand him.3. Make a searching and fearless moral inventory of myself, daily.4. Admit to God, myself, and another human being the exact nature of my wrongs, immediately.5. Make direct amends to such people wherever possible except when to do so would injurethem, myself, or others.6. Seek through prayer and meditation to improve my conscious contact with God as Iunderstand Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for me and the power to carry that out.7. Having received the gift of awareness, I will practice these principles in all my daily affairs and carry the message to all I can help
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how 'bout... we admit that our power, human rights, and dignity were taken from us while in straight inc and to this day our power, human rights, and dignity remain Ellusive.. we were forced to be ok with things that were not ok ...to believe things that we knew were wrong...we were forced(and we can all give examples of this force) to go against our conscience.... to doubt the very core of ourselves..... the consequence of this is that now we dont make a move w/o doubt...have a thought w/o doubt...believe a friend or are even able to make one w/o doubt....trust a system w/o serious doubt...we dont know up from down..cant seem to find that inner compass to guide us along b/c it was shattered and everthing to follow suffers...i think i live life in a better place now but then there have been these 'forks in the road' pivitol life affirming or the other choices i am forced to make(usually i allow someone else to make them and that has been even worse b/c we need to learn to trust ourselves again and to forgive ourselves...we were children) ..and i seriously do not know right from wrong...utterly confused and consumed w/ doubt and i end up sabatoging myself and it doesnt seem like something i would do....this is the effect...?????????
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1. Admit to god, myself and others that I am powerless over drugs,
exept when and where to do so would injure myself or others.
2. Work to establish a conscious contact with god as I understand
him and seek to strengthen myself in all my daily affairs either
married or single.
3. Make direct amends to such persons whenever possible unless
otherwise directed by my attorney.
4. Make a searching and fearless Moral Inventory of myself daily
and keep it personal.
5. Strive to improve myself and my knowlege of drugs everyday
searching for better ways to redeem my stamps and help others.
6. Apologize to those I have trespassed against and surrender
nothing to those who have trespassed against me.
7. Having recieved the gift of Obediance, I will practice these principles in all my daily affairs, and hold the door open for those I can help.
I actually wrote pretty much these exact words in my M.I. Book while on 3rd phase and we were told to turn them in for staff review. Mine was gone over by Mike Murphy who probably had a fucking 3rd or 4th grade reading level. Staff was pissed that so many kids never really learned their steps and was trying to "prove something" or some shit. This was following some kind of OKTOBERFEST event that did'nt rake in as much money for the building fund as Executive Staff had hoped for. (Fall of 1978)
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how 'bout... we admit that our power, human rights, and dignity were taken from us while in straight inc and to this day our power, human rights, and dignity remain Ellusive.. we were forced to be ok with things that were not ok ...to believe things that we knew were wrong...we were forced(and we can all give examples of this force) to go against our conscience.... to doubt the very core of ourselves..... the consequence of this is that now we dont make a move w/o doubt...have a thought w/o doubt...believe a friend or are even able to make one w/o doubt....trust a system w/o serious doubt...we dont know up from down..cant seem to find that inner compass to guide us along b/c it was shattered and everthing to follow suffers...i think i live life in a better place now but then there have been these 'forks in the road' pivitol life affirming or the other choices i am forced to make(usually i allow someone else to make them and that has been even worse b/c we need to learn to trust ourselves again and to forgive ourselves...we were children) ..and i seriously do not know right from wrong...utterly confused and consumed w/ doubt and i end up sabatoging myself and it doesnt seem like something i would do....this is the effect...?????????
Yeah. Thanks for your post.
I read this book a while back called "Skeletons On the Zahara", bad-ass read BTW, that was about these cats from some New England port town, in about 1825 or so, who shipped out to sea for trade, but were instead wrecked on the notorious North African coast. After a few days in the life- dingy, without fresh water they finally found a break in the cliff wall, where there was a place to go ashore. They climbed the treacherous cliffs in the rags that they wore and when the capt. and his men reached the top, after having climbed above the sea all day, he saw nothing alive, only the Zahara desert, my friend...
They pressed on and were captured and taken into slavery by bedouin tribesmen. They were mistreated by their captors who gave them only enough to keep them alive. They were sun-burned and de-hydrated and suffering from malnutrition. They went days without food at all, the whole time bein forced to keep up with the camels. They learned to eat the raw contents of a slaughtered camels belly to stay alive.
This is a true story and if you were here in person I could go into great detail tellin it to you, but since I don't hit the keys as fast as I tell stories, I'll have to cut to it.
The crew had been divided up and sold out to the highest bidders at some inter-tribal gathering. Some of the crew were lost forever to the desert, never to be seen again, but some remained together and 2 others where-abouts were known to the Capt. who retained his wits. Capt. Riley hatched a plan to befriend one of the Bedouin alphas. Riley promised him in scant hopes and outright lies, a ransom for the return for the lives of his men if he would deliver them to some British outpost to the north, in Morocco. There was some precedence for this, as white, shipwrecked sea-men had been ransomed out of the desert before.
After a few years as slaves of the desert raiders, and bein mistreated and abused the entire time, Rileys' plan came to fruition. I forget the exact number, but through sheer will and superior determination Riley delivered the survivors of his crew, with the help of the Bedouin alpha, who stood his ground on Rileys' bold words, through at least a couple 'a' uncertain moments, that held their lives in the balance, to The British ambassador in Morocco.(pardon the run-on there, if you would). I think about 6 of the original 13 survived.
The survivors were all traumatized by their experience. Upon arrival at the British office, the men were nearly dead. averaging about 100 lbs underweight, with all manner of terrible skin conditions, suffering terribly.
Eventually they were returned to America. Capt. Riley went on to write a book about his ordeal,and became famous, but the men he saved did not fare so well once home. They could not return to normal life. They had been through a door that could not be closed. They couldn't pretend they didn't know...
I have another story about 6 Irish rebels who escaped from a British prison in Australia, after 9 years of captivity, which they began serving in 1867. They were sprung by the Clan Na Gael, who hired a whaling ship for the job. It was a great escape, full of heart and courage, but when the men got home, they were unable to fall back in. The Capt of the ship did well, and the man who actually broke the kids out became a hero, but the ones who had been prisoners themselves became isolated and mostly died pre-maturely. They couldn't pretend they didn't know...and neither can we.
I think it's somethin like that...
God is in you.
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1. Admit to god, myself and others that I am powerless over drugs,
exept when and where to do so would injure myself or others.
2. Work to establish a conscious contact with god as I understand
him and seek to strengthen myself in all my daily affairs either
married or single.
3. Make direct amends to such persons whenever possible unless
otherwise directed by my attorney.
4. Make a searching and fearless Moral Inventory of myself daily
and keep it personal.
5. Strive to improve myself and my knowlege of drugs everyday
searching for better ways to redeem my stamps and help others.
6. Apologize to those I have trespassed against and surrender
nothing to those who have trespassed against me.
7. Having recieved the gift of Obediance, I will practice these principles in all my daily affairs, and hold the door open for those I can help.
:rofl: :o :lol: 8-) :smokin::
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And yet as far back as the history of the world goes, there are stories of people who have been tortured and mistreated, held captive. You name it and it's been done at some point in time all over the world. Men, women, children, no one escaped these horrible experiences.
But not all of the people who had these horrific events happen to them were unable to return to their previous lives, or the world they once knew. Many went on to have a life that celebrated their survival, filled with the knowledge that that had been stronger than those that abused them.
What makes one person never able to fully recover from their experience an another somehow able to move through it and continue on in a life that has love and happiness?
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What makes one person never able to fully recover from their experience an another somehow able to move through it and continue on in a life that has love and happiness?
Drugs...lots and lots of drugs...
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Let's have a freaking song........
I am straight hear me roar as I'm running for the door and the 5th phasers spread me across the land.........
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And yet as far back as the history of the world goes, there are stories of people who have been tortured and mistreated, held captive. You name it and it's been done at some point in time all over the world. Men, women, children, no one escaped these horrible experiences.
But not all of the people who had these horrific events happen to them were unable to return to their previous lives, or the world they once knew. Many went on to have a life that celebrated their survival, filled with the knowledge that that had been stronger than those that abused them.
What makes one person never able to fully recover from their experience an another somehow able to move through it and continue on in a life that has love and happiness?
Yes. Everyone is different. That is the basis of evolutionary theory. Right ?? People are stronger or weaker(who sometimes masquerade as each other) under the same conditions. The most subtle of variables can determine results. Survival of the fittest. Its a brutal world.
Love, yes. Happiness I don' recognize no more. And I mean that as in don't recognize it's authority over me. Happiness is irrelevant. The less I pursue happiness the better off and merrier for it, I be. :wink: ::hatter:: ::alieneyesa:: ::bandit:: :skull: ::dove::
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thanks 'starry' for the true survivor tales... you wrote 'they went through a door that cannot be closed'....so true.........
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And yet as far back as the history of the world goes, there are stories of people who have been tortured and mistreated, held captive. You name it and it's been done at some point in time all over the world. Men, women, children, no one escaped these horrible experiences.
But not all of the people who had these horrific events happen to them were unable to return to their previous lives, or the world they once knew. Many went on to have a life that celebrated their survival, filled with the knowledge that that had been stronger than those that abused them.
What makes one person never able to fully recover from their experience an another somehow able to move through it and continue on in a life that has love and happiness?
Yes. Everyone is different. That is the basis of evolutionary theory. Right ?? People are stronger or weaker(who sometimes masquerade as each other) under the same conditions. The most subtle of variables can determine results. Survival of the fittest. Its a brutal world.
Love, yes. Happiness I don' recognize no more. And I mean that as in don't recognize it's authority over me. Happiness is irrelevant. The less I pursue happiness the better off and merrier for it, I be. :wink: ::hatter:: ::alieneyesa:: ::bandit:: :skull: ::dove::
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Yes, Flygirl it is irrelevant to me.
What I mean to say, is that I used to worry quite a bit about my happiness, you know, always comparing myself to some highly desired, abstracted, ideal state of happiness. I was miserable and unhappy due to my desire for it. One day, over 10 years ago now, I realized happiness had trapped me in a perpetual state of misery. I completely and utterly dropped the word from my vocabulary, as I had also done with the word "hate". The result is that I live my life without questioning whether I am happy or not, and I am not bein devoured by hatred from the inside out. I just don't really think about it anymore and really I am so much the happier for it. Happiness should not be persued for it's own sake, and I know I disagree with the Dali Llama on that, but oh well, from my own experience happiness is the result of taking responsibility and livin well. Naturally then, if you are concerned with your happiness, as some state of being, which you must attain for it's own sake, then you are most likely unhappy.
And Ohhhh, girl, ... with words they try ta jail ya!
Always nice to read you flygirl. Be well.