Fornits
Treatment Abuse, Behavior Modification, Thought Reform => The Troubled Teen Industry => Topic started by: OverLordd on July 29, 2005, 08:46:00 PM
-
Stuggling Teens have been hit by a hacker, thanks to some people I know within the company I have garnnered that indeed the site is down, and will be down for a while, and the hacker took down the entire local server in the area. Any one know what happened here? Could Struggling Teens be the target? Is it just a stroke of luck, good or bad depending on your view, that this has happened?
-
No problem- we'll just come over and troll on your board like you do on ours.
-
::smirks:: at least be a man, or a woman, and sign your posts.
-
Who gives a shit what those stupid fucks do over at their site.
-
Fat chance that they'll sign their post. They aren't going to risk public humiliation, but feel quite justified in subjecting their offspring to it.
-
Owch, thats got to sting, haha. Your most likely right.
-
http://strugglingteens.org/ (http://strugglingteens.org/)
it is up!
-
Notice how many parents are in "therapy" themselves, to get over controlling their kid's lives while they were in a program or RTC?
EMPTY PROGRAM SYNDROME?
OMG .. I think I'm gonna be sick.
http://www.strugglingteens.com/cgi-bin/ ... 001066;p=2 (http://www.strugglingteens.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=12;t=001066;p=2)
-
This thread on post-treatment kids is excellent, and I thank Mose for starting it. Some of their common features stand out, don't they! Their emotional immaturity, despite their apparent sophistication. Their refusal to be therapized. The way they seem to cling to the role of child in relation to us their parents, despite the very adult experiences many of them have had. Their difficulties with making decisions and forming realistic plans and following through.
Our only useful responses seem to be patience, living our values, not allowing ourselves to be used or manipulated, providing advice when asked and as non-judgmentally as we can, and continuing to love them unconditionally.
It's been three sober years since our daughter (20) went to wilderness (and then RTC and then a transition house during her freshman year of college). She has accomplished many good things, but she still struggles with decisions. If I take the long view, I can certainly see progress, if bumpy. Her self-awareness and insight into her difficulties are very great ("If I live at home, I'll be selfish and immature!"). Even though she doesn't always use her insight to help herself right away, she usually eventually does.
Things may always be harder for her than for other young people, but I try to have faith that she's stronger than most, too. She won't do college in the standard 4-year way, but lots of successful people don't. E.g., Bill Gates, Steven Jobs.
Be steadfast, all!
It's sad to read posts like this. Just very sad. THere should be a support group for the children of struggling teens parents- they need help, help getting the fuck away from their insane parents.
-
FRom what I read it sounds like most of these parents are push-overs and lack a strong father figure in the family. THey refuse to be real with their kids, and never have been. WHen they get to 16, 17 they start complaining they can't take it anymore and send them off until they are 18.
Is it just me or does it seem like very few fathers are on these boards talking about frustrated they are with their teen. Whats up with that?
-
There are actually quite a few fathers who post on strugglingteens.com. Do a search on old posts by Kerry- and currently there is Dadrod and a few others.
I wish you could realize how ignorant and immature you sound. What was wrong with the post quoted below? These are caring parents whose kids have, in many cases, turned a corner. You are SO unwilling to admit that there are excellent programs out there. Hey-sorry you are still so screwed up and that the right choices weren't made for you, but get a life and get off your whining crusade against parents who actually found programs that helped their kids.
-
On 2005-07-30 08:28:00, Anonymous wrote:
"There are actually quite a few fathers who post on strugglingteens.com. Do a search on old posts by Kerry- and currently there is Dadrod and a few others.
I wish you could realize how ignorant and immature you sound. What was wrong with the post quoted below? These are caring parents whose kids have, in many cases, turned a corner. You are SO unwilling to admit that there are excellent programs out there. Hey-sorry you are still so screwed up and that the right choices weren't made for you, but get a life and get off your whining crusade against parents who actually found programs that helped their kids."
Have you actually read that post that was quoted?
It states, basically, that kids who have been through a program have many difficulties in making decisions on their own. It states that they had so much "therapy" and "help", they just can't take it any more. It states that after being forced into the child role for so long (by being controlled constantly, and not being allowed any sort of indepedence), they don't really know how to be anything else.
And you call that "love"? Putting your child in a program is not "love" and it's not "help". It's "I'm tired of parenting, so I'm going to pay someone else to do it for me; and I'm angry at you for growing up, so I'm going to pay someone to force you into the child role again".
It's sad that you feel the need to hurt your child this badly. I hope s/he will be able to overcome it eventually.
-
On 2005-07-30 08:28:00, Anonymous wrote:
"There are actually quite a few fathers who post on strugglingteens.com. Do a search on old posts by Kerry- and currently there is Dadrod and a few others.
I wish you could realize how ignorant and immature you sound. What was wrong with the post quoted below? These are caring parents whose kids have, in many cases, turned a corner. You are SO unwilling to admit that there are excellent programs out there. Hey-sorry you are still so screwed up and that the right choices weren't made for you, but get a life and get off your whining crusade against parents who actually found programs that helped their kids."
:scared: Oh no!! Not criticism from a program parent! What ever shall I do?!?!
I hope you realize NOBODY here gives one flying fuck what you have to say. We already KNOW you send your children off to get abused. Take your excuses elsewhere, maybe to struggling teens- I'm sure they will welcome you will open arms!
Enjoy what's left of your fucked up family life. Congrats on fucking up your child. You suck as a parent, but I'm sure you have realized that already. Why else would you be over here taking out anger on anonymous internet personalities?
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
PLEASE post again. You crack us up and entertain at the same time.
-
Here is another one.. god, I can't believe some of these parents ignorance..
goldenguru
Member
Member # 4289
Well I was confronted with my "controlling self" yesterday. I realized I was not detaching.
My daughter packed on about 20 pounds at her TBS. She hates the extra weight. She had started eating healthier and exercising. So yesterday she decides she wants to run through a drive through and super size it. I began nagging her and reminding her of her decision to take off some weight, yada, yada, yada. I could see she was getting very irritated with me. [Mad] I apologized for my behavior and reassured her that this is her decision alone, and that I would butt out. It felt so good to me (and her) to recognize the need to detach.
So she skipped the fast food and came home and made a chicken salad instead. She chose.... not me. [Big Grin]
Hopefully next time I catch myself before I open my big mouth. [Wink]
--------------------
Kelly
Sounds to me like these parents just have to deal with the same problems when their teens return.
I hope they feel good about spending so much money. Where to you find the dumbest parents? Struggling teens! :lol:
If I was greedy and evil like these folks, I would start a program too, it's just sooooooo easy taking money from these people.
-
I wanna start a program where all they do is sit around playing games, eating junk food, and watching MTV on beanbag chairs. I could make a fucking AWESOME crib for them to hang out in given the usual tuition payments :grin:
So, just truck them to regular schools during the day (or bus, or take a fucking fleet of hummers/limos) and get some therapists under my wing , etc... fuck, Id still have enough over to be RICH or bankroll any sort of industry shakedown I want. Oh, and Id donate tax-deductable donations to ISAC - better than Uncle Sam getting the money :lol:
Any Irishman who doubts the reality of selective enforcement ought to take just a moment to comtemplate the etymology of the term "paddy waggon".
--Antigen
-
I'm new here - how can you tell the parent anonymous from the kid anonymous? How do you know who you're arguing with?
-
YOU DON'T!!!!
-
On 2005-07-30 08:49:00, Anonymous wrote:
"Here is another one.. god, I can't believe some of these parents ignorance..
goldenguru
Member
Member # 4289
Well I was confronted with my "controlling self" yesterday. I realized I was not detaching.
My daughter packed on about 20 pounds at her TBS. She hates the extra weight. She had started eating healthier and exercising. So yesterday she decides she wants to run through a drive through and super size it. I began nagging her and reminding her of her decision to take off some weight, yada, yada, yada. I could see she was getting very irritated with me. [Mad] I apologized for my behavior and reassured her that this is her decision alone, and that I would butt out. It felt so good to me (and her) to recognize the need to detach.
So she skipped the fast food and came home and made a chicken salad instead. She chose.... not me. [Big Grin]
Hopefully next time I catch myself before I open my big mouth. [Wink]
--------------------
Kelly
Sounds to me like these parents just have to deal with the same problems when their teens return.
I hope they feel good about spending so much money. Where to you find the dumbest parents? Struggling teens! :lol:
If I was greedy and evil like these folks, I would start a program too, it's just sooooooo easy taking money from these people. "
GOLDEN GURU? Hell the name says it all.
These so-called parents are on such a power trip. Cracks me up how they need "therapy" after their kid gets out ... and suddenly ... they can't micro manage their every thought and action.
SICKOS!
-
Actually, most of the parents on the strugglingteens board are well-educated, bright and care deeply about their kids. Many of the kids who have gone to programs have come home and been very successful. Check out KareninDallas' posts- her son is a super-star student and athlete. He hated his program, but figured out that his parents did the right thing. He maneuvered his way out early and never looked back. Do you call that scarred for life? There are many similar stories- FS, MrsDVA, PeteandBarb- the families have been through hell and have come out stronger.
It isn't the parents on that board who have all the anger- it is you mindless little shits who post over here.
-
On 2005-07-30 12:48:00, Anonymous wrote:
"Actually, most of the parents on the strugglingteens board are well-educated, bright and care deeply about their kids. Many of the kids who have gone to programs have come home and been very successful. Check out KareninDallas' posts- her son is a super-star student and athlete. He hated his program, but figured out that his parents did the right thing. He maneuvered his way out early and never looked back. Do you call that scarred for life? There are many similar stories- FS, MrsDVA, PeteandBarb- the families have been through hell and have come out stronger.
It isn't the parents on that board who have all the anger- it is you mindless little shits who post over here."
The parents at strugglingteens are control freaks. Sure, they may love their kids, but that love in superceded by an incredible need to keep their teen a baby. So they put the teen is a place where he/she is not allowed to be anything but a baby. A place where he/she is forced to ask permission to speak, stand, eat, speak. A place where he/she is not allowed to make any decisions, at all.
Yes, there are kids who manage to make it through despite their parents' poot judgement and terrible choices. Unfortuantely, not all kids are that resilient.
-
On 2005-07-30 12:48:00, Anonymous wrote:
"Actually, most of the parents on the strugglingteens board are well-educated, bright and care deeply about their kids. Many of the kids who have gone to programs have come home and been very successful. Check out KareninDallas' posts- her son is a super-star student and athlete. He hated his program, but figured out that his parents did the right thing. He maneuvered his way out early and never looked back. Do you call that scarred for life? There are many similar stories- FS, MrsDVA, PeteandBarb- the families have been through hell and have come out stronger.
It isn't the parents on that board who have all the anger- it is you mindless little shits who post over here."
Well .. you see ... it's ALL in the koolaid shoved down the throats of you gullible, control freak program parents.
Fornits is KOOLAID free.
Stick around .. you just might learn a thing or two about parenting without a PROGRAM MANUAL to tell you what to do (and where to send your check).
:rofl:
:rofl:
-
On 2005-07-30 12:48:00, Anonymous wrote:
"Actually, most of the parents on the strugglingteens board are well-educated, bright and care deeply about their kids. Many of the kids who have gone to programs have come home and been very successful. Check out KareninDallas' posts- her son is a super-star student and athlete. He hated his program, but figured out that his parents did the right thing. He maneuvered his way out early and never looked back. Do you call that scarred for life? There are many similar stories- FS, MrsDVA, PeteandBarb- the families have been through hell and have come out stronger.
It isn't the parents on that board who have all the anger- it is you mindless little shits who post over here."
This is why we love you guys so much from struggling teens. You make this all SO much fun! :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :lol: :lol: :lol:
-
goldenguru
Member
Member # 4289
As you know, our daughter has been home for about 4 weeks. Things have gone remarkably well. Until last night.
She came into our bedroom around midnight. She was sobbing. Near hysterics. Once she calmed enough to make a coherent sentence I learned that she had stumbled upon a file that I have in my desk. It contains medical records from psychiatrists, therapists, inpatient stays, etc. She read through everything.
To the best of my understanding, this caused a sort of a flashback for her. She said she did not realize the extent of her dysfunction at the time. She also said that "I'm psycho. I have never been normal".
She was finally able to calm herself. I could see her using tools (such as checking her negative thinking processes) and she was able to cope without resorting to old unhealthy patterns of coping.
In addition, I thought it was good that she came to us for support. Before she would just internalize and not reach out for support.
So, my question is this. Did your kids ever come to a place where they sort of flashed back/freaked out over their pasts? Is this a necessary step to moving forward? Any similar experiences? Thanks in advance for reading to the end of my rather lengthy post.
--------------------
Kelly
-
On 2005-07-30 16:30:00, Anonymous wrote:
"goldenguru
Member
Member # 4289
As you know, our daughter has been home for about 4 weeks. Things have gone remarkably well. Until last night.
She came into our bedroom around midnight. She was sobbing. Near hysterics. Once she calmed enough to make a coherent sentence I learned that she had stumbled upon a file that I have in my desk. It contains medical records from psychiatrists, therapists, inpatient stays, etc. She read through everything.
To the best of my understanding, this caused a sort of a flashback for her. She said she did not realize the extent of her dysfunction at the time. She also said that "I'm psycho. I have never been normal".
She was finally able to calm herself. I could see her using tools (such as checking her negative thinking processes) and she was able to cope without resorting to old unhealthy patterns of coping.
In addition, I thought it was good that she came to us for support. Before she would just internalize and not reach out for support.
So, my question is this. Did your kids ever come to a place where they sort of flashed back/freaked out over their pasts? Is this a necessary step to moving forward? Any similar experiences? Thanks in advance for reading to the end of my rather lengthy post.
--------------------
Kelly
"
What a bitch. Instead of comforting her kid and helping her focus on real life instead of all the "help" and "therapy" and "behavioral patterns" bullshit, she runs right back to the arms of the psycho-babble so common in the teen abuse industry.
How does this lady expect her daughter to not feel like a psycho, after being forced to go throguh so many "helpful" therapists, programs, etc.?
-
she was never normal because she never had normal parents. People in the real world don't use words like "internalize" or "checking her negative thinking processes." Maybe these parents should try to be a little bit more human with their kids.
-
On 2005-07-30 17:17:00, Anonymous wrote:
"she was never normal because she never had normal parents. People in the real world don't use words like "internalize" or "checking her negative thinking processes." Maybe these parents should try to be a little bit more human with their kids."
Agreed.
-
On 2005-07-30 12:55:00, Anonymous wrote:
The parents at strugglingteens are control freaks. Sure, they may love their kids, but that love in superceded by an incredible need to keep their teen a baby. So they put the teen is a place where he/she is not allowed to be anything but a baby. A place where he/she is forced to ask permission to speak, stand, eat, speak. A place where he/she is not allowed to make any decisions, at all.
Why is that, ya' think? I've been brooding on this now for a number of years; since my oldest turned... about 14, so 7 years or so now. Of course, I thought it was just me. I always think it's just me. Eventually, after much fighting and many words and deeds I wish I could take back, I finally settled on a policy of just being up front about things.
I don't know what they should do, how they should act or to what, exactly, they should aspire. My life when I was their age was spent in the Twilight Zone. So, when they ask (or, sometimes, when they don't but I think I have a really good idea) I'll tell them what I think, but w/ the standard disclaimer that I can't be sure; that they should take my opinion into consideration and do what they think is best.* That seems to work better than anything I've tried before.
But I'm starting to think that this entire generation, and likely the one or two before, are just as lost and uncertain as I've ever felt; maybe moreso. We don't have role models in our lives of good, successful 15 - 20 year olds. There isn't any sock model of The Right Way® to be a young adult.
*Of course, I'm talking about the vast array of issues that I can't be completely sure about. The ones I am sure of, I have no prblem just telling them what I know. If you think I'm a pushover, just ask my kids. We have very few big fights anymore. When I do decide to put my foot down, they know it's a lost cause to try and move me. I just try to not overplay that mighty awsome mom-fu card.
The inspiration of the Bible depends on the ignorance of the person who reads it.
--Robert G. Ingersoll, American politician and lecturer
-
Aww fuck, some anon just had to go posting their comments on here, God damn it, I'm going to take so much heat for that. People!! there are some of us fighting on this site for our thoughts and arguments. So please sweet christ, dont post their posts on here, they tend to get pissy and attack me.
-
YOU ARE THE ONE WHO STARTED THE BACK AND FORTH! LOL
-
On 2005-07-30 19:20:00, OverLordd wrote:
"Aww fuck, some anon just had to go posting their comments on here, God damn it, I'm going to take so much heat for that. People!! there are some of us fighting on this site for our thoughts and arguments. So please sweet christ, dont post their posts on here, they tend to get pissy and attack me."
What are you talking about OL? Why should you have to "fight" to express an opinion on a discussion board? Oh yeah ... ST stands for Stepford Times.
Sorry ... carry on!
:scared: :scared: :scared: :scared: :scared:
-
I know im the one that started it, but I dont need other people causing me to be attacked!!! And why do I need to fight? because its the right thing to do? and getting on that board and disagreeing is sure to start a fight.
-
And why should I give a shit what you are doing?
Seriously.
Your trolling is not a team game.
-
katfish
Junior Member
Member # 1271
this site has a wealth of information that may be useful to anyone looking into programs. there are some great programs out there, but there are also some pretty nasty ones. This site gives you the alumni and former/current staff experience
[This post has been edited to remove a link to a website that promotes anonymous posting and parent/ program bashing without accountability.]
[ July 28, 2005, 01:34 PM: Message edited by: kristiesprout ] Posts: 8 | From: NYC, NY, USA | Registered: Dec 2000
HUH WONDER WHAT SITE'S LINK GOT DELETED?
LOL
-
On 2005-07-30 20:15:00, OverLordd wrote:
"I know im the one that started it, but I dont need other people causing me to be attacked!!! And why do I need to fight? because its the right thing to do? and getting on that board and disagreeing is sure to start a fight."
What's there to fight about?
Locking up kids and robbing them of their innocence (youth) is just plain evil.
Why get into a pissing contest and/or suck it up if you don't have to?
You are on the right side of the issue.
Tell those nice, sweet phony-ass parents to take a hike.
:smokin:
-
hehe, well I think the princple is what there is to fight about, you know the web site supports the very idea of sending your kid away, I think thats something to fight over you know. I have told them to take a hike repatedly hehe.