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Author Topic: You know what's awesome?  (Read 1598 times)

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Offline Anonymous

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You know what's awesome?
« on: January 20, 2004, 12:35:00 PM »
I've got the day off work. Not the best job in the world, but an okay job, and I get to be completely myself which is amazing and lets me feel rich.

I rolled out of bed just an hour ago (10:00am) and now I'm sitting drinking my coffee doing email, visiting forums, all that stufr. I'm in a silky Victoria's Secret thing and wrapped up in a Martha Stewart fleece couch throw. I couldn't be more comfortable.

When I'm done posting this I'll sit and meditate for awhile in front of my fire place. Then I'll have a cigar beccause I do that every now and then. Then I'll step into the shower where I'll be for about 15 minutes using every damn mositurizer, conditioner, recunstructor known to man, and when I get out I'll spend a good half hour putting on make up.

When I'm all dressed and my hair is styled I'll get in my car and drive to a Starbucks with my little laptop here and I'll write, because that's what I enjoy doing and wasn't allowed to do when I was locked up. I used to sit and think about all of the books I could have written during the time wasted blasting people, or cleaning the building, or being blasted.

It's hard to keep the feeling we first had when let free, when having the freedom to be in teh shower longer than 2 minutes was the most liberating thing in the world. But I just wanted to take some time out today and acknowledge how really every day that we're out of these programs our dreams have come true.
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Offline Anonymous

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You know what's awesome?
« Reply #1 on: January 22, 2004, 01:18:00 PM »
The visual you just gave me of you in a Victoria's Secret thing wrapped in fleece smoking a cigar.  Just kidding in a perverted way.

You are right, freedom IS awesome and never to be taken forgranted.  I'll toast (a venti carmel macchiato with an extra espresso shot) to that. ::cheers::
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Offline Anonymous

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You know what's awesome?
« Reply #2 on: January 27, 2004, 11:38:00 PM »
*lol* Well it wasn't intended to be sexy but... Yeah I am kinda sexy and it's awesome that I have that freedom too : )

 ::cheers:: I'll toast a grande no whip mocha with skim milk to that.
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Offline Anonymous

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You know what's awesome?
« Reply #3 on: January 28, 2004, 12:15:00 AM »
I like your post, too.  Poetry in motion!  But I'm curious, how long have you been out of the program and what kind of relationship do you have with your family?
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Offline John Olsakovsky

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You know what's awesome?
« Reply #4 on: January 28, 2004, 09:39:00 AM »
I get that feeling back every time Ihave to take a roadtrip for work, which is often.
I'm also fortunate to live in Northern California and my road trips take me on some gorgeous drives to Lake Tahoe, Monterey, Napa Valley, up the coast to Humboldt County, and so on.  
We're not talking the 20 minute jaunts to Starbucks or the grocery store.  theser are a couple hours of solitude, my thoughts and some of the most breathtaking scenery this state has to offer.  

I relax, listen to tunes, sometimes smoke a joint and wonder at everything around me, taking in the wonderment that is this planet we live on.

I actually get to look out the window on the car ride.  :smile:
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Offline KIDSofEP

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You know what's awesome?
« Reply #5 on: January 28, 2004, 12:41:00 PM »
John O said "and I get to look out the window on the car ride".

I thought I might add: AND smoke a joint!
 :smokin:
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Offline Anonymous

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You know what's awesome?
« Reply #6 on: January 28, 2004, 01:06:00 PM »
Go John, Go John
your living the life !!!
Good for you

It makes me smile  :grin:
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Offline ottkat

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You know what's awesome?
« Reply #7 on: January 28, 2004, 03:47:00 PM »
Quote
On 2004-01-28 09:41:00, KIDSofEP wrote:

"John O said "and I get to look out the window on the car ride".

I thought I might add: AND smoke a joint!"


Jeez.  I smoked for the first time in 4 or 5 years over this last weekend, and it took me two days to feel right again.  

Not again for a while, sez I.  I am sticking to nice wine with the wife and my Sapphire-n-tonics (two limes, please); at least if I overdo it I recover by the next afternoon.

But guess what?  Freedom is getting to make dumb mistakes and pay for them, too!

Kathy
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Offline Anonymous

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You know what's awesome?
« Reply #8 on: January 28, 2004, 07:29:00 PM »
Me again. I've been out of the program for 10 years and I have no relationship with my parents. My father calls me on Christmas and my birthday and seems to feel very guilty but won't talk about it. My mother and I have contact but she is extremely mentally ill. Before her illness progressed she defended the program and abided by their way of life. Now that her delusional thinking is taking over she doesn't acknowledge that it ever happened and I sometimes wonder if she knows any more that it actually did. My siblings and I talk about it a bit but they seem to find it more painful than I do and they don't want to deal with it.

But in all honesty we didn't have much of a relationship before the program, so it didn't hurt our relationships, just individually tore us apart.
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