Fornits
Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform => Elan School => Topic started by: Anonymous on August 20, 2005, 10:43:00 PM
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I have a syn model #B-25 elan-bot and had purchased it becuase it came highly recomended for liquor store stock bot work.
I do own a liquor store, actaully several, and I bought the elan -bot Syn model #B-25 and it is not doing its job.
It slacks off way too much and also keeps masterbating to national geographic images, "like african woman in tribes that have plates in their mouths" What should I do?
It also likes to spend too much time at the fornits board lying about its job position saying that it is a wine store owner.
I have made the syn-elanbot knock everytime I catch it slacking off but it does little or nothing to correct its behavior. Any thoughts?
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Give it a twinkie and a swift kick.that works on my Lettissue
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My Syn bot also keeps saying stupid things like "Bwahhhhhhhh" and uses the word "Dink" in every sentence.
I am really thinking about trading this bot in for a Cruzbot model.
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Here is a typed manuscript of what my Synbot keeps saying.
Bwahhhhhhhh, Bwahhhhhhhhh, Bwahhhhhhhhh by the by, bwahhhhhhhhh dink, by the by by the by,bwahhhhhh bwahhhhhhhhh.
Everytime I hear it say "bwahhhhhhhhhhh" I think it is trying to be a sheep or something like it.
Could it be possible, that it is trying to tell me that it wants to go back to its creator Martin Krulgik so it can have sex with Maines wildlife?
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BITCH BITCH BITCH SIKE!
Letissue-bot out.
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Elan Robot Technical Manual: Models B-20, B-25, & B-50. By Senior Mechanic Peter M. Rowe:
"Having your B-20, B-25, or B-50 (SyN-Bot) model knock on a door is a very effective tool in maintaining your syn-bot. Syn-bots, from the time they were an expeditor, were trained to work as lower level store clerks in liquor stores, gay pornography shops, Wal-Marts, and fast food chains. The masturbation issue you've described should not create any long lasting problems, only minor annoyances during functioning; as syn-bots were equipped only with ovaries (model: B-20), a complete lack of a penis (model: B-25) or a lack of any genitalia whatsover (model B-25B,C, & B-50). However, daily verbal reprimands can cut down on this behavior."
"While your syn-bots claims of grandeur (in your case; wine store owner) can be quite shocking to anyone who knows the truth, please remember: elan-bots require fantasy realities to make themselves feel superior, and also to continue living. Do not worry, your syn-bot will not kill you in your sleep and take over your store or place of business. The elan-diploma guarantees both a third grade level education, and no upward mobility in the workforce."
"THe IMR and the Poland Maine Robot Factory would not recommend trading in your SyN-bot (B-20, B-25, B-50) for a Cruz-bot (A-101, A-102). The latter model will not be able either to hold a job or follow orders without constant supervision and higher maintenance cost. IF still under warrany, your syn-bot may be brought back ot the IMR free of charge and inspected by Chief Mechanic Chief Martin R. Kruglick. CM Martin will fill your synbot with the proper lubricant, and re-insert the ramrod into your robot, which should clear up some of the latter rpoblems you've mentioned."
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On 2005-08-21 11:00:00, Mister Pink wrote:
"Elan Robot Technical Manual: Models B-20, B-25, & B-50. By Senior Mechanic Peter M. Rowe:
"Having your B-20, B-25, or B-50 (SyN-Bot) model knock on a door is a very effective tool in maintaining your syn-bot. Syn-bots, from the time they were an expeditor, were trained to work as lower level store clerks in liquor stores, gay pornography shops, Wal-Marts, and fast food chains. The masturbation issue you've described should not create any long lasting problems, only minor annoyances during functioning; as syn-bots were equipped only with ovaries (model: B-20), a complete lack of a penis (model: B-25) or a lack of any genitalia whatsover (model B-25B,C, & B-50). However, daily verbal reprimands can cut down on this behavior."
"While your syn-bots claims of grandeur (in your case; wine store owner) can be quite shocking to anyone who knows the truth, please remember: elan-bots require fantasy realities to make themselves feel superior, and also to continue living. Do not worry, your syn-bot will not kill you in your sleep and take over your store or place of business. The elan-diploma guarantees both a third grade level education, and no upward mobility in the workforce."
"THe IMR and the Poland Maine Robot Factory would not recommend trading in your SyN-bot (B-20, B-25, B-50) for a Cruz-bot (A-101, A-102). The latter model will not be able either to hold a job or follow orders without constant supervision and higher maintenance cost. IF still under warrany, your syn-bot may be brought back ot the IMR free of charge and inspected by Chief Mechanic Chief Martin R. Kruglick. CM Martin will fill your synbot with the proper lubricant, and re-insert the ramrod into your robot, which should clear up some of the latter rpoblems you've mentioned."
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:rofl: :rofl:
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My question was still not answered. My synbot keeps saying bwahhhhhhhh and dink and by thr by consistantly, will it ever shut the fuck up?
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Man, these Elanbot stories are hysterical!
:nworthy: :nworthy: :nworthy: :nworthy:
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I figured I'd report this, as some questions concerning the SyN-bot have recently come up.