however, for cooltherapy, in trusting that what you say about your life is true, i have to ask you why you are doing this? i say this respectfully now. i made the mistake of grouping all of you as whining brats. however, if you are truelly self-made as you have explained why would you waste your time pursuing carlbrook in some legal contest? there is so many things more important to do then live in resent of that which is unimportant. i was vile before, now i say with respect, carlbrook had some mistakes, but only threw the actions of individuals. your ultrasound situation could of happened at any school. but it should cost the job of the supervisor, not the entire school. theraputic boarding schools, in my opinion were set-up to babysit because the child could not be controlled by the parent. and they do their job well. if you take out the tbs then there is no median between freedom and prison (in short). now some people in this forum have personally attacked tim brace. i would trust him with my life. that is why i know the posts are delusional. so i ask again, if the freedom to talk to your parents was so imperative, why did your parents admit you? everything was cut and dry prior to admission. why would you spend your time and energy to pursue this any further?
Bryan,
I do this because of the nights I've spent awake worrying about it. Some of my friends think it's a little absurd, others completely behind me. It's irrelevant to me how people feel about it. I had nightmares pretty regularly for 5 years after I graduated. It took 6 different counselors before I found the guy who ultimately saved me from those dreams. I haven't had a nightmare in 6 months (when he said I was ready to move on and didn't need to see him anymore). Why did it take so much effort and so many years to get through that? PTSD.
What really keeps me up at night... and the reason that I put forth the energy now... is the thought of kids who are there right now. No, not everyone will have the same response that I did. Not everyone is quite so sensitive. But for the few who are... (those who feel trapped and spend 16+ months biting their tongue when they felt things were unfair only to leave the school feeling hollow, censored, and weak) ...I'm going to say my piece.
I felt WEAK after I left. I arrived at Carlbrook VERY extroverted, outgoing, wild... I dabbled in drugs, skipped a lot of school, and ignored my parents' requests. I needed to be pushed in an alternate direction - but not at the cost of losing my identity. I started college right after leaving Carlbrook and felt isolated from my peers. I was shy, very quiet, and thus, made no friends. I dated a series of men who took advantage of my weakness. This furthered my negative self-image.
It is taking time but I am finally able to interact with large groups of people. I have a very nice group of friends... many don't know anything about my life before graduate school. It's difficult to talk about... and, frankly, everyone has an opinion and thinks they can fix me. It makes it worse. Not many people go through the bizarre things that we did. And regardless of whether you believe that they were abusive or fair... that shit was fucking strange. Have you watched Jesus Camp? It made me sick.
So that's why I take time out of my severely busy schedule to make a point to hold this school accountable. Regardless of whether we had close relationships with the staff members, there is so much behind the scenes that, as students, we were unaware of.
And this is where I hop on my soapbox.. Forgive me if you know this... but I've learned this through years of research and chatting with various CBK teachers, ex-teachers, staff, ex-staff, graduates, graduates of other programs...etc.........
Tim Brace? Yeah... What he doesn't mention to us in Monday Assembly is that he's been involved in AT LEAST 5 schools that have been shut down by various state governments. He is not alone. Many of the board members' names pop up affiliated with schools that have since been deemed abusive. You can say they were different? These staff members changed their practices to better fit into the standards of our modern day society? No. Read the workshop scripts. They. Are. Identical. Speak with the graduates of these other institutions, some of whom are now into their 40s. Same experience. Same staff. Same nightmares. Same fucking situation. Check out the CEDU documentaries on YouTube. You'll hear your beloved Tim Brace's name mentioned a few times in there. More importantly, chat with the people who created those videos... you'll hear even more when they're not on tape.
The school's caring nature? Nah. Call up Hope Bowling, Stephen Davidson, Mama Saunders.... they'll tell you how much the school cares about peoples' livelihoods. Teachers are fired with absolutely NO NOTICE and are often not given an explanation (not required by VA law). New staff members were hired on at 1/2 the pay. But, truth is, many of these (more recent) ex-teachers/ex-advisers won't say anything to you. This is because Carlbrook had them sign a waiver for 6 months severance to never speak about the school again. To receive these moneys (which many of them are desperate for because of the SHITTY economy in South Side Virginia) it is mandated that they do not speak to former students, former staff members, sometimes current staff members, or even ABOUT Carlbrook to unrelated parties.
If that isn't worrisome enough... why don't you give them a call and ask for your records? Not the application forms... the BINDER that they kept in the Carriage House that contained all of your therapeutics, health, etc. If you graduated before 2009, they will not have it for you. 2008 and earlier graduates' information was shredded by the staff when they first started to hear murmuring from former students. I could give you further details of this, but I am not sure if there are current employees who could be damaged by the information.
This isn't even getting into the workshops, groups, negative sculptures, stumps, suspension, etc.... and I won't go there tonight. Mostly because I think that it's a waste of time. Some people liked that stuff, others didn't. But the points mentioned above SHOULD worry you. They should make you think. They should make you question the people who you're holding so close to your heart.
And, as someone mentioned above, you can chose to continue to ignore this. That's fine with me. I'm not looking for allies. I'm not looking for someone to join my "crusade." I'm just looking for Carlbrook to be held accountable for once. It's time for them to write their own honor list. All of the board members and higher-up advising staff should be on permanent stumps. A handful should be in prison for fraud. The rest of them? They're lost in the romance of it all. And it's hard not to be. It's hard to evaluate yourself... hard to admit that you could be causing damage.
Anyway, signing off. Maybe this helps give you a clearer view of why I might feel so passionately about this. I know it certainly helped me to sit and write it.
