Memories brought to surface

[Anonymous]

Greetings, I was put in The Seed at the ripe old age of 13 by my desparate parents.  I'm sure after talking with reps from The Seed, they were convinced that I would end up- how did they used to drill into our heads time and time again - on the street, dead or in jail.  Now that I'm a parent of 2 teenage girls that have put me and their father through every test under the sun (well almost), I believe I was probally going to have the bad attitude, smart mouth, and yes, experiment with drugs and alcohol, but that ultimately I would come out on the other end OK.  But, of course I'll never know because from 1972 - 1977 off and on were spent at SR84 Seed and the one at the race track in Miami.  Newcomer, Oldcomer, Oldtimer, opps back to newcomer.  
 
I've been reading through the topics here for a couple of days.  I can't believe how many memories  have been dug up.  You see, I don't tell people I went to the Seed.  It's buried.  But, I remember the Orange Bowl, the peanut butter& jelly, koolaid, being "come down on" cigarettes being passed to end of row, the sick room where staff told us the people from the courts withdrew from herion on what they thought was methedone but was really asprin.  I never met a real live junkie or prostitute till I went to the Seed.

It's so good to hear so many of you say you can't remember so clearly because NEITHER CAN I!

I have really mixed feelings about the whole thing.  I guess that's part of why it's surpressed.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this forum.

[Antigen]

On 2003-10-31 16:49:00, Anonymous wrote:

I believe I was probally going to have the bad attitude, smart mouth, and yes, experiment with drugs and alcohol, but that ultimately I would come out on the other end OK. But, of course I'll never know because from 1972 - 1977 off and on were spent at SR84 Seed and the one at the race track in Miami. Newcomer, Oldcomer, Oldtimer, opps back to newcomer.

Me too. You might have wondered about the funny woman on the parents' side at open meeting with a blond daughter, age 7 - 12 (for as long as you were on SR-84) who, most of the time, didn't have a kid in the program. I suppose she thought that open meetings would vaccinate me against druggieculture? Who knows why that woman ever did anything that she did?

Anyway, my eldest is 19. I also had a rough time figuring things out because my only point of reference for my teen years was the program. I usually just deferred to my husband cause, despite the various flaws in his family, mine had been like the Mansons. That wasn't always the best choice, however.

We should talk.

Give to every other human being every right that you claim for yourself - that is my doctrine.

--Thomas Paine

[GregFL]

You know, I always thought because of what I went thru somehow I would magically impart a vaccine against my stupid behavior directly to my son.

Boy, how Idiotic could I be.  My son went thru horrible emotional distress during my divorce, then started drinking and getting in trouble.

I just hung in there, showed him my displeasure and he eventually came around. He is now in his third year at FSU.  GO SEMINOLES!!!!

Now my daughter is 13 and if I was so inclined I would be praying about now. I have come to realize that I can only quide the ship for so long before they take the helm. One thing is sure, She will NEVER endure a stint in Thought reform if I can help it.

WELCOME To our forum! Those mixed feelings are quite normal and more likely the result of you burying the actual experiences as you mentioned in your post. Even tho they are buried, you still found this forum which always isn't easy! This indicates to me that you were searching for something, and I hope you find it here. I also   hope reliving these memories is a positive thing for you...for me it was very uplifting when Ginger, Kathy, Wes, Ken and a few others all stumbled upon each other on the internet and I discovered my private childhood scars were not so unique. I had done everything an adult is supposed to do..had kids, a successfull business, but inside was an empty secret shamefull area.  Guess what? It no longer is a secret for the most part, even my kids know, and I have redirected the shame back to those responsible.

 For several years Ginger prodded me on starting the SDF and am very happy with the results here, and extremely happy you took the time to log on and post. I look forward to your participation and would love a story about an experience at the seed.

               The body of
        Benjamin Franklin, printer,
      (Like the cover of an old book,
            Its contents worn out,
    And scripts of it's lettering and gilding)
       Lies Here, food for worms!
     Yet the work itself shall not be lost,
For it will, as he believed, appear once more
                 In a new
         And more beautiful edition,
          Corrected and amended
                By it's Author!

Epitaph for himself.

--Benjamin Franklin 1706-1790