Friendly reminder.

[Covergaard]

I really hope that's not directed towards me. If it is, you have no clue of what kind of person I really am. Sorry you feel the way you do, but nothing could be further from the truth.

You're entitled to your own opinion, but I am telling you, you are way off base.

I'm not going to waste a lot of time trying to explain the kind of person I am to you. Because if you haven't figured it out in the last couple years through my posts, or by talking to me, then you'll never get it me. It's too hard sometimes to get through to you guys. Some of you are so fucking paranoid, and don't trust anyone, it makes it almost impossible for me to even post here. At this point, it just might actually be a waste of my time.

You must remember how their situation is. They are properly not so lucky as you having relatives, who cares. Relatives, who took the time tracking you down and lecturing your parents.

Also keep in mind what kind of damage Cross Creek could have inflicted upon you if you had stayed in it for a longer time.

You can not expect them to believe you if they did not have the opportunity to live in a program, which cared for the children.

If their childhood was getting pulled to a program in the middle the night and being shouted at, how are they going to recognize kindness and care, when someone is trying to reach out to them?

To all of you: This tread makes me sad. We are all aware of the fact that WWASP should run prisons instead of schools. The conditions children are living under is similar to conditions at juvenile prisons in Russia apart from the seminars. Their program is built upon principles from North Korea. Aspen also have their Lifesteps, which are abuse.

But where are we? We are using our energy against each other instead of using our energy fighting those organisations and making better child protection laws.

Treatment - if needed - should be as local as possible. The parents should drop in every day for an evaluation at a predetermited time. No enrollment without an intervention before the child leaves the home. Social workers should have the right stop a placement. etc.

How do fight against them? By every victim telling their story by publishing them at a large number of sites. I have found several stories at www.voy.com (unfortunately the tread is broken several places.), but the number of victim stories are far from the number needed. It makes it too easy for the facilities to claim that "...Is is a small number of bad children and greedy parents ,,,,"

I will just be happy to create links between wikipedia and the survivor stories, so I can document every aspect of the abuse going on at such places.

Fight them and not other victim with a slight different views.

[Anonymous]

Did you even read the same thread Covergaurd? These fucks are suggesting that they have what it takes to make placement at safe schools. Not just any schools but TBS schools. That makes these fucks the enemy and they will be treated as such.


Fuck fairness. Burn them all down.

[Covergaard]

Sometime a TBS is justified, but...

It needs to be as local as possible. I believe that the social network is everything. Sometime the so-called bad company needs to be sorted out. But the most part of the social network needs to stay in order to avoid damage.

Also, the child needs to wants treatment. TBS should be a much needed rest from real life, before the treatment starts. TBS is not the treatment. It is a break needed to gather strength to fight whatever problem we are talking about.

How do you manage to get the child to come and ask for help? By giving your child reason to trust you! As a parent I have to trust them and they have to trust me. If they dont trust me enough, so they will come to me whenever a hard issue in life (relationships, sex, alcohol, drugs) arrise, I have not been a very good parent as well as a very good citizen.

Trust is everything in a family as well when it comes to work. I need my co-workers to come to me and tell me, when they can not perform 100 percent. They do. I also inform them when I need to use my time another place.

They covered for me, when I had a sick relative, I had to visit every day. I have also covered for them.

When said that a TBS can be a solution, it is also important that relatives and friends can visit every day. You can built such places and they are needed in a world as stressful as ours.

The major thing that makes a TBS unjustified besides the abuse is the total isolation from the social network of the child. Could every town have such a place for rest, where the children could get some volentary peace and do their schoolwork, the world could be a better place.

[CCM girl 1989]

Parents should seek advice from professionals, not program survivors on the internet. That much is clear.

They sure as hell can know what a program will do to someone by talking to someone who lived through it.

I mean, sure, if you WANT to make your kid end up like us and end up on fornits, sign right hte fuck up  :roll:

Niles, any parents at any time could come to me if they needed to know what programs could potentionally do mentally to their kids. As far as you saying " if you WANT to make your kids end up like us, and end up on fornits, sign right the fuck up." Hmmmm.....what's "US" I am thinking I have less and less in common with you all everyday. When will most of the people on this board stop blaming everything bad going on in their lives from past program experiences? I can understand people in their mid 20's still struggling..........but there are people in their 40's that are still like, well if my parents didn't do what they did to me, I'd be a lot different then I am today. Yes, that's true to a point. But, start taking a little responsibility for how your life is turning out.

I have a bit of advice for those of you who continue to whine about it. Get over it! Fuck 'em, and move on. As far as we know, we are only on this earth once. Live life to it's fullest. Stand up for what you believe in, but stop acting like such victims. Really, in the end it doesn't matter who did what to you, and when. It matters what you do afterwards with your life. If you let them scar you for life, you are letting those bastards win. Why give them that, didn't they do enough already?

They're are people in life who are extremely successful, that went through much worse shit then most of us here, and they still came out on top! Because they were fighters. You know why that benifits us? Because when they speak in public on matters related to abuse, and what it did to them, people will listen. When called to a witness stand, to give a statement in court who do you think the jury will believe? A person who is acting all nutty, and going off on tangents, or someone who comes and says look this is my story, this is what it did to me, this is how it affected me for years in my life afterwards, this is how I finally got the strength to move forward, and this is what I do in life now. These are the healthy relationships that I am able to have, this is the company I work for, give any one on this list of 50 people a call to ask them what they think of me. They will all tell you, I am not a liar, or a manipulator, but that I am strong yet sensitive person. Basically, I am a straight shooter. A lot of people on here don't like that because it makes them look at themselves, and maybe they are finally scratching their head going why am I so stuck in the past, and yes it's giving them the power still, and it's been 20+ years later.

For parents out there that feel they were swindled out of thousands, and thousands of dollars. I say go for it, go after them. Bring lots of documentation, and proof. Not only was it your hard earned money, sometimes even your retirement, or maybe your on some fucking 20 year loan program that you feel trapped in, because if you don't pay it, it could fuck up your credit, which in life means everything these days. But, they lied to you. They fooled you.

I'm not going to forget to mention what  bad programs do to families. It basically ruins them. Sometimes for 5 years, 10 years, or 15 years for me, or just forever. The family unit is such an important thing, that so many parents forget to realize how fragile it is. The programs that swoop in, and lie to these parents just to get rich will go to hell. And the people who refer them to these places knowing very little about them will be right their with them. It's not fair that while these families lives are fucked, people that work at all these programs/agencies, or own some of these programs, and are making the big money, are sitten pretty taking families on fun vacations, buying the wife new cars, and giving out credit cards with a high limits to everyone in their family to do whatever their heart desires. Yeah, that's fucked. I agree.

But still, I will never say all programs are bad. Never.

[Anonymous]

Sorry to say pickle dick a TBS is never justified. If you kid is that out of hand that they need confinement it is a matter for the authorities. Not some flakey idiots spewing purile bullshit out of every orfice.

WTF is up with this shit? All the sudden the ripe stench of program apologists starts wafting over this site? Fuck.. sickens me that people even are entertaining the thought of a fucking TBS.

[Froderik]

CCM girl,

Perhaps you should pull that chain on the side of your head and flush your mind!

[Anonymous]

Where does CCM come off calling any survivor of a program a "whiner" and telling them to "get over it?"
CCM need to get a grip and realize it is not a matter of trust-she came on fornits supporting Kevin August and his disgraceful referral business, and talking about her own interest in this referral business, and what a great job she could do, herself.
CCM, you don't listen, but STFU!

[hanzomon4]

Covergaard, You  mean well and I highly respect the work you're doing on wikipedia. I get what you're saying about TBS and kids needing a break from life, however we have to understand the reality of the TBS industry. While some programs may not be abusive there's nothing in place to insure this. Essentially you're placing the safety of children on nothing more then the choices of a few individuals.

The dangers in TBS does not lie in the bad intentions of evil people, but rather in the lack of accountability which is present in all facilities.  The answer to stopping the abuse of children in TBS is not to refer them to less abusive facilities, you must first change the law and to change the law you must first make societal change. The civil rights  movement and the woman's rights movement  demonstrates perfectly the need to change society before you can reap any serious legislative change. I feel that to bring about this societal change you must defeat 3 things

• Silence - on the part of survivors
• ignorance -  on the part of parents
• Indifference - on the part of Society

Ignorance and Indifference can only be defeated by the collective voice of survivors, without their testimony we will never see change.  By referring parents to any TBS without first brining societal and legislative change you will be essentially saying that the current protections are  enough and that no societal or legislative change is needed. This is dangerous and will only lead to more of the same, a shady industry with a shady record....

CCM, you have no right to call anyone here a whiner just because they're still affected by the abuse they suffered. We all move on in our own way and criticizing others for not doing so in the timely manner you expect is wrong.

[Froderik]

Where does CCM come off calling any survivor of a program a "whiner" and telling them to "get over it?"
CCM need to get a grip and realize it is not a matter of trust-she came on fornits supporting Kevin August and his disgraceful referral business, and talking about her own interest in this referral business, and what a great job she could do, herself.
CCM, you don't listen, but STFU!

I'd sooner die in the streets than refer a kid to some abusive program!
Anyone who does this is a shitbag opportunist in need of a good beating...
That is all.

[Anne Bonney]

I am thinking I have less and less in common with you all everyday.

I'm thinking the same thing.

When will most of the people on this board stop blaming everything bad going on in their lives from past program experiences? I can understand people in their mid 20's still struggling..........but there are people in their 40's that are still like, well if my parents didn't do what they did to me, I'd be a lot different then I am today. Yes, that's true to a point. But, start taking a little responsibility for how your life is turning out.

Bite me you little shit.:roll:  :rofl:   Speaking as one of those in their 40s, I would be a lot different than I am today if not for my unfortunate incarceration.  I've got a great life now, but it took me a damn long time and hard work to get here.

I have a bit of advice for those of you who continue to whine about it. Get over it! Fuck 'em, and move on. As far as we know, we are only on this earth once. Live life to it's fullest. Stand up for what you believe in, but stop acting like such victims. Really, in the end it doesn't matter who did what to you, and when. It matters what you do afterwards with your life. If you let them scar you for life, you are letting those bastards win. Why give them that, didn't they do enough already?

Yeah, well I've got some advice for you.  Follow El Nino's instructions.  We're here because people like you insist on perpetuating this bullshit.

They're are people in life who are extremely successful, that went through much worse shit then most of us here, and they still came out on top! Because they were fighters. You know why that benifits us? Because when they speak in public on matters related to abuse, and what it did to them, people will listen. When called to a witness stand, to give a statement in court who do you think the jury will believe? A person who is acting all nutty, and going off on tangents, or someone who comes and says look this is my story, this is what it did to me, this is how it affected me for years in my life afterwards, this is how I finally got the strength to move forward, and this is what I do in life now.

People behave differently here than they would in court, moron.:roll:


 

T Basically, I am a straight shooter. A lot of people on here don't like that because it makes them look at themselves, and maybe they are finally scratching their head going why am I so stuck in the past, and yes it's giving them the power still, and it's been 20+ years later.

 :roll:  :roll:  :roll:  :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:
Sheeeesh!!  Get over yourself kid!  Are you trying to do an impression of staff?  It's pretty good.  I used to hear the staff at Straight tell me that shit all the time.  

I'm not going to forget to mention what  bad programs do to families. It basically ruins them. Sometimes for 5 years, 10 years, or 15 years for me, or just forever.

Didn't you just tell those same people to "get over it"?

The family unit is such an important thing, that so many parents forget to realize how fragile it is. The programs that swoop in, and lie to these parents just to get rich will go to hell. And the people who refer them to these places knowing very little about them will be right their with them. It's not fair that while these families lives are fucked, people that work at all these programs/agencies, or own some of these programs, and are making the big money, are sitten pretty taking families on fun vacations, buying the wife new cars, and giving out credit cards with a high limits to everyone in their family to do whatever their heart desires. Yeah, that's fucked. I agree.

But still, I will never say all programs are bad. Never.

 


And I'll never say that TBS/RTCs and the whole concept on which they are based are effective or safe.  Never.  So there.   ::both::  ::fuckoff::  ::both::  ::fuckoff::

[Froderik]

You might as well just shut your fucking yap right now, CCM girl....

[Anonymous]

That post hit home with Anne, as it should have.  Hope you take it to heart and get over yourself.

[Froderik]

That post hit home with Anne, as it should have.  Hope you take it to heart and get over yourself.

Homo says what?

[Anne Bonney]

Hey little girl, you're sounding more and more like the staff at these places every day.  Defending oneself is a sure sign that something has "hit home" with them.  Uh huh.

Could it possibly be that I'm even more disgusted by a survivor of one of these mindrape mills is trying to refer kids to other mindrape mills?  Nah, it has to be bacause the post "hit home".

 :roll:

I've got nothing to "get over" babe.  I'm not the one advocating shipping kids off to unqualified strangers to fix, and going on and on about what a great person I am for doing something and what assholes everyone else is for not seeing what a wonderful person I am.

[Anonymous]

But you are the one blaming your adult life on a program you were in 20 years ago.  Notice how few former program people, compared to the whole population, are on fornits claiming every single program is bad. Not many.  At some point, you have to take things in your own hands and get over it and stop living out your disappointments on a message board.