Author Topic: John K  (Read 230 times)

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Offline Anonymous

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John K
« on: December 31, 2008, 07:25:29 AM »
I would like to clarify something from another post, if you read through what I wrote you will find that I did not accuse you of "ordering a beating". You couldnt have you were guy staff, that was Letha.
What I said was, I was ordered by Letha to take Kim S into the back room and "make sure she behaved and make sure she got the idea", it was CLEAR a beating was to take place.
You and Letha were running morning rap, Letha ordered it. After a few minutes you and Letha didn't hear a tussel going on that you would expect to hear. So, you and Letha came in the room (do you remember the box fan that was in the room). Letha asked "What are you doing, you are suppose to be teaching her a lesson". I pulled a knife and pointed it at both you and letha and said "There will be no more beatings". You stepped towards me (btw you were one of the few staff members at the time that I didnt hate with a passion).. I told you take one more step John and Ill stab you, Suddenly Chris C and a few others came running in, you came straight toward me, somehow i ended up bent over the box fan staring at you leg, I had the knife inches from your leg, I was going to stab you in the leg to get away and defend Kim, it was at that point that the knife was ripped from my hand, i think by you but not sure. The nightmare of that memory for me was having to chose that extreme at that age.
-----Now where is the horriable accusation there--------
I also said in a post "I never saw John physically attack someone". Read the post

Now, the incident with boy that got raped. You and Letha were doing morning rap when the boy stood up and reported it. AT THAT POINT I HATED YOU AND LETHA BECAUSE THE OLDCOMERS WERE ONLY PUT ON A 14 DAY REFRESHER. Who made that judgement call. I don't know. However, sitting there in group the punishment came from you and letha. Maybe you were told to, maybe you thought it as evil as I did but couldnt say anything , who knows. To me,  a kid all I saw was what happened. If you chose to report it, I didn't know about it, if you chose not to report it I wouldnt kow that either. I am certain that if you had reported it to senior staff they wouldn't have cared. Whether you did or did not report it is something only you can answer.

Whatever you have regret for is your business. I am sure if you think about it you will remember the situation.
now, in the knife incident what did you do wrong. Nothing you were there. LETHA , I REPEAT LETHA ordered it.
Now, on the other incident, what did you do wrong (or do you think I am accussing you of) I dont know, I don't know who came up with that punishment. But I HAD EVERY RIGHT TO BE FURIOUS, AT A CHILD BEING RAPED AND VIRTUALLY NOTHING DONE ABOUT IT, WHAT YOU GOT IN THE OTHER POST WAS SIMPLY THAT , BURRIED FURY OVER AN INCIDENT WHERE YOU WERE IN FRONT OF GROUP. Did you choose the 14 day refresher or were you told to do that . I don''t know what i do know is that ALL i saw was you and Letha in charge of group that morning. You all were in charge, I held you all responsible all these years. Now, what may have happened is that you were told to only put that oldcomer on a 14 day refresher who knows only you. I was on staff too for a short period and I allowed some things to happen that I am not proud of and I wouldn't blame the person if they were angry at me if they experienced something similiar.
What guilt you hold for anything you did in there is no different than the guilt any of hold as we all did things we regret for a variety of reasons.  
I did not accuse you of hitting anyone, I did not accuse you of ordering it, other than to say you were in front of group,
Your post on the last topic told me that you already have done soul searching , you yourself said at first you had no regrets but having thought about it you have some. , you apologized to anyone you may have hurt - what else could anyone ask- I am sure that you thought you were helping people, we all thought that at one point or another.
I know all of this is just coming to you , so I need to have patience.

John, Look your just a survivor like the rest of us, you hurt some as we all did, you carry some guilt like many, and you survived a nightmare.
If you and Margaret are together now and doing well, thats great.
I really wish you would call me so we can talk about this. Ginger has my info.
I took offense to being called a liar, and I had just as much right to vent my anger over a memory as the next survivor. I am no longer angry over it because i did get to vent it. I would like to talk to you about it.
Since, it involves me and you , I think we should talk about it.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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Re: John K
« Reply #1 on: December 31, 2008, 08:19:43 AM »
John, When i wrote the post above I had an apt to go to , I re read my post from the other subject.

I am hoping you can understand this,

You and Letha were in front of group , in charge of group when both those incidents happened, I was a kid, around 14 or 15 you were 16 or 17 . In our mindset you were in charge of what happened in group, you were staff. So, I blamned you not for the rape of the kid or for the ordering of beating of Kim S but for allowing it to happen and when you came on all happy with no regrets I hit the roof. Can you understand that. I spent years blaming you , enraged and when I re read my post I could see how much anger was there over those two incidents. Again, I didnt say you did it but in group as a child I held you responsible. So, the fury you got was that pent up rage because it appeared that you came off like "oh wow I never saw anything real bad". and "I have no regrets" and then I was called a liar , that it never happened, then raked over the coals over a memory that was VERY painful for me So, can you understand the anger you got back.
The truth is you were a child too even though on staff. I did not accuse you of beating anyone in fact i said i never saw you do that. As a child my anger should have been directed at the adults or the staff that loved hurting people.
You only have to answer for what you did. I don't hate you. I think through all the post someone took it as I was accussing you of having raped that kid or beaten Kim S. that is not the case.
Can you understand if you experienced that , then the person who was suppose to be in charge at the time came up to you and called you a liar  and said i have no regrets and what did it get worse after i left, i never saw anything bad, can you see how you would have responded.

I know the more you reflect on what happened the more you will remember, the more the brainwashing of it wasnt so bad will wear off,
Ginger plse give john my email. I would like to talk to you.I am not angry at all , but I would like to talk to you about it more for my benefit than anything else.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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Re: John K
« Reply #2 on: December 31, 2008, 01:38:12 PM »
I am a former paid employee of Straight.

Chris Cassler directed along with his wife child abuse at Straight. (Period)
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Anonymous

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Re: John K
« Reply #3 on: January 01, 2009, 04:54:39 AM »
christ Marti, give this shit with this guy a rest. You're looking like a loon with all these rambling posts, one after the other. ::deadhorse::
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »

Offline Antigen

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Re: John K
« Reply #4 on: January 01, 2009, 11:50:07 AM »
Quote from: "Smith Mr"
I am a former paid employee of Straight.

Chris Cassler directed along with his wife child abuse at Straight. (Period)

You mean Pam G? If that's so, I guess I know you. PM me if you want. I'm curious to know who you are. Check my references if you like. I'm pretty good about keeping confidence.
« Last Edit: December 31, 1969, 07:00:00 PM by Guest »
"Don\'t let the past remind us of what we are not now."
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