Author Topic: 'Hooked' On a Feeling...  (Read 6753 times)

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Offline Froderik

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« on: May 28, 2003, 10:48:00 PM »
Sex raps - the worst. Time to talk about how sex and "perverted" acts are tied into your 'chemical dependency'. Yeah, you "got good feelings" from it, so it has to be wrong, right? Everything we did was "abnormal" and "immoral". Pre-marital sex! God forbid!! Only a "druggie" would do that... :scared:
How degrading! Those were the WORST. Real THERAPEUTIC. I got a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach every time we had one of those. Was it once a week??
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Offline ehm

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« Reply #1 on: May 28, 2003, 11:29:00 PM »
I heard some of the most degrading things people should have never been expected to talk about in a group there. Personal things. I'm sure some of those confessions have never stopped haunting people. The shame we were made to feel about our bodies, our sexual preferences or feelings distorted and filled with guilt. Our pain and suffering was always our faults. Horrible... I confessed to being raped and was led to believe it was my fault because I was a "Druggie." (I had been 13 at the time)
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Offline kosmonaut

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« Reply #2 on: May 29, 2003, 01:59:00 PM »
Sex raps were the worst, most definitely.  

Thinking back, it's amazing that those of us here are still functioning in society.
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AR CRASH TURNS FROWN UPSIDE DOWN

Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #3 on: June 04, 2003, 11:42:00 PM »
Hooga-chukka  :rofl:
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Offline mithygato

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« Reply #4 on: June 05, 2003, 12:21:00 AM »
Hey everybody,

Sex rap to me is a fucking t.v. reality series Straight out of the past.  Fox would air it if they could . . .

The sex raps are by far the wierdest thing I have ever experienced in my life . . . having to express those types of issues to anyone but family and certified professionals who are trained in that area is without excuse!
If I could go back in time I would probably stake the  building and SERIOUSLY hurt a lot of upper phasers and staff.
Big time.

I am sure it was a lot worse for the girls, since one in four girls in the U.S. are estimated to have been sexually abused/molested before age 18.
Most of the girls I've dated, and a close family member have chosen to trust me with painful experiences such as these.  I would never scream at them, blame them and put them even through even  more abuse.
What they (Straight)did was sick.
 

Being guys, I think alot of us (especially us Hellraisers) thought of the guys sex rap as being a bragging festival, and issues such as rape rarely came up in our guys rap.

However, I know for a fact many of the girls raised just as much objection as the guys.
I can't imagine the girls individual raps and what you all were forced to talk about.
Being forced to discuss those types of issues with a bunch of people laughing and screaming at you when you are a 13+ girl is nothing more than psychological and emotional torture.

A few times the raps were held in the main room, so everyone shared together.
That was private stuff that was no one's business - they forced us to talk even if we had to make up shit as we went along just to appease the group.

I hate those people - they were evil then and alot of them have probably never changed.
May they all rot in Hell and die a painful death at an early age.

David
M.I.A.
Straight Richardson 88/89  ::stab::
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The way in which a man accepts his fate and all the suffering it entails, the way in which he takes up his cross, gives him ample opportunity-even under the most difficult cirumstances-to add deeper meaning to his life.  It may remain brave, dignified an

Offline METALGOD8

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« Reply #5 on: June 05, 2003, 11:19:00 AM »
::ftard:: Weel, I had not had any sexual experiences in life prior to the program other than some heavy petting in a car a couple times. My parents had kept me pretty much "in line" bein in private school and military school and whatever. So anyway, when I got stood up to relate about sexual experiences, it was definitely AWKWARD! All the guys would talk about how they did it and I could only stand there like  ::ftard:: They left alone after that.
I firmly believe that confessing these kinds of things was a prerequisite to advancing in the program. I remember 5th phasers just rattling away about "GET HONEST!" to newcomers, and "YOU'RE FULL OF SHIT!" as the underlings would choke with embarrassment etc. I was never called on to confront anyone, being the burned out, non combative type I suppose they decided there was no point in pressing sexual issues with me so much. Like beating a dead horse I suppose.
I know one thing,  :smokin:
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Offline ClayL

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« Reply #6 on: June 05, 2003, 11:32:00 AM »
The thing I noticed about the raps that had a lot to do with sex is there were staff members you could always count on to have sex be the topic. Alice Rollins, Alan Holcombe, Steve Cavander, Pam Streakman, Patty something and some others I can't remember really stand out as being all to willing to hear these stories. Damn I wish I could remember her name. I can remember thinking they were really sick as this was all they wanted to talk about.

I'm thinking this could be the cause for some of the kinks in my sex drive. I guess it wouldn't be the only thing straight helped me with........

CL
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Offline ClayL

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« Reply #7 on: June 05, 2003, 12:14:00 PM »
Quote
Carolina Journal Exclusives
The Problem of Rape Statistics
Real risks buried in a mountain of misleading data, scare stories

By Jon Sanders
May 30, 2003
 
RALEIGH ? A news article in The Daily Tar Heel April 24 contained a shocking lead: ?A woman is raped every two minutes. Almost one in every four women between the ages of 18 and 24 is a survivor of sexual assault.?

No sources for this information are given ? which is mildly surprising since it is published in the campus newspaper for the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, a UNC flagship university with a well-known school of journalism. It is not, however, unusual for any campus discussion of that particular subject. Here are a few examples just from the current academic year:

? ?There are probably 200 to 250 undergraduate men on this campus who are rapists (one out of 15), based on a 15-year old survey. Fifteen percent of undergraduate men say they would commit rape if there was no chance of punishment.? Jillian Johnson, ?Stop Rape at Duke,? Duke University Chronicle, Feb. 27, 2003

? ?1 in 4 college women,? sign seen at UNC-Chapel Hill protest of violence against women, as reported in the DTH, Nov. 5, 2002

? ?Anytime a woman is drunk and has sex, she has then been raped.? Andrew A. Farr, N.C. State Technician, Sept. 24, 2002

? ?Every three hours and 52 minutes, a rape is committed in North Carolina. Most of the victims are women. One in four college women report surviving rape.? Dana Henderson, Technician, Sept. 10, 2002

? ?I am 100 percent sure that at least one rape has occurred on campus since school has started ... anywhere from one in three to one in eight women will be assaulted in her lifetime.? Bryan Proffit, Technician, Aug. 27, 2002 (one week after school started)

What is going on? Are our universities undergoing an epidemic of curiously unreported rape? Or is something else at work? As Katie Rophie wrote in the New York Times Magazine of June 13, 1993, in response to the one-in-four statistic: ?If 25 percent of my women friends were really being raped, wouldn?t I know it??

Christina Hoff Sommers, author of Who Stole Feminism?, has provided the answer. The one-in-four statistic hails from a 1985 Ms. magazine report by Mary Koss. Koss interviewed about 3,000 randomly selected college women about sexual violation. She determined that 25.7 percent were victims of rape or attempted rape ?because they gave answers that fit Koss?s criteria for rape? ? which bear scrutiny, as they are ?penetration by penis, finger, or other object under coercive influence such as physical force, alcohol, or threats.? Those broad criteria may explain why only 27 percent of Koss? ?rape victims? considered themselves to be rape victims. Also, Koss considered a woman a victim of sexual assault if she answered ?yes? to (and 53.7 ?victims? did) ?Have you ever given in to sex play (fondling, kissing, or petting, but not intercourse) when you didn?t want to because you were overwhelmed by a man?s continual arguments and pressure??

University of California Berkeley Professor Neil Gilbert pointed out a key flaw in that study: Koss?s categorizing as having been raped any woman who answered ?yes? to ?Have you had sexual intercourse when you didn?t want to because a man gave you alcohol or drugs?? As Gilbert wrote in Current Controversies in Family Violence, edited by Richard Gelles and Donileen Loseke, ?What does having sex ?because? a man gives you drugs or alcohol signify? A positive response does not indicate whether duress, intoxication, force, or the threat of force were present; whether the woman?s judgment or control were substantially impaired; or whether the man purposefully got the woman drunk in order to prevent her resistance to sexual advances.?

Sommers also points out a key flaw in the ?one-in-eight? statistic cited above, which is from Dean Kilpatrick?s "National Woman?s Study." Kilpatrick?s study is ?a fairly straightforward and well-designed survey? on rape and asked questions about intercourse, oral sex, anal sex, or penetration by ?fingers or objects? done ?against your will by using force or threat of harm.? The last category, however, as Sommers explains, ?includes cases in which a boy penetrated a girl with his finger, against her will, in a heavy petting situation. Certainly the boy behaved badly. But is he a rapist? Probably neither he nor his date would say so,? she wrote. ?Yet the survey classifies him as a rapist and her as a rape victim.?

Politics intrude

The problem of the faulty statistics owes to ?the intrusion of politics into the field of inquiry,? Sommers said. ?There are many researchers who study rape victimization, but their relatively low figures generate no headlines.? Among them: a 1993 Louis Harris and Associates telephone poll that found only 2 percent of women were victims of rape or sexual assault; Professor Mary Gordon of the University of Washington?s 1981 study that found only one in 50 women raped; and Duke researcher Dr. Linda George, who found, using ?questions very close to Kilpatrick?s? one in 17.

Another problem Sommers cites is ?the morally indefensible way that public funds for combating rape are being allocated.? Specifically, ?college women are getting the lion?s share of public resources for combating rape? despite studies (which she cites) showing that rape rates are far higher in poor areas than wealthy areas and far lower for women on a college or university campus than for women off campus.

Underscoring that latter fact, UNC-Greensboro students are dealing with the reality of a serial rapist who is attacking women in neighborhoods near campus (seven had been attacked by mid-April). Major J. C. Herring, assistant chief of UNCG Police, wrote to the UNCG Carolinian April 7 pointing out that ?None of the attacks occurred on campus? and said ?the University should use the incidents to encourage students to live on campus where they have the benefit of secured residence halls, well lighted streets, a professional police force, and the safety escort service.?

At UNC-CH, meanwhile, the DTH story cited at the beginning of this article contrasted the ?one-in-four? claim with UNC-CH?s comparatively low numbers of ?only two rapes [on campus] in 2002 and only 17 sexual assault victims.? For the DTH, ?the numbers don?t add up? ? and it takes the ?one-in-four? statistic as gospel truth while viewing UNC-CH police?s official numbers as clearly wrong and indicative of a greater problem.

UNC-CH?s solution underscores Sommers? point about rape resource allocation. ?UNC officials submitted a grant application last week to the U.S. Department of Justice,? the story said. ?If the grant is approved, the money will be used to re-evaluate UNC?s Sexual Assault Response Plan, add an antiviolence program to C-TOPS and create a media campaign against violence at the University, said Melinda Manning, assistant dean of students.?


Sanders is assistant editor at Carolina Journal.

 


A good site:

http://www.ifeminists.net/index.php

I have to take issue with the espoused gender feminist manifesto. I, however, do not think that people in straight were representative of the norms and this article and site do not apply to our experiences there. This is more stuff I keep track of to see what I can expect from the PC crowd where my son is concerned.

CL
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #8 on: June 05, 2003, 08:44:00 PM »
I don't know about 1 in 4 necessarily (Yes if a woman is too drunk to say no then she is raped, but every person who get's drunk and decides to get it on is not a rape victom or rapist)but I think that a lore more men and women are rape victoms then we necessarily know. But with my experience in the program every single girl was raped or aussalted in some way and that didn't seem right. Of course staff said that it was because "Druggies" put themselves in those positions but hardly any of the kids were really "druggies" anyways (not that anyone puts themselves in a position to be raped). So why did all the girls have stories of rape? Because if you didn't you were "Full of shit" and had to "fess up" or you would never graduate.
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Offline ClayL

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« Reply #9 on: June 06, 2003, 08:43:00 AM »
Quote
On 2003-06-05 17:44:00, Anonymous wrote:

"Yes if a woman is too drunk to say no then she is raped, but every person who get's drunk and decides to get it on is not a rape victom or rapist"


How do you figure? I'll agree that if someone passes out or is otherwise incapacitated and some poor excuse of a human takes advantage of that condition, that would be rape. What about the person that gets good and drunk and then in the AM decides "God, I wish I hadn't done that, but I was in no condition to say no. Oh my god, I've been raped!" The person in question never lost consciousness and in fact greatly enjoyed themselves during the escapade. I would not call this rape. I would call it failing to take responsibility for ones actions. The gender feminists' dogma that I have issue with doesn't see it this way. To them it is rape even if the freaky play'a changes their mind after the act.

Hell, I have several encounters with women that I wish had never happened. Does this mean I've also been raped.

Please Note: I know this is a touchy subject and have no wish to belittle or demean persons who have been sexually abused. I am not speaking about those issues and completely agree that is not the victim's fault. I further believe this is a silent issue and there are a vast number of unreported cases. I just disagree with the figure of 25% of women. Seeing as their are more women than men in America that would make up to 25% of men rapists. I find it hard to fathom that up to 50% of the population in the US is either a rape victim or rapist.

Clay
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Offline Carmel

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« Reply #10 on: June 06, 2003, 10:29:00 AM »
I have to agree with you here Clay....I think that the whole "I said yes, but meant no" issue is way overblown.  I have been drunk many times, and had many encounters that I would never have had otherwise, but not a one of them would I consider rape.  

I think that there is not such a huge gray area where actual violent "rape" is concerned.  I do however, feel that the "idea" of rape encompasses such a huge gray area because of the emotional disruption of individuals.  A girl has relations with someone while drunk, wakes up, feels guilt, wants to feel better....whats a better way than to claim that she was taken advantage of?  Lookie there!  All of a sudden it isnt her fault!  Its RAPE!  Thats where the proverbial "hot McDonalds coffee in the lap" mentality comes in.  You can make anything look really horrible, whether it really is or not is relative to how many people you can convince to think like you do.

I am not discounting rape...I have most certainly been sexually molested before, and I know the difference.  However, the human condition will always prevail, as I am fond of saying.  Where there is smoke, there is fire...and hell hath no fury like a woman scorned...
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Offline Anonymous

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« Reply #11 on: June 06, 2003, 02:06:00 PM »
The pathetic thing is that too many guys in this world (not all) see a passed out girl and think,"Hmmmmm... Look at what we have here..."  :scared:
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Offline ehm

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« Reply #12 on: June 06, 2003, 02:09:00 PM »
um, woops. that was me.
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Offline ehm

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« Reply #13 on: June 06, 2003, 02:18:00 PM »
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Offline Carmel

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« Reply #14 on: June 06, 2003, 03:40:00 PM »
Unfortunately, whats right for one...cannot be right for all...and vice versa.  I think there are very valid relationships that occur between people regardless of age....but how many invalid or unhealthy ones occur as well?

There are two sides to every type of situation.
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