How Come?

[Maddie May]

How come in 11 1/2 months at Growing Together, everyday I had to admit that I was an acoholic and a drug addict?  How come I had only experimented with drugs before I got in and then when I got out I made a point to do every drug immaginable?  I even found a way to take pills in the program. How come I learned more about drugs in the program than I ever could have on my own. How come my parents thought they were helping and how come it just made things worse?  And how come now at the age of 26 I don't do drugs (because they don't agree with me anymore in my old age) and  how come I can drink whenever I want and not drink whenever I want.  So how come if I was an acoholic and a drug addict at the age of 16, how come I am not now?  Was I misdiagnosed?  How come we all figure what is right for ourselves over time anyway.

[Carmel]

Because Straight/GT was the lie, and we were the victims.  Thats how come.

Straight/GT was a money machine.  Straight/GT was what its founders thought was their portal to heaven (along the most "golden" of paths to be exact). Straight/GT had to keep us convinced that we were sick, so that our parents would pay for more treatment.  

It was the lowest, dirtiest form of decpetion to us and even to our parents in order to line pockets.  They made our parents an offer they couldnt refuse...they convinced them that we had lost our souls, and that Straight/GT could sell them back to us.  Who is going to say no to that?

I grow in fear of our government everyday.  It seems lately they have no limits to the corruption and deception.  We have a fanatic in office right now....Bush may as well have founded Straight himself.  

I saw a bumper sticker the other day that said "I love my country, but I fear my government".  Thats my sentiments exactly.

[GregFL]

it is more than that. The whole modality of the twelve step program, most popularized in AA, is in question here. Art Barker claimed the direct inspiration for the Seed was AA, but we all know there is more to it than that..
I personally know a kid whom went thru SAFE, had a horrible experience at age 14, had gotten drunk prior to going in several times, whom now is convinced he is an alcohlic and attends AA meetings.Talking with him he claims that due to family history and his drinking binge, he is definitely a alkie. My opinion differs.
a recent thread at the Seed site had ginger's grown brother claiming he is a drug addict, gambling addict, drug addict and that basically AA and the Seed saved his life. other's accounts of his addiction history vary tremendously.
This stuff stupidfys me.  I have spoken to SAFE grad's whom claim they are addicts, and when you probe you find that they smoked some pot, drank some beer, maybe tried coke once or twice, but now they are "recovered addicts."
Life is hard enough without saddling people with this addiction misdiagnosis. the truth is that most people can use alcohol, drugs, whatever and not become addicted. Some people get addicted to everything they do, including addiction treatment.
A true addict is a sad individual. Most of us were just normal kids whom did some unruly adolescent behavior, and BAM, into the program we went and our lives were changed forever.
The Seed routinely admitted kids for having a "druggie attitude", with little or no drug history
Todays programs admit them for having an "addictive personality",with little or no drug history.

Same lie, different generation.

[Maddie May]

In GT, there was a girl who had never done drugs, drank a sip of alcohol, smoked a cigarette or anything.  She just refused to go to school because the kids teased her.  I think she had been in there for over a year when I first started the program.  She had to say that she was a drug addict and an acoholic.  One therapist told me once that the only thing I suffered from was poor impulse control.  To me that sums it up for most teenagers.

[Carmel]

I remember, the day after all of the kids arrived from the California program, it was our first rap together as a group and Staff decided to make it a "Past Rap".  I was the very first person who got called on and I stood up and talked about his time that I did acid and ran away from home.  It was really one of my more painful memories because some really terrible things happened to me while I was gone....anyway, much to my surprise even, I broke down in tears from the bottom of my heart.....I had probably never showed feelings to that degree in a past relating rap during my whole program....I think part of the big change from all the new people and everything was really stressful too and it all sort of poured out in my past incident.....

Immediately after I stopped talking a 5th phaser girl from California stood up and confronted me like nobody's business about how she was disgusted with me for not showing "enough feeling" and that I should think about my level of honesty in relating before I stood up again in group.  After she sat down the entire room was silent, I dont think anyone had seen someone get ripped in a friggin Past Rap ever.  Even Staff didnt say anything and no one even raised their hands to say anything else to me.  Finally the Executive Staff guy from LA just told me to sit down and they moved on to the next person.  That was the beginning of the end  for me I think.  That girl got started over the next week for being the most full of shit 5th phaser anyone had ever seen. I ran from the program for the final time about a month later.

[hedwigfan]

My parents turned in my diary, which was chock full of details about my sex life/teen angst/innermost thoughts and desires. I remember thinking I was doing pretty well on 1st phase. Then, during one of the raps, a staff member, who I really kind of liked (Susan McNitt), came walking up to the chairs with my diary. She stood me up, read various passages out loud (which was EXCRUCIATINGLY humiliating), and then, everyone got to take turns calling me a whore/slut/druggie/whatever. In a matter of minutes, my personal struggles were cheapened, and I don't remember ever feeling that shitty. What I want to know is, who convinced our parents to turn in diaries and things like that? And, did our parents have any idea that these items would be used to torture our souls and strip away our personalities?

[Anonymous]

Our parents were as easily convinced to turn over stashes such as your diary as they were to place us in the program in the first place.  

A huge mind trip under the guise of the slogan "The end justifies the means".

Moreover, as staff, we used to pass time reading through such things over a coke and a bag of chips to use as a tool to get phasers "honest" in group.  I am as resentful/regretful for that today as you towards staff members for doing such things.

Fucking program.

[dreammagician]

Straight took all my killer rock albums, beer can collection and any druggy memoribilia. Oh well, what do you expect from a wacky organization?

[ladyjerrico]

Sigh, I had a dream last night about Straight, first one I had in a while. I dreampt I was at this girls house in Lansing (I won't mention her name because well, she didn't really have a clean home) anyway, I was sleeping there and she tried to get me to listen to the radio and watch TV.
I told her I couldn't because I'm still on 1st phase and she said "oh yeah, that's right". I drempt her parents and a few oldcomers were watching TV so I snuck in that room somehow and saw a glimpse of it. I don't remember what was on, but I could see an image of something and heard the TV on.
My bed was next to a telephone that was active and plugged in, I wanted to call my fiance so bad on that phone, but I forgot his phone number.
When I was about ready to fall asleep I could see that there was no roof in the house and I could see the stars in the sky, but they were making odd formations and looked like neon laser lights and kept moving around. I pointed that out to someone in my dream and nobody else saw it but me, they thought it was a relapse from my drug usage and told me to not look at it.
Well, after waking up in my dream I found fruit flies scattered everywhere and they were dead, they were all over me and the whole house.
What the hell does this mean? and I'm NOT on crack! lol