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Offline LeeBunnys

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...on a non Straight related issue...
« on: September 12, 2003, 05:47:00 PM »
My ex husbands birthday is coming up. Do I buy the asshole a gift to give him from our daughter?
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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Offline Lixor

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...on a non Straight related issue...
« Reply #1 on: September 12, 2003, 07:21:00 PM »
Depends if the child is old enough to do it themselves.  My ex takes our daughter to get me a present and I do the same thing for her.

However, we have a pretty good relationship.  Judging from the petname you refer to him as I am guessing you guys are not friends.

I always think of it like this:  Don't penalize the child for the situation.  Make it as normal as possible for them.  Just do the next right thing.

Will
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Offline Antigen

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...on a non Straight related issue...
« Reply #2 on: September 12, 2003, 08:07:00 PM »
I tried to be civil w/ my ex, to never run him down to our daughter or really let her know how much I hated the SOB. I think I overcompensated trying to be nice, for her sake, cause she loved him and had a really wonderful and cherished relationship with his mother.

As it turns out, the grandmother died of cancer when my daughter was just about 10 years old. So I'm glad we played it as we did for that reason. But, at the same time, we'd just found out some months prior that the asshole had been engaging in criminally inapropriate activities with our daughter.

My gut instinct had been to let my new boyfriend (now husband) beat the guy senseless the first time he barged into our apartment without knocking and proceeded to bitch me out for not keeping my place clean enough and for having a male friend over for the night. In retrospect, I think I should have gone with my gut on that one. The way he treated me while we were together, I should have known he would be fucking with our little girl at least psychologically and emotionally.

It is one of the most beautiful compensations of life, that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson

« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
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"Don\'t let the past remind us of what we are not now."
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Offline GregFL

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...on a non Straight related issue...
« Reply #3 on: September 15, 2003, 11:26:00 AM »
Yes....grit your teeth and do the right thing...for your daughter.


for it is a truth, which the experience of all ages has attested, that the people are commonly most in danger when the means of insuring their rights are in the possession of those of whom they entertain the least suspicion.    
--Alexander Hamilton

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