The Who

[Deborah]

Does anyone know if ASR is sufficiently licensed to be a 'therapeutic school'?

 :rofl: They are not.

[Anonymous]

Your sick kid ("sick" being either real or perceived by you) got inconvenient so you dumped the kid off at "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" and even if you didn't know in the past that it was statistically worse for the kid than care in the community or, if the kid really was sick, worse than appropriate treatment options, you have no excuse for not knowing now.

You're a selfish, sad individual who is desperately trying to masquerade as a decent human being, in this case by trying to convince others to do the same rotten, selfish thing you did.

Parents should get appropriate care for their kids when their kids get sick, or therapy if their kids need it.

Parents should not dump their especially vulnerable kids off in a facility that is a bad choice just because it's a pain in the ass to personally care for and raise a needy kid.

You're as bad as the Lexus parents who work seventy plus hours a week and dump their kids off on a succession of au pairs and nannies.

Or the pet owners who dump their pregnant dog off at the pound so they don't have to deal with the litter.

You did a rotten thing. Everybody does something rotten sometime. But instead of owning up and taking responsibility, you keep frantically trying to justify what you did. No wonder your poor kid had problems.

Julie

[Anne Bonney]

This is the kind of shit that tells me that ASR is no different, fundamentally, from Straight.

http://fornits.com/wwf/viewtopic.php?t= ... c&start=15

When I was there:

1) No, kids were NOT restrained

2) I do not have the knowledge to answer this question

3) Yes, they did. There were, if I remember correctly, 4 levels.

4) Phone calls were once a week with the amount of time increasing as you progressed in the program. Until the end of the program you could not make phone calls without staff in the room.
There were 2 home visits and one hotel visit. I don't know that the hotel visit was a right. Unless you were dropped peer groups you were able to go on home visits as scheduled.

5) Campus visits were basically limited to ones that were scheduled (family resolutions). Parents were STRONGLY discouraged from coming and it was a big no-no for a kid to ask their parents to come.
I remember a mom came to drop off some things for her child and later the girl was told it was "not right" that her mom had come.

1) The education program was poor. We did not even have a full set of encyclopedias. Some of the teachers were good, others did not seem qualified to teach the subjects they were.

2) I'm not sure what "anyone" means but essentially, yes. They definitely took kids that they did not have the means to treat. (for example, eating disorders)

3) If someone was on medication (and a lot of kids were) you saw an individual doctor. You also have therapy within your group and then once a week in a mixed group with kids from many other "peer groups". There were special groups and "life steps". Lots of crying, yelling, etc. Some of the things that went on in group I believe was wrong.

1) If someone refused to talk in group they would often be placed on a Reflection, the lightest of the consequences. You would receive a folder with a "truth list" and writing assignments to do things like "Why I feel I don't have to talk in group".

2) Bans were used to prohibit relationships being formed that the school thought to be "unhealthy". Bans included simply looking at another person. Bans could span from one person, one sex, a portion of the school (ie lower school), or the entire school.

3) I'm sure that some did, however you could not move forward in the program without doing so, so I think that most kids gave in and did it.

Sorry, forgot the last. I believe your counselors approved level changes, you had to be in a certain stage of the program to move on. Some people never made it to the highest level, which allowed you to stay up til 11 and watch approved TV in the great room after everyone else had to go to sleep. It basically meant that you were "trusted"

1) Peer groups were a group of about 15 kids who you went through the entire program with, from base camp to costa rica. You had group therapy together, sat together during all meetings and did "life steps" together.

2) I don't know if anyone ever got their phone call completely taken away. I got my right to "private" phone calls (a counselor was always in the room monitoring anyway) taken away. I had to have conference calls for a few weeks.

3) All mail was screened. Only approved friends could write, and they could only begin sending you mail after you were pretty far into the program. All mail was opened, read and searched.If a counselor thought something was innapropriate you did't get the mail.

I am not sure if it is entirely different from what you know.

1) I think everyone to some extent lied to get out of the program. Some people went through the program having done drugs, had sex, etc but would never admit to it and were never caught. You learned to be compliant and really just to say whatever they wanted you to.

2) Two counselors (either your assigned peer group counselors or, when in mixed group, other peer group's counselors). If someone was in a lot of trouble they would bring in the "big guns", I forget their titles but I think some where directors.

3) I saw a psychologist about every 2 weeks or so. Summaries of these sessions where sent to parents. Some things I NEVER would have wanted my parents to know or hear about were included in these reports.

[TheWho]

Your sick kid ("sick" being either real or perceived by you) got inconvenient so you dumped the kid off at "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" and even if you didn't know in the past that it was statistically worse for the kid than care in the community or, if the kid really was sick, worse than appropriate treatment options, you have no excuse for not knowing now.

You're a selfish, sad individual who is desperately trying to masquerade as a decent human being, in this case by trying to convince others to do the same rotten, selfish thing you did.

Parents should get appropriate care for their kids when their kids get sick, or therapy if their kids need it.

Parents should not dump their especially vulnerable kids off in a facility that is a bad choice just because it's a pain in the ass to personally care for and raise a needy kid.

You're as bad as the Lexus parents who work seventy plus hours a week and dump their kids off on a succession of au pairs and nannies.

Or the pet owners who dump their pregnant dog off at the pound so they don't have to deal with the litter.

You did a rotten thing. Everybody does something rotten sometime. But instead of owning up and taking responsibility, you keep frantically trying to justify what you did. No wonder your poor kid had problems.

Julie

Well if you think I did a rotten thing I am sorry for you, but we are doing very fine as a family and for some reason that seems to bother you and it lowers your quality of life.

[Anne Bonney]

And these.....

Well actually, a while back in the big ASR thread that turned out into an all out war, I posted a few times.

I was so confused when I came out I really can't tell you. There were times that I would get really angry about it and others when the "ASR brain wash effect" came out.

I became interested again because I've recently come across people who I went to ASR with. (only one of whom seems to be doing ok)

Three Springs Waygookin wrote:
1) Attempts at suicide were viewed as manipulation?

2) What would happen after an attempted suicide was discovered?

1) Usually, yes.And they told you that very matter-of-factly.
The same goes for self-mutilation. I understand that SI can be used as manipulation but it does not excuse them brushing it off. They told me that I was using cutting as manipulation...

1)seeing that I had hid it from them for months even though i was body searched several times.
2) and only came forward when my roommate saw when I got out of the shower

I don't think it was. At all. I can honestly say that when I was younger pre-ASR there were times when I did use hurting myself to hurt other people, but I grew out of this pretty quickly and what I did at ASR had nothing to do with getting back at anyone.

2) In one case she was taken to the hospital for stitches and then brought back. I was her escort the next morning when she had to go back into the dorm. I'm pretty sure she was placed on a self-study. (the most severe consequence)

In another a counselor told us about a time he walked in on someone about to hang themselves with a belt. He said [something to the effect of] that he didn't place the kid on a self study because it was obvious he was hurting enough.

[Anonymous]

TheWho, almighty slinger of facts, please tell us which are the states that outlaw anal sex, thanks.

[Anonymous]

Then you should be able to get me a letter from an admissions counselor at one of Massachusetts several Ivy League schools documenting that they consider ASR one of their "feeder schools."

uh   What are the several Ivy League schools in Mass?  Seems to me it's just Haaavahdd.

[Anonymous]

Then you should be able to get me a letter from an admissions counselor at one of Massachusetts several Ivy League schools documenting that they consider ASR one of their "feeder schools."

uh   What are the several Ivy League schools in Mass?  Seems to me it's just Haaavahdd.

Go paaaak y'caaaa in Haaavahrd Yaaaad.

[ZenAgent]

Sorry to worry the issue, but your excuses for the quick shifting of staff don't make sense.  Such a short time at a facility can't widen the experience much.

Stress...well, if you mean the kind of stress Clarke Poole was going through, I can understand.

Not making excuses, they were just my thoughts on the subject.  I dont think anyone knows for sure over all, maybe on a case by case bases it could be examined and then try to draw conclusions based the results of many.
The welding staff I was talking about has a large turnover rate, each persons excuse for leaving is a little different, but personally think it is just the nature of the job

No business looks for unstable past employment, especially at the administration level.  Is it possible these people are incompetent, because Vardell's career goes downhill, even more...Maybe these guys are turds spiraling their way down to the pipe, ASR being close to the bottom.

[TheWho]

Anne,  Not too far off the mark (your first post)!  It appears to be an older account based on some of the bans and reflections.  They don?t use the term peer groups anymore. Parents are welcome to come to visit, they can issue high school degrees I have been told.  They have added 2 or 3 more buildings since then a gym, swimming pool, new dorm I believe.  The school went thru some major growing pains and they have really grown over the years.  They are strict, but not abusive.  Kids are happy for the most part there.
Some seem to be Embellished war stories or questionable remembrances.

[TheWho]

Sorry to worry the issue, but your excuses for the quick shifting of staff don't make sense.  Such a short time at a facility can't widen the experience much.

Stress...well, if you mean the kind of stress Clarke Poole was going through, I can understand.

Not making excuses, they were just my thoughts on the subject.  I dont think anyone knows for sure over all, maybe on a case by case bases it could be examined and then try to draw conclusions based the results of many.
The welding staff I was talking about has a large turnover rate, each persons excuse for leaving is a little different, but personally think it is just the nature of the job

No business looks for unstable past employment, especially at the administration level.  Is it possible these people are incompetent, because Vardell's career goes downhill, even more...Maybe these guys are turds spiraling their way down to the pipe, ASR being close to the bottom.

Sure they do, depending on what they are willing to pay.  I wouldnt call them unstable because they are switching jobs.  The new people hiring know the industry also and are replacing people themselves.

[Deborah]

Who,
Did you participate in the survey?
Is your daughter considered on of Aspen's successes?

No I dont think so.  I filled out a follow-up of some sort but it was short, not much feedback was asked for, so I dont think it was a survey.
I dont know if she is considered one of their successes or not.  We had a show contact us and asked if we would be interested in being interviewed.  But we didnt do it.

Oh that's right. She was in the 98% who fail, and go back to drugs, then moved away and didn't speak to you for two years.
But, hey, she did catch up academically, which please you, but then never went to college.
That does sound like the typical success story.

[Anonymous]

Who,
Did you participate in the survey?
Is your daughter considered on of Aspen's successes?

No I dont think so.  I filled out a follow-up of some sort but it was short, not much feedback was asked for, so I dont think it was a survey.
I dont know if she is considered one of their successes or not.  We had a show contact us and asked if we would be interested in being interviewed.  But we didnt do it.

Oh that's right. She was in the 98% who fail, and go back to drugs, then moved away and didn't speak to you for two years.
But, hey, she did catch up academically, which please you, but then never went to college.
That does sound like the typical success story.

Let's just stop replying to him for a while. Try it & see how you like it. Silence doesn't necessarily implicate being WRONG or anything... "Being convinced I seek not to convince." E.A.P.

[TheWho]

Who,
Did you participate in the survey?
Is your daughter considered on of Aspen's successes?

No I dont think so.  I filled out a follow-up of some sort but it was short, not much feedback was asked for, so I dont think it was a survey.
I dont know if she is considered one of their successes or not.  We had a show contact us and asked if we would be interested in being interviewed.  But we didnt do it.

Oh that's right. She was in the 98% who fail, and go back to drugs, then moved away and didn't speak to you for two years.
But, hey, she did catch up academically, which please you, but then never went to college.
That does sound like the typical success story.

Hmm...  not sure where that is coming from or means.  I think that you asked me if I filled out a survey or not.  Guess I should have stuck to "No"

[Deborah]

Anne,  Not too far off the mark (your first post)!  It appears to be an older account based on some of the bans and reflections.  They don?t use the term peer groups anymore. Parents are welcome to come to visit, they can issue high school degrees I have been told.  They have added 2 or 3 more buildings since then a gym, swimming pool, new dorm I believe.  The school went thru some major growing pains and they have really grown over the years.  They are strict, but not abusive.  Kids are happy for the most part there.
Some seem to be Embellished war stories or questionable remembrances.

Wow, you know all this, but not the Directors' names?
What keeps you attached to ASR? Most parents 'move on'.